He kissed each tear falling down my face. “It’s never going to be the same, you know that. She’s still your best friend. Talk to her and she’ll understand. We don’t ever have to be around alcohol. I told you I have no interest in drinking, so you have nothing to worry about. We’ll try our hardest to not be around it, but it’s bound to happen sometimes, it may be hard at first, but remember it doesn’t have control of you anymore.” I was a recovering addict before graduating high school. That was just sad.
I shook my head a few times. “No,” I sniffled. “I no longer have a best friend, and I’m all alone in this sober, lonely world.”
“What about me?” he asked, holding my face and I looked into eyes that matched the ocean we’d earlier been admiring.
“What do you mean?” I asked, not breaking our eye contact.
“I honestly don’t think you’re losing Daisy as a best friend, but if you feel that way, what about me? I’d like to think I’m your best friend.”
I ran my finger under my eye to capture any loose tears. “You’re my boyfriend, you can’t be both.”
“And why the hell not?”
“Because best friends share secrets, laugh with each other, and have sleep-overs. Boyfriends can’t do that.”
He chuckled. “You kidding me? I know every single thing about you, your secrets, your annoying, but cute habits, everything. You spend more time with me than you do anyone. I know what weird shit you like to eat, what you’re allergic to, what shows you like to watch, and how your lower lip trembles when you see a homeless person standing on the corner begging for money. I know how your body tenses up when you’re nervous just like it did when they brought up drinking. And we pretty much have a sleepover every night. Baby, I know you, and that’s what a best friends is; someone you can trust, and someone you can confide it. Best friends can be friends, lovers, girlfriends, anything. As long as they’re your number one, anyone can be your best friend. You’re my best friend. When something good happens or I need to talk to someone, I don’t reach for the phone to call Cody or Ollie, it’s you. You’re my go-to. You understand me. You’re my lover, my soul mate, and my best friend.”
“Wow,” I whispered, pausing, still taking in his words as its truth sunk into me, “You’re right. You’re my best friend.”
He kissed me again, and I melted into his touch. He always seemed to make my pain go away. His presence made everything better. He made everything better. “Damn straight. Do you think we should make bracelets with our initials and paint each other’s toe nails?”
I pushed his shoulder and laughed. “Sure, do you want pink or purple polish?”
“It doesn’t matter, just make sure you give me lots of glitter so I can sparkle like your vampire boys.”
I laughed and fell backwards onto the soft mattress. “I really don’t want to go back out there. I’m embarrassed.”
He knelt down to drag my sandals off my feet, tossed them onto the floor, and began messaging my feet. “They don’t think you’re any of those things. If you want, I’ll go out there, get your food, and tell them you’re not feeling well. It’s no biggie.”
I leaned my head back and groaned as his fingers kneaded at my heel. “What about you?” I asked, leaning up on my elbows to look down at him. “I’m not going to make you sit in here with me when you could be out having fun. Just because I don’t want to doesn’t mean you can't.”
“Are you fucking kidding me? You think I’d have more fun out there?”
“Uh yeah.” There was a TV and a bed in there, that was it. Outside that door, there was the beach, games, alcohol, and fun.
“I don’t give a shit about bouncing balls into a cup of beer. That’s not my idea of having fun. I have fun when I’m with you. So if you’re out there on the beach with me, hell yeah, I’m having fun. I like everyone out there, sure, but I came here to spend time with you. I’d sit here and watch the paint dry on these damn walls if it's with you.”
I made myself comfortable on the bed. “I still feel bad.” This was his spring break, too, and I was ruining it.
He lifted himself up. “Don’t feel bad for letting me do what I want to do, and that’s to spend time with you. Do you want to go out there and eat or I can bring you something?”
“I should probably go out there, I don’t want to seem like a major rude bitch.”
I followed him into the kitchen. Everyone was sitting at the table talking as the scent of pizza wavered through the air, causing my stomach to grumble embarrassingly.
“I saved you a seat,” Daisy said, pulling out the chair next to her and patting it. I gave her a smile as I grabbed a slice of pizza, threw it down onto the plate, and clasped a drink in my hand while Dawson did the same.
My presence didn’t change anything. They kept talking and didn’t look at me any differently. No one asked what was wrong with me. They just minded their business. I understood why Daisy had fallen in love with these people. They weren’t making me feel like I’d just run out of the room like a crazy person, even though that’s exactly what I’d done.
“So I think we’re going to hang back tonight,” Dawson said, wiping cheese off the side of his face with a napkin. “We’re both exhausted as hell from the drive down.”
“I know what you mean, man, and yours was longer than ours,” Keegan said, nodding in understanding. “No worries, we have a whole week here. I’m sure we won’t be doing too much anyways tonight.”
“Yeah, we can all hang out tomorrow,” Daisy said, smiling at me.
We helped clean up after dinner and they headed outside. “You want to go into the living room to watch TV or bed?” Dawson asked.
“I’m drained,” I replied, falling into his arms behind me and resting my head against his chest. “I think bed is calling my name.” He laughed, moving sideways, and tucked me into his side as he led us back into the bedroom.
