“He helped a woman carry in groceries about thirty minutes ago and hasn’t come back out.”
Shit. Not good. Not good at all. That meant Tyler was inside with Shaun. Whenever he was around someone new he became very nervous and started wildly shaking his hands in front of himself until he became comfortable. Sometimes he never calmed down, and they would need to leave. Unless her mother had told Shaun about Tyler, he would have no clue what was going on.
As she half ran toward the house, the memories of Walter flooded her mind. His hurtful words and how he’d treated Tyler. Even before they’d had the diagnosis, Walter laughed at their son’s behavior. If his own father could mock and laugh at him, what was Shaun going to do? Please don’t laugh. He’s just an innocent child who has feelings.
Fear and anger filled her as she opened the door and began searching the house. Then she heard her mother say, “Tyler this is Mommy’s friend, Shaun. Say hi to Shaun.”
“Hi, Shaun,” Tyler repeated.
Morgan stopped in her tracks, holding her breath, waiting to hear Shaun’s reaction.
“Hello, Tyler,” Shaun’s voice echoed calmly from the living room.
Only then did she exhale and gain the courage to enter the room. Tyler was flapping his hands as expected. Morgan turned to meet Shaun’s eyes and prepared herself for the worst. She couldn’t read his thoughts, but she saw that he was watching Tyler closely. What are you thinking, Shaun? His expression was serious, as though studying him, yet not like Walter or others had done. No matter what, she was uncomfortable with the entire situation. She had no time to prepare and her emotions were all over the place.
He only stopped looking at Tyler when Elisabeth made her presence known.
“How was your bike ride, Morgan?” Elisabeth asked.
“Great.” She turned back to Shaun whose face was riddled with questions. Was he regretting coming here? No one invited you. You can leave now. Nothing is stopping you. Make it quick. Just get it over with. “Mom, I think Tyler might want a snack after that long ride. Would you mind taking him into the kitchen?” She wanted to make sure Tyler wasn’t in earshot of whatever was going to be said between her and Shaun.
She saw the hesitation in her mother’s eyes, but it was too late as Tyler heard the word snack and was already on the move to the kitchen.
“It was a pleasure meeting you, Shaun. I hope to see you again soon.”
Don’t count on it, Mom. He shouldn’t be here now, never mind again.
“Thank you for the drink.” Shaun handed her the empty glass before she left the room.
Once alone Morgan turned her full attention back to Shaun. Still standing, now with her hands on her hips, she asked, “What are you doing here?”
Only then did he make eye contact with her. “Looking for you; there were a few questions I needed answers to.”
I’m not buying it. Why are you really here? “Okay. What are they?”
She watched a grin appear. “Your mother answered them for me.”
Oh, shit! Now I’m scared. What did you do, Mom? This is not the type of man you think he is. He’s not here because he cares about me and Tyler. He’s here because . . . hell I don’t know why, but I know it’s not good, whatever it is.
“And those questions were what exactly?”
He got up from the seat and walked over to her. “Don’t worry. I have more than what I came for.”
And that is what worries me. If you’re not going to tell me, then I’ll get it out of my mother. Obviously she has loose lips.
“Then I guess you can go now.”
Shaun ignored her. “What’s wrong with him?”
It felt like a punch in the gut or a hard slap in the face. She couldn’t control her tone as she replied, “Nothing is wrong with him.”
Apparently he knew she was hurt by his careless words; his tone became soft and defensive. “That’s not what I meant. I only mea—”
“That he’s odd? Different? Special?” she snapped at him accusingly.
“Don’t put words in my mouth.”
“I’m not. You’re the one who implied it.”
“Morgan.”
He reached for her hand, but she pulled it away. She didn’t want his touch or whatever lame excuse he was about to sputter out. She wanted nothing from him. It was obvious this was not what he expected when he arrived. He probably is shocked to find I have a son, never mind one with special needs.
