by Shana Burton
“Is she pregnant?”
“Why don’t you two just swing by, and we’ll let the first lady explain it for herself.”
Minutes later, with Kina in tow, Angel pulled her car up to Sullivan’s gated entrance. Lawson let them both in and led them to Sullivan’s bedroom.
Angel squeezed Sullivan’s hand. “Sully, Lawson told us the doctor’s report about Charles. I’m so sad to hear that.”
“There’s still a chance you could get pregnant,” Kina reminded her. “Plus, there are so many children just waiting for a couple like you and Charles to adopt them.”
“It may already be too late for that,” disclosed Sullivan.
“Why, because of the application and waiting process?” asked Angel. “I know that sometimes adoptions take years, but if you go ahead and get on some lists now or start looking into foster care—”
Sullivan stopped her. “It may be too late for me to worry about getting pregnant because . . . I may already be pregnant.”
“Oh my God, really?” exclaimed Angel. “Sullivan, you should be praising the Lord! That’s wonderful news.”
Lawson was bewildered. “Sully, if that’s the case, then what have the long face and the tear faucets been about? Are you afraid something could be wrong with the baby and don’t want to get your hopes up?”
“No, I’m praying to God that I’m not pregnant at all!”
Angel squinted her eyes, confused. “What? Five minutes ago, you wanted a baby with Charles and now you don’t?”
“Yes, I want a baby with Charles, and no one else,” stated Sullivan.
Lawson shook her head. “Sweetie, you’re talking in circles. One minute, you want a baby, the next you don’t. Now you want a baby with Charles, but you’re praying that you’re not pregnant. Just come out and say whatever it is you’re trying to tell us.”
Sullivan moaned. “You know that scripture that says, ‘Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed?’” asked Sullivan.
“Yes, that’s somewhere in James, I think,” answered Angel.
Sullivan threw up her hands in capitulation. “Well, I’m confessin’, and you heifers better get to prayin’!”
Lawson dropped her head. “How did I know another one of your deathbed confessions was coming next? To be honest, I don’t even want to know all the dirty details. Just tell me which side it falls on, illegal or immoral?”
“Lawson, don’t be mean,” admonished Kina. “Let Sullivan get whatever this is off her chest. Remember, the Bible says we are called to bear one another’s burdens. It shouldn’t matter that Sullivan makes us bear more burdens in a week than most people do in a lifetime.”
Sullivan smacked her teeth. “Kina, I’m really too stressed out right now to try to figure out whether you’re trying to insult me. All I know is what I’m about to say may be a little bit shocking and my methods slightly unorthodox, but remember that everything was done with the best intentions.”
Angel closed her eyes. “Sullivan, just so we can be prepared, on a scale of one to ten, how bad is it?”
Sullivan thought for a moment. “Possibly an eleven.” They all groaned and grimaced. “Hear me out before you make those judgmental faces, all right?”
“I probably need to sit down for this,” said Angel, scooting in next to Sullivan.
“What exactly did you do?” grilled Kina.
“Well, I was ovulating. As you know from being a nurse, Angel, there was a very small window for me to conceive if I wanted to get pregnant within that month.”
Angel nodded. “Okay, so what’s your point?”
“With Charles being knee-deep in paperwork, he hasn’t exactly been in an amorous mood when I need him to be, so I helped the situation out,” Sullivan took in a deep breath, “by going to my local sperm bank.”
“Jesus Christ!” sputtered Lawson. “Please don’t tell us that you had yourself artificially inseminated!”
Sullivan chewed on her nails. “Well, it wasn’t exactly artificial . . . and it wasn’t actually a sperm bank.”
“This just keeps getting worse by the second,” uttered Angel.
Lawson shook her head. “Sullivan, please explain what you mean by, ‘wasn’t actually a sperm bank’ and ‘wasn’t exactly artificial’ because it almost sounds like . . . I can’t even say it. The thought is just too crazy, and I know you would never do anything that reckless and stupid.”
Angel gestured her hands toward Sullivan. “Lawson, look who we’re talking about here! Reckless is a way of life for her.”