I grasped the featherweight comforter in my hands, pulling it down, before collapsing onto the bed. I snuggled in tightly, feeling the soft texture wrap around me like a cocoon, and stretched my legs against the crisp sheets.
“You changing?” he asked, rummaging through his duffle bag.
I shook my head and I let my hair down. “I can sleep in these,” I replied, referring to the sweats and tank I’d thrown on after my shower. “I’m too exhausted to undress.” I took my bra off underneath my shirt and tossed it across the room, causing it to land at Dawson’s feet as he slid his shorts off.
He looked down at my bra, leaned down and grabbed it, before holding it in front of him in display. “This might be my new favorite,” he said, winking. “I’ve yet to see this one.”
I laughed. “I don’t think you’re ever going to see or remember, every piece of undergarment I own.”
His light eyebrows raised and his eyes lit with a twinkle of mischief. “Is that a challenge?”
I bit the bottom of my lip before allowing a slow smile to build across my face. “That just might be, Mr. Thomas.”
He grabbed the top of his shirt and pulled it over his head, his hair getting messy in the process. My gaze promptly went to his chest as he pulled down the blankets and crawled in beside me.
“God, I could stay like this forever,” I said, curling into his side, winding my arm around his waist, and positioning myself, so I could peek up at him. He kissed the top of my head. “The beach, you, not hearing Derrick’s video games blaring in the background, this is perfection.”
“I’m not complaining,” he replied, resting his hand on my back before massaging it in circles.
I took a deep, calming breath and silently gave myself a pep talk for what I was about to do. “How about those rain checks?” I asked, grinning flirtatiously up at him. I was trying to appear casual, but my heart was beating rapidly. I had a hunch in the bottom of my gut that tonight was going to be the night. Tonight was going to be the night we had sex. We were alone, not having to worry about my parents, or Derrick barging into my bedro
om. I could hear the faint melody of music playing outside, so we wouldn’t have to worry about the being quiet part. The music would drown us out.
I’d lost count of the number of times I’d attempted to seduce him into having sex with me. I’d tried everything and wasn’t above using the power of persuasion with food, lip pouting, or even lingerie. But he’d hold back, insisting we needed to wait until I was ready, which pissed me the hell off, because I was constantly assuring him I was. Unless he’d developed skills to talk to my vagina, I was the only one who knew my hormones and what I wanted. And that was to have sex with him.
I wanted to experience everything with Dawson. I wanted to know what he’d given to the girls before me. I ached for the experience of his naked body moving against mine before he’d slowly slide into me and we’d become one. My body throbbed with need of him erasing the last, and only, guy I’d ever been with. I needed him to wash away Reese’s existence.
“I can do that,” he whispered; almost low enough that I didn’t hear him. My mouth flew open. Was this really happening? I stayed silent, waiting for him to say something else, and confirm I wasn’t dreaming. “As long as you’re certain that’s what you want.”
My pulse pounded, and my legs tingled as I abruptly pushed up from him, a loud grunt emerging from his chest, and straddled his hips in one hasty motion. I wasn’t giving him the chance to change his mind.
“Really?” I asked, unable to hold back the excitement in my voice. This was happening. Oh my God, this was finally happening. I was nervous. I was overwhelmed. I was happy. Panic and eagerness swept through me like a sea of emotions.
His eyes zeroed in on me and he smiled. “Yes, baby, really. And I think we’ve got a few rain checks to make up for.”
I nodded, biting down on the edge of my lip and planting a knee to each side of his waist before grinding on him slowly. His fingers latched onto my hips tightly, doing a belly lean, and I yelped as he flipped us over, so I was on my back.
“You sure this is what you want?” He asked, hovering over me.
I grinned, tingles barreling up my spine. “I’m positive.”
He didn’t argue. He didn’t say anything. Instead, he kissed me. I tried to catch my breath as he grabbed my tank top and pulled it over my head swiftly. He kissed me harder, pushing his erection against my tenderness, as I withered underneath him, feeling sensations everywhere our bodies connected.
He pulled back, lifting my legs, as I wiggled out of my sweats and he took my panties off with them. He yanked the blanket away from us and threw it down onto the floor. “I’m going to see all of you,” he rasped, his attention focused on my body, before gently gliding a finger against my skin, like he was worshipping me. His palm slid against every inch of my body. It felt like it was my first time ever being touched, and I was experiencing something new. I melted against the sheets, my body feeling weightless and relaxed, as his mouth replaced his hands.
My head fell back when I felt a single finger descend to my inner thigh, drifting between my legs, and then slowly slide inside of me. My back arched off the bed, when he added another finger, curling them together against me. I shut my eyes, everything around me evaporating, until I suddenly gasped. I snapped up, my breath catching, and found his head ducked in between my legs. The first lick was the most crucial. It was something new, something we’d never done before, and felt incredible.
He took one lick, paused, and then three in succession, like he was playing a game with his tongue. I shut my eyes again, falling head first into the feel of him sliding his wet tongue in and out of me.
I tensed up and slowly rotated my pelvis in circles to meet his mouth until I couldn’t take it anymore. I lost all my inhibitions, but still needed more. The muscles in my pelvis tightened, begging to be released, as my entire body clenched, and a giant wave of pleasure took me under and sunk me in.
