by Aria Norton
“Follow the path through those trees until you come to a few barns. The one with the green stripe on the door is where she will be hiding. I suspect she’ll be in the hayloft. In that case, there should be a ladder you can use to climb up. Please, be patient with her. She is not used to having her will overruled, but she will learn. Do not judge her on her recent actions; this is not how she usually is. She would give her last coat to give warmth to another if she could. Aurora is merely a little misguided in some of her ways.”
With a nod from him, the nanny left, her back straight as she walked back to the house. She must have been a schoolmistress once. His gaze travelled back to the woods, seeing the path the woman had spoken of. At least now he knew that Aurora was not as childish as she pretended to be. She was far more cunning than he thought, but his new knowledge would definitely help him subdue her. He hoped.
Wasting no further time, he set off, eating up the ground with long strides. He eventually came to the very same barn described, stopping short of entering it.
“I must approach her with caution. I don’t want to upset her any more than I have already.”
Drawing in a deep breath, he let it out as he entered the place, immediately locating the hayloft and the ladder propped against a haystack. She’s probably behind those haystacks lined up. I don’t know of any noblewoman who would climb a ladder and take up temporary residence in such a place. Then again, Aurora was different from other women.
Climbing the ladder, he had to push a few haystacks away from him before he saw a small foot. She’s not wearing any shoes. It made her seem more innocent and childlike, but he knew not to underestimate her. Reaching the top, he found Aurora sound asleep, one arm thrown over her head while the other rested on her abdomen. Her cheeks were slightly flushed, and a few tendrils of hair had escaped and framed her face.
This was the first time Carlos had ever seen her so still, but he was grateful as it allowed him to look at her. His fiancée was beautiful; he couldn’t deny that. From the way her long lashes lay against her plump cheeks to her full form beneath the old dress she wore, he found she was perfect. Her skin looked soft and full of youthful exuberance, so much so that he felt compelled to touch it.
Coming closer, he thought to reach out a hand and caress her cheek, but she chose that moment to open her dark green eyes.
“You!” she shouted, scrambling away from him.
“Don’t be afraid.”
“Afraid? Why would I be afraid of you?”
That was true. All of her actions had proven that she wasn’t in the least bit frightened of him. Although I may be.
“Very well, poor choice of words. Will you come back to the house, please?”
She scrunched up her face. “Why on earth should I listen to you, and how did you find me? Did someone tell you where I was?”
A flash of vulnerability crossed her face. If I tell her that her nanny helped me, she might never trust anyone again.
“I’m good at tracking; that’s how I found you.”
“Why not track your way back to the house again and leave me alone? Better yet, I will leave.”
Carlos immediately blocked her passage. “Wait a moment, Aurora. Can we not at least reach an understanding of sorts?”
“An understanding?” she snorted. “Unless you understand that I do not wish to marry you, I’m afraid there’s no understanding to be had. Now, kindly step aside.”
Stubborn woman. “I am not the bad man you think I am. If only you would–”
She held up her hand. “Do not attempt to explain how good you are, Mr Fernandez. I know all I wish to know about you. You need to know that if you force me to marry you, I will hate you for the rest of my life. You will never live in peace. I would think carefully if I were you.”
With that, she walked past him, down the ladder, and he supposed back to the house. Not for the first time since meeting her, Carlos wondered what he had got himself into.
Chapter 12
Aurora’s belly clenched in a grip of unbridled fear. She could taste bile in her mouth, the acrid taste coating her tongue. Dabbing her damp brow with the back of her hand, she wondered how she could escape her fate. Her wedding day had arrived, and she was no closer to driving Carlos away as she was in the beginning.
“He’s a stubborn man! Nothing I have done has made him run for the hills. What is he made of? Stone?”
What was she going to do? She rocked back and forth on her heels, not caring if her dress was dirtied in the process. Carlos would not care; he had made that abundantly clear. All he wished to do was to make her his wife and receive whatever it was that was driving his need to marry her. There had to be a reason; no man would willingly go through all she had put him through and still wish to marry her. If her very life as she knew it wasn’t hanging in the balance, she might just respect him for his tenacity.
“How could I have lost? I have never lost before. I have driven away countless men, for goodness sake! What is so different about him?”
