by Briann Danae
Sighing, Erica placed her head on his chest. The calming rhythm of his heartbeat instantly soothed her. She just knew any minute now, she’d be waking from a dream. Nothing in her life had ever gone as planned, and she thanked God for loving her so much that he decided to bless her with a man who made up for everything she was missing in life. Having no father, the toxic relationship with David, her doubts about being worthy of such a love that had you crumbling at the knees and allowing him to love her like a man should. Meechi was meant for her and, as unorthodoxed as their union had been, Erica couldn’t see herself having been brought together any other way.
Grabbing his face in her hands, Erica kissed his lips while he gripped her ass. She had always been thick, but the kids had added to her plushness and Meechi loved it.
“You cut you hair some,” he voiced, having always loved her short look.
“I did. It fit better with the dress.”
Lustfully, he let his eyes roan her frame and nodded. “You wearing the hell out of this dress, too. I can’t wait to give you this dick, woman. Fuck around and put another baby up in you,” he hissed, pulled her closer to him as the cameras flashed, capturing their moment.
Erica smiled up at him. “That’s fine.” She was so in love, that three-year wait period was a thing of the past. If Daddy wanted to put another baby up in her, she was going to let him.
“I love you,” she cooed.”
“I love you more, Mrs. Sutton; now, gone head and get ready to back that ass up on your husband.” He playfully smacked her ass, and the DJ congratulated them on their nuptials while everyone cheered and began to fill the dance floor.
At the bridal table, Sen was removing his hand from the inside of Neicey’s thighs. Though he was trying to be discreet but failed horribly, he licked his fingers like he was getting the remnants of chicken crumbs from them. Flustered and breathing heavily, Neicey released a huff.
“Dammit Sen. You probably stained my dress,” she hissed lowly.
He chuckled. “Nah. You ruined it with that wet pussy of yours. Here,” he said, handing her a cloth. “Or you want me to do it? I don’t mind.”
Snatching the cloth napkin, Neicey smirked. “No. You’ve done enough, nasty. I’m going to the bathroom. Meet me on the dancefloor when I get back.”
Sen frowned and looked down at his lap. “Get back? We about to go up in that mufucka together. You see this? You ain’t about to be popping your ass all over this shit. Now, come on before people realize we’ve been gone too long. Erica already keep looking over here. Ya face all red and shit.”
Locating her best friend, Neicey smiled a genuine smile. If anyone deserved happiness, it was her. Neicey couldn’t lie though. Sen had really surprised her these past few weeks, and she was the one who was happy as hell and not for fake this time. Their happiness and growth was extremely refreshing. After their heart to heart in Houston last week, she just knew things would go back to the way they had been before. To her dismay, they hadn’t at all.
Neicey knew things wouldn’t change in a week or overnight, but she was grateful for their stepping stone and progression. Repairing one relationship seemed to cause a ripple effect and, though she knew it was going to be extremely hard, she vowed to make amends with her mama and brother. They were hurt behind everything that had gone down, and shutting them out more than she already had been doing over the years was making Neicey feel horrible. The tough girl exterior and wall she had built up over the years was quickly crumbling down and she didn’t know why before, but she’d bet her last it was because of love. That real love. Got damn love and Sen’s ass.
Chapter Thirteen
“So, Sensay. It’s finally nice to meet you.”
Cutting his eyes at Neicey, she shrugged with a smirk. Wanting to get a better understanding of what she was going through, he agreed to join her in a counseling session. Not knowing she was even seeing a counselor, Sen felt bad as hell for being so disconnected from their relationship. It wasn’t that he was disconnected, but more so of Neicey keeping secrets very well. That had been something she was good at, so hiding her need to vent was a piece of cake.
“Yeah… you too. What’s your name again?” he questioned, relaxing back in his seat.
Fallone smiled. She could tell he was going to be a piece of work already. “Dr. Fallone.”
“And she been coming to you for how long?”
