Upon returning to the edge of the dance some ten minutes later, she observed some of her suitors scanning the crowd with their eyes, presumably looking for her. She noticed Lord Eversham was amongst them. She enjoyed his company more than most, since she was able to counter her homesickness by discussing Northumberland with him. But even the prospect of his conversation was not sufficient inducement this evening.
Luc was still nowhere in sight. Retreating quickly before she was seen, Clarissa returned to the threshold of the room she suspected he occupied, and opened the door, only to stop dead in her tracks. Luc had Emily Stokes in his arms. Half of her gown was around her waist and she had one leg hitched over his hip. It was obvious, even to someone as naïve as Clarissa, what was about to happen.
Luc looked at Clarissa with something akin to horror in his expression. Emily turned and simply smiled victoriously.
“Clarissa, I…”
“Oh, excuse me.” Clarissa retreated with as much dignity as she could muster and walked away with tears of humiliation burning her eyes.
“Damn!” Luc threw Emily bodily aside and rushed after her.
Clarissa didn’t know where she was going, but couldn’t return to the ballroom in this distracted state. She tore blindly on, opening several doors at random. Had she been less miserable she might have taken in what was happening in those rooms and laughed about it later with Luc. This thought brought her up short. Since when had she fallen into the habit of even mentally sharing experiences with her godmother’s son?
She eventually found the door that led to the terrace, fresh air and solitude. Breathing deeply she tried to think more calmly about what Luc and Emily had been doing and why it should upset her so much. She had known that Luc had an understanding with Emily, because Emily herself had told her as much. That they chose to indulge their passions at a ball was hardly her concern. Luc had looked after her faithfully throughout her time in London and couldn’t have had much time to spare for Emily. Could she blame them for snatching a few moments alone to indulge their passions? Anyway, it was of no import. In spite of Luc’s protestations she would find a way to work with Mr. Salik and escape from this madness.
Clarissa sensed a presence behind her and knew instinctively that it was Luc.
“There you are. I’ve been looking everywhere.”
“I’m sorry to have interrupted you, my lord,” she said, in what she hoped was an even voice.
“You didn’t.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. Even I could see what — ”
Luc rested one hand on either side of the balustrade against which she was leaning, trapping her between his arms. “Emily Stokes came looking for me.”
“Half dressed?” Clarissa snapped, more forcefully than she’d intended.
“That was her doing, not mine. Believe it or not, I was trying to fight her off.”
“Oh, please, credit me with a little intelligence.”
“No, really.”
Clarissa turned and faced him. “It’s of no importance to me, my lord, what you do or with whom. I know you have an understanding with Mrs. Stokes; you need not trouble yourself to deny it.”
He looked horrified. “Whatever gave you that idea?”
“She did.”
“When?”
Clarissa explained, noticing a marked darkening in Luc’s expression as she did so.
“Damn the woman!” he muttered.
“It doesn’t matter,” Clarissa said with a weary sigh.
“Clarissa, it does matter. There’s nothing whatsoever between Emily Stokes and me.”
“But what she said and what I witnessed a few moments ago?”
Luc was in difficulties now. He could hardly explain to the innocent Clarissa the exact nature of Felix’s parties and what had so casually occurred there between him and Emily. He felt ashamed now that he’d been so foxed as to permit it. But hell, no…who was he trying to fool? Up until recently such action had been second nature to him.
“Emily and I are old adversaries,” he said with a casual shrug. “She obviously saw me leave the ballroom with Felix and followed me.”
Clarissa searched his face for the tell tale signs that he was lying, but to her considerable confusion could detect nothing but an earnest entreaty that she believe him. She was surprised to discover just how desperately she wanted to, and how hurt, how jealous even, she’d felt when she saw him so intimately engaged with Emily. But why would he bother to lie if he really did have a tendre for Mrs. Stokes? It was all such a muddle, so she made do with an absent nod, still unsure what to think.