Was it because he was a commoner? Did that make him a hardier fellow? It had to be something. Gathering her legs up to her chest, she leaned her head on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. What now? If someone had told her a month ago that she would be sitting on her bedroom floor in her wedding dress while preparations were being finalised downstairs, she would have laughed herself hoarse. Never had she expected that someone would succeed in forcing marriage on her.
“I was so confident that I would win as I always do. Failure is a hard pill to swallow.”
It wasn’t so much failure but the fear of going into the unknown. Worry and anxiety had been her companions since the previous night when she realised that she could not escape this fate.
“I am being forced to leave everyone and everything I have ever known. Where is the fairness in that?”
Had her mother been alive, perhaps things would have been different. Mother would have never suffered me to be married to a man I didn’t love, not when she and Father shared such a remarkable love story. It had ended in tragedy, but that did not take away from the years they had been together.
“If my father had just paused and thought about what he was doing, he might have realised that marrying me off is not the answer.”
Perhaps in his own mind, he believed that he was doing the right thing. But had he truly thought about this matter as a father should? Or had society pressured him into making a decision based on the opinion of others?
“Oh, it doesn’t matter now, does it? What’s done is done.”
If she were any other woman, she might have flung herself from the rocks into the sea or poisoned herself. Aurora valued life, but it seemed that this value would be to her detriment.
“I cannot take my own life when my mother died to save mine, but how I wish that it was I who had died. A baby might be mourned for a day and a time, but a mother and wife are mourned for as long as those who survive her live.”
What if the very same thing happened to her? What if she bore a daughter only to die and leave the baby to her fate?
“I would not want another girl child to suffer as I did.”
If she had a boy, perhaps he would be treated better as he would be the heir, but Aurora didn’t want to take that chance.
“But what can I do? My path has been chosen for me.”
Hopeless, she tucked her head between her knees, holding her legs together with her arms. The world around her slowly faded away until all she could hear was her breathing. She didn’t know how long she stayed in that position, but she probably could have stayed like that for several more hours if not for the knock on her door.
Wetting her dry lips, she croaked out entry. “Come in.”
Nanny, Millie, Netty, and all the other female servants filled her room, the dread in their eyes belying their overly bright smiles.
“Is it time already?” she asked.
“No, dear,” said Millie. “We just thought that we’d come and give you a bit of advice
to make this transition smoother.”
“I don’t think anything you could say could make this smoother, Millie. I’m doomed.”
“Oh, don’t say that child,” Nanny gently chided, coming to sit beside her.
“Sit on the bed, Nanny,” she protested. “Or you’ll be complaining about your back.”
“I’ll be fine, child. Besides, this may be the last time I’ll get to sit beside you like this.”
Aurora groaned. “Do not say that. I feel terrible enough that I have to leave you.”
“Do not see it in that way,” said Millie. “This is a new beginning for you, and Mr Fernandez seems to be a wonderful man. See all the clothing he has provided for you? Your trousseau is full of beautiful new items that any woman would feel proud to have.”
What was the use of clothing when she could not have her family with her? Not even all the riches in the world could substitute being with the people she loved.
“I would rather remain here and let him keep all the clothing.”
“Aw, you will make us cry, dear,” Netty complained. “’Tis difficult enough knowing that we’re saying our goodbyes.”
“Then don’t. Cause a raucous, stop this wedding.”
They all hung their heads. Of course, they could do nothing. They were but servants under the rule of others. Aurora felt guilty for making them feel that they should do something when it wasn’t possible.
“Put my foolish words out of your mind. If I could not stop this wedding, how can I expect you to?”
“Perhaps ’tis the Lord’s will that you marry and give us little ones to spoil,” said Millie. “The good Lord knows that I have longed to see your own babe.”
Aurora paled. “Pray, the Lord does not give me any children.”
The housekeeper frowned at first, then gasped, covering her mouth with both hands.
“Oh, my dear,” she cried stricken. “I did not think when I said that.”
Millie appeared truly horrified that she had mentioned something she knew was a subject seldom discussed around her. Aurora stretched for the woman’s hand, patting it.
“Do not fret, Millie. I know ’tis natural for you to want to see my children, but I fear I’m simply not made for children. Perhaps my husband will grow tired of me and send me back home.”
She meant it as a joke, but judging from their non-smiling faces, they didn’t take too kindly to her words.
