by Lacey Thorn
“It unnerves me when you look at me that intensely. You’re eyes are all weird, glowing yellow and shit,” Murphy snapped. “So just ask what you want and let’s go.”
“I know you’re getting antsy, and it seems to be getting worse. I won’t be effective help if you keep me in the dark,” Zane said. He ignored the jibe about his eyes. He’d heard some variation of it all his life. He didn’t give a shit.
“I…I’m sorry, man,” Murphy said with a grunt and shake of his head. “I have this really bad feeling, and I can’t shake it. I can feel Finn in here.” He thumped a fist against his chest. “I feel pain. God, my skin is fair to crawling with dread.”
“You shouldn’t have asked me not to say anything when I called Tah,” Zane said with a grumble. “Especially knowing Finn was taken.”
Murphy reluctantly nodded. “Someone took him at that spot where we found his phone outside of Santa Fe. Makes sense it was hunters following the signal the transmitter was putting out.”
Neither of them mentioned the fact the device was turned off when Finn took it. It was understood Finn would have turned it back on as soon as he was far enough away from them. Zane just hoped they found Finn in time to tell him how stupid he was.
“The campsite we found. I could smell the mixture of scents there. Sweat laced with hate. Blood.” Zane met Murphy’s gaze without flinching. “You know what I am.”
“I suspected,” Murphy agreed with a nod. “What’s your spirit?”
“Panther,” Zane answered. “My uncle, too.”
“Bet those eyes look just as eerie on a panther,” Murphy said.
Zane paid no attention to the remark he was sure Murphy had intended to lighten the conversation. They were past that. There was heavy-duty shit going on. They needed honesty and communication. He was willing to hold some things back out of respect for the man he’d fought with as a Marine, but only if he knew why. “What I can’t figure out is what your spirit is.”
Murphy sighed. “Let’s just focus on getting to Finn.”
“You can’t run forever,” Zane warned. “At some point you have to claim a home. You know Tah will always see you as a member of this pride we’re creating.”
Murphy nodded. “I know, and I really hope to be a permanent part of it. But right now all I can think of is my brother out there. I promised to keep him safe. I promised.”
“Talk to me, Murph,” Zane pleaded as he started the engine and shifted into gear.
Murphy blew out a puff of air and finally began to talk. “Finn was born the same year I was. I came in January, and he followed in December. We’ve always been close.”
“You’re brothers,” Zane said. “Family, and family guards each other’s backs.”
“Not always,” Murphy muttered then shook his head as if that was something he didn’t want to discuss.
Zane wondered at the story behind that comment.
“Finn decided he needed to look out for me,” Murphy continued. “I kept telling him I was the older brother, and I was supposed to do the watching over. He never understood that.”
“He took the transponder as much for you as to make amends to Reno and Amia,” Zane stated. He’d wondered why Finn would feel the need to make amends like that. But protecting his brother? That was something Zane could definitely see Finn doing. Hell, the two brothers were always tripping over each other, trying to keep an eye out for the other.
Murphy nodded. “Probably more for me than to make any amends. He sees his actions as justifiable in the moment. As far as he’s concerned, he did what he was told, and he refuses to believe anyone can hold a grudge when he pours on the Irish charm.”
Zane smiled. That sounded just like the Finn he knew. “You Dockerys can be all charm when you want to.”
“It’s come in handy a time or two,” Murphy said. “Finn has such an easy smile. He’s always been a happy guy. Christ, I just want to see that grin of his again. Soon. And when I find him and know he’s safe, I’m going to kick his fucking ass for putting me through this.” Murphy gasped and grabbed his chest. “Ahhh, God. The pain. Jesus, my chest is burning.”
“What’s the matter?” Zane demanded, swerving to the side of the road.
“No,” Murphy yelled. “Keep driving. I can sense him. God, my body feels like it’s been set on fire. What are they doing to him? Jesus. What are they doing?”
“You’re linked?”