Fallone looked toward Neicey, giving her the go ahead to answer his question. Though she was the moderator over her sessions, her clients had freewill to run it themselves. She’d intervene when she saw fit.
“A little over a year,” Neicey spoke lowly. She wasn’t embarrassed by it but, now that she had said it aloud, she felt bad for not including him.
“Damn. A whole year and some change,” he chuckled, somewhat hurt. “Where I been at? I been that out of the loop that I can’t even tell when my woman needs to vent? She can’t even vent to me, her man?”
Neicey sharply turned in her seat to face him. “Sen, you know we talked about this. It was more than just venting. I needed professional help. Some shit I just couldn’t come to terms with, and Fallone helped me.”
She was trying her best to not let things go left. Fallone had praised Neicey for even considering receiving help. Mental illness was extremely real within the African-American community and, instead of people shunning others for their inability to cope on their own, they should offer help. And, help didn’t have to be them seeing a counselor.
Many of nights, Erica simply talked to Neicey on the phone for hours on end about nothing. She did simple things like encouraging her, even when she didn’t know Neicey had wanted to give up on life prior to her positive words. So many people thought that they had to give their opinion on people’s lives and what they should do, when really all they needed to be was a listening ear. It just so happened, some people got paid to do just that.
Though it took years for Neicey to disclose her need for help with anyone besides Erica, she struggled for years with depression. Not only that but with anxiety, loneliness, self-doubt, guilt, the list could go on. A fighter, she was, because some people shut down after one traumatic event and she had made it through three. She had a powerful story to tell, and she didn’t want to leave Sen out of the best part. Her glow-up, because it was coming.
“She knows about…” he asked, without wanting to say the word. It pissed him off just thinking about it, but he was trying to keep his cool.
Neicey nodded her head. “Say it.”
“The shit that fuck nigga did to you,” he spat. “She knows about everything?”
“Yes, um. Pretty much. I mean, that’s kind of how these things work. I have to be honest.”
“Not just with me, but with yourself,” Fallone added. “You’ve come a long way Neicey, and I’m proud of you. Sensay, how do you feel about all of this?”
Bothered, was what he wanted to say, but he wasn’t going to piss Neicey off. He wasn’t as bothered as he was before, but he still had some unanswered questions. Ones that had to do with her brother. For the life of him, he couldn’t understand how he had let a nigga that close to him take advantage of his little sister. Granted, Nolan had no idea what had happened, but Sen thought otherwise.
“I don’t know how I’m supposed to feel, since we being one hundred. A nigga still pissed off, you feel me? Something like that you can’t get over when you want to get over it. Unless you really didn’t care for a mufucka,” he spoke, and Neicey grabbed his hand.
“Do you feel like Neicey should have expressed to you her past?”
Sen looked at Neicey to see if she was cool with him answering that. He didn’t want to offend her. She nodded her head and urged him with pleading eyes to continue.
“In a way, yeah. Maybe all this shit could have been avoided. I walked into the shit blindly and didn’t want to ask questions. I just wanted to make whoever hurt her, feel that same hurt. Especially her fucking mama. That bitch-”
> “Sen,” Neicey hissed. Though they weren’t on good terms, she wasn’t about to let him disrespect her.
He smacked his lips and kept going. “She knew better, man. Or maybe she didn’t. I don’t fucking know. All I know is, her daughter needed her to make a crucial decision and she fucked up. My baby would have been a bomb ass mama, young as fuck or not. She shouldn’t have had to go through with that so young.”
Sen didn’t know whether Nakita just didn’t give a fuck or what, but he felt like she was out of pocket for allowing Neicey to get an abortion. For one, she was too young in his eyes. Whenever he messed up as a youngin’, he had to deal with the consequences. He felt Nakita should have given Neicey the same punishment. Having a baby was one thing, but having a baby that was a product of rape was on a total different spectrum. The thought alone made Neicey sick to her stomach.
