by Rue Volley
She called after me, “Don’t forget to talk to your friends, Harper!”
I offered a nod and kept going down the front steps while chewing, skipping, and jumping along the cobblestone and then out onto the sidewalk. I glanced up at the house and caught sight of a shadow in my bedroom window. It nearly tripped me up, but I’m sure it was one of my brothers. My parents chose to homeschool them. I don’t blame them. They’re heathens.
I shirked the thought of them being in my room and headed to school with one thing in mind—beating the bell.
Chapter Three
I stood in front of the school and glared at it. I’m a freshman now. Middle school was easy, high school not so much, especially for freshmen. We’re targets, but so far, I had been lucky. Maybe I’d slide through without notice. I hoped for that more than anything.
I’m good at blending in, stepping aside—remaining invisible.
I grabbed the strap of my backpack and held on tight. We’d been out of school for Summer Break, and soon we would enjoy Fall Break, too, even though Fall arrives early here. Our summer is so mild it’s basically Fall Jr. No complaints.
I had done the unthinkable and stopped talking to my friends before school ended and then kept to myself all Summer, but I was upset over the boy thing, and I also didn’t feel that great. A terrible virus swept through town at the end of the school year, and most of the faculty was out, as well as students. I got sick, too. Everyone in my house did. I remember bits and pieces of it, but nothing substantial. That’s what fevers do, they distort everything, and that virus packed a severe punch with fevers that hovered around one hundred and three for days.
But anyway, back to the traitors, a.k.a. my friends.
They had all abandoned me, one by one. Court first, then Oliver, then my GG. It hurt more than I wanted to admit. I didn’t know what they’d say to me now, or if they’d say anything at all. It’s funny how you can grow up with people and be their best friend one day and a stranger the next. I wonder if that’s what being an adult is all about? If so, I’ll skip it because it sucks. People should never abandon each other. If you care about someone then you’ll make the time to be with them. Anything else is a lie. Even long-distance relationships survive, so there’s no excuse for someone who lives in the same town with you. It’s just laziness and cruel.
But were they really to blame, or was it a case of Middlings mucking everything up?
I really should stop trying to find excuses for them.
We were supposed to do this together. They promised. So, did I. We stood there in a circle, holding hands, saying a blessing as witches often do, and we vowed to stick together, especially in high school—well, that and way beyond. FOREVER was the word that was said.
And FOREVER is what I expected. But here we are.
Things change, I guess, and not always for the better.
I sighed. “Just go, Harper. Get in and get out unnoticed.”
My mom’s words kept echoing in my mind. She didn’t want me to be alone, and maybe I should be the one to take the proverbial high road—but would I always be bitter? If I do this, if I reach out and try to make things better, well, will I be left with a terrible ache in my gut and subconsciously despise the three of them forever? Or will it just be a temporary fix for something that’s already broken?
I overthink. I can’t help it. I always do that about things I care about. I’d love to say that it’s a blessing, but really, I think it’s a curse.
A big, old sucky curse.
Besides, I did nothing wrong! I never went anywhere. I’ve been right here, waiting like an obedient dog for their owner to come home. I guess I should be grateful that I have my books. At least I can always count on them to comfort me—to be my friend when others fail me. This is why I don’t want to rely on Middlings, and that hurts my heart to put my closest—or what I believed were my closest friends—in that category. But they are, right?
They left. Not me.
They abandoned me without a word.
Like ghosts.
I took one step and felt a bump to my side, then a gentle shake. Arms had suddenly wrapped themselves around me. I stumbled back and saw GG staring me down with that huge smile. She had aged a bit. Her once rounded face was now thinner, but still pretty. She was always pretty in a classic sort of way. Pale, as most of us are here in Juniper Hollow.
I said nothing. I don’t even think I remembered to breathe. Here she was, acting like nothing had ever happened. Like she didn’t flip a switch and go from being my GG—my best friend to a stranger, or one of three—but still, we have a history. I hate that. History keeps you stuck in place sometimes when you know you should run.
