Putting the Fun in Funeral

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Putting the Fun in Funeral Page 22

by Diana Pharaoh Francis


  I hesitated but then dropped to my knees beside Ajax. He lay awkwardly twisted, his eyes closed. Blood stained his lips and muzzle, and I had to swallow nausea. This was my fault. I’d assumed my knack for calming animals would keep him from hurting anyone. I’d pretended he was an ordinary dog but he wasn’t. He was abused and half wild. And maybe a wolf. Clearly he was dangerous. I also loved him with all my heart. He’d only been protecting me. How could I fault him for that?

  I stroked his head. He was too still. I couldn’t see any evidence of a wound. I bent down. He was still breathing, but his breaths were shallow and sluggish.

  “Oh no,” I whispered and tears ran down my cheeks. “No, no, no. C’mon Ajax, you’ve got to wake up.”

  I pulled him across my lap and hugged him, nuzzling my face in his fur.

  “Wake up. Please wake up.” My voice broke and my chest felt so tight, I could barely breathe.

  Then Damon dropped down in front of me, his legs straddling mine. He rested his bloodstained hands on Ajax. That icy blue burst of light again. It rolled over Ajax’s limp body, enveloping him. The dog kicked and whimpered, his body tensing. His eyes fluttered, showing the whites.

  All of a sudden, he went boneless. The light of Damon’s magic went out. He sat back on his heels, breathing hard, his head hanging down.

  “Are you all right?”

  He gave a slight nod but didn’t look up. “Tired,” he rasped. “He’ll be okay.”

  I’d already given up hope when Ajax’s body went limp. I held him tight against me as if that would keep his soul trapped in his body. It took me a second to process Damon’s words.

  “Okay?” I echoed and now I felt the rise and fall of the dog’s ribs, slow and steady.

  “Needs rest,” Damon said. He gripped the table to help himself up, but he’d only gotten into a crouch before his legs gave out. He dropped back on top of my legs and then slowly pitched over in a dead faint.

  At least I hoped it was a faint.

  I laid Ajax back down and turned to Damon, pushing his legs out straight. I put a hand on his chest. His heart thumped fast against my palm. The answering surge of relief made me dizzy.

  I grabbed the phone and dialed. Jen answered.

  “How are you?” she asked, her voice worried.

  “I need help,” I said. “How fast can you get to the shop?”

  She didn’t hesitate, even though she was probably knee deep in a project. “Twenty minutes.”

  “Bring Stacey and Lorraine if you can. Hurry.”

  I hung up and tossed the phone back on the table. I gathered the torn sheets and folded them into something resembling a pillow and put that under Damon’s head. With the water shut off, I had no way to wash his arm or hands. Or mine. They were smeared with his blood from trying to stanch the wounds.

  I didn’t know what to do with myself. I didn’t know what to do to help.

  Without thinking, I reached out to brush Damon’s hair away from his face. I traced my fingers down along his cheekbone and over the soft bristles of his carefully trimmed beard. Funny, I hadn’t paid any attention to it when he kissed me. Now I stroked my fingers over it.

  Abruptly I yanked my hand back. His blood was literally on my hands and I was petting him? God, I was insane. Psychotic.

  It seemed to take forever for the girls to arrive. Jen rushed in first.

  “Beck? Beck?” she called.

  “In here.”

  She stopped in the doorway. “What the hell happened? Jesus, you’re covered with blood. And Damon too!”

  She dropped her purse and came to pull me to my feet. “Are you hurt?”

  I shook my head. “The blood’s Damon’s. Ajax bit him.”

  “With all that blood, it was a hell of a bite. Did you call an ambulance?”

  “Damon healed himself.”

  She gaped.

  “With magic,” I explained.

  She ran her fingers through her straight, black hair. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

  “There’s no water here. We need to get him back to his hotel so I can get him cleaned up and he can rest.”

  “What happened to the wolf?”

  “He’s a dog.”

  “Sure he is. What happened?”

  “Damon hit him with some sort of magic and it hurt him. Then Damon healed him. That’s what he said before he passed out. I’ve got a feeling neither one of them are going to wake up any time soon.”

