by Liza Kline
“You’re right. Maybe I’ll try it on.” Kerri had a growing pile of dresses to try on while I still hadn’t found a single one.
Kerri and I were complete opposites in every way except for our size, which is why I think she first started talking to me. Kerri liked to surround herself with other “bodacious babes” as she refers to herself. She’s five foot three in heels and wears the same size clothing as I do. She’s a pint-sized package of energy, attitude and positivity. Some days her enthusiasm for life is hard to take. Today being one of those days.
The dress hunt was starting to feel futile. I was never going to find a dress that didn’t look like I was wearing a sack or made me look lumpy. We were almost out of options in the plus size section of the store. I only had one more rack to look through, the clearance rack. A place where all the hideous pieces the store couldn’t sell at full price were sent to tempt suckers like me to purchase a brand name at a lower price.
I shoved aside dresses covered in beads, huge flowers, glitter and rhinestones until only one dress remained in my size. It was a navy blue wrap dress with three quarter length sleeves and a V-neck. The tag read: As Is $19.99. I couldn’t see anything wrong with it so I decided it was worth a shot. It was the only dress that had come close to being acceptable.
“I’m heading to the dressing room.” I called to Kerri when I spotted the top of her blonde head a few rows back.
“Meet you there.” She answered without looking up.
It took me a few minutes to figure out how to secure the dress properly but when it was finally tied in place I realized that I had found the perfect dress. The material gathered and pleated under my chest before flowing away from my body. The dress ended just below my knees, which surprised me. Normally dresses ended mid-thigh or higher on me. Thanks to the tie on the side I could make the dress looser if I needed to, but I was hoping I wouldn’t get much bigger by the weekend. If anything I should be getting smaller with all the throwing up I had been doing. The doctor assured me that it should be ending soon but so far I was still emptying the contents of my stomach at least once a day. Some days more often if I caught a whiff of eggs or garlic.
“Well, how does it look?” Kerri yelled from outside the dressing room door. I stepped into the hallway and gave a small twirl, loving the way the skirt flared around my legs. “Girl, David won’t be able to keep his hands off you!” Kerri said enviously.
She had tried to talk me out of dating David for a few days after I told her about my new “relationship” but she had never given me a real answer as to why I shouldn’t date my friend. I suspected she had a crush on David but all she would say was not to take a guy like him too seriously. When my relationship was still going strong at the end of the second week Kerri had seemed to come around and stopped talking down about David.
I rolled my eyes in response and headed back into the dressing room to change back into my work clothes. No one wanted to get their hands on me, and the one person that had now wanted nothing to do with me.
Chapter 8
I stood on the sidewalk outside the church in my hometown, thanking my lucky stars that my sister hadn’t asked me to be part of her wedding party while I watched two bridesmaids in bubblegum pink dresses try to bribe the flower girl back into the church. I couldn’t blame the little girl I didn’t want to go inside either. David had dropped me off in front of the church before going to park the car because I had been nauseous on the drive.
“Ready to go in?” David asked placing his hand on my lower back, his role of doting boyfriend in full effect.
“As I’ll ever be.” I responded falling into step beside him.
“How are you feeling?”
“Okay. I think I just needed some fresh air and a moment to calm down. I’m sure it’s just nerves. This is the biggest secret I’ve ever kept.”
“Everything will go smoothly. We’re going to have fun today.” He said giving me a quick squeeze to his side.
“I wouldn’t go that far.” I laughed as we entered the church.
The pews were decorated in swaths of pink tulle with bouquets of white roses, it reminded me of pictures David had been tagged in at the princess themed party for his niece’s fifth birthday last year. We were greeted by a man in a black suit complete with bubblegum pink vest, poor guy. He directed us to the appropriate side of the church, which was completely unnecessary. I could see my mother looking around frantically as she consulted her watch. I led the way down the aisle and entered the third pew, waving hello when I caught her eye.
