Le Juif errant. English
Page 175
CHAPTER LX. THE ORDEAL.
Adrienne de Cardoville and Djalma had remained alone. Such was thenoble confidence which had succeeded in the Hindoo's mind to his firstmovement of unreflecting fury, caused by the infamous calumny, that,once alone with Adrienne, he did not even allude to that shamefulaccusation.
On her side (touching and admirable sympathy of those two hearts!),the young lady was too proud, conscious of the purity of her love, todescend to any justification of herself.
She would have considered it an insult both to herself and him.Therefore, the lovers began their interview, as if the princess hadnever made any such remark. The same contempt was extended to thepapers, which the princess had brought with her to prove the imminentruin to which Adrienne was exposed. The young lady had laid them down,without reading them, on a stand within her reach. She made a gracefulsign to Djalma to seat himself by her side, and accordingly he quitted,not without regret, the place he had occupied at her feet.
"My love," said Adrienne, in a grave and tender voice, "you have oftenimpatiently asked me, when would come the term of the trial we have laidupon ourselves. That moment is at hand."
Djalma started, and could not restrain a cry of surprise and joy; butthis almost trembling exclamation was so soft and sweet, that it seemedrather the expression of ineffable gratitude, than of exulting passion.
Adrienne continued: "Separated--surrounded by treachery andfraud--mutually deceived as to each other's sentiments--we yet lovedon, and in that followed an irresistible attraction, stronger than everyopposing influence. But since then, in these days of happy retirementfrom the world, we have learned to value and esteem each other more.Left to ourselves in perfect freedom, we have had the courage to resistevery temptation, that hereafter we might be happy without remorse.During these days, in which our hearts had been laid open to each other,we have read them thoroughly. Yes, Djalma! I believe in you, and you inme--I find in you all that you find in me--every possible human securityfor our future happiness. But this love must yet be consecrated; and inthe eyes of the world, in which we are called upon to live, marriage isthe only consecration, and marriage enchains one's whole life."
Djalma looked at the young lady with surprise.
"Yes, one's whole life! and yet who can answer for the sentiments of awhole life?" resumed Adrienne. "A God, that could see into the future,could alone bind irrevocably certain hearts for their own happiness;but, alas! to human eyes the future is impenetrable. Therefore, toaccept indissoluble ties, for any longer than one can answer for apresent sentiment, is to commit an act of selfish and impious folly."
Djalma made no reply, but, with an almost respectful gesture, he urgedthe speaker to continue.
"And then," proceeded she, with a mixture of tenderness and pride, "fromrespect for your dignity and mine, I would never promise to keep a lawmade by man against woman, with contemptuous and brutal egotism--alaw, which denies to woman soul, mind, and heart--a law, which none canaccept, without being either a slave or perjured--a law, which takesfrom the girl her name, reduces the wife to a state of degradinginferiority, denies to the mother all rights over her own children,and enslaves one human creature to the will of another, who is in allrespects her equal in the sight of God!--You know, my love," added theyoung lady, with passionate enthusiasm, "how much I honor you, whosefather was called the Father of the Generous. I do not then fear, nobleand valiant heart, to see you use against me these tyrannical powers;but, throughout my life, I never uttered a falsehood, and our love istoo sacred and celestial to be purchased by a double perjury. No, neverwill I swear to observe a law, that my dignity, and my reason refuse tosanction. If, to-morrow, the freedom of divorce were established, andthe rights of women recognized, I should be willing to observe usages,which would then be in accordance with my conscience, and with what isjust, possible, and humane." Then, after a pause, Adrienne continued,with such deep and sweet emotion, that a tear of tenderness veiled herbeauteous eyes: "Oh! if you knew, my love, what your love is to me: ifyou knew how dear and sacred I hold your happiness--you would excuse,you would understand, these generous superstitions of a loving andhonest heart, which could only see a fatal omen in forms degraded byfalsehood and perjury. What I wish, is, to attach you by love, to bindyou in chains of happiness--and to leave you free, that I may owe yourconstancy only to your affection."
Djalma had listened to the young girl with passionate attention. Proudand generous himself, he admired this proud and generous character.After a moment's meditative silence, he answered, in his sweet, sonorousvoice, in an almost solemn tone: "Like you, I hold in detestation,falsehood and perjury. Like you, I think that man degrades himself, byaccepting the right of being a cowardly tyrant, even though resolvednever to use the power. Like you, I could not bear the thought, thatI owed all I most valued, not to your love alone, but to the eternalconstraint of an indissoluble bond. Like you, I believe there is nodignity but in freedom. But you have said, that, for this great and holylove, you demand a religious consecration; and if you reject vows, thatyou cannot make without folly and perjury, are there then others, whichyour reason and your heart approve?--Who will pronounce the requiredblessing? To whom must these vows be spoken?"
