by Lisa Cardiff
A crack of thunder split the air, rattling the stained cedar porch under my feet, drawing my attention to the heavy, dark clouds in the sky.
“Are you ready?” Marcello asked.
He was leaning up against the side of the black sedan we’d taken from the airport. His arms were folded across his chest, and one ankle was casually tucked in front of the other. Like every single time he looked at me, my pulse kicked up a notch.
A smile stretched across my face, and all of the mixed feelings about leaving the life I’d known here had dissipated. This was the right thing to do. My life had changed course again, and I was looking forward to seeing how it unfolded. It was full of promise. I had Marcello, I didn’t have to worry about money, and I could escape the strings tying me to the Trassatos if I wanted to. I could play piano again. How I let so many years pass without playing was baffling. It had been the center of my life for so long, and I had sacrificed it like I had sacrificed so many things over the last few years.
I jogged down the front steps and jumped into the car, feeling lighter and full of hope.
We pulled away from the house, and the gravel of the driveway gave way to the smooth pavement of the highway. I peeked at Marcello out of the corner of my eye. The threatening rain clouds shadowed one side of his face, painting him half-dark and half-light. He hadn’t shaved in a couple of days, and his face looked softer, almost touchable.
Sadly, he was engrossed in driving like I was the furthest thing from his mind. Ever since he had stepped outside this morning to take a phone call, he’d been distant and closed off. Sure, he had my back with Brandon, and I was grateful even though I was confident in my ability stick up for myself. Tempting as it was to hide behind him with so many unknowns hanging in the balance—Sal’s threats, the future of the ranch, and the police investigation—I wouldn’t do it. I had to stand on my own two feet.
The sedan crept steadily up the hill, rain battering the windows and drumming the roof. It echoed through the interior of the car, eclipsing the music on the radio. The tall pine trees stood like guardians on the shoulders of the road, swaying in the wind.
A deer darted into the road as we crested the hill.
“Fuck!” Marcello yelled.
His right thigh flexed, hitting the brake, but the car didn’t slow down. Instead we accelerated as we descended the hill. The deer froze in the middle of the road, its brown eyes transfixed. A primal scream erupted from deep down in my chest.
Marcello jerked the steering wheel to the left. The car careened over a gully, momentarily taking flight. My stomach bottomed out, and I squeezed my eyes shut, too afraid to look. Branches scraped the side of the car. I jerked up and down in my seat, only held in place by the seatbelt biting into my breastbone.
Finally, after what seemed like hours of panic, the car skidded sideways, coming to a stop. Paralyzed, I waited for the pain to set in. I catalogued every inch of my body. Other than the sting of the seatbelt across my chest, I felt normal. Surprisingly normal.
CHAPTER
TWENTY-FOUR
“Emilia! Emilia! Are you okay? Look at me.”
I pried open my eyes, taking in my surroundings. Pine trees loomed over us, the wind bending and pushing the branches in all directions. A jagged crack shot diagonally through the front windshield. I glanced at Marcello. His brows were furrowed, and his mouth was tense with worry.
“I think so,” I answered, realizing he was waiting for an answer.
He pulled me tight against his chest, and his lips brushed the crown of my head.
“What happened?”
“Fuck. I don’t know. I slammed on the brakes, and they didn’t work.”
My body went rigid, and I blinked away the tears in the corners of my eyes. It was too much. Couldn’t something in my life be easy?
“Do you think…” I paused, not entirely certain I wanted to voice the fears niggling at the back of my head. “Do you think someone did something to the car?”
“They were working when I pulled out of the ranch, but that doesn’t mean anything. Someone could’ve have popped a hole in the brake line so I didn’t notice right away.” He released me, and I whimpered, not wanting to let go of the safety I felt in his arms. He grabbed his phone and jabbed his finger on the screen with enough force to shatter it.