“Morgan. Calm down. I don’t understand why you’re so upset.”
Of course, you don’t. You don’t understand anything. Not what Tyler needs and not what I need. So stop trying to pretend you care.
“You’re right. You don’t. And you never will. Since you have your answers, Mr. Henderson, I think it’s best you leave now.” Her tone was dry, emotionless. She was not going to let him see how much this was truly hurting her. Bury the feelings I have. If not for myself, then for Tyler’s sake.
He looked at her closely. “Is that what you truly want, Morgan?”
God no. I want you to pull me into your arms. Tell me that you find me amazing and my son super smart. That you want to take us to the zoo and spend the entire day getting to know us. Can’t you see it? Are you blind or is it you don’t want to see what is right there in front of you? We just want to belong, for someone to accept us as we are, flaws and all. I won’t allow myself to say it, so you’re going to have to figure it out yourself.
“Yes.” It was short and simple but to the point. Yet she knew the word hurt her more than it did him.
He glared at her for a moment then said, “I’ll see you in the office Monday,” and walked out of the living room.
When she heard the front door close, she felt her body relax. That’s when the tears started to flow. Why? It’s already difficult at work. Why come here and make it more difficult? What the hell does he want from me?
Morgan shouted down the hall. “Mom, I’m going upstairs. I’ll be back down for Tyler in a few.”
Her mother came out of the kitchen just as the tears became a steady flow. Her voice filled with concern. “Morgan?”
“I can’t right now, Mom.” Morgan choked on her words. Elisabeth didn’t say anything more, and Morgan ran up the stairway to her own apartment. She had to pull herself together before seeing Tyler. He would pick up on her emotions, and that wasn’t fair to him.
Once inside she laid on her bed face down, blocking out the rest of the world. All the pain from Walter felt like it was just yesterday. Shaun coming here opened all the old wounds. Her reaction to him had nothing to do with him and everything to do with her.
She’d faced people before who judged or couldn’t understand. Never had she treated them like this. Normally she pitied them for their ignorance. Something was different with Shaun. Everything was different. And it scared the hell out of her.
Damn you, Shaun. Damn you for making me want something more. I promised myself that I would never hope and dream again. Look at me now! Damn you. Morgan lifted her head from her pillow, wiped her cheeks, and sat on the edge of the bed. It was time to go downstairs and face her mother. She needed to explain Shaun’s quick exit, and she needed to find out what the heck he was doing here in the first place. I don’t know why I even care. It doesn’t matter. He’s gone and won’t be coming back.
Chapter Seven
“Morgan, you need to talk to him,” Elisabeth said.
She sipped her morning coffee trying not to think of what she’s going to be facing this morning. Weekends always went by too quickly; this one was no exception. The only difference is it wasn’t the job that made her hate Monday. No matter how she cut it, it was inevitable that she was going to face one or more of the Hendersons today. What have you told them, Shaun? Did you say I practically threw you out of my home?
“I’m sure we will. I do work for them.”
“You know that’s not what I mean, Morgan. You haven’t even talked about it. How do you expect to be able to go into work
and not let it affect your performance?”
I have no idea. Haven’t thought that far ahead. Been trying not to think about it at all. And failing miserably. “He . . . wasn’t comfortable here.”
Elisabeth shook her head. “That’s not the way it appeared to me.”
“You weren’t here during the entire visit.”
“Then tell me about it.”
Morgan didn’t want to relive it. It was bad enough the first time. “Why was he here? He wouldn’t tell me.”
“I’m not sure why he came, but once he was here, all he wanted to do was hear about you and Tyler.”
“It doesn’t make any sense. Why?”
Her mother chuckled softly. “You’ve been alone too long to see the signs? The man is interested in you.”
Not in the way you think, Mom. He isn’t looking for love and a family. Maybe a little fun on the side but nothing more. Nothing real. “But I’m not interested in him.”
“Really? Then why did you kick him out?”
