“Do you want more coffee?” She didn’t even acknowledge what he’d said. He shook his head and sighed.
“No. I’m good. I’m going to take a quick walk around the cabin. I won’t be long.” He dropped a kiss on the top of her head, grabbed his coat and headed out the front door, leaving her alone.
She set the pot back on the coffeemaker burner and turned off the machine. The room seemed so much larger now without John in it. She scrubbed her hands over her eyes, pushing back the tears that threatened to fall. “You’re just tired,” she assured herself.
Pushing up her sleeves, she went to work on the dishes. Work would help keep her mind off her troubles. It always did. She scoured and scrubbed the dishes and pans before wiping down the table and countertops.
When she finished in the kitchen, she made the bed and tidied the bedroom, then she set her sights on cleaning the bathroom. Anything to keep her mind off what was happening between her and John.
Snow crunched under John’s boots, breaking the silence of the morning. Frustration ate at his gut, but he wouldn’t allow it to rule his actions. Topaz was afraid. It was like a punch in the gut when he’d realized it this morning. She didn’t want to talk about a future between them, and it wasn’t because she wasn’t attracted to him. There was no question that they were physically compatible.
So what was the problem?
He was tempted to call one of her sisters and ask, but knew he wouldn’t. Whatever was happening between him and Topaz was private.
His phone vibrated and he yanked it out of his pocket and read the display. He might have known. He thumbed the button and held the phone to his ear. “Yeah.”
“You okay?” His brother’s voice rumbled on the other end. Jake and he had a connection that went deeper than simply being brothers. They were twins and always knew if the other one was upset about something. There was an unspoken communication between them that had helped save their lives many times over their years in the Army and during their time with the Rangers.
John rubbed a hand over the back of his neck and settled against the trunk of a birch tree. “I’m fine.”
“No, you’re not. How are things going with Topaz?”
Jake was the only person he’d told what he was doing. And that was only because it was so ingrained for him to have a backup just in case of emergency. “I don’t know.” Saying the words aloud unsettled him. He’d been so certain if he could just get her away from all the distractions of life he could get her to see that they had something special together. Now he wasn’t so sure.
“They’re complicated women.” John could hear the humor and the underlying strain in his brother’s voice.
“They are that.” He knew that Jake had a thing for Sapphire Jewel and was trying to come to grips with his own feelings. “I’m forty years old, Jake. We’re forty. I know what I want out of life.”
“And you want Topaz.” Jake finished John’s thought.
“She’s the missing piece. What I need for my life to make sense.” He wasn’t quite sure how to explain it. “She quiets the demons, you know? She gives my life focus. Direction. A reason.” Shit, it sounded stupid to say it out loud and he wouldn’t say it to anyone else but Jake. He felt like a pansyass talking about his feelings.
“I know what you mean.” Jake’s quiet response made John feel not quite so stupid.
“Yeah, I guess you do. What a pair we are.”
Jake laughed. “We are at that. But we know how to fight for what we want, how to get around barriers and gain the objective. We don’t give up. Ever.”
His brother was right. He wasn’t a quitter. If this weekend didn’t work, he wouldn’t give up. The main thing he needed to do was uncover why Topaz seemed afraid to talk about a future with him. He couldn’t fix the problem until he knew what it was.
“Thanks, man.” John knew he could always count on his brother to be there for him.
“Take it easy and call if you need anything.”
“Will do. And right back at you.” John ended the call and tucked his phone back in his pocket. He strode toward the cabin, needing to see Topaz. He wanted to kiss her full lips and touch her smooth skin. Mostly, he simply wanted to be with her.
He hurried up the two steps to the door and let himself in. The kitchen area was cleared away, the dishes draining in the rack. He didn’t think the counters had ever gleaned quite so well before. Even the stove was shining in the sunlight streaming in through the window.
From down the hallway, he could hear her humming, and was suddenly filled with the need to hold her in his arms to convince himself he wasn’t losing her. He wiped his boots on the mat and walked silently down the hall.
She was bent over the tub, scrubbing the sides and humming a song he didn’t recognize while she worked. It was the most relaxed he’d ever seen her. He leaned against the doorframe and observed her, paying particular attention to the way the material of her jeans clung to her heart-shaped ass.
As he watched her work, he wondered what it was about this woman that attracted him like no other. Intelligence, obviously—that was a given. She loved her family, was loyal and honest. She had a great laugh and enjoyed going to art movies. She also had a passion for action movies. He wasn’t aware of too many other people who knew her secret vice, but they’d spent many nights during their time together on opposite ends of her sofa with a big bowl of popcorn between them while bombs exploded on the screen in front of them.
As though she felt his eyes on her, she turned around. “Hey. I didn’t hear you come in.” She pushed a lock of hair out of her eyes and offered him a tentative smile.
She was also the most put-together woman he’d ever known. She was wearing jeans, but they had a discreet designer label. And since breakfast she’d slipped on a pair of earrings with stones that matched her sweater. She was also wearing a coordinating bracelet. She should have been high maintenance, but she wasn’t. Dressing that well came as natural to her as breathing.