Murphy groaned. “Yes. We have been since we were just boys. When I was…” He gritted his teeth and swallowed then started again. “When I was forced to leave, he came with me.”
Zane said nothing for a while. He could tell Murphy wanted him to let it go, but he couldn’t. He was keeping secrets from his alpha. The least Zane deserved was some honest answers. “What happened?” Zane asked long moments later.
“Hunters,” Murphy said, his voice sounded bitter as if there was a hatred that burned deep inside him he couldn’t contain.
“A Blane?” Zane questioned as things began to click into place in his head.
“No, but a hunter is a hunter,” Murphy stated.
“That explains Finn’s reaction to Amia. Why didn’t you tell anyone you’d had a run in with hunters before? You know Tah needs information.”
“And I have none, unless you want me to share what a body looks like when they’re all done torturing it,” Murphy snapped.
Zane glanced at him a few times before asking the question he knew Murphy was waiting for.
“Who?”
Murphy shut his eyes as if desperate to keep his memories at bay. “Christ, I see it every day as if it were just moments ago—red hair matted with blood. Green lifeless eyes. Limbs splayed at odd angles where bones had been broken then broken again. The smell of fear and pain and death. The hatred in my dad’s eyes, mirrored in the stares of my two older brothers.” He looked at Zane through the eyes of a man broken by tragedy. “Mum. They killed my mum, and I’ll spend the rest of my life making sure every one of them pays for it.” He gritted his teeth and jerked his head back, hissing out his breath while he pressed the heel of his hand against his chest. “Drive faster, Zane. I’ve got a really bad feeling.”
Zane reached over and squeezed Murphy on the shoulder. “You’re not alone anymore, Murphy. You or Finn. You have all of us, a new family, a pride. You need to let us in.”
He put both hands on the wheel and drove as fast as he could. He wasn’t much of a praying man, but he sent them out now with every mile they drove. Please let us find Finn, and let him be alive. He wasn’t sure what Murphy would do if the worst happened. He wasn’t sure what any of them would do.
Chapter Three
Clara was staring out the window when she heard the rattle of the door again. Logan must be coming back. She waited for his knock just so she could tell him to go away. And why did just the thought of seeing him have her pulse racing again? Instead, she heard a soft, tentative knock at the door.
“Clara, are you awake?”
It was Amia. Clara’s pulse sped up for an entirely different reason this time. There were still so many secrets she didn’t think she could share with Amia—secrets that weren’t really hers to share with Amia. What if she slipped and said something? She could stir up even more trouble for herself. She could hurt Amia and Lydia and… Damn it! She really hated being swamped with uncertainty!
“Clara?” Amia called again, and Clara debated on pretending she was asleep just to avoid being alone with Amia. But that wasn’t who Clara was, and she wasn’t going to start now.
“I’m up,” she called out. As bad as the idea probably was, she wanted to see Amia.
Amia pushed open the door and walked in as if they hadn’t argued the last time they’d been together. Clara tensed, trying to prepare herself for whatever Amia felt the need to say when Amia took the wind out of her with two words.
“I’m sorry.” Amia fidgeted with her pockets, looking uncomfortable.
“What?” Clara asked, unsure o
f why Amia was apologizing.
“For what happened downstairs. I’m the only one you know here. I should have stood beside you,” Amia said, but she wasn’t meeting Clara’s eyes, making Clara question Amia’s motives.
Lord, was she trying to put her own guilt on Amia now? The other woman had come in to apologize, and Clara was reading into it. She was utterly disgusted with herself.
“I let you suffer, did nothing to save you from the Blanes. I deserved to stand alone,” Clara answered.
“No,” Amia shook her head. “I might have thought that when I let pain and emotion influence me. But I know you did what you could. If you had tried to get me, they would have caught you and killed you. You said it, and you’re right. I’m sorry, Clara.”
“Don’t say that. I don’t deserve your forgiveness.” God, if Amia only knew the secrets Clara held inside—secrets that belonged to the only mom she’d ever really known. Clara’s dad had sent Lydia to them. He’d trusted her, and Clara was incapable of not doing the same. Trusting and loving Lydia no matter what the cost.