"In a few days, my love, I believe I shall be able to tell you all.Every evening, after your departure, I have no other thought. I wish tofind the means of uniting yourself and me--in the eyes of God, not ofthe law--without offending the habits and prejudices of a world, inwhich it may suit us hereafter to live. Yes, my friend! when you knowwhose are the noble hands, that are to join ours together, who is tobless and glorify God in our union--a sacred union, that will leave usworthy and free--you will say, I am sure, that never purer hands couldhave been laid upon us. Forgive me, friend! all this is in earnest--yes,earnest as our love, earnest as our happiness. If my words seem to youstrange, my thoughts unreasonable, tell it me, love! We will seek andfind some better means, to reconcile that we owe to heaven, with whatwe owe to the world and to ourselves. It is said, that lovers are besidethemselves," added the young lady, with a smile, "but I think that nocreatures are more reasonable."
"When I hear you speak thus of our happiness," said Djalma, deeplymoved, "with so much calm and earnest tenderness, I think I see a motheroccupied with the future prospects of her darling child--tryingto surround him with all that can make him strong, valiant, andgenerous--trying to remove far from him all that is ignoble andunworthy. You ask me to tell you if your thoughts seem strange tome, Adrienne. You forget, that what makes my faith in our love, ismy feeling exactly as you do. What offends you, offends me also; whatdisgusts you, disgusts me. Just now, when you cited to me the laws ofthis country, which respect in a woman not even a mother's right--Ithought with pride of our barbarous countries, where woman, though aslave, is made free when she becomes a mother. No, no; such laws are notmade either for you or me. Is it not to prove your sacred respect forour love, to wish to raise it above the shameful servitude that woulddegrade it? You see, Adrienne, I have often heard said by the priests ofmy country, that there were beings inferior to the gods, but superiorto every other creature. I did not believe those priests; but now I do."These last words were uttered, not in the tone of flattery, but withan accent of sincere conviction, and with that sort of passionateveneration and almost timid fervor, which mark the believer talking ofhis faith; but what is impossible to describe, is the ineffable harmonyof these almost religious words, with the mild, deep tone of theyoung Oriental's voice--as well as the ardent expression of amorousmelancholy, which gave an irresistible charm to his enchanting features.
Adrienne had listened to Djalma with an indescribable mixture of joy,gratitude, and pride. Laying her hand on her bosom, as if to keep downits violent pulsations, she resumed, as she looked at the prince withdelight: "Behold him, ever the same!--just, good, great!--Oh, my heart!my heart! how proudly it beats. Blessed be God, who created me for thisadored lover! He must mean to astonish the world, by the prodigies oftenderness and charity, t
hat such a love may produce. They do not yetknow the sovereign might of free, happy, ardent love. Yes, Djalma! onthe day when our hands are joined together, what hymns of gratitudewill ascend to heaven!--Ah! they do not know the immense, the insatiablelonging for joy aria delight, which possesses two hearts like ours; theydo not know what rays of happiness stream from the celestial halo ofsuch a flame!--Oh, yes! I feel it. Many tears will be dried, many coldhearts warmed, at the divine fire of our love. And it will be by thebenedictions of those we serve, that they will learn the intoxication ofour rapture!"
To the dazzled eyes of Djalma, Adrienne appeared more and more an idealbeing--partaking of the Divinity by her goodness, of the animal natureby passion--for, yielding to the intensity of excitement, Adrienne fixedupon Djalma looks that sparkled with love.
'Then, almost beside himself, the Asiatic fell prostrate at the feet ofthe maiden, and exclaimed, in a supplicating voice: "Mercy! my couragefails me. Have pity on me! do not talk thus. Oh, that day! what years ofmy life would I not give to hasten it!"
"Silence! no blasphemy. Do not your years belong to me?"
"Adrienne! you love me!"
The young lady did not answer; but her half-veiled, burning glance,dealt the last blow to reason. Seizing her hands in his own, heexclaimed, with a tremulous voice: "That day, in which we shall mountto heaven, in which we shall be gods in happiness--why postpone it anylonger?"
"Because our love must be consecrated by the benediction of heaven."
"Are we not free?"
"Yes, yes, my love; we are free. Let us be worthy of our liberty!"
"Adrienne! mercy!"
"I ask you also to have mercy--to have mercy on the sacredness of ourlove. Do not profane it in its very flower. Believe my heart! believe mypresentiments! to profane it would be to kill. Courage, my adored lover!a few days longer--and then happiness--without regret, and withoutremorse!"
"And, until then, hell! tortures without a name! You do not, cannot knowwhat I suffer when I leave your presence. Your image follows me, yourbreath burns me up; I cannot sleep, but call on you every night withsighs and tears--just as I called on, you, when I thought you did notlove me--and yet I know you love me, I know you are mine. But to see youevery day more beautiful, more adored--and every day to quit you moreimpassioned--oh! you cannot tell--"
Djalma was unable to proceed. What he said of his devouring tortures,Adrienne had felt, perhaps even more intensely. Electrified by thepassionate words of Djalma, so beautiful in his excitement, her couragefailed, and she perceived that an irresistible languor was creepingover her. By a last chaste effort of the will, she rose abruptly, andhastening to the door, which communicated with Mother Bunch's chamber,she exclaimed: "My sister! help me!"
In another moment, Mdlle. de Cardoville, her face bathed in tears,clasped the young sempstress in her arms; while Djalma kneltrespectfully on the threshold he did not dare to pass.