The Perfect Mess

by K. Sterling

  By the time Michelle returned Ben was over feeling sorry for himself and missing Landon. He was furious and in a nearly full blown panic.

  “I don’t know where he is! He’s not answering his phone now and when we talked he wasn’t making any sense,” he explained as he paced and did everything in his power not to throw his phone as Landon’s voicemail picked up again. Luckily, Michelle was thinking clearer than Ben and Landon put together. She only had to call three hotels before she confirmed that Landon was checked into the Ritz-Carlton and was safe in his room. The concierge had been very sympathetic and reassured them that he had seen to Landon himself. He’d been in such terrible shape when he arrived, they would have called the police if they hadn’t been able to establish that Landon was a guest with a reservation and able to get him checked in.

  “Well… At least you know it’s not just you,” she offered as Ben poured himself a glass of wine. “He’s definitely taking this worse,” Michelle added and Ben snorted as he raised his glass.

  “I’m going to kick him in the balls so hard when I see him again,” Ben swore before he took a long drink. Michelle nodded in agreement.

  “There you go. Hang on to that anger and seethe until you see him again,” she advised and Ben laughed.

  “He’s so lucky I can’t leave sooner,” Ben said then every bit of anger and tension drained from him and he felt empty again. “I wish I could go sooner!” He said as he sagged onto a stool and leaned on the counter. “He sounded so terrible! I thought he was injured and he kept crying my name. Why did I let him leave?” He asked before he drained his glass. He poured another and Michelle made a soft, sympathetic sound as she took the bottle and put a stopper in it.

  “A few drinks to help you relax is allowed but I can’t have you both incoherent,” she stated and Ben nodded in agreement. Now, he just wanted Landon to sober up and call so that he knew that he was feeling better. Or at least conscious.

  Chapter 25

  Landon’s eyes burned as they wandered around his new boss’ office. They avoided the large windows and ached at the brightness of the room with its glaring natural light and soft yellow walls. He should have been happy as he stared at the characters that smiled at him through colorful framed prints. They taught him to draw. He’d sketched them hundreds of times as a child and had books full of adventures he’d created for them. Landon’s hands curved around the edge of his seat as he fought the urge to bury his face in his hands. The door swung open and Landon jumped to his feet.

  “You’re finally here!” Jeffrey Argus said loudly as he offered his hand. Landon did his best to look excited as he took Jeffrey’s hand.

  “It’s pretty hard to believe,” Landon said. “Thank you again, Mr. Argus.” He was about to sit when he was pulled toward the door.

  “Call me Jeff. There’s a lot for you to see and I thought we’d start with your office,” Jeff said as he gestured for Landon to follow him. Landon nodded as he jogged along. They didn’t have far to go. Jeff pushed a door open and waved Landon in. Landon blinked as he absorbed everything around him.

  While his new office was only half as big as Jeff’s but it was still huge. It was painted in a bright shade of leaf green and had two sitting areas. Landon stumbled toward his desk and the large gift basket covering half of its surface. It overflowed with plush characters, candy, champagne and various PixelWorks memorabilia. Jeff grabbed a baseball cap and deposited it on Landon’s head. He smiled as he set his hands on his hips.

  “It looks good on you! Welcome to PixelWorks!” Jeff said and Landon wished the moment felt as magical as he imagined it. And he’d imagined it over and over again, it didn’t make sense that he would feel so flat and empty when he was finally there.

  “Thank you,” Landon mumbled as he looked around the room. Jeff’s hand closed over his shoulder.

  “Are you ok, Landon? Is something wrong?” He asked and his eyes were searching and concerned when Landon looked at him. Landon didn’t know what to say. He looked at the basket again, hoping the reality would sink in and he’d feel something more than being out of place or that he’d misplaced something very important. Ben’s face filled his vision and Landon’s shoulders sagged.

  “I’m so sorry,” Landon whispered as he pulled off the cap and set it on the table. “I made a terrible mistake. I can’t take the job, Jeff,” he said and Jeff’s head lurched back.

  “Did you get another offer? If it’s a matter of pay…” he stopped when Landon shook his head.

  “I didn’t get another offer.” Landon’s lips pulled tight. “Maybe I did. But it isn’t about the money. I shouldn’t have left New York,” he said, more to himself. “I should have stayed and proposed,” Landon murmured and Jeff laughed.

  “Is that it?” He asked and Landon’s head snapped to Jeff’s. “I felt kind of bad, if I’m honest,” Jeff said as he patted Landon on the shoulder. “I was going to have to break it to you and wasn’t looking forward to it,” he said and cringed. “This office is temporary.” Jeff rubbed the back of his neck and Landon frowned.

  “It’s temporary?” He asked and Jeff nodded.

  “Yeah. We brought you on to head our new anime division. I was going to talk to you about building your own team. But there’s not enough room here. We’re planning to add a whole new facility,” Jeff said and Landon groaned. All of it would have been perfect nine weeks ago. Now, he really was turning down his dream job.

  “I’d love all of that, more than you can imagine. But I have to pass. I have to go back, Jeff.” Landon felt a whiff of relief. He was disappointed at the thought of walking away from PixelWorks but he knew he was doing the right thing. Even heading a new anime division at PixelWorks wasn’t worth being without Ben. Jeff laughed as he snatched the hat off the desk and put it back on Landon’s head.

