Thaddeus moaned deeply, then emitted a feral growl and exploded into her. Jana’s high-pitched cry at her peak spiraled Thaddeus into new heights of joy. Together they came, sighing with pleasure. When he’d given his all, Thaddeus slumped against the mattress and closed his eyes. Jana fell forward onto his chest with her cheek against his neck.
For a few minutes, neither moved. Thaddeus didn’t want to disturb the slice of paradise or let go of his love. He might not share his feelings, but he couldn’t lie to himself. He loved Jana, and she was the first and only woman to have his heart.
Jana slid off and gazed at him. “Mmm,” she said, then put her palm on his cheek.
“I couldn’t have said it better.” Thaddeus tossed back the sheet. “What do you say we try out that Jacuzzi?”
“I thought you’d never ask.”
Jana took his hand, and he guided her to the oversized bathroom. When the tub was filled, she slid into the warm water. Thaddeus sat across from her. The tub was large enough for him to extend his legs. The jets pulsed around them, soothing any aches or tiredness.
Under the water, Thaddeus stroked her leg with his toes. “This is nice.”
“My vocabulary seems to have escaped me. Mmm is all I can say.”
Jana looked into his eyes and their gazes locked. “I love you,” she said.
Thaddeus hadn’t expected her to say that. He was in way over his head. Jana’s emotion, her honesty, her love had broken through his barriers. He nearly told her that he loved her too, but the words stuck in his throat. He couldn’t give her what she wanted.
“Jana…honey…you are the most remarkable woman I know.” Thaddeus struggled. He wanted to say the right thing. But he understood action better than words. Jana had fallen for him, but he lacked the social skills to deal with it.
What was a man supposed to say at a time like that?
“I just…” Thaddeus stalled, at a loss. “If we continue like this, you’ll expect—”
“No,” Jana said, holding her hand up. “I don’t expect anything…just you.”
Thaddeus was speechless.
“I’m not asking you for anything.” Jana’s eyes were soft. “I wanted to share how I feel about you. I thought you should know.”
She got out of the water and wrapped a towel around her, then she smiled. “Anyway, if you recall, I was the one who started things last night.” She headed toward the door but glanced back. “So, don’t go feeling guilty.”
Thaddeus got out, dried off, then dressed in yesterday’s clothes. He met Jana in the living room. She looked surprisingly refreshed. When he stepped closer, she reached for his hand. “Let’s go eat breakfast. A woman can work up quite an appetite around you.”
Thaddeus laughed, then opened the door for her.
Breakfast was served in the atrium. The menu included a long list of items from scrambled eggs and bacon to sausage, oatmeal, and pancakes. Thaddeus was ravenous and tempted to order everything on the list. He kept it to a dull roar with the breakfast buffet, where he could get all the above, plus breakfast potatoes, fruit, and coffee.
Jana selected a more modest portion. She opted for the buffet, also. But chose French toast and yogurt, with a side of fruit. She settled into the table across from him with a smile.
Thaddeus had devoured the eggs and was a good way through his syrup-soaked pancakes. “What are you smiling at?”
Jana munched on a bite of French toast. “I’m smiling at you. It’s such a pleasure to watch you eat.”
Thaddeus grinned. “I’m glad I could be entertaining.”
It was good to focus on eating, on something besides his relationship with Jana. As he chewed on a hunk of sausage, Thaddeus realized that the whole thing was a new experience for him. And he hadn’t seen it coming.
Jana’s verve for life, her exuberance, and the way she gave her all to any activity had melted his reserve. Thaddeus, who’d considered himself a tower of emotional strength, had been ripped asunder by a woman. In retrospect, he should have had a clue.
Her grandmother had warned him. Icelandic women were known for their independent attitudes and self-reliant natures. That was why Eva had hired him in the first place. She’d searched for a man of the same heritage, one capable of handling such a strong woman.
Thaddeus had sworn that he was up to the task. Yet he hadn’t predicted falling for her. He’d fallen hard, and Jana had vowed she loved him.