“Angel, don’t talk like I’m not in the room,” snapped Sullivan. “I’m upset enough as it is.”
Angel exhaled. “Okay, Sully, you’re right. We just really need to hear you say that you had yourself inseminated with Charles’s sperm. As sick as that it, it’s a lot better than the alternative.”
“Which is what?” demanded Sullivan.
“You being inseminated with someone else’s sperm!” answered Lawson.
Sullivan silently looked away, fiddling with the tassels on one of her decorative pillows.
Angel studied Sullivan’s body language. “Oh no! Whenever she’s quiet and fidgety, that means she’s either plotting or she’s guilty.”
“Stop being ridiculous!” retorted Kina. “Sullivan would never do anything like that, would you, Sully? She loves Charles too much, and she would never hurt him that way. Go on, Sullivan, tell them.”
“If you’d stop and look at this thing from my point of view, you’d see that I did it for Charles,” rationalized Sullivan.
“So, it’s true,” concluded Lawson. “You could possibly be carrying another man’s baby.”
“Sullivan, no . . .” The disappointment registered on Kina’s face. “How could you do that to Charles?”
“I didn’t do anything to Charles. I did it for him!” she insisted.
“No, you did this for you, Sullivan!” argued Lawson, pointing her finger at Sullivan. “I don’t even know what to say to you right now.”
“It would absolutely crush Charles to find out,” said Kina. “It would more than crush him, it would kill him.”
“Don’t you think I know that, Kina? I wasn’t thinking about the magnitude of what I’d done. That’s why I’ve spent the last two days praying I’m not pregnant and hoping at least one of Charles’s convalescent sperm was able to beat all odds and make it to my eggs before Vaughn’s did.”
“Vaughn!” spewed Lawson. “You slept with Vaughn of all people?”
“How long having you been sleeping with him again or did you never end the affair in the first place?” questioned Angel.
“It was one time, I swear.” Sullivan raised her hand as if taking an oath. “Yes, I admit I didn’t think the whole plan through.”
Lawson clasped her hands together. “What in God’s name was the plan, Sullivan?”
“It was just some insurance,” detailed Sullivan. “I was desperate, and I knew that Vaughn was moving away and taking all of that untapped sperm with him. It was a shot in the dark, just an added measure to ensure I got pregnant.”
“As ridiculous as this plan of yours sounds, you knew there would always be a chance that it would be Vaughn’s baby,” said Angel.
“Biologically, yes, but he was simply a surrogate. It would be Charles and my baby in every way that mattered.” She sighed. “Of course, now that we know he’s practically sterile . . .”
“It’ll be a lot harder to pass off this bundle of joy as Charles’s,” summed up Lawson. Sullivan nodded her head in agreement.
Kina broke her silence. “Sullivan, I don’t think I’ve ever been this disappointed in you—in anybody! I mean it. This is as low as it gets.”
“Hopefully, this whole debacle never has to be brought to light,” implied Lawson. “She might not even be pregnant.”
“Have you been feeling any different? Any nausea or tiredness? Have you missed a period?” interrogated Angel.
&nbs
p; “I threw up when Charles told me what the doctor said, but that was brought on by the shock of it all. I’m a few days late, but that happens from time to time.”
“There’s only one way to be sure,” said Lawson. “You’ve got to take a pregnancy test.”
Angel shook her head. “This is too big to chance like that. Sullivan, you need to go see your doctor. If he does an ultrasound, he may be able to pinpoint the conception date by the size of the baby.”
“I can’t go to my doctor,” Sullivan objected. “He’s a member of the church.”
Lawson massaged her temples. “This is such a nightmare.”
Angel hopped off the bed. “Let me make some phone calls. I may be able to get you in somewhere.” She walked out into the hallway as she scrolled through the contacts on her cell phone.
“Kina, you’re being awfully quiet,” noted Lawson.
“I just . . . I don’t know what to say. I mean, Sully, you’re my friend, but Charles is my pastor and my boss. How am I supposed to keep something like this from him?”
“You’ll find a way,” commanded Sullivan. “Charles can’t know anything about this, Kina. My marriage would be over, and you know it.”
