The lab suddenly came into focus once more, but everything began to slow down. He had to stop Jaisa. He opened his mouth to yell `No!’â but for the first time his reactions weren’t fast enough, and desperately afraid, he watched Jaisa’s hand inching toward Zashou’s arm. Then the two females touched.
Rezac felt the backlash of the shock that flung Jaisa a good ten feet. Pain lanced through Zashou’s mind to be instantly echoed in his. Her body suddenly went limp, her eyes rolling back till only the whites showed.
He grabbed her, staggering himself as he came off his stool and found his legs unable to support him. He fell, managing to twist to one side so he didn’t land on her. Pain exploded in his skull as he struck it on the edge of a crate behind him.
*
Faces swam into view, then receded. He blinked, trying to concentrate. With a sickening lurch, his vision righted itself.
“What’s happened? Is she all right?” asked an angry voice he recognized as belonging to her husband Shanka.
He discovered that he was lying on the floor, his arms clasping Zashou close against his chest. A new face pushed the others away. Mentor Viaz. Irrelevantly he wondered what Viaz was doing in the lab. Trying to move, he found he couldn’t because of the way Zashou was lying across him.
Viaz reached out to move Zashou aside.
“No, she’s all right,” Rezac said sharply, pushing his hand away. “I can feel her coming round.” He stopped, realizing what he’d said. She was there, in his mind with him, and he could feel her surfacing to consciousness.
She stirred, moaning softly because of the pain in her head, then sat bolt upright, her panic filling everyone’s minds.
You’re in my mind! What are you doing there? Get out! she sent, fear on her face as she pulled free of him and scrambled backward, waves of nausea threatening to make her throw up. She fetched up against Vartra’s legs, looking round in panic.
Viaz’s hand moved closer to Rezac.
“Let me help,” he said.
Zashou’s nausea was affecting him, too. This time Rezac gratefully accepted the help, letting Viaz pull him into a sitting position. He put his hand to his head, bringing it away covered in blood.
“I think we should go up to the infirmary and dress that cut,” said Viaz calmly. “Dr. Vartra, perhaps you would be so kind as to bring Zashou.”
“Certainly,” said Vartra, bending down to help her.
Rezac looked round. “Jaisa?”
“She’s fine,” said Viaz. “Just winded, that’s all.”
He could feel Zashou’s panic still filling his mind. “For the Gods’ sake, stop it, Zashou,” he snapped. “I haven’t done anything to you, nor am I about to.” His head was throbbing fit to burst, as was hers.
“What the hell is going on?” demanded Shanka, trying to push past Vartra to his mate.
“Tiernay, see to Shanka, please. He’s to remain here,” said Vartra.
“A Leska Link?” Zashou said in horror, trying to pull away from the doctor. “No, it can’t be! Not Rezac, for pity’s sake! He killed Jaisa’s mother!”
Rezac staggered to his feet while Vartra made soothing noises to Zashou, holding onto her to prevent her from running away. Grasping the edge of the workbench, he took a couple of unsteady steps till he reached her. With Zashou’s mind wide open to everyone’s thoughts, his felt unbearably raw and exposed. He pushed Viaz aside and took hold of her by the upper arms, beginning to shake her.
“Stop it!” he said. “Get your mind under control now, Zashou. I won’t put up with your hysteria.”
His anger penetrated through her fear in a way reason couldn’t. Every mental barrier she had learned went up and she retreated behind them, fear in her eyes as she watched him. He tried to withdraw his thoughts from hers but couldn’t. He was forced to remain at the edges of her mind, a presence over which he had no control.
“Good,” he said, letting her go. “This Link isn’t my choice either, Zashou.”
“Liar!”
“Enough,” said Vartra. “Let’s go upstairs and discuss this in private.”
“I’m her husband, I’ve a right to go with her,” Shanka called angrily after them as they left the lab.