Thaddeus was torn and confused. Dealing with matters of love was beyond him; he was out of his depth. He had to let her know.
After he finished every morsel on his plate, Thaddeus leaned back to sip his coffee. He watched Jana shuffle some fruit around her plate. “It’s not you, you know,” he said.
Jana looked up. “What do you mean?”
“You are an amazing woman.” Thaddeus put his cup down. “I’m not that great with words. But I want you to know…the man who gets you will be one lucky guy.”
“But that’s not you. Is that what you’re trying to say?”
“I’m used to being alone,” Thaddeus said. “I was trained to be alone; it was a requirement for my duties. I can’t go into detail, but I think you get the idea.”
Jana waited for him to continue.
“It would have been next to impossible to sustain a relationship. I joined the Navy so young. It was all I knew,” Thaddeus said. “Then when I got out…” He shook his head. “Dating was awkward for me. I didn’t have the social graces. And after what I’d seen on deployment, well, I’d hardened my heart.”
Jana reached across the table to touch his hand.
“In high school, there was one girl I was sweet on. But she dumped me, and I thought my heart was broken. But I didn’t have a clue what love was. Besides, that was a smart move on her part.” He tried to get his thoughts together.
“I haven’t married. You must see that I’d be a poor choice for a husband,” Thaddeus said, then squeezed her hand. “I do okay in the bedroom, though.”
Jana smiled. “I can attest to that.” She released his hand. “You’re trying to tell me that this can’t continue. That we don’t have a future together.” Her expression was sad. “I already knew that. You didn’t have to tell me.”
With a napkin, Jana dabbed at her eyes. “You’ve talked, so now it’s my turn.” She took a breath. “I have no regrets. I’ll always cherish this time we’ve had together.” She paused. “But I think that you underestimate yourself. You’d be a lot better at relationships than you think. You just haven’t tried.”
Jana stood up. “Shall we go?” She motioned toward him. “Aren’t you supposed to be protecting me or something?”
Thaddeus guided her out of the restaurant, then checked out of the resort. She was right: it was time to return to reality and deal with the attacks against her. That was something that he could do—and he would. She could count on him for that.
Chapter 15
The morning of the long-anticipated test arrived. Jana would finally see how her invention worked in the hands of a pro athlete. She was glad it was Coley, someone she trusted. She needed honest feedback and required that the tester be experienced and competent.
Thaddeus made sure that Jana arrived early. It was a very important day. As she walked toward the club, she felt a thrill. The biathlon combined the physical challenge of cross-country skiing with the psychological demands of rifle marksmanship. The origins dated back to hunting and military campaigns in snow-covered regions.
Jana considered it a heroic sport. It was the natural way people had skied long before downhill skiing came into vogue. She’d become close friends with Coley when they’d competed at a high level in their twenties. Even over the age of thirty, Coley was strong and fit. She was a good choice for testing the microchip.
The recent snow covered the mountain trails. The club had a snow-making machine, since skiing was offered year-round. But Jana preferred the real deal. It added to the atmosphere of the event that the snow-packed h
ills were due to nature.
“I stored a set of skis here,” Jana said. “That way, I don’t have to lug them around.”
Thaddeus nodded. “The shooting part of this event is what I’m not keen on, but I know it’s mandatory.”
“That’s what this whole thing is about.” Jana looked up at him. “The key is to see if Coley can better her time using my biofeedback device.” She paused. “And if it makes you feel better, she will be using an air rifle. A blast of air will hit the target, not a bullet.”
“I’m aware of that,” Thaddeus said. “But it doesn’t mean a regular .22 couldn’t be carried at the event. If it was custom made to look like the others, it would be difficult to spot.”
“I guess that’s possible,” Jana said. “If it was made to look like the biathlon rifles.” She pondered that.
The space-age-looking rifles used in the event were designed to perform in the most brutal course conditions at temperatures below zero. And the bolt action was unusual, allowing the competitor to pull the bolt back with the trigger finger to remain perfectly on target due to minimal hand and finger movement.