I had to suppress my chuckle when her face lit up at the sight of David. I had to admit, he did clean up nicely in a navy blue blazer and dress slacks. He even had a white carnation in his lapel that matched the corsage he had brought for me. The smell was overwhelming to my hyperactive senses, so it was sitting in my fridge at home.
I had purposely made sure we arrived just before the ceremony was scheduled to start so that there would be no awkward conversation to start the day. Within minutes of taking our seats Brian, my sister’s fiancé and his groomsmen took their places at the front of the church and the room grew silent as the organist started to play. It took everything I had to keep a straight face while I watched the bridesmaids make their entrance in their dresses that, now that I was closer I could see, shimmered under the light thanks to a fine coating of glitter.
My sister made her appearance to the traditional wedding march and looked every bit the princess, complete with tiara, in her corseted gown with six foot train. When my father returned to his seat and we all sat back down I tuned out the ceremony. I had no interest in the words and what they represented. I was more concerned with how my family would react to my being an unwed mother, especially when I refused to tell them who the father was. I had decided that if Grant didn’t want to be a part of my life or that of his child’s than no one would ever know he was the father. I would just tell everyone that I had gotten drunk and had a one night stand with a man whose name I couldn't remember. I’d worry about what to tell my son or daughter when the time came.
I knew that David would support me if my family turned their backs, as long as he didn’t know the truth either. I didn’t want to destroy his friendship with Grant, it wouldn’t be fair to make him choose between us. Damn you Grant! Why couldn’t you have just stayed out with the guys that night? And why the hell hadn’t I said no? It wasn’t the first time I had cursed both Grant and myself for the situation I was now in and it probably wouldn’t be the last. Ugh! Thinking like this wouldn’t solve anything. I had to focus on the present and the future, not the past.
The ceremony was almost over when I turned my attention back to it. The minister was in the middle of a prayer and I caught my sister smiling down at the new shiny band on her finger. It would be a nice photo if their highly overpriced photographer caught it on film. When the prayer was over they were pronounced husband and wife and Brian gave his new bride a theatrical, back bending kiss that I was sure my sister had ordered him to do. Once they had exited the church we were asked to collect a container of bubbles from the bridesmaids and wait by the front steps of the church. So many silly traditions to take part in.
Outside I stood on the sidewalk again watching all the guests gathering in clusters of friends and relatives while David went in search of the bubbles. I knew maybe a handful of people, the rest complete strangers, which didn’t surprise me at all. In the crowd across from me I caught a glance of dress blues out of the corner of my eye and my thoughts immediately went to Grant, but there was no reason for him to be at Amber’s wedding. It had to be one of Brian’s friends. I craned my neck to get a better look but was interrupted by David’s return.
“Those bridesmaids are bubble Nazis!” He exclaimed handing me my container of heart shaped bubbles. “They didn’t want to give me one for you. I had to point you out and drop that you were the sister of the bride before they’d relent. While they were both looking at you I grabbed some extras for my n
iece.” He flashed me the three containers of bubbles he had stashed in his pants pocket.
“Only you would steal bubbles.” I chuckled as the pink Nazis started yelling for everyone to get their bubbles ready. A little girl knocked into me as she ran by in a rush to finally be allowed to play with her bubbles. I stumbled forward, dropping the heart shaped container in preparation to cradle my precious cargo from the fall when a strong arm wrapped around me halting my fall. I smiled up at David gratefully.
“That was close. Thanks for the save.”
“Too close. You need to be more careful.” He admonished gently pulling me into a hug.
“I will be on the lookout for bubble wielding children from now on.” I promised, drawing a laugh from David as he released me. “Looks like we missed the bubbles. More for your nieces.” I kneeled down and picked up my dropped bubbles for David to give to his nieces.
“I could have got them.”
“I’m perfectly capable of doing it myself.” David gave up the argument when he saw the stubborn look on my face.
“Are you ready to head to the reception?”
