My cell phone chimes. Christine. I look at the clock and frown. “What was wrong with this one?” I say, upon answering the phone.
“Eh, he picked his ears twice during the appetizer,” she groans.
Christine has been on a date every other weekend since we got back from Vegas. Whenever Scott has the girls, she’s out having the time of her life. When the girls are home with her, she’s Supermom times ten. She even sewed their Halloween costumes by hand this year. Apparently, taking Scott out of the equation made her a happy woman and a better mother. When Matt was in Michigan, I couldn’t parent alone. Parenting made no sense without him. With Chris, it’s completely the opposite. She thrives without Scott anchoring her and pulling her down.
“Maybe he had an itch. That’s not a reason to dismiss him so quickly. You’re just too picky,” I say, walking into the bathroom. “And yes that pun was intended.”
“Look, I told you before, I’m not out to fall in love, and all that bullshit. I just want to have some fun and play the field… and Ear-Picker-McGru was not fun,” she states. “Hey speaking of the field, how was the game tonight?”
“Great. Kev’s team won. He had two sacks in the backfield and one interception,” I reply, sitting down on the toilet.
“You know I have no idea what any of that means, right?” she confirms.
“I know—just know that we’re all happy and victorious here,” I say, smiling. She and I are so different, but so much alike. We’re the perfect fit. “Hey, have you talked to Jake, lately?”
“Yeah, earlier today. He’s coming to New York on business next week. We’re meeting up for drinks.”
“Drinks… and?”
“Drinks and nothing. Will you get it through your head that your brother and I are just friends?” she states, annoyed.
“Hey, a girl can dream, can’t she? Plus, I’d rather have him with you than—mother fucker!” I scream, pounding the phone on the counter. “Are you fucking kidding me?”
“What? What’s wrong?” she asks, worry in her voice.
“We’re out of fucking toilet paper.” Her laughter blasts through the phone, echoing against my ear. “Give me a goddamn break!”
“Funny you should say that,” she says, giggling. “That leads me to why I called.”
“Why? What’s up?” I ask, reaching for the tissue container on the sink, seething in frustrated anger.
Christine giggles and asks, “Did you know there’s a big author signing next summer in London?”
Readers: We do have a surprise of sorts for you. We have added scenes and some funny “extras” in the print copy of #TripleX. So make sure you get a paperback for more Zolendz/Stone-filled fun.
A Special Thank You to the following authors/bloggers for agreeing to “make cameos” in #TripleX.
(In Order of Appearance)
Colleen Hoover (and her piggy, Sailor)
Jasinda Wilder
Michelle Valentine (not the pornographic film star)
Jack Wilder
Kelli Maine (who would never hurt anyone)
Skye Jordan (aka: Joan Swan)
Virginia Carey at Love N. Books
Ellie McLove at Love N. Books
Thank you to Angela McLaurin at Fictional Formats for the creative and fun formatting of #TripleX.
Thank you to LP Hidalgo at Bookfabulous Designs for creating our fun, vintage, Chick-Lit #TripleX hot pink cover. We’re bringing Chick-Lit back, baby!
Dear Christine,
Thank you for liking me—truly, for actually liking me and WANTING to write a book with me. When you originally brought it up, I laughed and never really thought we’d actually do it. THANK YOU FOR MAKING ME DO IT. Chris, I have had more fun writing this book with you than I have had in a very long time. I cannot believe that here it is, January 12, 2015, six months after we started this thing, and we have still never met. Yet, I know more about you, your husband, your kids, and your life than I know about many of my “real” friends. I learned so much writing this book. I learned how to collaborate, how to compromise, and most importantly I learned how to let go and just laugh my ass off. Truthfully, after I quit my job, I was worried about my sanity, about staying home alone all day without human interaction and adult conversations. You saved me! Our daily talks that always end in belly-bouncing laughter are often the highlights of my lonesome afternoons. Thank you for being such a great long-distance friend. I still think we need to ditch our husbands this summer and actually do the things we conquered in this book. Because quite frankly, forty is a bunch of crusty bullshit.
To the readers of #TripleX, my God, thank you for reading our laugh-out-loud tale of two women trying to find themselves. Let me remind you one more time, women rock! We’ve got it rough being everything to everyone. But remember this, you have to be your own biggest fan—not your biggest critic. Look in the mirror every morning and say, “I got this,” because guess what? You do!
Readers, I’m sure you were a huge fan of Christine Zolendz’s before you began reading this book. However, if you happened to be one of my fans (or Deena Bright’s) and haven’t read any of Christine’s books, then you really need to do so. As you can see, she can really write. I’m in awe of her ability to create and describe a scene so clearly and vividly. It’s remarkable. You know that yoga scene? All hers! You know that unicorn that you all fell in love with? All hers! And she brought you back that 80s heartthrob, Jake Ryan. She’s got mad giggle and writing skills.