“Johnny, we ran into some car trouble. I need you to pick us up.” Marcello paused. “Yeah. I don’t care what you’re doin’. Get your ass here now. We went off the road on the first hill east of the ranch. I need you to bring a flashlight to look at the brake line.” Marcello disconnected the phone and stuffed it into his pocket.
“Where is he?”
“He’s at a hotel about twenty minutes away from here. Hey,” Marcello, whispered, pulling me into his arms again. I didn’t notice my whole body tremors until that second. “Come here. Everything is going to be fine. We’re both safe.”
I stayed in the car while Marcello and Johnny talked in lowered voices far enough from the car that I couldn’t make out their words. While Marcello wouldn’t have objected if I got out and joined the conversation, something kept me glued to the seat. Today had brought to the surface all the stuff I hated about the mafia. You could never forget that danger was always right around the corner.
After a few minutes, Johnny crawled underneath the car, flashlight in hand. Marcello crouched next to the driver’s door, barking off questions in Italian. It frustrated me that they had switched languages, likely at Marcello’s urging. He knew I didn’t speak Italian fluently. In fact, I understood even less since I hadn’t heard it for years until recently.
When Johnny finally reappeared, he nodded. That was it. No words. Nothing. Marcello brows slammed together, and his eyes looked positively glacial. He didn’t have to say anything. His face said it all. Someone had tampered with the car.
Brandon was the most obvious culprit, although we couldn’t rule out Sal. He threatened me, both of us really, and Marcello never exactly came clean about what happened to Sal after I went to bed.
Marcello opened the passenger door and held his hand out to me. “Come on. We have to get going. The plane can’t wait all day.”
“Is everything okay?” I wanted to slap my own forehead for asking the dumbest question of all time. Of course everything wasn’t okay. Only Marcello’s driving skills and sheer luck prevented us from being seriously injured, if not killed.
“Johnny’s taking us to the airport, and then he’ll be back to clean up this mess.”
That was a non-answer if I’d ever heard one.
“Right.” I took his outstretched hand while Johnny retrieved our luggage and trudged up the embankment. “Somebody messed with the car, didn’t they?”
Marcello shot me an unreadable look before pulling me along in his wake. Rain pelted my face, mud splashed my ankles, and the wind whistled through my hair. With every step, my clothes were becoming more and more waterlogged, but I couldn’t think about that right then.
“Why won’t you tell me what’s going on?”
He dropped my hand and speared his hand into his hair. “Everything worked out. It’s not a big deal.”
“Not a big deal?” I parroted, my voice sounding hysterical to my own ears. “We could’ve died.”
His lips twitched. “We didn’t, though.”
“This isn’t funny.”
“Emilia, you’re mine. It’s my job to take care of you. Okay? I don’t want you worrying about this shit. I fucked up. I should’ve checked the car before we left, especially with Sal’s bullshit threats hanging over our heads. If he—”
His hands balled into fists. He didn’t have to finish his sentence. He’d kill Sal. Hell, I’d kill Sal. I couldn’t believe I actually thought I loved him at one point in my life. It was hard to believe someone I once thought I loved could turn out to be such a colossal disappointment.
I rose up onto my toes. “I know. I know,” I whispered, pressing my lips to his. “But like you said, I’m okay
. You don’t need to kill anyone today.”
He nipped the shell of my ear. “You have no idea what I’d do for you. I’d bargain, lie, cheat, steal, kill. There’s no limit when it comes to your safety, Emilia.”
My insides fluttered like I had inhaled a butterfly whole, and my bones rattled with awareness of him. Us. “I—I…” My chest expanded with the words that demanded to be released. I loved Marcello, and part of me knew I always had. All those silly letters we exchanged, the perpetual hollowness when I ran away, the way I could never resist him—all of it pointed to the same conclusion. The one I’d been ignoring for too long. I opened my mouth to finish my declaration and, at the last second, slammed it shut. Apprehension crawled through my gut. I couldn’t lay myself bare. I wasn’t ready.