“It’s mine to give, regardless. And I’m giving it.”
Clara watched as Amia stepped farther into the room and sat cross-legged at the foot of the bed. “We’ve gone about things all wrong. God, you caught us at a rough point. But I’m guessing there will always be something going on here.”
“You mean the tracker they put in you?”
Amia nodded. “Tracker, transponder, whatever you want to call it. I’m lucky they didn’t locate me here. I could have gotten everybody killed.”
Clara saw the horror in Amia’s eyes and moved to sit beside her. “Don’t torture yourself like that. None of this is your fault.”
“I’m a Blane.”
The words softly spoken hit Clara hard. It was like stepping into the past and listening to Lydia finally confess who she was. She’d give Amia the same words now that she’d given to Lydia then.
“You’re just as much a victim in all of this as anyone,” Clara countered. “Probably more so.”
“I wish I’d known you were watching me. It would have been nice to have a friend,” Amia whispered, and Clara felt her heart ache. What would Amia say if she knew Clara had once pretended Amia was her sister?
“I’ve never really had a friend, either,” Clara admitted.
“Really? I just assumed you must have grown up in a pride with lots of others around,” Amia said.
Clara shook her head. “We took in a random stray or two, but most never stayed. I had my uncle, though.”
“And your adopted mom,” Amia added.
Clara swallowed, feeling a little sick at the continued deceit. “Yes, and her.”
“I guess I was envisioning a huge pride.”
“People tend to trickle in and out. We’re a refuge for those in need. Some stay, but most move on eventually. We’ve managed to build a network of sorts, though,” Clara confessed.
“We could really use your help here,” Amia told her.
“I already told Logan I’d tell all of you what I could about the hunters and the Blane family,” Clara said.
“We’re not the enemy, Clara, though I know we’ve done a really bad job of showing you that. I hate seeing you locked in here, looking so sad. Damn it! I’m saying something to Tah about this. It’s not right. You’ve done nothing wrong,” Amia muttered angrily.
“I followed you here, and Reno’s right. I wanted to be found. This might not be what I was after, but I put myself in this situation,” Clara countered. “I let anger rule me when we were talking. I said things I shouldn’t have.”
“The story you told Abby? About the baby?” Amia asked.
“Better to warn her now than to tell pretty lies. Lies don’t save lives,” Clara retorted. She took a deep breath and shook her head. She was reacting with anger again, and that wasn’t how she wanted to continue. Her tone was softer when she spoke again. “I don’t want to see her suffer like that.”
“It wasn’t just a story, was it?” Amia asked.
Clara dropped her head to her chest and closed her eyes as the past come rushing back. “No.”
“What happened?” Amia asked softly. “Who? Was it your mother?”
“My aunt.”
“Did you…” Amia swallowed audibly, and Clara looked up and met her gaze.
“Yes, I saw it happen. My uncle and dad were gone. I was staying with my Aunt Stella. They were expecting their first baby. Uncle Thomas was so excited. He’d croon to Aunt Stella’s belly. It made me laugh to see them.”
“How old were you?” Amia asked.
“Five,” Clara answered. She could still smell the cookies in the air. They’d been baking. Happy and carefree. The next minute Aunt Stella had stilled and told Clara to go to the safe room.
“Did…did they hurt you?”
“No. I was in the safe room. She sent me there, planning to follow, but they were quicker than she’d expected. She never made it.” Clara stood again and walked to the window, wrapping her arms around her waist to try to keep herself from shaking apart. “I saw the whole thing on one of the monitors my dad had installed.”
“Oh, my God. You were only five!” Amia exclaimed.
“The hunter doesn’t distinguish between male or female, adult or child. I’m sure you saw that, Amia.” She turned to glance at the other woman. “Even if you don’t want to believe you did. All they see is the animal. All they feel is a need to rip it out and kill it.”
