by Lisa Olsen
“Ah… sure.” I hadn’t given a whole lot of thought to where he would stay and we explored a few options. He didn’t want to infringe upon my space, and I knew he’d want somewhere quiet and dark, so the couch was out of the question. In the end we settled on the hallway closet, despite my misgivings. Nelo assured me that it was just what he wanted, nice and cozy with very little light, and curled up beside the vacuum cleaner like a cat. Satisfied he’d found a comfortable place to crash, I returned to the kitchen to find Sam pouring himself another drink.
I’m afraid I don’t remember a whole lot of what happened after that. I know there was a lot more alcohol involved, and some serious conversation about the sea. As in, the creatures of the sea and how they fit into God’s plan, according to Sam. Like I said, I’m fuzzy on the details. I know there was singing at one point, and that Sam possessed a very fine tenor voice. I remember telling him all about my time in Midian and that there were tears standing in his eyes at one point. Whether it was because of Raum’s treatment of me, or my vivid recollection of my time with Adam… I don’t rightly recall.
Somehow or other I stumbled into my own bed well after the rise of the sun, only after tucking Sam in on the couch with strict instructions not to go anywhere while he was the least bit drunk. Falling into bed, I had no fear of Azazael or Raum. My thoughts ran more towards a certain dark haired angel, replaying that last kiss over and over in my head.
As I drifted off to sleep, my mind spun fantasies of our happily ever after. By day I would be the best bartender I could be, and by night I could travel the world with my fallen angel, or at least a fair approximation of it, in the Ether. It wasn’t perfection, but I was more than happy to settle for it, as long as we could see each other on a regular basis.
So it wasn’t much of a stretch of the imagination for me to find myself in the Ether when I finally let go of my hold on reality. And I wasn’t alone.
Chapter Fourteen
When I opened my eyes, I had to squint at the bright sun overhead. Even with my floppy hat and sunglasses, the light was strong enough to make me blink. Lying on a lounge chair, I wore a red bikini with a multi colored sarong knotted around my waist. I recognized the beach right away, I’d been there a zillion times as a kid. The pier on the right looked just as I remembered it, teeming with tourists. The sand was littered with small clusters of people, their bright towels and bathing suits peppering the beach with a riot of colors. Still under the fog of too much to drink, I watched the colors blend and shift with the movement of the ocean.
“Oh good, you’re awake.” Adam lay next to me, stretched out on a lounge chair, frosty margarita in hand, tiny black Speedos on his lean form. Not my usual cup of tea, but he pulled it off. “Good job on the setting by the way, I could get used to this.”
“I hate this place,” I murmured, eyes sweeping over the sand.
“You do? Who hates the beach?”
“It’s not the beach itself that I hate, it’s this particular beach. I haven’t been here in a long, long time.”
“Okay, what do you hate about this beach then?”
The world around us shifted and flexed as I exerted my will over our surroundings. “Do you see those adorable kids over there?” I pointed to where a little boy and girl industriously dug in the sand, the girl ordering the younger boy around for the serious undertaking.
“Yeah, I see them, so what?”
“That’s Matty and me, we’re trying to dig a hole to China.”
“So, beyond being a little misguided when it comes to geography, I repeat, so what? It looks like you’re having a good time.”
“We are. We’re having a great time.” Despite the unpleasant memories, I couldn’t help but smile as I watched us play in the sand. Matty was so starved for affection he’d do anything I asked of him, fetching and carrying without complaint, just to be included. I hadn’t always been the nicest to him, especially when I had other friends to hang around with. But sometimes, like the day we watched, we got along great.
“I’m waiting for the light bulb moment here, but you’re not helping me out. Why do you hate this place?”
With a sigh, my gaze shifted, searching for and finding the source of my bitterness. “Do you see that big, fat piece of… work? Over there under the striped beach umbrella?”
“Yeah, the one who’s asleep?”
“Passed out. It’s just past noon and he’s passed out, completely drunk.” I wrapped my arms around my knees as my eyes narrowed in focus on the sight of my father, snoring in the shade. “He stayed passed out all afternoon, and Matty and I got second degree burns over most of our bodies.”