I took off running up the hill. His footfalls were heavy behind me. Not wanting to see his face, I forced myself not to look back. I climbed into the back seat of Johnny’s car, braced my head in my hands, and sucked in one deep breath after another.
“Emilia?” Marcello climbed into the seat beside me and pried my fingers away from my face. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. Everything. I don’t know.”
He cradled the back of my head, forcing me to look at him, his arctic blues reading my soul like other people read a book. “You don’t have to hide from me. I’m not going to hurt you.”
I bit the inside of my cheek. “I want to believe you.”
“Then do. It’s as simple as that. We’ll go back to your home, get your things, and we can be on a plane to Chicago in twenty-four hours. Screw the rest of this bullshit.”
“Are you sure you want me to come with you? To your home? And be part of your life? You’ve been so distant since that phone call. I thought I’d done something wrong and you were having second thoughts about us.”
He sighed and didn’t respond right away. Something akin to guilt flashed across his face, and I stilled, staring at this confusing man who owned me. He yanked me against him and pressed his face against my neck, kissing the sting away. He attacked my mouth, his damp body cocooning me. It only took a few seconds for him to intoxicate me with his kisses.
“I have no intention of letting you go. That’s what I meant when I said you were mine,” he murmured against my lips and pulled away.
I sagged in my seat, the tension draining from me. It wasn’t a proclamation of love, but it was something. Something we could build on. “Okay.”
“Are we good?”
I nodded.
Marcello opened the car door and waved to Johnny. “Let’s go before we’re stuck here for another night.”
CHAPTER
TWENTY-FIVE
The instant Marcello and I stepped foot into my dad’s house, a firestorm erupted. My plan to creep quietly inside to gather some clean clothes and head to Marcello’s place in the city wouldn’t be happening anytime soon. My dad and Lucca stood like sentries in the foyer, their arms crossed, almost identical frowns on their faces. Tension filled the air, and I knew without them opening their mouths they’d been at each other’s throats since Marcello called them from the plane and filled them in on the whole car debacle.
Two seconds after the door closed behind us, Lucca fired the first shot.
“That’s it. I’m done playing games with my niece’s life. Emilia is coming to Italy with me.”
“No,” my dad growled. “We’ve already been through this. She’ll stay here with me. I’ll have my people watching her around the clock.”
“I couldn’t save my sister, and I’m not gonna make the same mistake with her daughter. You don’t have a fuckin’ clue who tampered with the brake line. It could have been your handpicked man, Sally boy, or whatever his name is.”
“Back off, Lucca. You don’t know what you’re talking about. She’s my daughter. She doesn’t know you anymore than she knows Joe Blow down the street. As for Sal, he knows I’d cut off his balls and feed ‘em to my dog if he touched my daughter.”
I flinched at his graphic words. Funny that my father didn’t care when Sal was messing with my feelings. Apparently, attempted murder crossed his warped code of honor, though.
“I’ve already bought her a ticket. She’s not safe here. Even if Sal’s not behind this, who knows what that asshole brother of her now-deceased husband is up to. My people have dug up plenty of dirt on him.” Lucca shook his head. “No, she needs to get out of the country for a while. It’s the only reasonable option.”
Marcello’s hand slid around my hip. I shifted closer to him, wanting him to shield me. I’d been in shock since we slid off the road, and I didn’t have the energy to go rounds with them. I silently begged Marcello to say anything to protect me and defend us.
“She’ll stay with me at my place in the city,” Marcello finally interjected. “I’ll take care of her.”
“I’m fine with that as long as Gian can check out the security and talk with your guys.”
Lucca rolled his eyes. “No. That won’t work.”
“It’s none of your business.” Marcello’s hand tightened around me like I would slip though his fingers any second. “This is between Emilia and me, and she wants to stay with me.”
Lucca’s eyes narrowed, and his lips curved into a nasty smirk. “What about the Rossi girl? Her family isn’t going to like you playing house with Emilia while you’re engaged to her. Isn’t the wedding in a couple of months?”