“The sooner we get there, the sooner we can leave, right?” I laughed as I took David’s pro-offered arm. I hadn’t realized how old fashioned he was before, it was a refreshing change.
Chapter 9
We had been directed to a table in the front corner when we arrived at the reception hall. It was close enough to the family table that it wouldn’t be considered disrespectful but far enough away that we didn’t have a direct line of sight to the bridal table. I knew my sister well enough to know that it had been done so that I wouldn’t be included in any photographs snapped of the newlyweds and their family. She wanted everything to be perfect and my overly large frame would distract from any photographs. For once my sister’s obsession with perfection didn’t annoy me, it kept me away from my mother’s scrutiny, plus our table was right by the hallway that led to the restrooms. I was sure that I would need to visit the ladies room on multiple occasions throughout the evening.
There were two other place settings on our table and I wondered who else my sister had deemed not good enough to be seated at the family tables. Perhaps it was one of Brian’s cousins from Jersey, Amber had remarked on more than one occasion about how she couldn’t stand how large they teased their hair. I wasn’t particularly concerned with who we would be sharing a table with, as long as it wasn’t my mother.
As one hour of waiting turned into two the hall filled with people, quite a few more than had been at the ceremony, but our table still remained just the two of us. David had brought me several glasses of water and a plate of cheese and crackers, ever the attentive fake boyfriend. He had just launched into a story about a little girl that had called the fire station about her cat when the DJ announced that the bride and groom would be making their entrance momentarily. Finally, only my sister would make her guests wait two hours for her.
As my parents were announced the chair next to me was pulled out and I caught a flash of dark blue sleeve from the corner of my eye. It couldn’t be. My gaze unwillingly followed the sleeve to a broad shoulder and then slowly slid across to meet the intense gaze of green eyes I knew all too well. Grant was watching me intently while I tried to catch my breath. I wasn’t prepared to see him, not even a little. I held his stare while I floundered for something to say, but I was drawing a total blank. After months of angry rants I had composed in my head now that we were face to face I couldn’t come up with a single word.
“And now… the moment you’ve all been waiting for...” The DJ’s voice cut through my stupor, pulling my gaze to the back of the room. “It is my pleasure to announce, for the very first time, Mr. and Mrs. Brian Jones.”
The rest of the guests stood, clapping and cheering as my sister and Brian made their way to into the room to some cheesy country song. I followed their lead halfheartedly clapping as my thoughts spun in confusion. What was Grant doing here? As I snuck a glance at the reason for my turmoil, the door to the kitchen behind him cracked open releasing a wave of garlic infused air. My stomach instantly started to churn and I could feel the familiar burn of acid in my throat. David put a hand on my arm as he turned to check on me when the smell hit him but it was too late. Without a second thought I shoved my chair back and took off running for the bathroom.
I mentally cringed as I heard the chair crash to the floor in the wake of my flight but I think my sister would be more upset if I threw up all over her perfectly decorated table. Thankfully the bathroom was empty and I was able to empty the meager contents of my stomach in peace. When I was sure nothing else was going to come up I rinsed my mouth out at the sink and wiped my face with a damp paper towel. The upside to not slathering my face in makeup was that I didn’t have to make any repairs.
I could hear voices in the hallway as I approached the bathroom door and I prayed that one of them didn’t belong to my mother. The sight that greeted me when I opened the door made me wish that it had been my mother waiting in the hallway for me. David and Grant were squared up to one another, fists clenched, arguing in barely controlled whispers.
“I told you to watch out for her, not sleep with her Heart.” Grant ground out shifting his weight from side to side.
“Don’t get mad at me for cleaning up your mess, MacDaniels.” David volleyed back taking a step closer to Grant, getting in his face. “If you’re pissed, be pissed at yourself for treating her like just another one of your skanks.”