That’s the easy one to answer. “He wasn’t prepared for wha—”
“No sweetheart. You weren’t prepared.”
Her mother knew her so well that even when she didn’t want to see the truth, her mother did, and was never afraid to let her know. Not harshly, but as a dear loving friend. And the truth was, she wasn’t prepared. There was so much running through her mind. Good, bad, happy, and sad. For the last six years, the only emotion she’d allowed herself was the love she shared with her family. Everything else she’d put in a box, one she thought she’d never open again. How did Shaun lift the lid in only a week? What was it about him that was so different? And could she close the lid now? Was it too late to go back to the way things were just a week ago? A time when life may not have been easy, yet it was simple, and she was happy. That was more than she could say now. It felt painful to even think about smiling, never mind actually doing it.
Morgan buried her face in her hands, trying to shield the evidence of tears coming down. It wasn’t about facing Shaun or any of the other Hendersons. It was all about her. She was trying to face things she’d avoided up to now. All she needed was one more day, and she knew she could pull herself together. Just one more day.
“I can’t . . .” face the world right now. I want to hide my head in the sand.
“Then don’t. Call your office and tell them you’re ill.”
Call out sick? I can’t do that. Morgan wiped her cheeks and got up from the kitchen table. Giving up or giving in wasn’t who she was. It was time to remember what was important to her, and that was Tyler’s happiness and well-being.
Tyler came into the kitchen and sat down quietly at the table, waiting for his fruit bowl and toast. No matter what occurred, he went through the routine of his everyday life. She needed to be more like him, more resilient. God, I love this boy. If only everyone could see him through my eyes. He’s precious.
Her decision was made. Today wasn’t about going to face Shaun. This was about facing herself. Walter had left her filled with fear and insecurities. It was time to start becoming the woman she was before, strong and confident. It’s what she wanted and what Tyler deserved. She never realized she was letting Walter win by hiding away like she was ashamed and defeated. There was no reason to feel ashamed and worthless. If anyone should feel that way, it should be the Sapp family.
Time to become an advocate. I’ve spent too many years avoiding the pain. Today it stops. You can’t feel joy without dealing with some hurt.
“Mom, I’ll be back by six.” If not earlier.
“Where are you going?”
To do something I should have done from day one. Be myself. Be Morgan, the proud mama of an awesome young man, Tyler. “Work.”
Morgan kissed Tyler on top of his head and walked out of the kitchen. She stopped in the hall and lifted one of the pictures off the wall. I have the perfect spot on my desk for this.
“What do you mean you weren’t the one who authorized the change?”
“Dean, all I know is the contract changes never crossed my desk.” Shaun didn’t want to cause more concern than needed, but then again, Dean and Tessa didn’t need another year like the prior one. He’d do whatever he needed to make sure no one hurt them again.
Dean picked up the phone. “Ask . . . the new woman in HR to come up here.”
“Her name’s Morgan.”
“I don’t care what her name is; I just need to make sure she pulls her weight.”
He knew Dean could be tough, but this was more like the old Dean, before Tessa. If anything, he thought Dean would come back from Paris more lenient. What aren’t you telling me? I can’t help what I don’t know.
“She’s better than I gave her credit for.”
“That’s not hard. I believe you thought she wasn’t capable of anything. One day of training with Lexi was all she had. Even I thought I’d be getting calls from the staff saying they weren’t paid.”
It was closer than you think, but she pulled it off. That and many other things. He wasn’t about to discuss Morgan with Dean or anyone else. He’d told her all his questions had been answered, but that was bullshit. When she’d practically demanded he leave her home, his list of questions quadrupled. He’d been tempted to stay and dig deeper, but not with her son there. He just needed to be patient, and she would come to him. Never thought I’d look forward to a Monday morning.
“Shaun, what’s going on? You look . . . distracted.” Dean arched a brow, eyeing him closely.