  Chapter 27

  We managed to haul Damon and Ajax back to Damon’s hotel. The clerk at the desk eyed us suspiciously as we carried Damon in. Stacey and I had his arms over our shoulders. Lorraine and Jen carried his legs. Stacey beamed a brilliant smile at the clerk and gave a flirty giggle. “We wore him out. Now he needs to sleep off the fun.”

  The clerk rolled his eyes at us and went back to doing whatever he’d been doing. We’d stopped for bottled water and paper towels and cleaned the blood off Damon and me before we came in. I didn’t need anyone calling the police. It would not soothe the detectives’ suspicions of me.

  We dug in his pockets for the key, and once inside, we laid Damon on his bed. Stacey pulled off his shoes. I pulled off his bloody shirt, pausing a scant moment to admire the scenery as I tugged it off. Jen and Lorraine went back for Ajax and laid him on the couch.

  “We came in the side entrance,” Lorraine said when I wondered how the clerk had reacted to the dog. “Now tell us what happened.”

  I’d explained already to Jen, who’d driven me and Damon in his truck. Lorraine and Stacey had put Ajax in Stacey’s Prius and followed.

  I started to tell the story again and then stopped, shuddering. “I can’t do this. I’ve got to clean up with soap and water.”

  I retreated to take a fast shower. I turned up the heat to nearly scalding and scrubbed. There was blood under my nails that didn’t want to come out. When I finally felt clean enough, I got out and dried off and put on a change of clothes. I checked on Damon before returning to the living room. He hadn’t moved. I touched my hand to his forehead. His skin was hot with fever.

  I summoned Lorraine—the closest thing I had to a medical expert. Stacey and Jen came in with her.

  “Should we be worried?” I asked.

  “I don’t know,” she said. “He’s definitely hot, but that could be normal for this sort of situation.”

  “Let’s give him a few hours and see how he’s doing,” Jen said. “Maybe it’s just something to do with using magic.”

  I had to shake my head. The three of them just accepted the fact of magic without batting an eyelash. I was so incredibly lucky to have them in my life.

  “What if he’s really sick?” I asked. “What if Ajax gave him rabies? Maybe we should have taken him to the hospital.”

  I twisted my hands together, remembering the torn flesh of his arm and the wash of blood. My stomach knotted with worry. He looked so helpless. Lifeless. It felt so wrong to see him this way.

  “I tested Ajax. He doesn’t have rabies,” Lorraine said, rubbing between my shoulder blades. “I also vaccinated him. But as much as I hate to say it, he’s dangerous.”

  “He was protecting me,” I protested, whirling around. “He’s been well behaved since I got him except for today.”

  “Today is a big exception,” Lorraine pointed out.

  “You want me to put him down?” The idea made me want to throw up.

  “I don’t want him to hurt you or anyone else.”

  “I don’t— I just can’t.” I stalked away into the living room. I sat on the couch, scooching under Ajax so his head was in my lap. The girls followed.

  I stroked Ajax. What was I going to do? Lorraine was right. He was dangerous. He’d been trying to protect me, but that really wasn’t an excuse. Now that it had happened once, it would happen again. That’s what everybody said. But there was no way I could put Ajax down. Maybe a muzzle would work. I hated that idea. It felt cruel but it was better than euthanizing him. I snorte
d inwardly. Euthanize made it sound clean and clinical. Putting him down was killing him, plain and simple.

  I wouldn’t do it. People do violent things all the time and get second and third and more chances. Why should Ajax have just one strike and he’s out? Especially when he was trying to protect me.

  “You don’t have to figure it out now,” Jen said, sitting on the arm of the couch and eyeing me sympathetically.

  Stacey sank cross-legged into the chair opposite to me. “Any news? Do the police have any idea who hit your place?”

  “No. But Damon said it was done with magic.” I hesitated. I needed a drumroll for the next bit. Sadly, I had to do without. “Also, good news. My mother was really my aunt. She kidnapped me when I was a baby.”

  That dropped all three of their jaws, and they hit me with a flurry of questions. I told them about meeting Mason and what he’d said about Aunty Mommy and my real mother.

  “Those people are seriously fucked up,” Jen said. “Contract babies? That’s medieval.”