My mind raced.
She was my first recess buddy in kindergarten. She held my hand first, hugged me first—stayed at my house first. There was a time when we were inseparable. Same hairstyle, same clothing—before I decided to dress the way that I do now—same everything. We even wrote letters back and forth. Long ones. We talked about everything: our dreams, our hopes, our crushes. We devised a plan to change our names and move overseas to meet and marry two of our favorite pop singers.
It was that kind of friendship — oceans deep.
And here she was. She was looking older, with that smile on her face.
Smiling. Like nothing ever happened. Like I hadn’t felt my heart breaking or cried a thousand tears. Smiling.
“OMG, if it isn’t Harper J. Ellis. How are you feeling?”
The nerves tugged at the edge of my lip, making me look more upset than anything. I wanted to turn without saying a word. I wanted to hurt her like she had hurt me, but my feet wouldn’t move. Her smile began to fade, so I reached out and took her hand before the anger could stop me from doing it.
It felt strange but necessary. It saved what little grin she had left. I was just happy that she was alone and not settled under Ben Burr’s arm. He was the boy who stole her away from me. Turned her against me. He isn’t her type anyway. He’s all about sports and cars. Plus, GG Burr? That doesn’t even sound right. I wanted to ask where he was, but I skipped it. I was afraid if I said his name, then he’d magically appear like some demon, breaking everything again.
I fought back the bitter words and tears and instead choked out something mundane and complacent. I’m neither, but this is how love can make you do stupid things.
“Hey—better,” I said, punctuated by a nagging little cough.
She squeezed my hand as I stared deeply into her eyes. I had missed her. Everything about her. “I was sick, too. It sucked,” she added.
I took in the scene. No Ben—no problems. “Yeah, it did,” I replied, trying my best to settle right back into some normality. GG was a constant in my life. Like air and water. I hadn’t spent a single day without her—until that Middling came along.
My eyes lowered. She shifted her weight onto her other black glittery boot. I almost complimented her, but I refrained. “So, about this Summer.” She paused.
Unease snaked through me. “It’s okay.” It was a disgusting lie. I wasn’t okay. I hadn’t been okay for quite a while. What she did—what they all did—was wrong. Just wrong.
She shook her head and leaned in for a hug while whispering in my ear, “I’m sorry.”
The words melted the frost surrounding my heart. I swear if she weren’t hugging me then I would’ve dropped to the cobbled sidewalk. I closed my eyes and every good memory of her flooded my mind. All the smiles, hugs, kind words. All the letters, slumber parties, and giggling. She loved to braid my hair. Loved it. I wouldn’t let anyone else do it. I prefer curls, but for her I’d accept almost anything—even this. Even accepting two little words that seemed to hold so much weight. I hugged her tighter, hoping she’d never let me go again. Details flooded in. It’s the reader inside me.
GG Gardenstate is cute, the nicest of my friends. We sometimes call her GG for short. GG is my height, maybe five-three, and built like I am, very petite. She has soft haz
el eyes, pale skin, freckles across her nose, and dark hair, nearly black. She loves to dip the ends in different colors, right now it’s purple. She’s silly at times, but always compassionate to a fault. I expect her to become a nurse because she’s so nurturing, or maybe a mom to a couple of little kids who look just like her. But not until much later in life, like when she’s thirty, so we can have time to do more stuff together.
Oliver Millhousen is always sarcastic, super funny, and fashionable, which has nothing to do with his sexual preference. His family is like the rest of ours, founders. Our lineage goes back to then the town was founded in the 1700s. He’s the tallest among us, topping out at nearly six feet. He’s all leg, like a swimmer. Thin, but eats like a horse, which is annoying. His hair is dirty blonde, and he has pale blue eyes, like his mother, and he’s a little darker than I am, but his cheeks are always rosy in color, like Santa Clause. It gives him a jolly look like one of those kids on the vintage ads for anything.