“Ouch.”
“We didn’t know any better, it was something my mom usually thought of, but she had to work that day. I put sunscreen on us when we got here, but we went in the water and I didn’t think…”
“Of course you didn’t, how old were you?”
“Seven.”
“So, how could you know? You were a little girl.”
“He yelled at me that night, for being so stupid. For not taking care of my little brother. For him having to pay for a visit to the urgent care.” Lost in the memory, I was unaware that our surroundings were shifting, people disappearing until the beach was deserted except for the two of us. “That’s why I’m such a slave to sunscreen I guess. I never stopped to think about it.”
“It’s not something I’ve ever had to worry about.”
I looked over at him stretched out comfortably under the sun; he was a little pale but not unappealingly so. “You never use sunscreen, even when you come to the beach? I thought you said you love beaches.”
“I do, I just don’t worry about damage from the sun. Even if I did get sunburn, it’d be gone in a couple of hours.” He shrugged, and I wondered if the same would hold true for me. It’d be nice not to have to worry about that anymore, though I’d probably keep putting it on out of habit. Just in case. “Is your dad still around? Back in California?”
Pushing myself up to my feet, I shook the sand from the sarong and pulled off the floppy hat. “I don’t want to stay here. Can we go somewhere else?”
Adam was on his feet beside me in an instant, lacing his fingers through mine. “Change it then, we can go wherever you want.”
“How about your place?” I’d often wondered where he lived. I was under the impression he had homes all over the world.
“My place… fair enough. Hold on then.” Wrapping an arm around my waist, he pulled me close as the air shimmered and blurred around us. I lost my balance at the sudden shift, falling against his sun warmed skin. “Here we are, my place. Well, one of them at any rate.”
I stood next to a huge, four poster bed of dark mahogany. The room was done in soothing tones of taupe and cream, which complimented the dark wood of the floor and heavy furniture. The minimalist pieces of art on the walls looked like they were picked out by a designer; there were absolutely no personal touches in the room whatsoever. The view from the floor to ceiling windows showed me a city skyline, but I wasn’t sure what city it was from my vantage point. It could have come straight out of a decorator’s magazine for million dollar apartments. Adam wore an expensively tailored tuxedo, open at the throat with the casual grace of someone well used to wearing the best. Instead of my red bikini, I had a red cocktail dress with a plunging neckline, and five inch heels, putting me more at eye height with Adam, my hair loose around my shoulders.
Trust Adam to transport us directly to his bedroom. Just as suddenly I realized I had no idea if it was really Adam with his arms wrapped around me, or if I’d been opening up about my past to Azazael in disguise. I pulled back to study his face carefully. “How do I know you’re really you?”
“I know one way to prove it to you.” He leaned closer, stealing a kiss and I froze, not in the most romantic mood until I knew who exactly I kissed. He acted like Adam, smelled like Adam, tasted like him… but paranoia kicked into overdrive. With a flick of the wrist
, a sword appeared in my hand, very similar to the one he carried but a bit smaller, more feminine (if such a word could be applied to a sword), and I brought it to his neck.
“I’m serious, how do I know you’re not Azazael?”
His eyes went wide as saucers as he felt the cool steel pressed against his throat and he backed off. “Waffles, waffles, okay? You can drop the hardware, I’m really me!” I moved the blade away from his skin, more relieved than I could say at hearing his silly new safeword. “Where’d you get the nifty sword?”
“Oh, I don’t know, it’s the first thing I could think of. Pretty neat, huh? Too bad I don’t get one of these in the real world. That would have come in handy against the demons. I might not have had to go to Midian at all.” I willed it away, a slow smile stretching across my face once I knew he was my Adam.
“Yeah, speaking of that, give me one good reason why I shouldn’t throttle you for coming here.” His hand caressed my throat lightly before his lips traced the same path. Any response I had in mind fell right out of my head under that tender assault, and I only belatedly realized he’d asked me a question when he pulled back to receive my answer, his eyes blazing bright.