Now that she was older, Neicey knew that some people would disagree on what happened between she and Kiran as rape, but that’s what it was. No, meant exactly that. And, Kiran disregarded her pleas. Gently or with force, Neicey was ashamed of how naturally submissive she had been to him that night. Every ounce of confidence she had was lost in those mere seconds, and she couldn’t understand why. She knew she didn’t want them to have sex, but her mind… it completely shut down.
Her body had rejected the request to reveal how she was really feeling, until it was too late. Kiran had unintentionally committed murder that night. He had killed Neicey’s spirit, her soul, her livelihood, and pride. Her being was altered, whether that be good or bad in her case, but she was never again herself. And, she still wasn’t, but she was getting there.
“It wasn’t just about the abortion. It was about why I wanted to go through with in the first place. All the odds were against me. He was my brother’s best friend that raped me. Had it been consensual sex, then maybe I would have wanted to keep the baby. I don’t know, maybe not. I couldn’t live with that. I’m not asking you to understand this instance because it took me a while to understand it all myself. Just… be supportive of whatever breakthrough this is I’m going through. Can you do that for me? That’s all I need.”
Scooting up in his seat, Sen grabbed Neicey’s hands. This was what he wanted. He had never truly heard her admit to him what happened and why, but he wasn’t going to force her to say anything else. If she wanted his ass to just shut up while she cried, he would do just that.
“I’ll do whatever, alright? Whatever it takes for us to get through this shit. If I have questions, I don’t want you getting upset. I’m just trying to understand, so we can be better. A nigga was losing his mind when you put me out.”
“I did not put you out, Sen. You just never came home,” Neicey laughed.
“Nah. Call it for what it is, baby. Don’t try and front cause’ we got company. You put me out, but it’s all good. I came back like I never left, and we’re good. I hate when shit is all off balance. You know a nigga can’t think clearly when shit off kilter,” he grinned, making Neicey shake her head.
She vowed never in life to date a Gemini, but Sen had snuck that in on her. By the time he told her his birthday, she was in love with his off crazy, split personality having ass, and she surely thought he was a Libra, the way his scales were never balanced. He’d literally be good one minute and, the next, spazzing out.
“It’s okay,” she laughed, leaning toward him. “I’ve learned to accept you, flaws and all.”
When she said that, a lightbulb went off in Sen’s head. The talk he previously had with his mama all made sense now. Though it made sense back then as well, Sen had finally understood what she meant on his terms. Smiling, he leaned in, gripping Neicey around her waist. Placing his lips close to hers, he just inhaled her air and smiled.
“You are so crazy,” Neicey laughed against his mouth.
“You love my crazy ass, though,” he replied before kissing her with so much passion, it brought tears to Neicey’s eyes. Sen hadn’t told not one lie, though. She indeed loved him. Craziness and all, no man could ever replace him.
***
A yawn escaped Neicey’s mouth and, as bad as she wanted to stay clocked in at work for the next few hours, she was ready to call it a day, for good. Working at Bryant and Dover was fun and a great learning experience, but it was time for her to move on. She knew if she didn’t, an unknown opportunity could present itself and she not be in a position to receive it.
In Neicey’s mind, it wasn’t about getting ready for change, it was about always staying ready. At any point in her life, she knew God would elevate her, and this was that time.
Last week, after she and Sen’s counseling session, she received a call from a lady who had attended a few of her pole classes. She didn’t know her personally, but Neicey’s personality made it feel like you did. For her, it was never about money when she opened Sensations. Though she made good money, she wanted to leave a lasting impression on whomever she ran across. She was building a brand, not just running a business.
It just so happened the lady’s sister was an up and coming screenwriter for a tv series airing in the Fall. With a guaranteed second season in the making, she was in search for a woman who specialized in pole dancing. Though, for the script, she decided to check Neicey’s place of business out for herself, even though her sister had raved about it. She didn’t ask Neicey on the spot but, instead, sent other women to her for lessons and then decided to give her a call.