Most women wore sweats to clean the house, but not his Topaz.
“Want to go for a walk? There’s a stream not too far from here and there’s hardly any snow on the path.”
“Sure. Just give me a minute to finish up here.”
“Take your time.” He enjoyed watching her. A sense of rightness settled over him and John knew that he’d do whatever it took to claim this woman. They belonged together. Whatever objections she had he would find a way to get past them.
As she rinsed the tub, she glanced over her shoulder at him several times. “You can wait in the living room if you want.” He was making her nervous, which wasn’t good, but he wanted her to be aware of him and he couldn’t do that if he wasn’t nearby.
“I like the view from here,” he drawled, looking pointedly at her butt.
A burst of laughter escaped her before she could stifle it and she gave him a mock glare. “I can see I’m not going to get any more work done in here.” She tossed the sponge onto the side of the tub and straightened. “We might as well go for a walk now.”
Topaz came toward him, but he didn’t move and continued to block the entrance to the room. She stopped in front of him, hands on her hips, and raised an eyebrow in question. Damn, she was hot when she went all authoritative on him. He could easily picture her giving that same glare to some supplier and having that person fall all over themselves trying to fix whatever the problem was.
But he was made of sterner stuff.
“You gotta pay the toll, babe.” He pointed at his lips.
She laughed again and cocked her hip to one side. “Is that so?”
“Yup.” He enjoyed playing with her, teasing her. She hadn’t had a lot to laugh about these past months. He liked her smile, the way the corners of her mouth turned upward, and the sparkle that illuminated her golden eyes so they appeared to shimmer.
“Hmmm.” She took a step closer to him and pressed her hands against his chest. She ran them up to his shoulders, teasing his n
ape with her fingers.
“Is the toll expensive?” she asked.
“You have no idea.” His voice was lower than normal, arousal making it deeper, rougher. It took every ounce of strength he had to keep from kissing her. He wanted her to initiate the kiss.
She went up onto her toes and pulled his head toward her. “I think I’m up to it,” she whispered just before her mouth touched his.
There was no doubt in his mind she was up to the challenge. She tasted like mint toothpaste and the faintest hint of coffee. He opened his mouth over hers and devoured her. He’d eaten breakfast, but he was a starving man. And only she could sate the hunger inside him.
His tongue tangled with hers as they both stroked and teased. She moaned and he broke, grabbed her butt in his hands and pulled her into the cradle of his groin. Her mound pressed against his cock, a perfect fit.
He groaned and moved against her as they continued to kiss. With her in his arms, he lost all track of time and place. Whether she knew it or not, the woman in his arms was everything to him.
He ran his hand up her spine and back down again. She made little sounds of pleasure that sparked the growing lust within him, setting it aflame.
It was only when he felt her palms push against him that he found the strength to pull back from the kiss. She stared up at him and licked her lips. He groaned, leaned down and licked her lips for her.
A deep shudder went through her. “I think,” she began. “I think we should probably take that walk now.”
He shook his head to clear it. She wanted to go for a walk. Now. His body was yelling its denial even as his head told him to suck it up and get back in the game.
She pushed him aside and eased by him. Heading toward the bedroom, she glanced over her shoulder. “I think that more than paid the toll. You can put the rest on my tab for future payment.”
A slow smile broke over his lips as he watched her sashay into the bedroom. “Yes ma’am,” he whispered under his breath. He’d thought to tease her, to get her all hot and bothered before they went for their walk.
Well, the idea had partly worked, except he was the one all hot and bothered. Although, he knew the look in her eyes very well and knew she was feeling the effects of their kiss just as much as he was.
Satisfied he’d set the tone for the day, John sauntered back to the living room to wait for Topaz.
Chapter Seven
Topaz gave John a sideways glance before looking back at the path in front of her. Her body still hummed from the kiss they’d shared in the bathroom. She couldn’t believe she’d been brazen enough to tease him about it. John brought out a side of her she hadn’t even known existed. She’d never teased a lover before, or thought about sex as something to laugh about. It was fun and liberating.
The bright sun warmed her face as they walked. The crisp air made her face tingle and the light snow covering the ground crunched beneath her boots. It was the perfect morning for a stroll. Winter was hanging on, but she could practically smell spring in the air.
The woods were quiet but they weren’t silent. Crows cawed and a squirrel scampered up the trunk of an oak tree off to their left. In the distance she could hear the distinct burble of a brook. It was so different from New York and reminded her of the simpler times of her childhood.
“Not too cold, are you?”
She shook her head. “No, it’s not that cold.” In fact, she wasn’t even wearing her gloves. They were stuffed in her pockets along with her hands. She’d wanted to reach out and take John’s hand, but she hadn’t been able to make herself do it.
It bothered her that she was unable to do such a simple thing. Why was she so afraid to reach out to him in such a simple way? She’d had no trouble making love to him last night, or early this morning. Maybe it was because their lovemaking had happened in the heat of passion. Reaching out to hold his hand seemed like more of a commitment.
God, could she be any more messed up about her feelings?