*
The discussion had solved nothing. Zashou made her feelings perfectly clear. The flashing images had been their exchange of memories as their minds had begun to Link for the first time. Now she knew everything about his past in Ranz and hated him for it. He’d stormed out in anger, heading out of the monastery to run through the woods until he was exhausted.
When he’d returned, he felt Zashou wake. Someone was at her bedroom door. Slowly he made his way along the corridor until he was standing just out of sight of her open door. He could hear the conversation in his mind as well as with his ears.
Shanka had finally been let out of the lab. He’d made straight for their room and had stormed in on her. “Where is he?” he demanded.
“Who?”
“Rezac! He’s here, or he’s been here,” he said striding over to the curtains and pulling them back.
“What are you talking about?” she asked, confused as she rubbed her hands across her eyes.
“Why was the door locked if you didn’t have him in here?”
“I was resting, I didn’t want to see anyone,” she said.
“I’m not anyone,” he snapped, prowling round the room, tail lashing, hackles up. “I’m your mate! It’s my room, too! Why did you have to choose him of all people? Why not me if you had to have a Leska?”
“You can’t choose your Leska, Shanka,” she said, and Rezac could sense her trying to keep her temper. “I didn’t choose him; it happened.”
“Don’t give me that! You’ve no right to have a Leska, you’re married.”
“I have as much right to have a Leskaâ or loversâ as you.”
“You know I don’t have one,” he said, his voice becoming deceptively calm.
“No,” she said coldly, “you have lovers, in fives at a time!” She turned away from him.
He grunted contemptuously. “You’ve had lovers, too.”
“So what? Ours was never a love match, only an arrangement between our families. You’re not denying me the rights of any Sholan are you?”
“Damned right I am! You’re my mate, you’ll not take any more lovers!”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Shanka,” she said, rounding on him. “You’ve no right to tell me what to do. I’ll do as I choose.”
“Not Rezac. You’ll not have Rezac,” he snarled, advancing on her.
“I haven’t said I want him! Just leave me alone, Shanka. Get out of here and leave me alone!” She began to back off as he got closer, his hand outstretched to grab her.
Rezac waited no longer. “She told you to leave,” he said.
Zashou’s eyes widened as she saw him standing in the open doorway.
Shanka turned round. “This is none of your business,” he snarled, ears lying sideways in anger.
“You want him out?” Rezac asked, looking at Zashou over Shanka’s head.
She hesitated.
You want him to leave? he sent.
She nodded slowly, backing farther into the room.
Rezac stepped in. “Out, now,” he said, jerking his head toward the door in case the other was in any doubt.
“Get the hell out, Rezac, you’ve no right to interfere!”
Reaching forward, Rezac grabbed Shanka by the tunic. “I said out! You want to argue in the corridor, fine, but not in here,” he said, hauling him out through the open doorway.
Zashou followed them. A portion of his mind heard the sound of running feet. An image of Tiernay and Goran flashed into his mind as Zashou turned to look at them. They skidded to a stop beside him and Shanka.
“We’ll take it from here, Rezac,” said Tiernay as Goran grasped Shanka firmly by the arm and began dragging the protesting youth down the corridor.
Rezac let him go and shrugged, feigning ind
ifference. “I’ll settle it with him later.”
“We picked up what happened. We’ll see to it,” repeated Tiernay, laying a restraining hand on Rezac’s arm.
Shaking himself free, Rezac moved aside and locked eyes with the group’s leader. “He’s my problem now, Tiernay. Keep him away from her. She’s my Leska.”
Tiernay looked away first. “Violence isn’t an answer.”
“Tell him that. He was about to strike her.”
“He’ll be dealt with. Your attitude could endanger our work, Rezac. We’ll see he doesn’t threaten Zashou again. Leave him alone,” Tiernay ordered before turning to follow Goran and Shanka.
Aware of her mounting fear of him, Rezac looked over to Zashou.
She took a step back into the room, standing partly behind the door frame.