  “Apparently it’s also twenty-first century,” I said drily.

  Lorraine just shrugged. “Eugenics really isn’t that big of a deal—if people are willing. I mean, farmers and ranchers have been selectively breeding since they first started growing their own food.”

  “But people?” Stacey gave Lorraine a wide-eyed look of disbelief. “I mean, that’s what slavers did.”

  “Like I said, if the people are willing, I don’t see the problem.”

  “Question is, how willing are they really?” I asked, interrupting before it could turn into a major philosophical argument. “The pressure from the families must be intense.”

  “I sure wouldn’t want to get mixed up in that world,” Stacey said fervently.

  “Me either,” Jen echoed.

  “Beck already is,” Lorraine said, eyeing me.

  I scowled. “I’m not.”

  She smiled crookedly. “I’m not saying you’re going to be contracting babies, but you have a family now—a mother and father and uncle, siblings, and who knows how many others? They’ll becoming to see you, is my bet, and that pressure is going to end up on you too.”

  I snorted. Not that she wasn’t right.

  “You don’t think....” Stacey’s voice trailed away, and she ducked her head, avoiding my look.

  “Don’t think what?”

  She grimaced. “Well. I mean, not that you aren’t amazing and gorgeous and what sane guy wouldn’t be into you, but Damon does come from that world too. Are you sure he’s not just trying to get into your ovaries?”

  I’d asked the same thing of Mason. I tipped my head back, closing my eyes. Would Damon really be that kind of a dick?

  Despite my lack of trust in his kisses, I couldn’t make myself believe it. The kind of man who’d trick me into pregnancy wouldn’t have stuck so hard to his attorney-client commitment to Mason. He’d also have tried a lot harder to get me between the sheets when he was living at my apartment. With that ass and those abs, not to mention the humiliating way my brain dissolved when he kissed me, he probably would have succeeded.

  I opened my eyes and looked at the girls. “I don’t think he’s after a kid, but even if he is, there’s always the morning-after pill.” I didn’t let myself think too hard about whether or not I’d actually take it. The talk of having children unnerved me to no end, but it also gave me a weird little jolt under my ribs. Right. I’d never so much as changed a diaper, much less been responsible for another human being. Ajax was more than enough to keep me on my toes.

  Deciding to change the subject, I told them of meeting the cops and going to Aunty Mommy’s murder scene.

  “You were bombed with gargoyles?” Jen said at the end, eyes wide. “That’s ... ridiculous.”

  “I think Damon might be right,” Lorraine said thoughtfully. “At least about you needing protection. Maybe having Ajax around and ready to fight is a good idea.”

  I latched on to that. “That’s true. He obviously won’t let anything bad happen to me.”

  She smiled wryly. She knew I was only agreeing with her to have a good reason to keep Ajax unmuzzled. I scratched behind his ears and made a face at her.

  “So if somebody in your family destroyed your shop, then who did it and why?” Stacey asked. “Didn’t your uncle say that he hadn’t told anybody else about you? If he’s not lying, then that means that Damon’s either wrong or your uncle did it.”

  “If that was the case, then why come out of the woodwork?” Jen asked. “He could have attacked without Beck even knowing he existed.”

  “And why kill your—” Stacey broke off and tossed her hands. “What do we call the bitch now?”

  “I’ve been calling her Aunty Mommy, but The Bitch works.”

  “Or the Wicked Bitch,” Jen offered.

  “Okay, the Wicked Bitch works for me,” Stacey said. “Why kill her?”

  “Maybe she stole his favorite firetruck when he was a kid,” Lorraine offered.

  “I got the impression that family bonds really matter to him,” I said. “And anyway, even if he did want to kill her, he doesn’t seem the type to drop gargoyles on people.”

  “What type of killer does he seem like?” Stacey asked.

  “I don’t know. Something sneakier, more elegant.”

  “Murder can be elegant?”

  “More than dropping gargoyles with giant penises on his victims.”

  “Okay, I’ll give you that much,” Stacey said. “But it still doesn’t answer who would have gone after your shop or killed the Wicked Bitch. And it’s just as possible they weren’t done by the same person.”