“I thought you’d be happy to see me,” I pouted, disappointed he’d stopped with his lazy exploration once we finally were completely alone.
“I’m pretty sure I gave you specific instructions to stay in Midian. Or did you forget?”
“I couldn’t stay there,” I frowned, pulling out of his embrace to walk to the bank of windows. I thought we were in Chicago, but I could be wrong.
“We talked about that. You agreed…”
“I didn’t agree to let Raum keep hurting me. You said he wouldn’t do that if I gave him what he wanted. Yeah, that turned out to be the opposite of what I should do,” I laughed bitterly and he was instantly at my side, turning me to face him as he searched my face carefully.
“He hurt you? What did he do?” His face was dark and thunderous as he checked me for signs of physical damage.
“Relax, nothing permanent,” I showed him where just the faintest trace of red marred my skin from Raum’s bite. “It still hurt like hell though,” I swallowed uncomfortably. “And he wasn’t gonna stop the next time, I could tell by the look in his eyes. He said my fear made me taste better. He said…” I didn’t get any further because Adam gathered me into his arms, crushing me to his chest, all signs of his usual sarcasm gone.
“I’m so sorry, Mercy. I wouldn’t have left you if I’d thought he would try something like that. But I should have known, I should have protected you.”
“It’s okay, I’m fine now. Just… you can see why I couldn’t stay there, right?” I wanted him to tell me it was alright, I’d done the right thing, but when I looked into his eyes all I saw was anger. Was he mad at me for trying to protect myself? What was I supposed to do, wait for him to swoop in and save the day when he was good and ready? Only when Adam spoke again I could see the anger wasn’t directed at me at all.
His arms fell away as he stalked across the room. “Christ, no matter what I try you still end up getting hurt,” he muttered darkly and I chased after him, scared to death he might leave in his current state of agitation.
“You’re not a psychic, Adam. There’s no way for you to predict what the future will bring. Why don’t you stop trying to anticipate every little thing and let’s just try and live our lives?”
“You’re drunk,” was all he said, as he kept me from breaking my neck when I lost my balance on the ridiculously high heels.
“A little,” I allowed, though I only felt pleasantly buzzed from my overindulgence with Sam.
“More than a little. Mercy, you’re completely missing the point of my staying away.”
“As near as I can tell, I stand a much stronger chance with you at my side than apart. And if that brings some unwanted attention from the God Squad… at least we’ll have some time together, right?”
“You don’t know what you’re asking me.” Adam pressed his forehead to mine and I could feel the indecision within him.
“I’m asking you to let me love you. That’s all. Is that so wrong for me to want? To be with you?”
“It’s a sin…”
“Since when has that stopped you?” I scoffed. Adam was the epitome of what it meant to be a fallen angel. I knew he hadn’t lived like a monk for the past two thousand years or more, far from it. Considering the fact that he’d propositioned me within five minutes of meeting him, I knew sin wasn’t the taboo it was for someone like Sam.
“Since it cost me everything I loved.” Adam pulled back to look me in the eyes and I was lost to the power of that brilliant gaze. “I can’t lose you, I won’t survive it this time.”
“Then don’t lose me, stay with me. Let yourself have a little happiness, let yourself love me.” My lips brushed against his, entreating him to let me in.
“I do love you, Mercy. God help me, but I do…” His fingers sifted through my dark hair, thumb tracing over the curve of my cheek in the lightest caress. “I’ve been fighting it tooth and nail, but you get that it’s mutual, right? I’m not much of a hearts and flowers kind of guy, but I promise you this - I will always love you more than any other man ever has, or ever will. You can count on that.”
It felt like it was the first time I’d ever heard the words before, or maybe it was just the first time I really understood them. He loved me. With every fiber of his being, enough to give me a part of himself, enough to sacrifice his own happiness with the hopes of keeping me safe. It wasn’t a line to get me into bed or get me to drop my guard. Adam loved me, and I basked in the glow of that love. Eyes shiny with unshed tears, I opened my mouth to tell him I didn’t need flowers, I didn’t need anything but him, but I never got that far. Instead his lips crashed against mine, stealing the breath from my body at the intensity of the passion I found there.