“Those rifles stand out, though. The bolt action doesn’t even look like a regular rifle.” Jana was about to say that Thaddeus was overly concerned, but she’d had enough close calls to know better. If he thought there was a chance that her enemy would smuggle a real rifle disguised as a biathlon rifle, then she had to believe it.
At the start line, Jana went over to Coley. “Are you all set?”
“I’m as ready as I can be.” Coley wore a harness; the backpack-like straps allowed her to carry her rifle on her shoulders.
Jana glanced at the hinge at the end of the rifle barrel with a metal flap over the muzzle. The cover would keep snow from entering the barrel, but could be flipped open prior to setting up on the range.
Then she saw Coley’s husband walk over. “Michael, good to see you,” Jana said, and gave him a hug. He was tall and handsome, also a skier. They’d been married for five years, and he’d been good for Coley.
Michael greeted everyone, then met Thaddeus. He hugged his wife. “I’ll be here for moral support.”
Coley beamed, and Jana looked up at Thaddeus. “She’s got one up on me,” she said, motioning toward Michael. “She found this great guy and married him.” Then she balked, realizing the comment might have made Thaddeus uncomfortable.
If it had, Thaddeus didn’t show any sign of it. “Glad to meet you,” he said, then guided Jana toward the lodge, so they could get their gear on.
“I can’t tell if I’m anxious or excited,” Jana said. “I just want this to happen already. It’s a big moment.”
“It’s a big deal,” Thaddeus said. “I know how hard it is to consistently hit small targets while under pressure. When your heart is thumping at a hundred and eighty beats per minute, it seems impossible to hit targets the size of silver dollars.”
“And from both standing and prone positions.” Jana had done it many times. She’d had to fire between heartbeats, as it wasn’t feasible to calm down quickly enough after a ski run. But what if it was?
That was what her invention was all about. Coley had practiced with it, learning to calm her heartbeat. But doing so in competition might be different; the stresses were different. To make it realistic, other skiers would compete, but only Coley would have the microchip to assist her.
At the lodge, Jana ran into Rakel. He had competed in the sport years ago. It was one thing they’d had in common. He was also a ski tech and had worked on her skis many times. After the divorce, she’d employed a different tech.
It was a nerve-racking day, so seeing her ex was annoying. “What are you doing here?”
Rakel smirked. “I ski at this club too, you know.” He glanced at Thaddeus then back at Jana. “I had to come and see the fun.” He shrugged. “It’s not every day that the entire morning is reserved. When I checked that out, I learned about your trial.”
“You seem to know a lot about my business.”
“I try to.”
Jana waved her hand. “Well, stay away from me. I need to focus.” She glanced back at Rakel, who hadn’t moved. “And don’t interfere…please.”
Once Jana picked up her skis and Thaddeus rented a pair, she headed back to the ski area. There weren’t many spectators, since it was a private event. But she saw Coley preparing at the start line. The run would be managed by a professional, since it was better if Jana wasn’t involved.
But she couldn’t just stand around waiting. “We’ll take one of the back trails after the competition starts. We’ll have plenty of time to ski.” The cross-country part of the competition was the length of a marathon, so it wouldn’t be a quick race.
Thaddeus carried his skis and walked beside her. It was good to have him there. Also, she would have a partner to help take her mind off the trial. She’d be skiing, not shooting, but it would be sufficient to keep her occupied.
Then a figure blocked her path. It was a male skier in his mid-thirties. He had a long, sort of rectangular face, and sported a short beard. He seemed vaguely familiar, but Jana couldn’t place him. “Excuse us,” she said, and started to move past him.
“Jana?” the man said.
Jana squinted at him. “I’m sorry. Have we met?”
Thaddeus hovered beside her, scrutinizing the man.
“You haven’t changed much,” the man said. “Remember me? Roston Vang…surely you haven’t forgotten.”
“Ross?” For a moment, Jana wasn’t sure this was the same person. His face was more grizzled, his skin leathery, and he wasn’t even that old. But his features rang a bell. When she looked closer, she saw that he was the competitor she’d known years before.