“How can you knowingly let him raise another man’s baby?” questioned Kina.
Sullivan flung back her comforter. “First off, we don’t know that I’m pregnant. Second, if I am, we don’t know for sure it’s Vaughn’s child. Furthermore, this is between my husband and me. It’s not up to you to say anything.”
Kina crossed her arms in front of her. “What about my duty as a Christian?”
“What about your duty as one of my best friends?” shot back Sullivan.
Lawson interceded. “Kina, we can sort all of that out later. The first thing we need to do is find out if Sullivan is really pregnant.”
Angel reentered the bedroom. “Okay, I called an OB friend of mine. Sullivan, she can see you if you come within the next thirty minutes.”
“She’s not anyone from the church, is she?” inquired Sullivan.
Angel helped Sullivan out of bed. “No, your secret will be safe, at least for now.”
Lawson tossed Sullivan some clothes. “Why does it feel like we’re aiding and abetting?”
“Are you going to have a moral crisis right now?” hissed Sullivan. “If so, we can leave you and your conscience here.”
Lawson shook her head. “I’m already an accessory to the crime. I might as well see it through. It amazes me that I continue to let you talk me into getting involved with shenanigans only the Lord can get you out of!”
“Because that’s what friends do!” insisted Sullivan. “Friends support each other, they’re there for each other. And when necessary, they lie and cover up the truth about paternity for each other!”
“Congratulations, Mrs. Webb. You’re pregnant!” announced the gynecologist after reviewing Sullivan’s sonogram. “Based on the size and position of the baby, I’d say you’re about six weeks along.”
“Did you hear that, Sullivan?” asked Angel, grinning. “You’re going to be a mommy!”
Sullivan sat on the doctor’s examination table and tried to catch her breath. “Really? I’m, like, really pregnant for real?”
“Yes, you are. The first thing you’re going to want to do is make an appointment with your regular OB-GYN. Your top priority right now needs to be making sure you and this baby stay healthy. Your doctor is going to run a series of tests to make sure everything is functioning the way it’s supposed to. In the meantime, I can get you started on some prenatal vitamins, and you can start the countdown to your due date.”
Sullivan smiled politely. “Um, Dr. Oyenugal, is it possible to tell exactly when the baby was conceived? Like pinpoint the exact date?”
“Seeing as how I wasn’t there when it happened, it’s kind of tough to give you specifics like that.” Dr. Oyenugal looked down at her chart. “My best estimate is that you got pregnant around the twentieth.”
Sullivan nodded. “Thank you, doctor.”
“I’m going to let you get dressed while I check on those vitamins for you. Congratulations!” The doctor left Sullivan alone with Angel.
Angel moved to comfort her friend. “Are you okay?”
“Hand me my purse, will you?”
Angel passed it to her.
Sullivan scrolled through the calendar on her phone. “Okay, I had sex with Vaughn on the nineteenth, and with Charles the day before and two days afterward.”
“You’ve been a busy girl!”
“I was on a mission.” She blew out a breath and shook her head. “It doesn’t matter. Either way, it’s going to be Charles’s baby.” She rubbed her hand across her stomach. “You hear that, little one? You’re going to make your daddy very happy, you know that?”
Angel chortled. “Which one?”
“The only one that matters!” snarled Sullivan.
“It’s official,” proclaimed Sullivan when she and Angel reunited with Kina and Lawson in the lobby of the doctor’s office. “I’m pregnant!”
Lawson didn’t make a move. “I’m not sure how we’re supposed to react. Are we sad, are we happy . . .”
Sullivan gave her a reassuring smile. “We’re happy, Lawson.”
“So you’re going to keep it, right?” double-checked Lawson before joining in Sullivan’s enthusiasm.
“Of course, I am. I’ve seen the inside of an abortion clinic enough to last a lifetime,” said Sullivan, lowering her voice. “I’m definitely keeping this baby.”
“What if the baby is Vaughn’s?” raised Kina.
“We will never speak that name again, all right?” issued Sullivan. “We’ll never even think it! This baby is Charles’s . . . It has to be.”