“Thank you for telling me, but it wasn’t necessary to do so.”
“I’m not quite the heartless philanderer that you think I am.”
“Unless you happen to be Mrs. Stokes, perhaps?”
He merely shrugged, managing to look so remorseful that Clarissa grinned in spite of herself. “But, Clarissa,” he said, “why exactly did you come to the library?”
“I wanted to know what you were discussing with Lord Western. I had a feeling it was to do with my situation, and you did promise not to take further action without consulting me first.”
“Felix’s family is in shipping. I simply wanted to know if a ship is expected from Egypt any time soon. I hoped one of the crew might be able to enlighten us with regard to the advocates that drew up the supposed will. I had intended to tell you about his connections this afternoon, but Simms interrupted us.”
“Oh, I see. Well, thank you for telling me now.”
“And talking of Simms, my lady,” Luc said, his face now sporting a familiar predatory grin, “what else were we doing when he interrupted us?”
“I…I don’t remember.” Clarissa was trembling but knew it wasn’t because she was cold.
“Liar!”
Luc pulled her into his arms and attempted to kiss her, but Clarissa fought him indignantly. How dare he treat her like his plaything, especially since she’d just seen him in a similar situation with Emily Stokes? Her resistance lasted all of five seconds. The sensation of his lips, so gentle upon hers, the soft probing of his tongue, the feel of his arms encircling her waist so protectively, was all she could think about. It took only another five second for her to lose the ability to think at all, and with a sigh, she surrendered to the sweetness of his embrace.
“What was that for?” she asked, when he broke the kiss.
“Reassurance.”
“I can’t, I don’t think I ought — ”
“It’s my opinion that you do far too much thinking, and not nearly enough feeling. Don’t think anymore, Clarissa, just concentrate on how I make you feel.”
“I haven’t — ”
“Um, I know.” He grazed her neck with his tongue, sending exquisite shivers down her spine. “But don’t you think it’s time you did? Have you not wasted enough years?”
His eyes regarded her with a deep intensity, and Clarissa understood it was no casual question. The rarefied atmosphere between them was palpable, his masculinity a devastating distraction. Clarissa looked into those somnolent eyes for a long time before replying, confused at first and unsure.
Suddenly the blinkers were removed, and she knew, with blinding certainty, that he spoke the truth. She wanted to know what it was that she had missed for so long, what it was that woke her at night with feelings of intense longing, leaving her feeling empty and unfulfilled. This man in front of her could teach her everything she needed to know. He was standing here, offering to do so, and she wouldn’t decline that invitation.
Thoughts of the possible consequences briefly penetrated her passion-fuelled brain, but were not sufficient to deter her. The one thing she regretted about the non-consummated state of her marriage to Michael was the lack of a child. How dearly she would have loved to be a mother, to have a child of her own to nurture, love and protect. Well, if that should happen as a result of her coupling with Luc, then she would be delighted.
As it was, as soon as possi
ble she planned to return to Northumberland and continue with her life, far away from Luc and his plutocratic peers. Most of her neighbours viewed her with varying degrees of envy and resentment anyway, caused partly by her dismissal of many requests for her hand. She had spoken the truth when she told her aunt that she had no time for socialising, so what would it matter if she was ostracised as a result of her disgrace? She lived a solitary existence and would scarcely notice the difference.
Clarissa nodded slowly, a decisive response to Luc’s question.
“Yes,” she said.
The attraction was simply too strong for her to fight against it. Without blushing she held his gaze. After all, he had no feelings for her. She would simply be another conquest to add to an ever growing list. But he wanted her, for some inexplicable reason, and she intended to take ruthless advantage of that. She had tried to live her life respectably, by the prescribed rules, and what had that achieved? She would grasp the opportunity to live a little with this beautiful roué. Just once. Then she would return home satisfied, her education complete. But of one thing Clarissa was determined: Luc would never know that, against her wishes, against her most earnest resolve and much to her very great despair, she had developed a tendre for him.