Then there’s Court Barrington, who is the most aggressive out of the four of us. She has long red hair, like fire, and beautiful amber eyes. Her freckles are lighter than GG’s, but still there across her cheekbones. She’s athletic both in attitude and build and can tumble with the best of them. She’s also a cheerleader, which made us nervous at first, but after she started to cheer and still came bouncing up to us afterward—well, we knew it changed nothing. I honestly think she only did it to eat up some of her boundless energy. She’s loud, too, and never ever backs down. I envy her.
“Hey, you.” I turned to see Liv standing there in a black button-down shirt. He reached up and adjusted his white tie. Out of everyone I guess he matched me the most. Very goth, very slick. He had cut his hair. It used to be shoulder length, but he kept it nice and straight. Now it was cut short on the sides and longer on top. It suited his face but made him look more mature. I wondered if I may look older, too, but I hadn’t noticed any changes. Odd.
His eyes ran the length of me. “I see you’re still rocking those amazing dresses.”
I nodded just as Court stepped up in front of me, in her black and white cheerleading outfit, complete with a high and tight ponytail, that matched the red devil mascot on her chest.
“So,” she said.
“So,” Liv spoke for me. I wish he hadn’t. I can handle her.
She glanced over at him but was quick to lock her fiery gaze back on me.
The awkward silence was killing me, but she broke through it by rushing in and wrapping her arms around me. The hug nearly knocked me down.
She giggled in my ear. “I missed you.”
She stepped back, and I shuffled my feet. Court isn’t one for showing emotions, so the fact that she said she missed me really mattered. She took me in. “And girl, that dress? Totally on point. It’s new, right?”
She wasted no time before snapping her fingers and spinning on one foot. She headed for the door, and we followed her inside. I wanted to stop, maybe run as kids rushed back and forth, but no one seemed to be staring, which was a good thing.
We must be the most awkward crew that had ever been assembled.
But my crew just the same.
My friends.
And I love them.
Chapter Four
“Talk,” Court said as she bit into the end of her carrot and chewed like a rabbit. She had it gone before I could even speak.
Liv glanced around the library. His hands sat rested before him on the wooden table, fingers intertwined as his eyes sparked with whatever he planned on adding to the conversation.
“I swear, I will leave and never tell you another juicy secret again.” Court began to stand up, and he unlaced his fingers and held his hands up.
“Wait—just wait.” His tone lowered to a half-whisper, so Court sat back down with a triumphant smirk on her face.
GG rolled her eyes and leaned in. “Honestly, Court, you’re a brat.”
Court's eyebrow cocked, and head swung. “Just like everyone else sitting here at this table.” Her ponytail had shifted from one side to the other with her attitude.
My eyes lowered to my lap as a giggle escaped me. She was right. We may all be different, but the one thing that bound us together was our need to be extra.
Each of us were just that—very extra when it came to everything.
“The tea,” Court added with a tap to the table.
Liv sighed and then leaned in, so we all mimicked him until we formed a tight circle. “We got to second base.”
“Oh!” GG yelped, and I glanced over at the librarian, who seemed to be wholly engrossed in her romance novel. I can relate.
GG leaned in with a not-so-innocent grin. “So, groping, huh?”
Liv started to blush. “Well, a little. But the kissing was amazing. His lips were so soft, and he tasted like peppermint.” He sighed. “I’ll never hate Christmas again.”
I felt uncomfortable. This wasn’t something I could discuss with him or any of them. I had never kissed anyone, although I had experienced a million kisses in my books. I know it wasn’t the same, and for the first time, I was sort of sad about it. I wanted to feel that way. I wanted that first kiss and all the butterflies that come along with it. I wanted that—spark.
My mind wandered back to the mysterious boy in the cemetery. His eyes, his mouth. The way he looked at me. I felt the blood rush to my neck and face. I hoped I wasn’t blushing, but I assumed I must be. It angers me that a Middling could do this to me. A mortal boy, although exceptional.