“Yes, it’s me. I’m glad you remember.”
Jana was stunned. “I thought you lived in Reno, or that’s what I heard…quite a few years ago.”
“Can’t a guy try out a different club?”
There was a look in his eyes, as if there was something he wasn’t saying. “I suppose, but you picked the wrong day. The club is reserved for the morning. You’ll have to come back.”
Roston shrugged. “That’s too bad. I guess I’ll just watch.” He didn’t seem anxious to go. “Are you going to introduce me to your friend?”
The encounter didn’t feel very social, but Jana made the introduction anyway. “Sure, this is Thaddeus. He’s going to ski with me.”
“Nice to meet you, Thaddeus.” A glimmer in Roston’s eyes unnerved Jana. She didn’t wish to continue the conversation. “Well, it was unexpected to see you again. There won’t be much to watch out there. The event won’t be televised.”
That got no response from Roston, so Jana just walked away. She did remember him, but not in a good way. The guy had been kicked out of the sport. It had been quite the spectacle.
When the trailhead appeared, Thaddeus put his skis down. “How do you know that guy?”
“Ross competed in the sport when I did, but he was a cheater,” Jana said. “He was one of those pain-in-the-ass guys, the type who take advantage. I’ve known him to go as far as to cut in front of a competitor on a high-speed run.”
While listening, Thaddeus put on his skis.
“He had quite an illustrious career. There were stories about fights, breaking windows with his bare hands, lockups in police holding tanks…even being sent home early from competitions.”
“Sounds like he had an alcohol issue.”
“I’d say so, yet he fancied himself as Olympic material. He tried to qualify for the trials.”
“Let me guess…he didn’t make it?”
“No, he didn’t,” Jana said. “Roston Vang is a name remembered in the sport, but not due to his physical prowess.” She finished putting her skis on. “His grand finale was to get banned from the sport for doping.”
“How long since you’ve seen him?”
“Uh…let me think. Well, I haven’t competed at that level for over seven years, s
o at least that long.” Jana zipped up her jacket. “I hardly recognized the guy. It isn’t just the age, but something else. He looks so…”
“Like a guy with a chip on his shoulder?” Thaddeus said. “I picked that up too.”
“Anyway, I hope he doesn’t hang around my club,” Jana said. “I heard that he lives in Reno, so he’s a bit far from his neighborhood.”
Jana didn’t want to talk about the unwelcome encounter. The trial had begun, so she preferred to focus on skiing. The air was fresh and cold, the mountain heavy with snow. It was ideal for a ski run. She preferred going fast when she could. She’d chosen a back trail to ski with Thaddeus, so there wouldn’t be anyone to get in the way.
Coley was well into the competition, on a different trail. Jana wouldn’t be able to see her, but she’d be thinking about her. It would be quite the experience to use the microchip during competition. She couldn’t wait for the feedback.
Jana started up the trail with Thaddeus beside her. It wasn’t long before her attention was on skiing. The effort of cross-country tended to eliminate distractions. The sun was hidden by clouds, making it a gray day. But that suited her. She liked the cold, the snow, and the majestic slopes even at their darkest.
After a while, Jana worked up speed. Once her muscles warmed up, she gained momentum. The uphill parts were slower, but on the downhill sections, she sailed along at over thirty miles per hour. The pine trees flew by as she glided over the snow.
Thaddeus kept up, sticking close. He left room, so it wouldn’t be dangerous. But he seemed to effortlessly stay right behind her. Jana had a competitive urge, so tried to speed up to lose him. It was a challenge that she was sure he wouldn’t ignore.
Thaddeus kept pace with her. No matter how she tried, Jana couldn’t lose him. She smiled. Cross-country was in her blood; there was nothing like being out on the slopes. She crested a hill then cruised down the slope.
Jana had gained speed, so had been marginally slowed by the ridge of the hill. She was right back to sailing along over the snow. Then her ankle wobbled. Her heart skipped a beat.
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