“Do not say such a thing, Aurora,” Netty scolded. “You are the best wife any man could have. No sane man would ever reject you once they get to know you.”
It would probably be scandalous for a husband to put his wife away, but it would be a relief for Aurora. I would gladly live with the scandal if it meant I could return home. She didn’t say as much because she didn’t want to upset them, but they knew her well enough to guess what she was thinking.
Looking at them, she observed each of their downcast expressions. Everyone is in a sombre mood because of me. I would hate the last moments of my time here to be spent feeling sorry for myself.
Getting to her feet, Aurora held her hand out to Nanny. “Come, we might as well get me ready for this wedding. I have my hair to do, jewellery to put on, and shoes to choose. You are quite right, Millie, Mr Fernandez has spared no cost in buying me all these things.”
Her heart heavy, and her smile tight, she moved to her mirror, picking up her brush as she stared at her reflection.
“Now, who is brave enough to do my hair?”
It must have been all too much for the women because they burst out crying. Aurora whirled around to face them, not knowing who she should console first.
“What on earth is the matter? I thought we were all going to be happy.”
Nanny flapped her hands. “Oh, never mind us, child. These are tears of joy.”
“Then why do you look as though someone stole your last slice of apple pie?”
Nanny was partial to apple pie and became near territorial whenever a new pie was baked. The woman opened her mouth to say something but chose to look away instead, her shoulders jerking. Aurora thought to go to her, but then Netty uttered a loud sob, covering her eyes with her apron as she also turned away.
“What is wrong? Why are you all crying like this?”
The younger maids drew closer to each other, circling their arms around their waists, their bodies huddled together as they stared at her, tears streaming down their cheeks. Millie blew her nose into her handkerchief, clearing her throat to speak.
“Our sunshine is leaving us, child. What else can we do but cry?”
The servants had called her their sunshine for as long as she could remember. Apparently, she had brought life into the house after her mother died, awakening their spirits. Aurora’s heart was just as heavy, and she, too, wanted to join them and cry, but that would get them nowhere. Instead, she ended up consoling them. Going to one woman after the other, she gave them hugs and dried their tears, uttering words of encouragement. Finally, she stood a little away from them, her hands planted on her hips.
“You all seem to think that I will never see you again! I shall come to visit you as often as I possibly can.”
She wasn’t entirely confident about this as Carlos had not informed her about where they would stay. Well, how could he? I have hardly allowed him to speak to me. But now, they would have hours together on their journey to her new home. He will just have to let me visit them. They are my family, after all. They had been the only ones to show her affection and kindness, and it was due to them that she was who she was today.
“Do you truly mean it?” Netty asked.
“Yes,” Aurora promised. “I will do all that I can to see you often. Now, dry your tears and help me with my hair. I hope that someone will be able to assist me with it once I leave. I can barely manage it on my own.”
They wiped their eyes and began to fuss around her until it was time to go down. Aurora felt she couldn’t leave her room just yet, so she asked them to leave her alone for a moment, needing some time to herself. Holding in her despair, she waited for the last person to leave before flinging herself on her bed and weeping.
Aurora snuck a quick look at her groom, almost disbelieving that they were being given in holy matrimony. She looked back at the vicar, glad she had not married him. He was droning on and on about submission and a wife’s place in the household, but his booming voice couldn’t drown out the sound of people sniffing, blowing noses, and crying. One would think they were here for my funeral and not my wedding. She wanted to turn around and give them an encouraging smile but couldn’t muster the energy to do so. Or rather, her head felt too heavy to turn around. I feel like I have lead weighing it down. How strange.
Who had been invited to the wedding? Beyond the servants, she wasn’t aware of who sat behind her. Perhaps my brothers and their wives are here. Was Carlos’ mother here? No, she didn’t think so. Would his mother like her? That remains to be seen. I don’t think she’ll appreciate that I have given her son such a difficult time.
The rest of the ceremony passed by in a blur, and she soon found herself being ushered into the dining room for a celebratory breakfast. People kept fussing about her, but she paid them no mind. She felt somewhat lightheaded, as though she were floating with her feet still firmly planted on the floor.
“How odd,” she muttered.
“Did you say something?” Carlos asked.
Aurora looked at him askew. This was now her husband, the man who would control her life for whatever remained of it. She didn’t feel any different for it, but that would probably come with time.