Liv touched my arm and effectively knocked me out of memory.
I parted my lips. He was right there.
That boy.
The only boy who had ever held any interest for me outside of a book. That fact only made him far too special for me to mention. A problem, really. Dangerous. I both love and hate that I keep thinking about him. It seems unfair. I’m sure nothing will ever come of it, and I’ll be left here to fantasize about him. But sometimes fantasy is much better than reality. I mean, he could be a total jerk, right? With that hair and those eyes. Of course he was. There’s no way that a boy who looks like he does would be interested in me. Me. Harper J. Ellis. The girl who likes books better than people and loves to read them in the cemetery. Not to mention I look like a Victorian doll.
I’m strange and unusual. Just like Lydia. Just like I like it.
Court snapped her fingers. “No—she isn’t a go-to on this. Tell me more—and no offense, Harper, but unless something happened this summer then you’re just not—”
“I met someone.” I had interrupted her out of a need to feel included, but immediately regretted it.
Now all eyes were on me. My least favorite thing and yet somehow it felt soothing. Needed.
Court leaned forward, lowering her head, and took my hand in hers. “Um—skinny?”
“Sort of,” I confirmed with a grin.
Court scowled. “You know what I mean. Information, girlie. All of it. Every single bit. I want hair color, eye color, height, weight—what was he wearing—or is it a he?” She paused. “is it a she? A girl? Did you meet a girl?” She seemed so excited. I can’t say I didn’t enjoy the attention after missing all of them for what seemed like forever.
I grinned through the words. “No—I mean, it wouldn’t matter, but no—not a girl.”
“I think you’d be a lovely lesbiana,” Liv added.
The glimmer in my eyes grew brighter. I missed this back-and-forth.
GG sighed. “That sounds like a Harry Potter spell.” She waved her hand around and enunciated the word. “LES-BEE-AHNAH.”
Court let out an exasperated sigh. “Will you two knock it off, already?!”
I decided to go in a different direction. For some reason, Killian felt personal, although he shouldn’t. I don’t know him, so it shouldn’t bother me, but I just wanted this secret for a few seconds longer.
“Well—I did a lot of reading this summer. Actually, I finished that series! You know, my favorite one.�
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Liv perked up. “Oh yeah—with what’s his name,” His fingers raked the air above his head. “—with the hair.”
My jaw tensed. “He’s more than just hair.”
He squinted. “Aren’t they all just hair and pouty lips—and pale skin, of course?” His mischievous grin curled the edge of his lip. “Tell me, was he brooding?” His eyes sharpened along with his words. “Because they all do that, ya know? Brood and tell you next to nothing. It’s a trick to draw you in and keep you there.”
Court took him in at a glance. “Someone sounds bitter. Did you get dumped, Liv?” The line between Liv’s brow deepened.
GG chimed in with absolute disinterest for Liv’s textbook assumptions and Court’s prodding. “Oh! Yeah—the vampire one, right?” Court shook her head and covered GG’s mouth. I could hear the mumbling behind her hand. She narrowed her eyes and locked them on me. “No—don’t get off track by listening to these two.”
I sucked on my bottom lip then released it. Liv tilted his head. So, I decided to talk about it, even though there wasn’t much to tell. But it was my story, and they seemed riveted. I rarely want any attention at all, but with them I did. I craved it. It had been way too long since we had been together like this, talking—gossiping—being close.
I cleared my throat as lightly as I could. The ache still lingered. “As I said—I read a lot, and I was reading in the cemetery, finishing my book, in fact—I had just finished it, and you know how that is. I was emotional, wrecked really. I was in the worst state of mind.” They all leaned in closer like they couldn’t hear me. “I—well, I must have been talking out loud, and that’s when he spoke to me.”
Liv nodded. “And—what did he say?”
I swallowed hard as they all stared at me. Clearly boys are our new thing. “He asked me a question, so I freaked and chucked my book at him, but luckily he caught it because if I had damaged it, well—I would’ve died.”