He took a few more licks, before pulling himself up slowly, and looking at me with a shit-eating grin on his face. I cleared my throat. “Well, that was nice,” I said, chuckling awkwardly. “Uh, thank you.”
His face went serious, and he looked at me nervously. “Really, did that feel okay?”
“Did you not just see me act like I was going to orgasm my brain out?”
He laughed. “Just wanted to make sure. That’s my first time, you know,” his words drifted off, and he looked away flustered.
“You’ve never gone down on a girl before?” I asked, perking up, my voice shocked and enthusiastic. The thought of being his first at anything excited me. He shook his head and I grinned. He didn’t give me the chance to revel in my happiness because his mouth was replaced with the head of his cock.
“You ready?” he asked.
I nodded nervously. He grabbed his erection and slid it back and forth against my opening. “Mother fucker!” He said suddenly, his hand stopping.
“What?” I asked.
“Fucking condom.”
“I’m on the pill,” I said quickly. I’d been on the pill for years for irregular periods.
“I know, but you never …” he started to pull away, but my hands grabbed his ass.
“Quit stalling,” I said, irritated. “I’m not changing my mind. I’m not letting you change your mind, so if you don’t have sex with me right now, you’re going to be dealing with one pissed off woman.”
He didn’t say anything, instead he down at me, his face calm, as he entered me slowly. It was uncomfortable at first, but he kept his eyes on me as he paced himself. He moved in and out of me unhurried, and every stroke felt better than the last as I adjusted to his size. I thought his tongue was incredible, but him inside of me, there were no words.
“Does that feel good, baby?” He asked, bending down and kissing me slowly, his tongue darting into my mouth, matching the rhythm of his strokes. His hands slid into mine, pulling them up above my head, and he interlaced our fingers. He went deeper, and deeper, until he filled me completely. I wanted him to stay there forever and never take this feeling away.
“God yes,” I groaned. “Please …. please don’t stop.”
“Never,” he grunted, his mouth moving to my neck, gentling biting it, and then nibbling on my earlobe. I groaned. His mouth, his thrusts, his hands were making every part of my body explode simultaneously.
He patiently waited for my release, covering my mouth with his as I moaned out in pleasure, and relished at the feel of him inside of me. He picked up his pace, his strokes faster and shorter before he grunted, breathing deeply, and collapsed onto his elbows, giving me the weight of his sweaty body. His forehead rested gently on mine before moving his mouth to my neck, and then to my ear. “That was amazing,” he whispered. “That was so fucking amazing, baby, you have no idea.”
“Oh, I think I do,” I said, regaining control of my breathing.
He slowly lifted himself off of me, walked into the bathroom, and came back with a warm washcloth. I winced as he wiped the sensitive area between my legs tenderly, and got back into bed.
“So now we can do this all the time, right?” I asked, snuggling into him.
His chest moved as he laughed. “I’ve created a monster.”
Tessa
I looked up from my laptop sitting next to the stack of textbooks, to find my mom pulling out a chair across from me and sitting down.
“I have something for you,” she said.
“What is it?” I asked, setting my pen down next to my Calculus notes. It was the last week of school, which meant finals, or hell week. I’d changed my classes back to the college credits like I’d planned, so I’d been spending every second studying. I was positive I had the material down, but I could never be too prepared. I’d be cramming until the teacher handed out the tests.
She rummaged through her purse and pulled out a large, white envelope, before slowly sliding it across the table. My stomach flipped as I looked down at the packet addressed to me. I looked at her in shock and then back at it. No, it couldn’t be. I gr
abbed the wafer-thin envelope, examining it in my hands to make sure it was real.
“How did you get this?” I asked.
An eager smile spread across her face. “I called them, told them you never received your letter, and they were happy to send you another,” she explained. Her crimson red lips grew wider as she squirmed in her chair.
I used my hands to straighten the envelope, smoothing out every wrinkle, before tracing the emblem in the left corner with my hands. Months ago, I’d destroyed an exact replica of it. It did nothing but remind me of my broken plans. It reminded me he wouldn’t be there with me. I didn’t want to know what was in it. I’d tossed it into the trashcan because I didn’t see it in my future anymore. I hadn’t decided what my plans were after graduation, but my parents agreed I could take a year off if I wanted.
I took a deep breath. “Let’s see what we’ve got,” I muttered, snatching it up quickly before I changed my mind and ripped it to shreds.
“I figured you’d be in here studying,” Dawson said, strolling into the kitchen in his work uniform. He was picking up every shift he could, sometimes even pulling doubles after school, because he wanted to save up for his own place. I insisted he could stay with us for as long as he wanted, but he’d shake his head and say that wasn't the future for him. Fear terrorized me every time we’d had the conversation. I knew Dawson would never leave me, but I didn’t understand why he wanted to move out so badly. I’d gotten so used to him being with me, it wouldn’t feel like home without him.
I got a whiff of garlic and cheese when his lips smacked into my cheek and he sat down beside me. He placed an order of breadsticks and cheese to me. “I figured you probably were too busy to remember to feed yourself,” he said. “Time for a break, baby.”
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