She glanced at him again and sighed. John had been quiet since they left the cabin, the easy humor they’d shared over the kiss in the bathroom gone. She wondered what was on his mind, but was afraid to ask, not wanting to ruin the beauty of the moment.
The toe of her boot caught on an exposed root and she started to fall. She threw her hands out in front to catch herself, but John stopped her descent before she’d done more than stumble. Her boots looked great on a stroll down Madison Avenue, not so practical for a walk in the woods.
“I’ve got you.” He helped her stand upright again and brushed his thumb over her cheek. “All good?”
“Yes.” There was worry in his eyes, but behind it she saw the familiar flames of desire. His leather jacket crinkled beneath her hands as she clutched his shoulders. His gaze narrowed and his nostrils flared.
She had no idea what devil inside her made her go up on her toes and kiss him. It was like baiting a bull with a red cape during a bullfight. She wanted him to lose control.
At first he stayed as still as a statue, unmoving and unresponsive to her kiss. Just as embarrassment started to creep in and she began to pull back, he caught her head between his hands and held her while he devoured her. His kiss was filled with dark passion, with relentless need. As always, her body responded readily to his touch.
She wanted him and she wanted him now.
There were no thoughts of tomorrow and what it might bring. There was only now and the heat that sizzled that arose every time they touched.
“Topaz.” Her name was a tortured whisper on his lips. His hand skated down her back to her butt. He lifted her against his erection and ground his pelvis against her.
She had to touch him, had to feel his hard, hot flesh beneath her hands. The zipper of his jacket posed no problem and she slid her hands inside, shoving it down his arms. He released her long enough for her to push it off. He was wearing a long-sleeved shirt and she simply thrust her hands beneath it.
His body jerked when her cool hands hit his hot skin. The man was always so warm, so irresistible to her.
While she’d been busy removing his jacket, he’d opened her coat and now slipped his hands beneath her turtleneck sweater, finding her lace-clad breasts. His fingers closed around the mounds and he moaned deep in his throat. “I love your breasts, so full, so perfect.”
He took a step forward, forcing her to move backward until her spine connected with the broad trunk of a tree. John leaned down, shoved her sweater up and covered one nipple with his mouth, sucking on it through the delicate fabric of her bra. The tight nub stood at attention, the combination of the heat from his mouth and the cool air on her skin ratcheting her arousal up a notch.
This was crazy. They were in the middle of the woods and there was still snow on the ground. Plus, they were out in public. She had no idea how close they were to other people. Knowing John, not very close. He was a man who valued his privacy. But still, she wasn’t the type of woman to take these kinds of chances, to be this wild and impetuous.
He shifted his mouth to her other breast, wringing a moan of pleasure from her, and she forgot all her objections, all the reasons why this wasn’t a good idea. Her panties were damp and the familiar longing grew within her. “John.” She groaned his name as he sucked hard and used his tongue on her straining nipple.
“Right here. Right now.” He pulled back and yanked down the zipper of her jeans and tore open the button.
His sense of urgency fired hers and she found herself agreeing, even helping. She shimmied her hips and he pulled her jeans down around her knees, taking her panties with them. Cool air hit her bare butt and her pussy and she shivered.
Her boots prevented her clothing from going down any farther. John swore and spun her around so she was facing the tree. “Bend forward.”
A blast of heat beat back the cold when she realized what he wanted to do. She placed her hands on the rough bark of the tree and leaned down. Behind her, she could hear the sound of a zipper. Fabric moved o
ver fabric and then she felt the hard, hot head of his cock pressed against her opening.
John swore and pulled back. “Condom,” he muttered. She felt exposed and vulnerable just waiting for him, yet every nerve in her body tingled in anticipation.
The crinkle of the foil packet sounded extremely loud to her ears, unnatural amidst the sounds of nature.
“Done,” he muttered. He caught her hips in his hands, positioned his cock at her opening and pushed inward. There was no pause, no hesitation as he pushed past her body’s natural resistance until he’d seated himself to the hilt.
She felt deliciously stretched as he invaded her, giving no quarter. She squirmed, trying to take him even deeper. It was a tight fit in this position and there was slight discomfort as her body adjusted to his, but it hurt so good.
He pulled back until only the tip of his cock was lodged in her pussy. Then he slammed home again. She arched her back and cried out.
He froze. “Topaz?”
“Again,” she moaned. God, she needed him to fill her, to drive out all her insecurities and misgivings. All she wanted to do was feel.
His hands tightened around her hips and he drove into her over and over, pushing them both closer to the edge of oblivion. Around them the sounds of the forest grew quiet until all she could hear was the sound of their heavy breathing and the occasional groan of pleasure. He shifted and the snow scrunched beneath his boots.
She should have been cold, half-naked as she was. But she was hot, burning with need.
John banded one arm around her waist and reached his free hand down between her legs. His thumb grazed her clit, setting off a series of small explosions in her core. She cried out and then caught her breath when he pulled her away from the tree, so she was standing upright with his cock buried deep in her pussy.
The position made his cock seem even larger and she wasn’t sure how he fit inside her. The pressure in her groin grew with each passing second until she knew she couldn’t hold out any longer.
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