After my initial surprise, I returned his kiss fervently, lips parting to accept him. Finally, after everything that kept us apart, I was free to love him as I had in steamy dreams. Pressed against the length of his body, I barely noticed as he urged me backwards towards the bed, until the backs of my legs hit the frame and I wobbled on those heels again. I felt his rumble of laughter through my whole body as he lifted me, light as a feather, gently laying me down atop the huge bed and stretching out beside me.
All too happy to follow along with that course of action, my fingers went to the buttons of his shirt, placing a soft kiss on every new strip of skin I revealed. At the same time his talented hands skimmed over my body, slowly dragging down the zipper on the back of my dress and slipping inside to stroke the bare flesh he found. Either one of us probably could have willed away our clothes in the Ether with a single thought, but this was better, this was right. Our lips barely parted during the slow exploration as we learned the curves and hollows of each others bodies, except to part for a sigh or groan of delight. I wanted to touch him everywhere at once, and Adam tried his level best to do the same, too long deprived of the simple pleasure. A faint glow bathed both of our bodies, our Grace reacting to each other in a hint of what was to come.
“You are so beautiful…” Adam murmured against my neck, breath fanning across my moist skin after placing an open mouthed kiss there.
“So are you,” I breathed, wrapping my hand around the back of his neck possessively, craving that contact as I brought my mouth to his again. Our touches grew more insistent, kisses hungry as the last of our clothing was discarded, nothing between us but the feel of his fevered skin against mine. My hands continued their exploration of him, sliding over his smooth, taut body, subtly urging him to take a position above me, but Adam had an agenda of his own.
Heedless of the havoc he was playing with my body, or maybe it was his intent, Adam resisted my hint that I was ready. Instead he proceeded to show me with clever hands and mouth what ready meant. In response I pressed myself along the length of his body as I returned his kisses, hands fisti
ng in the cool sheets as he drove me crazy with need. “God, Adam… please…” I pleaded with him finally, not quite sure what I asked for, but knowing I couldn’t stand teetering on the brink like that for much longer.
With a quick shift he was above me, his eyes holding mine as he took me in one long stroke. The breath left my body in a sigh of pleasure at that welcome invasion, and for a long moment, I forgot to breathe. Forgot there was anything in this world but the two of us and the exquisite joining. My head fell back against the bed as he started to move, limbs parting to accept him completely. My body sang under his attention, moving against him in a perfect counterpart, as though our bodies were built only for each other.
“God, how I’ve wanted this, wanted you…” he groaned, his voice tight with need.
“Always want you… always love you…” I pledged, rapidly losing control over my responses, breath coming faster, until I tumbled over the edge and I forgot to breathe altogether, teeth scraping against his shoulder as I bit back the first cry of pleasure. Still deep in the throes of my own peak, the moment his Grace kindled mine I cried out almost in alarm as I was catapulted even higher, the pleasure so keen I thought at one moment my heart might burst. I felt him stiffen above me as he felt it too, eyes widening in surprise as a dazzling glow suffused our bodies, our Grace bathing us with a warm, tingly energy as we came down from the shared experience.
There were no words. We didn’t need them as he kissed me tenderly, still tingling all over, a drowsy patina of satisfaction coloring our movements. Adam looked down at me with half lidded eyes, brushing the hair from my face. “Are you okay?” he asked finally.
“Better than okay,” I sighed. “Something that good should be illegal.”
Relieved, he rolled onto his back, bringing me with him. “I’m pretty sure it is illegal, genius. Hence the whole fallen angel bit?” he chuckled, earning him a playful punch to the shoulder.
“That’s only forbidden with human women, remember? I’m not human anymore, I’m something new.” For once I was happy to embrace that quality and the uncertainty of my future if it gave me a chance to find happiness with him. Maybe things did happen for a reason? It was a cinch I’d never find anything like that with someone else, as far as I was concerned, we were M.F.E.O. There was just one thing I didn’t understand. “Why is it illegal though? Whatever happened to ‘God is love’?”