The blood drained from my head, and a whooshing sound echoed through my ears. My meal of crackers on the plane inched up my throat. I swallowed repeatedly, desperately fighting what I hoped wouldn’t be a losing battle. Getting sick or fainting right here in my dad’s study wouldn’t do much for my already embattled dignity and self-esteem. An indescribable emptiness replaced the happiness of the last few days.
Marcello planned to marry someone else? What the hell? He hadn’t said a word. My eyes sought out his, longing for answers. His face was blank. No guilt. No regrets. Nothing. He might as well have been a wax figure in a museum.
My eyes burned. My throat burned. My entire body was burning up with too many emotions and sensations to name, and I couldn’t say or do a damn thing. My heart clenched inside of my chest, and I swayed on my feet. By the grace of God, I didn’t actually burst into tears.
Was I having a nervous breakdown?
Was this what it felt like when someone you were head over heels in love with stomped on your spirit and made a laughingstock out of you? Because if it was, I didn’t want anything to do with it. I was better off alone.
“Emilia,” my father said, interrupting my staring contest with Marcello. “Why don’t you go look over your piano? I put it in the great room.”
“You what?”
When I noticed its absence, I thought he had finally gotten rid of the piano. Hacked it into a million pieces, glad to be rid of my mom and me and every final reminder of us. Case in point, he had it relocated from its place of honor to a spare bedroom after my mother killed herself, and then when I came home after Gavin died, the room that housed the piano was entirely empty.
“I pulled it out of storage. I thought you might want to play again.” His face softened in a way I hadn’t witnessed since I was a child, and my chest ached for those days when I thought my family was normal and my parents loved me.
I glared at Marcello one more time, imploring him to explain. If anything, he looked even less repentant than before, and in a single non-caring look, he had managed to trample what was left of my soul into dust. The air around us turned barren and friable, crackling with mutual anger.
The longer I stared at him, the more I felt like I was losing every last shred of my dignity. Funny how when I finally thought I had reached a tipping point and all the bad stuff in my life was in the rearview mirror, fate had a way of proving I was a complete and total fool. I needed to wrap myself in Kevlar because the hits wouldn’t stop coming.
“Sure,” I said, my voice weak and sullen. I studied the tips of my
black boots, desperate not to look him in the eye. “Marcello, can you bring my suitcase inside?”
“For fuck’s sake, Emilia, you’re staying here? Just like that, you’re ready to run?”
“Not run. Just,” I shrugged, “giving myself some space.”
“Space? Seriously?” He tipped up my chin, forcing me to look at him, and I immediately regretted it. His angry and hollow expression punched me directly in the solar plexus.
“I think that’s probably the best option now,” I responded as tonelessly as possible given my inability to get enough air into my lungs.
He rubbed the back of his neck, the muscle in his jaw pulsing. “You know what? You can do whatever the fuck you want. You always do.”
“Fine, no, you’re right, Marcello.” I waved my hand crazily over my head. “Let’s air all of this right here front of my family. I mean, who the hell cares about privacy anyway? I know I don’t. My whole disappointing life is already on display for everyone, so let’s go ahead and put it all out there. Are you engaged? It’s a simple question. Yes or no? Tell me. I deserve to know.”
“It’s not that simple.”
A brittle laugh fell from my lips. “Of course it is. You’re either engaged or not. There’s no in between.”
“Come back to my place with me and we’ll talk about it.”
His refusal to deny it told me all I needed to know, and I lost the last bit of hold on my rage. I slammed my open palm into his chest as hard as I could over and over, not stopping until he physically restrained my wrists.
His eyes glittered like ice. “What the fuck has gotten into you?”
“You!” I screamed, tears streaming down my face. “You know what? You make me sick with all your games and lies. Get the fuck out of my face. We’re done.”
Shock exploded on Marcello’s face, and he unshackled my hands like he couldn’t stand touching me. “No, we’re not.”