“But what if it’s not?” repeated Kina.
Sullivan huffed. “Did you hear what I just said? This is Charles’s baby!”
“There’s nothing wrong with speaking things that be not as if though they were,” recited Lawson.
“I’m all for speaking things into existence,” affirmed Kina, “but, Sullivan, you can’t pretend like the chances of this baby being Vaughn’s don’t outweigh the chances of it being your husband’s.”
Sullivan rolled her eyes. “Miracles happen every day, or did you holy rollers forget that? God has the power—”
“Please don’t put God in the middle of this foolishness,” argued Kina. “God did not tell you to go out and sleep with Vaughn, and He certainly didn’t tell you to try to pass the baby off as Charles’s.”
“Just shut up for a minute!” squawked Sullivan. “I can’t think with you yammering in my ear like this!”
“Well, you better think fast, sister,” Lawson warned her. “Timing is everything in this situation.”
Sullivan copped an attitude. “You think I don’t know that, Lawson? But I just found out that I was pregnant. Can I have a minute to think about that and be happy and thankful for this new life before you all desecrate it with your doom-and-gloom predictions?”
“You’re right,” granted Angel. “Regardless of how it happened, this is a very special moment for you, and I’m glad we’re here to share it. Obviously, we’re not thrilled about the child’s conception, but if you’re happy about this pregnancy, so are we.”
“Thank you,” said Sullivan. “That’s all I wanted to hear.”
Angel and Kina offered a lukewarm congratulation.
“Maybe we ought to pray for her,” suggested Kina.
“Pray for what, that her sins not find her out?” posed Lawson.
Kina shrugged. “I don’t know. We should pray for the baby if nothing else. This kid is going to need all the prayers she can get.”
“Why, Kina? Because I’m its mother?”
“No, because you’re pregnant, Sullivan! We’ve got to start thinking about and praying for this baby. Now is as good a time to start as any.” Kina grabbed Sullivan’s hand with Lawson and Angel reluctantly joining in. “Lord, we come to you full
of praise and thanksgiving. We thank you that our sins are forgiven through the blood of Jesus. We come now thanking you for this child that Sullivan is carrying. While we don’t know what the future holds, we know that you know the plans you have for us and the plans you have for this baby. You knew this child when she was stitched in her mother’s womb. This baby may not have been conceived under the best circumstances, but, Lord, we know that you can take a mess and turn it into a masterpiece.
“Be with Sullivan as she goes through this pregnancy. Give her the wisdom to handle every situation, Lord. Supply all her needs and her child’s needs, as you promised in your Word. Let her know that you hate the sin, but you love the sinner. Keep your hedge of protection around them. Lord, right now, we also come asking you to watch over her husband and our pastor. Give him the strength he needs. Give him a loving heart toward his wife and new family. Surround him with godly counselors. Bind and destroy all tricks of the devil designated to harm him. Help them to raise this child in love and in the knowledge of you. We declare the baby will be anointed and a soldier in your army. Let him or her be strong, healthy, and a blessing in the lives of everyone he or she touches. We believe that it’s done. We claim it and thank you in advance. In Jesus’ name I pray. Amen.”
“Amen,” echoed Lawson and Angel.
Sullivan was touched. “That was beautiful, Kina. Thank you. I appreciate you putting your personal feelings aside for this child and me.”
“I won’t hold the child accountable for the sins of the mother,” resolved Kina.
Lawson exhaled. “I guess the real fun starts now. Are you going to tell your husband?”
Sullivan nodded. She seemed detached. “I am . . . but not tonight.”
“Why not?”
“Because the baby . . .” Sullivan was unable to finish her thought. The severity of her situation came crashing down on her all at once. Her heart began to race, and she started to frantically search for her car keys. “I need to get out of here. I’ve got to think.”
Angel instinctively reached out for her. “Sully, are you okay?”
Sullivan’s eyes glassed over. “It feels like my heart is about to jump out of my chest. Oh my God, I can’t breathe!” she panted and doubled over to keep from hyperventilating. “I can’t breathe! What’s happening to me?”