“I pulled Bennett in to do some research. He said he’d have the information this morning. That’s all that’s on my mind right now. I think that would be your top priority as well.”
Dean got up from behind his desk. “It’s one of them.”
“What’s the other?”
He ran his hand through his hair. “Shaun, Tessa is pregnant.”
Damn. “I thought you’d be happy about that.”
“Mixed feelings.”
I hope you haven’t told Tessa that, otherwise I think the wedding will be off. Shaun wasn’t the one to talk to Dean about family responsibilities. Hell, he didn’t have any of his own. Morgan even picked up on his lack of experience Saturday. I should tell you to talk to Brice. At least he’s a father. Me, I’m just an asshole. And if you don’t believe me, just ask Morgan.
“I hear that’s natural.”
“Nothing about this family is natural. All I can do is think about our dad—what he was like. If I’m even a tenth of the man he was, I shouldn’t be a father.”
That’s something I think about every day myself. “You’re not. If you were, Tessa wouldn’t be alive today would she? Good ole Dad never would’ve taken a bullet, never mind three, for any of us.”
“Are you telling me that’s not why you keep your distance? Why you’ve never married or never seriously dated anyone?”
Shaun didn’t answer. It was a common fear they all shared. He could say otherwise, but Dean wasn’t going to buy it.
There was no talking Dean out of how he felt about being a father. “This isn’t about me. This is about you and Tessa, and now your child. Whatever doubts you have, you better get them under control quickly because whether you think you’re fit or not, you’re going to be a father.”
There was a knock on the door, which meant their conversation would need to be tabled for now. If I’m lucky, this will be the end of it.
“Hello, Mr. Henderson. You asked to see me?”
Morgan entered and looked at Dean directly. Avoiding me are you? Try if you want, but trust me Morgan, you’ll find it’s impossible. She was back to dressing and acting pure business. No matter what she wore, she was beautiful, but he enjoyed how she looked Saturday. Her long hair loose and wild and dressed casually, playful. More herself.
“Call me Dean. Close the door and have a seat. I want to touch base regarding your first week.”
Shaun almost laughed as he watched her stroll right over to the chair next to hi
m and sit so she was facing Dean. Why all the resistance when I ask?
She was holding her laptop. “Would you like me to log into the system? I wasn’t sure exactly what you might require this morning.”
Dean shook his head. “If there were any problems, I would’ve already heard them from Shaun. Not sure if you’ve noticed, but he has no problem voicing his opinion.”
Shaun watched Morgan smile slightly, but she gave no response. Ever the professional. But I’ve seen the fiery side. I must bring out the fire in you. I hope so.
“So what information can I provide you?”
Dean leaned forward to rest his arms on the desk. “We didn’t speak much before I left on my trip. The only training you received was from Lexi. Although she did a great job, I wanted to make sure you didn’t have any questions about your position here.”
“No. I’m clear on my responsibilities. And if I’m correct, the HR manager will be back today?”
“Not this week. She’s pretty tired from the trip.” Dean looked at Shaun then to Morgan. “I’d appreciate if this information does not leave this room.”
“Of course,” Morgan agreed.
“She’s pregnant.”
Morgan’s face shined with a genuine glow of happiness for them. “Congratulations. I have a son who’s nine. I wouldn’t change being a parent for anything.”
“There’s nothing about it you’d change?” Shaun asked. It was what he was thinking, but he’d never expected it to come out. By the look on her face, he never should’ve voiced it.
Her beautiful honey brown eyes darkened. It wasn’t anger he saw, but pain. Neither had been his intention. Normally he had full control of both his actions and words. Something about Morgan made him forget himself. I’m not sure I like that.
Although she was trying hard, Shaun could see her lip tremble as she spoke to him.
“I’m sure we all have things in our lives that we wish we could change. Some years ago and then some just last week. Wouldn’t you agree?”
You & Me Make Three: Barrington Billionaire's Series: Book Three Page 7