Christine started her writing career with the bestselling book, Fall From Grace. It’s the first book in the Mad World Series. It’s a paranormal, New Adult, sexy little series. Shane Maxton is one hot leading man. Chris thought she was a sweet, romance author, which is why she wrote the Mad World Series. Then, she quickly realized that she liked death, destruction, angst, and some hard-core, hot sex. (Who doesn’t, really?) That’s when Sam and Kade came along in Brutally Beautiful and Cold-Blooded Beautiful. You need to make sure you download all five of her books. You certainly won’t be sorry. Also, be on the lookout for The End of US. It’s her next novel coming out. Personally, I wanted it to be called Ash, but she doesn’t always listen to me. She tends to do her own thing from time-to-time. (Whore!) You should probably clear off an entire shelf on your bookshelf, because Christine Zolendz is going to fill it pretty damn quickly.
Christine and I really like to hear from our readers, so please find us on our social sites and touch base with us. We love when you share your feedback and funny anecdotes with us. You never know, your funny stories may end up in a book sometime. Again, thank you for reading #TripleX. Hopefully, you got some good laughs out of it, and you’ll recommend it to a friend or four hundred of them. Please remember, reviews are the best way to help authors get noticed.
If you’d like to contact me via email:
[email protected]
If you’d like to hook up on Goodreads and peruse my reading list:
https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/7166321.Angelisa_Stone
If you’re interested in all of my exciting and clever tweets (Oh my God, I’m a total bore on Twitter, but I’m going to try to up my game.):
https://twitter.com/Angelisaauthor
If you’re interested in the funny crap and hot guys that I pin on Pinterest, then check out my boards (I do have a #TripleX board):
http://www.pinterest.com/angelisastone/
I haven’t done much on Tsu, yet, but I am planning some giveaways, so come find me:
https://www.tsu.co/Angelisa
I have two Facebook pages. Check them both out! I’m a Facebook junkie to say the least.
https://www.facebook.com/angelisa.stone
https://www.facebook.com/pages/Angelisa-Stone-Author/142797549255355?ref=hl
I’m a technological imbecile, so Christine had to help me out. Look at the beautiful website she created for me. God, I love that girl. Someone buy her some cupcakes and M&Ms. My website:
http://carolannbbe.wix.com/b
rightstone
Other books by Angelisa Stone (and my many pen names)
Can’t Go Home (Oasis Waterfall Book 1) by Angelisa Stone
Amazon
Can’t Go Without (Oasis Waterfall Book 2) by Angelisa Stone
Amazon
Always There by Carol Ann Albright-Eastman (the real Angelisa/Deena)
Amazon
Schooled 4.0 by Deena Bright (Angelisa/Carol)
Amazon
Dear Carol-Angelisa-Deena (or whatever you’re calling yourself today),
You little bitch. You made me tear up with your letter to me. Sigh. I’m not good with this stuff. So here goes:
Thanks.
Thanks for not laughing at me when I said we should write a funny book together. You get my stupid jokes like no one else. You get me. Thanks for sticking through writing with me even when I didn’t know the “if-then” rule or when I showed my utter lack of sports knowledge. Thanks for just plain being my friend. I love our daily talks which are honestly just us laughing our bottoms off over everything that happens to us. And thank you from the bottom of my heart for letting me get my mid-life-crisis on with you, without actually having to kill my real non-fiction family or eating my weight in cupcakes. You are such an amazing friend. And I truly believe you are one of the funniest, most talented writers I have ever had the honor to read.
Carol Ann Albright Eastman is the writer of one of the most heart-warming and profoundly inspirational stories of life and grief, titled Always There. If you or anyone you know has ever felt loss, please pick up this book and I promise, you will finish it with a renewed sense of hope and comfort.
A little before Always There was published, something strange came over Carol. A sudden interest and love for angst and steam and gut-twisting smut. Writing under the pen name of Deena Bright, she created one of my favorite worlds: Schooled 4.0. A sizzling FOUR-book deal, scorching through the hot steamy lives of Janelle and all of her friends. Four hot tales that will make you squirm in your panties. Will you be Team Briggs or Team Leo?
Then sometime in 2013 Carol created another alter ego, Angelisa Stone, who created the Oasis Water Fall Series. The books, Can’t Go Home and Can’t Go Without, showcase her talent for character depth, storytelling, and creating an unforgettable, captivating romance you won’t be able to put down.
Honestly, I’m not sure if there are any other personalities lurking in that brilliant head of hers, but keep a lookout with whatever she’s coming out with next.
Thank you to all my readers. You know you have my heart. Thank you for letting me tell my stories, and thank you for giving me a chance. I love you all. Each one of you inspires me.
Thank you to everyone who picked up a copy of #TripleX. We hope you laughed. We hope you felt accepted. We hope you know you are perfect no matter what size or age you are. Eat as many cupcakes as you want. You only live in your skin once, and life is too short to worry about the little things. Just enjoy it.
If you want to stay in contact with me:
Christine Zolendz Newsletter:
http://goo.gl/forms/H2Wp2fgTJH
Website:
http://www.christinezolendz.com
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/ChristineZol?ref=hl
Twitter:
https://twitter.com/ChristineZo
TSU:
https://www.tsu.co/Christine_Zolendz
Pinterest:
https://www.pinterest.com/chriszo/
Email:
[email protected]
Other Books by Christine Zolendz
Paranormal Romance
Fall From Grace
Amazon
Saving Grace
Amazon
Scars and Songs
Amazon
Contemporary Romance
Brutally Beautiful
Amazon
Cold-Blooded Beautiful
Amazon
P.S. I don’t really like M&Ms, but I’d eat them any day for you.
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