“There’s no comparison. I trusted you. I needed you to watch out for the woman I loved while I wasn’t able to, but you couldn’t keep your hands to yourself, could you? I should have known that you’d make a move as soon as I was out of the country.” Well, that was a relief. They were fighting over that damn mystery woman again. Someone really needed to tell me who she was. Wait... Grant loved her. Which meant that any chance I thought I might have at being with him was truly gone. I suddenly felt like a week old balloon, barely able to keep myself upright.
“Someone had to take care of the situation you left behind. How the hell could you treat someone you love like this?” David’s face was starting to turn red and I watched in shock as he shoved Grant back a step.
“I’m not the one who slept with another man’s woman, asshole!” Grant yelled shoving him back. Shit! This was escalating fast and somehow it would all end up being my fault. I needed to separate them before they started swinging and drew a crowd.
“I never slept with her!” David shouted, drawing his arm back to swing even as I stepped forward.
“Fucking liar!” I grabbed Grant’s arm as he ducked David’s punch and cocked his arm to deliver one of his own. He shook me free, his elbow catching my jaw, sending me tumbling to the floor on my ass in disbelief. I had seen Grant fight before, and the few times one of his bimbos had attempted to stop him he had always gently set them aside or let them lead him away. Tears clouded my vision as I realized that he really didn’t care about me.
“What the hell?” A new voice yelled. I looked up to see Alex rushing toward me. “Are you both fucking stupid? Throwing a pregnant woman on the floor!” He helped me up and wrapped a protective arm around my waist. “Let’s go Kenzie.” I followed in a daze as he led me away from the two men now staring in disbelief at me.
“How did you know?” I asked wincing at the pain radiating through my jaw when I talked.
“Come on, you haven’t had a beer in weeks. Not to mention all the “food poisoning” you’ve had lately. I might not be the brightest crayon in the box but I’m not that stupid. You could have trusted me with this secret too.”
I hung my head in shame. He was right. I shouldn’t have kept my pregnancy a secret from him, but I hadn’t wanted to tell anyone. David only knew because he was there the first time I had gotten sick. At least neither of them knew who the father was. Not that it mattered. Grant obviously had found someone he loved and wanted to be with, someone that wasn’t me. My child would grow u
p without a father.
“I’m sorry. Can you take me home? David drove.”
“Well, that might be a little hard to do since I came as Grant’s plus one.” Well hell, how was I supposed to make my escape? Wait, David hadn’t been wearing his blazer, if luck was on my side, and it really should be at this point in my day, hell my life, his keys would be in it at the table.
Unfortunately escape wasn’t that easy. My mother was waiting for us when we arrived at the table.
“Are you trying to ruin your sister’s wedding day MacKenzie?” She demanded in a harsh whisper.
“No ma’am.” Alex answered for me. “It seems that the diner she and David stopped at wasn’t serving the freshest of meat. They’ve both been back in the bathrooms tossing their cookies, or in this case hamburgers. Grant is helping David and I’m gathering their things before helping them get home safely. Don’t want to ruin the day for anyone.” He gave her one of his patented smiles, that he had used hundreds of times growing up to get out of trouble, while I kept my gaze down and my chin into his side. It hurt like hell and I was positive that if anyone looked too closely at it they would be able to see a bruise starting to form.
“Thank you for sacrificing your day to take care of my misguided daughter and her date.” My mother smiled back at Alex. “MacKenzie, we will have a talk tomorrow about your eating habits and your future.”
“Yes, mother.” If she only knew the truth. There were no well wishes to feel better as Alex and I escaped the reception hall, but I hadn’t been expecting any.
I hoped David would understand when he realized that his car was missing. I couldn’t face Grant after learning the truth. I needed to regroup before I made one last attempt to let him know he was going to be a father, but I had low expectations that he would actually agree to meet with me alone to talk. After all, he ignored all of my overtures for the last three months. At least now I knew why. My best friend had fallen in love with another woman and I wasn’t sure if my heart would survive.