He shook his head. “I’m not going to touch you,” he said. “I only came because I felt your fear. They’ll see to Shanka this time. He won’t bother you again. If he does, send to me. I’ll deal with him. All right?” He waited, but she said nothing, only looked at him with eyes enlarged by fear.
“All right?” he repeated.
She nodded.
“Good,” he said, then left.
Mental barriers up, he ran through every curse he knew on his way back to his room. That damned Leska Link! He thought he’d left his past behind him, but now she knew everything, just as he knew everything about her, and she was terrified of him. She was too scared to see why he’d had to join the pack or how he’d been trapped in it with no way out until the University scouts had picked him up. They’d understood how he’d been trapped and had wiped the slate clean, given him and his family a fresh start. She wouldn’t. All she’d ever seen was her fear of him.
His legs twitched, waking him from what was becoming an increasingly distressing memory. His first waking awareness was of the little Human. The meal was over and they were returning to their quarters in the tower. That Taradain was interested in Jo had become obvious. However, nothing he’d said or done had smacked of any impropriety. He knew this was true because he realized he was there, at the edges of her mindâ and she’d felt him.
What the… ! Rezac, get the hell out of my mind!
He tried to back away but found it nigh on impossible. Redoubling his efforts, he succeeded and instantly retreated behind his shields. His face creased in worry. What was happening to him? He knew he hadn’t consciously reached for her, so how had he managed to wake up linked to her? Hearing them outside the door, he hastily pushed the worries aside and tried to compose himself. He hoped she wouldn’t ask him for an explanation because he didn’t have one.
Chapter 8
The door opened, admitting Jo first. She stormed over to Rezac and stood squarely in front of him.
“Just what the hell was that all about?” she demanded in a low voice. “You were in my mind, and you took what happened at dinner with Taradain from me! You invaded the privacy of my mind, Rezac!”
He sat up instantly, aware of the two Human males standing by the worktable, keeping a watchful eyeâ and earâ on their interchange.
“I was concerned,” he said, aware it was a lame comment to make.
“You had no right to pry into my mind! What I do is none of your concern!”
“You’re right, I have no excuse,” he said, desperately trying to keep his eyes on her face. This was the first time he’d seen her displayed in female clothing, and he found it unnerving. She was breathing rapidly in her distress and anger, and it was causing a fascinating effect on what he could see of her breasts above the low front of her dress. It was the first time he’d been aware of that part of Human femininity.
He forced himself to look away. “It was just concern,” he said in a rush, standing up. “I’ll try to see it doesn’t happen again. It was instinctiveâ to protect a female.” He knew he was babbling, but he couldn’t help it, not when he could see her smooth, curved flesh and smell her scent so strongly. She gave out all the signals of motherhood, yet he knew for a certainty that she was not pregnant, nor ever had been.
Stepping past her, he fled for the room he shared with Zashou, angry, confused, and ashamed at the emotions that were coursing through him.
As he entered, Zashou regarded him from the bed. “I didn’t think you’d be that attracted to her,” she said. “There must be something to what they’ve been saying about these mixed Leska pairings after all. Thank the Gods I’m not interested in either of the males!”
“Leave me alone, Zashou,” he said, heading for his pallet by the fire and lowering himself down onto it. “You know I can’t help it.”
“Maybe now that you have someone else to bother, you’ll leave me alone more often,” she continued, her tone waspish.
He looked over to the bed. In the firelight, he could see her only dimly. “What I feel for you,” he said quietly, “that can never change. I don’t know what thisâ emotionâ I have for her is, but it can’t alter that.”
“Pity. It would take the pressure off me. Just don’t assume because she’s got you aroused that you’re coming anywhere near me, because you aren’t! Go take a cold shower!”
He began to growl softly in anger. “Damn you, Zashou! I’ve never done anything to harm you! Why do you have to treat me like this? It wasn’t my fault we Linked!”
“You wanted me! That’s why the Link happened,” she hissed angrily. “I had a husband, a life, before that! And as for never hurting me, you almost raped me the first time!”