Having never been presented with such an opportunity, Neicey prayed hard over her decision. It was life-altering, and an opportunity she had been preparing herself for but didn’t know it would come at such great measures. After her decision was made, she knew it was time to give Bryant her walking papers. She only directly dealt with him when it came to her position, and she hoped he took it well. If not, it didn’t matter anyway. She was still leaving.
“Jenna. Do you know if Bryant is in his office today?” she asked, swiveling her chair around.
Jenna’s eyes went wide and she waved her hand for her to come closer. Nosey as she was, Neicey wasn’t about to miss out on any office tea. Standing up, she crossed the room to where Jenna was sitting, and took a seat.
“You didn’t hear what happened?” Jenna asked in a hushed tone.
Playing it cool, Neicey just shook her head. “Not at all. What’s going on?”
“Well, you didn’t hear this from me.” Neicey discreetly rolled her eyes. A gossiping bitch was always trying to cover their tracks. “He was arrested last night for domestic abuse.”
“On his wife?” Neicey questioned, shocked as hell. Bryant did not seem like a man beater at all but, honestly, there wasn’t a type. A man would turn into Ike if he was provoked enough.
Jenna nodded her head. “She got caught cheating and, apparently, he strangled her. Didn’t kill her though, but she’s pressing charges.
“Wow,” was all Neicey could say. The nosiness in her wanted to ask more questions but, sadly, she just stood from the seat. “That’s…”
“Crazy! I know. Bryant was so mellow, but I’d be livid too if I found out my other half was cheating. I wonder how he found out?” Jenna pondered, with a shrug. “I’m sure the details will be floating around soon. Sad case, man.”
Neicey nodded her head. It was sad, but women cheated every day. Some just didn’t get caught. Walking over to her desk, she wasn’t trying to wait for the details to float around. She wanted them to float in her lap. Regardless of the drama going down today, she was still resigning. Knowing Dex was somewhat close with Bryant, from what she could tell, she was going to get the insider from him and let him know it would be her last day at the office. Even with her two-week notice letter written up, working for them for two more weeks was not the plan.
“I’m going down the hall for a second.”
“Okay. Could you grab me a muffin from the break room on your way back?” Jenna asked.
Neicey told her she would and headed down the hall. Even as just a recepti
onist, she received great benefits, but it was time to take that leap of faith. The opportunity to grow couldn’t have come at a better time. With she and Sen back on great terms, the thought of knowing how close she and Dex had been and almost gone that day in her studio, she no longer wanted to be around that temptation. Plus, Sen did not need another body on his hands because niggas wanted to test him. Dex had gotten two passes, and he had gotten lucky for those. A third one wasn’t going to happen.
Bending the corner toward his office, Neicey stopped when she passed the breakroom and heard whispering, or what they thought was whispering. She knew for a fact they had to be discussing Bryant’s situation, so she stopped by the door and listened closely.
“I can’t believe he was fucking his wife,” one male said, disgust dripping from his voice.
“Not only that but recording it as well. Bryant was mailed the fucking tape, Josh. Who does that type of thing?” a female said, and Neicey’s mouth dropped. She wished they’d hurry and get to the get shit before she got caught.
“Apparently, he does. Bryant got the man the best IT job in the entire building, and he goes and fucks his wife. Talk about being appreciative,” the guy scoffed, and Neicey was like a deer caught in headlights when they walked out. She couldn’t move, even if she wanted to.
“Oh!” Josh jumped back when he walked out of the room. “Hey! How’s it going?”
Finding her voice, she tried her best to smile. “Hey. Good. How are you?”
“You know. It’s just another one of those days around the office,” he said, before walking away.
“Tell me about it,” she replied to herself.
When her feet finally could move, she headed down the office to Dex’ door. In awe, though, she shouldn’t have been after the news she just heard, she couldn’t help but be. Dex’ office was spotless as it was the day he was hired. The walls were cleared of his awards, the desk held no sign of him having had piles off paperwork on it days prior, and the carpet had streaks in it from being freshly vacuumed.