Luc placed his index finger beneath her chin and tilted her head up. His finger traced the line of the lips he had just kissed so thoroughly. He cupped her cheek in his hand and smiled so intimately into her eyes that a heady sense of anticipation gripped her and a wave of desire washed through her.
“Soon, sweet Clarissa,” he said, lowering his head to capture her lips. “It’s almost your time. I’ll come to you very, very soon.”
Chapter Twelve
When Clarissa awoke she couldn’t, at first, think why she felt different. Then she remembered the commitment she’d made to Luc, and waited for remorse to consume her.
No such remorse arrived.
Instead, the recollection of her brazen behaviour brought a smile to her lips. She touched them with the tips of her fingers. They were delightfully bruised from his passionate kisses, and she felt the now familiar glow in the pit of her stomach, a raging ache as desire took hold. She hummed to herself, stretched and, for once, didn’t rush out of bed. The day would just have to wait until she was ready for it.
Drifting restlessly through the downstairs rooms much later on, Clarissa anticipated with pleasure the afternoon’s activities. Luc’s mother had arranged for some of the ladies in her circle to spend the afternoon at the orphanage. They would see for themselves the efforts that were being made to save the unfortunate children and hopefully be moved into opening their purse strings wide.
All was organised activity when they arrived, and only Rosie broke away to briefly greet Clarissa before, bustling with self-importance, resuming her task of painstakingly setting the cups in a straight line on the snowy white tablecloth. Clarissa smiled at the sight of Annie tucked securely under Rosie’s arm.
A commotion indicated the arrival of the first guests. Clarissa looked up and sighed in frustration when she observed that Mrs. Stokes was one of the first ladies to enter the orphanage. The woman made Clarissa feel uncomfortable at the best of times, but after what she had observed last night she felt acute embarrassment on behalf of them both.
“Hateful woman,” the countess said, sighing. “I must say, I really don’t care for her.”
Clarissa stared at her aunt in disbelief, having never before heard her utter a single derogatory word about anyone. “Then why did you invite her?” Clarissa asked.
“Oh, my dear, her husband was such a sweet man, and he left her so well provided for. I’ve no doubt that desperation will cause her to give most generously.”
“Aunt Marcia,” Clarissa said, trying not to grin. “I hardly know what to say!”
The countess patted Clarissa’s hand and offered her a cheerful wink. “Don’t act so shocked, my dear. It’s not possible to reach my age and have six grown children of one’s own without knowing something of the ways of the world.”
Eventually all the guests had arrived and taken their seats to watch the little concert the children put on. Clarissa would have been delighted with it all, but for the fact that she seemed destined to trip over Emily Stokes wherever she moved. She had thought that, by sitting beside Aunt Marcia in the front row, she would be safe. But, no…Emily and her companion sat directly behind them.
There could be no doubt of the fact that Emily was going out of her way to cultivate the countess’s friendship. Clarissa watched it all with amusement. Had her aunt not informed her beforehand of her opinion of Emily, Clarissa herself would have been completely taken in by her apparent pleasure at the younger woman’s presence.
The concert began and delighted its audience. After the finale the whole orphanage lined the stage, the smallest children at the front — Rosie with Annie at the centre of it all — and sang their hearts out. The applause was prolonged, and Marcia cast a satisfied glance at Clarissa. The children had played their part to perfection, and the donations were likely to be generous.
“Thank the Lord that’s over!” Clarissa heard Emily say sotto voce to her companion. “What a pack of little monsters. How soon can we get out of here?”
“There’s no rush,” countered her friend. “You can do yourself much good here with his mother. Use your brain, Emily. You know very well that he holds her in the highest esteem. You ought to cultivate her friendship.”
“I suppose you’re right, Mary. But really, it’s asking a lot. I’ll make him pay for his neglect when I have him safely back under my wing.”