His growl rose in pitch. “You can lie to yourself, Zashou, but that night, you were as eager to pair with me as I was with you! Now leave me alone!” He flung himself down on his bed, wrapping the blankets around himself, cutting off her voice. Raising his shields, he did his best to block her, but memories of their first night began to surface. Memories helped sometimes, and of course he had both hers and his of that night.
She’d wakened confused, not sure what had brought her out of her uneasy sleep.
*
Rezac crouched in a patch of deep shadow, watching her, keeping his mind still lest she sense his presence. Each minute that passed was forcing them together whether they wished it or not. His presence here in her room was evidence of that. It had been utter madness on his part to creep in while she was asleep, but being close by her had, at least, eased the ache, the longing to hold her.
He shook his head slowly, trying to stop thinking about it, but like his tongue would probe at a sore tooth, he couldn’t stop. The Link was amplifying the attraction he already felt for her. He knew he was probably making it worse for himself by coming in to look at her, but it didn’t matter. When she fell asleep again, he’d leave. He shut his eyes as another bout of nausea hit him.
*
Zashou lay still. There was someone else in the room. Rezac. It had to be him. She recognized his presence. Despite herself, she felt her body responding to his nearness. She pushed herself up on one elbow, catching the glint of his eyes as he looked over at her.
Outside, the clouds parted and a shaft of moonlight stabbed through the window beside her, dazzling her briefly.
*
He stood by the bed looking down at her with no memory of having crossed the room.
*
Zashou blinked up at him. Putting her hand up to her eyes to shade them, she sat up.
*
The beads in her hair chimed softly against each other, arousing him to fever pitch. He caught hold of her wrist, feeling their Link flare into thought-sharing despite his block.
Rezac?
“I don’t like this any more than you,” he said. “I don’t want a mate. Females weaken your will, tie you to one placeâ make you vulnerable.” He knelt on the bed, ears flicking as he watched her. Why did it have to be her of all females, the only one who mattered to him?
Stretching out for her, he let his anger build, let it overwhelm her presence. He didn’t want to feel her thoughts, not now, not e
ver. He knew she feared and hated him; that was enough. He slipped his free hand behind her head, pulling her face close, nipping at her cheek, then her jaw. Releasing her wrist, his other hand went behind her back as he pushed her down onto the bed again. His hand slid down to the looser skin at the base of her neck and grasped her tightly by the scruff, his mouth closing over her throat.
She froze under him, then slowly tipped her head back, making no move to escape.
Mentally he pushed aside the surprise he felt. He didn’t care why she had surrendered, nor even if she did. This Leska Link left them no choice. The need to have her was dominating him and despite his anger and the block, he could now sense the same urgency in her, not only from her mind, but from her body.
Light-headed, he released her. Sitting up again, he ran his hands slowly through her silky fur, feeling the suppleness of her body beneath. She felt even softer than he’d imagined. The bed cover stopped him and impatiently he pulled it aside as his body responded to her proximity.
“Rezac, not like this, please,” she said urgently, keeping her voice low so as not to carry.
He stopped to strip his tunic off. While he did, she tried to move away but he grasped her round the hips and pulled her back.
“You’ve got Shanka for the polish, I’m as you find me.” His voice was low and rough as he leaned over her.
“Rezac, no!” She struggled in his grip, one hand trying to prise his hand away, the other hitting at his face. “I submitted, don’t just take me!”
He snarled at her, his hands going to catch hers, pinioning them against the pillow in one of his.
Not like this! Please, Rezac! she sent frantically as he guided himself into her. In that first moment of contact, his mind exploded, then she was clinging to him, as caught up as he in the maelstrom of their emotions and desires.
Where they touched, a current seemed to flow between them, sweeping their minds together in a whirlpool of sensuality till they were one. Time seemed to stretch as they shared each other’s every sensation. His mouth found her ear as his hands closed over her shoulders. She felt so warm and soft pressed against him, smelled so good. It was all he’d dreamed of, and more.
razorsedge Page 34