“Clara—” Amia began.
“Do not tell me you’re sorry. You made the choice to save, Amia. That’s who you are. Not a hunter, no matter your last name.” Just like your mother, she wanted to add, but held the words inside, unspoken. She turned back to look out the window and caught a glimpse of Logan. As if he felt her eyes on him, he glanced up. It was like a jolt of electricity passed between them, igniting a fiery lust inside her that never seemed to die away. She wouldn’t be able to deny him much longer. He was her mate. They were meant to be.
“Were they Blanes? The ones who killed your aunt?” Amia asked.
“Doesn’t matter,” Clara told her.
“Yes, it does.”
“No,” Clara turned and faced Amia with exasperation. “That’s what you’re not getting. It doesn’t matter. All that matters is that it was a hunter. It was a hunter that held her down while another cut her open and ripped my unborn cousin from her womb. It was a hunter who took pleasure in making her watch as they did things to her child no mother should ever have to endure. And it was a hunter who left her there to bleed out and die. It doesn’t matter what their goddamned last names were.”
“Oh, God.” Amia covered her mouth with her hand.
“I know you of all people are aware of the cruelty of hunters. There’s no way you didn’t see it all around you when you were growing up,” Clara said.
“Marcus kept me in the house. I wasn’t allowed in the yard unless he was there. I was kept away from most of it,” Amia admitted.
“Why? Why would he do that?” Clara demanded.
“I don’t know. He just did. I always thought he was waiting for me to betray him the way my mother did.”
Clara quieted, trying to decide how to approach this topic. “How did your mother betray him?” she finally asked.
“I don’t know. I just know she did. No one was ever allowed to speak of her after she died, especially me.”
“She died?”
Amia nodded. “Marcus burned all her stuff. He told me to be good and remember my place or I’d be joining her. I think… I think he might have killed her.”
Clara held her breath. Now was the perfect time to confess the truth. All she had to do was open her mouth and tell Amia the truth
Your mother’s alive. She’s alive and has been living with me this whole time.
But Clara couldn’t tell. She’d given her word to her Uncle Thomas, and he was one person she would do her best not to let down.
“You were t
he first person I saw dragged in by hunters since I was a little girl. Once I saw you, I couldn’t look away. There was something about you that drew me to you,” Amia continued.
“You saw the glow of the animal inside me. It’s a hunter gift, but you’ve used it for good,” Clara said.
“I knew I couldn’t let you die. I made my choice that night. They were getting ready to train me. Marcus and Kellan had some plan to marry me off to Kellan.” Amia shuddered and Clara knew the other woman was imagining what life would have been like then.
“You both have the gift of sight. They probably hoped any children you had would have the same.”
“I don’t care. I’m just glad I got the hell out of there. Betrayal kept Kellan from having me. I’ll take the scars. Seems like a good trade to me.”
“You do realize what this means,” Clara prompted Amia.
“What? You think they’ll still come after me?”
Clara shrugged. “I don’t know on that. It depends on how obsessed Marcus is with you, I guess. I was referring to what it could mean for you and Reno, for the pride.”
“What?”
“You could have the first shifter born with the gift of sight,” Clara said. “Not that we need it to sense who is and who isn’t. But wouldn’t that be a slap in the face to every hunter out there. A shifter born with a hunter’s sight.”
Amia grinned. “It would. It’s almost enough to make me want to have Reno’s baby.”
“You don’t want kids?”
“Not now,” Amia said. “Seeing how much Abby’s pregnancy is taking out of her. God! It terrifies me to watch her getting weaker and weaker every day.”
“Why is she weakening? Is there something wrong with the baby?”
“Not that any of Diane’s equipment shows. Baby looks strong and healthy. But it’s growing so fast. Abby’s body can’t seem to handle it,” Amia said.
“I don’t understand. Was Abby sick before she became pregnant?”
“No. From what she said, she’s rarely ever sick.”
“Then the pregnancy shouldn’t be harming her. She’s taking vitamins?”