“I dare say.”
“And what is that wretched Hartley woman doing here?”
“Shush, she’ll hear you.”
“I don’t care if she does. Oh, Mary, what can he possibly see in her? She has no style, no clothes, no social graces, and have you seen how much she eats? She’s barely able to dance, is far too tall to be fashionable and yet the gentlemen are falling at her far from dainty feet for the privilege of merely conversing with her.” She sighed. “I just don’t understand it.”
“Calm yourself, Emily. She’s new and that always creates interest. Luc will have no lasting interest in her. How could someone such as she hold his attention for more than five minutes? You know his sophisticated tastes as well as I. Don’t worry so! She’ll be gone again soon, and then Luc will come scurrying back to you with his tail between his legs.”
“Huh. I won’t have him.”
“Yes, you will.”
Clarissa could detect a smile in Emily’s satisfied tone as she responded. “You’re right, Mary, I will.” She dropped her voice to a conspiratorial whisper, but Clarissa, eavesdropping shamelessly, was still able to make out her words. “Oh, Mary, I can’t wait. I’ve never met a man that comes close to him. He’s so divinely handsome, and as for his wicked demands, well…” Emily dropped her voice even lower and went into some detail but as the ladies then rose and headed for Rosie’s arrangement of tea cups, Clarissa heard no more. She considered that to be just as well. Clarissa was devastated. Luc had assured her that Emily Stokes meant nothing to him, but it was obvious now that they’d been intimate. Clarissa told herself that she’d known it all along, but still felt ridiculously hurt. She moved with her tea as far away from Emily as possible, determined to hear no more.
Clarissa and Aunt Marcia left soon after that but not before a gushing Emily Stokes promised to call upon the countess later in the week to make a substantial donation to the orphanage.
Luc conducted his business that morning with uncharacteristic haste. He was anxious to see Felix and discover what news he’d obtained with regard to the shipping register.
“You’re in luck, as always,” Felix told him when they met a short time later. “A clipper out of Cairo is already a week overdue. Doubtless either storms or the doldrums will be responsible for any delay at this time of year.”
“But Cairo? Will that help us?”
“Yes, dear chap, because the first mate is, apparently, a native of Alexandria.”
“He could provide the information we seek?”
Felix nodded. “Undoubtedly.”
“Excellent. When can we expect the clipper to make port?”
“Anything up to a two week delay isn’t unusual, I’m afraid.”
“Hum.” Luc stood and rubbed his chin, his mind churning. “Up to another week, at least. I should be able to procrastinate for that amount of time. I’ve no doubt that we’ll shortly receive a message from Twining, anxious to get on with things, but I shall prove unavailable.”
“In other words, you’ll stall for time?”
“Exactly!”
Luc, already feeling the leaden weight of responsibility for Clarissa’s troubles easing from his shoulders, suggested that they take luncheon together at White’s. During the course of the meal, Luc was unaware how frequently he mentioned Clarissa’s name. But the fact didn’t escape Felix’s notice.
“This news of yours is excellent,” Luc said, “because if this ship’s mate can confirm my suspicions then it will save me a fortune.”
“In what way?”
“The only alternative would be to send someone to Alexandria to check out these advocates. That would cause a long delay, and Clarissa would have no peace in the interim. I’m convinced that Salik and Twining are in league, solely for monetary gain.”
“It’s possible, I suppose.”
“It’s the only answer. Think about it, Felix. Twining was well aware of her situation and dragged his feet after her husband’s death, deliberately keeping her short of money. His intention was to wear her down. He knew she trusted him and would carry on running things as best she could. His first objective was clearly to marry her. But he’d already proposed and been rejected once, so this time he was better prepared. He told her that he’d be able to devote all of his time to resolving her problems with Salik.” Luc spoke with withering contempt. “And he would, miraculously, have done so. Once she became his wife and her property was safely in his pocket, that is.”
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