  “Awfully coincidental timing, though,” Lorraine said. “But the whole conversation is pointless since you have no idea who really knows about you and how these new relatives feel about you. Mason and Damon could both be lying, or someone overheard a conversation or who knows? Maybe their computers got hacked or someone’s following them or they talk in their sleep. What’s really important is that you stay safe.”

  “Not that easy when you’re being targeted,” Jen said. “Especially since they’re using magic. Can you do something like set up a magical bubble around you that no evil can penetrate?”

  I smiled. “If I knew how—maybe. But I don’t. What I can do is pretty basic. Well, except for the smoke trick, and I don’t know how to do that one on purpose.”

  I had to explain what that meant.

  “If only you could have done that when the Witch Bitch came after you,” Jen said.

  I shook my head. “I didn’t want her knowing I could do magic, and besides, disappearing wouldn’t have helped. She’d still have gone after you three. Better to suck it up and let her do her thing.”

  “If you say so,” Lorraine said doubtfully.

  “Back to the problem. It looks like someone with magical abilities is targeting you and may have killed the Wicked Bitch,” Jen said. “That means that the police aren’t likely to find the culprit since he or she can just poof! away the evidence. The question is, how are we going to keep you safe and stop this guy?”

  “You could hire security for the shop,” Stacey offered.

  Memory hit me. “Oh shit! Kenny’s coming in. He could already be there and all that blood. He’s going to freak when he sees it. The claims adjuster is coming in too, and the window guy. I can’t afford to cancel.”

  I looked down at Ajax. “I don’t want to leave him. If he wakes up while I’m gone, it could be very bad.”

  “No worries,” Jen said, standing up. “I’ll go clean up the blood and hang out at the shop. I’ll get caught up later tonight.” She was a freelance Web designer and all-around computer geek, which made her schedule very flexible.

  “I’ll go too,” Stacey said. “My shift doesn’t start until five.”

  Lorraine glanced at her watch. “I’ve got to head back to the clinic,” she said regretfully. “I’ll call when I get off.”

  “Call us when they both wake up
,” Stacey said, hugging me. “Or if you need anything, but that goes without saying.”

  Once they were gone, the silence caved in on me. My eyes felt gritty, and my head was full of sludge. All my adrenaline abandoned me, leaving me to feel as exhausted as I was. I wondered how I could reach Mason. Maybe he could help Damon. But I had no idea where to find him. I turned and lay on my side with Ajax’s back against my stomach. His warmth and steady breathing lulled me to sleep.

  Chapter 28

  I woke to feel Damon’s hand stroking my hair.

  “Wake up, Beck. Rise and shine.”

  I groaned and blinked. My eyes felt as if they’d been rolled in sand. Damon crouched in front of the couch at eye level. He’d showered. His hair clung wetly to his forehead. Ajax still slept, his head on the couch between us.

  “Are you okay?” I asked.

  His hand came to a rest, though his thumb continued to stroke back and forth along my cheekbone.

  “I’m fine.”

  “I’m sorry Ajax bit you.”

  The corner of Damon’s mouth quirked up. “He was trying to protect you.”

  I sat up. “That’s exactly it. He was abused by the people that had him, and he’s not a vicious dog—”

  Damon’s finger pressed against my lips. “I know. I saw the news footage when you rescued him and the little girls. I’m glad you have him.” He pushed to his feet. “I’d rather he didn’t bite me again, though.”

  “That was—” I swallowed. I didn’t even know what I wanted to say. The memory of his arm ripped open and blood streaming down twisted my stomach. “That was awful. I’m really so sorry.” I swallowed. “Does it hurt?”

  He lifted his arm and flexed it, twisting it to let me see. “It’s good as new.”

  “Does it hurt?” I repeated.

  “Not anymore.”

  I nodded solemnly. “Thank you for healing Ajax. Especially after he bit you so bad.”

  “He was trying to protect you, so I can’t fault him. I didn’t mean to hit him so hard either.”

  “When will he wake up?” I frowned. “What time is it?”

  “Almost six. He’ll probably wake soon. His body was a little overloaded. He can’t tolerate magic like we can.”

 

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