  “Go back to New York and propose. Then, start building your team. You can set up your division in New York,” he said and Landon had to grab the desk, it felt like the floor rolled beneath his feet.

  “I…” He didn’t know what to say. “Really?” He asked in shock and Jeff nodded as he shook Landon’s shoulder.

  “You would have saved us all a lot of trouble if you had mentioned your desire to stay in New York when we were negotiating your contract,” Jeff said and Landon knew his mouth was hanging open.

  “I didn’t think it was an option and it wasn’t an issue then,” he said and Jeff grinned.

  “Looks like she’s an issue now,” he said and Landon winced.

  “He,” Landon corrected and Jeff’s eyes grew wide.

  “Oooohhh…” His voice trailed off and Landon became nervous. He prayed that he wasn’t about to lose everything because he’d just announced that he was gay.

  “That’s really too bad, then,” Jeff said and Landon’s throat burned. Jeff sighed heavily. “I think you’d be perfect for my brother. If you weren’t leaving, I’d introduce you,” he explained and Landon practically melted with relief. Jeff shrugged then put his arm around Landon. “I guess it’s back to New York for you. Hang out for a few days so we can work out the details. I expect you to hit the ground running and get a team put together while we set up your new offices,” Jeff said and Landon nodded drunkenly as he processed everything.

  “Absolutely. You have no idea what this means to me. This is more than I ever dreamed was possible,” Landon said. “I can’t wait to get back and get to work,” he stated and Jeff clapped him on the back.

  “I knew you’d be a great fit. I’m just glad we finally know where we’re putting you,” Jeff said. “Let me introduce you to your very temporary receptionist and then we’ll get you in-processed. The sooner we get all of that taken care of, the sooner you can be on your way back.”

  “Hey,” Landon said as he fell onto the bed and loosened his tie. It had only been a few hours since he called to beg Ben’s forgiveness and promise he was going to survive. He still felt like hell but it was so much better than
when he first woke up. At 6:00, he wanted to die.

  “How was your first day?” Ben asked and Landon silently kicked his legs and fell back on the bed as a rush of giddy joy and relief poured through him. It was so hard not to laugh and excitedly spill all of the details. Instead, he sighed as he kicked his shoes off.

  “It didn’t go as I expected,” Landon said heavily. “Actually, I have something to tell you.” He listened as Ben sucked in a breath.

  “What is it?” His voice was flat and low. Landon cringed. He couldn’t drag this out.

  “I don’t want you to come out here,” he said and he heard Ben exhale hard. “I won’t be here, I’m coming back,” Landon explained and Ben gasped.

  “What? What do you mean?” He asked excitedly and Landon’s eyes filled with tears and his heart started to race.

  “I’m coming back, Ben!” He said loudly. “They’re giving me my own division. I’m going to be head of anime and I can set it up in New York. I don’t have to stay here,” Landon said and a strangled choking sound answered. “Ben?”

  “That’s incredible! I’m so happy for you!” Ben cried and Landon nodded as tears streamed down his face. Ben pulled in a shaky breath. “You’re coming back. I can’t believe it,” he whispered and Landon pressed his hand to his chest as heat spread through him.

  “I told him I couldn’t stay. I was going to turn down the job,” Landon said softly.

  “What?” Ben’s voice dropped.

  “I should have been happy but I was miserable. I realized that you meant more to me and I told him I couldn’t take the job,” Landon said and Ben groaned.

  “I would never have forgiven you,” he said and Landon rolled his eyes.

  “You would have. I would have found something else and I would have been happier because I was with you,” he said. “But Argus offered me a better job and now I get to come home,” Landon said and Ben laughed.

  “Come home. I love you,” he said and Landon shut his eyes as happiness and relief swelled within him.

  “I love you too. I’ll be back in a few days, I have to wrap up a few things here first,” he said and Ben sighed happily.

  “That’s the best news I’ve heard in months,” he said and Landon nodded in agreement. “Oh, shit,” Ben mumbled and Landon’s brows pulled together.

  “What?” He asked and Ben groaned.

  “We can’t live here. All of your stuff isn’t going to fit into my place,” he declared and Landon bit his lip to keep from laughing.

  “Are you suggesting we should live together?” He asked and Ben snorted.

  “There’s no point in us having separate places. I haven’t gotten used to sleeping without you and I don’t intend to,” Ben announced and Landon hummed happily.

  “Good. I don’t want to sleep alone anymore either and that ice bucket wasn’t cutting it,” he agreed.

  “So, you still have the number for that real estate agent?” Ben asked and Landon rolled his eyes.

  “I forgot how funny you are,” he mumbled and Ben laughed.

  “Fine. I guess we’ll use someone else,” Ben said and Landon sighed as he unbuttoned his shirt.

  “Let’s get a house,” he said. “Something we can grow into,” Landon added and Ben was silent for several moments.

  “What do you mean by ‘grow into’?” He asked and Landon pulled in his lips as he considered. He wasn’t totally sure. Before his interview with Argus, Landon had never given their future much thought.

  “I don’t know. Obviously, we’ll need room for my growing collection of gnomes,” he teased and Ben snorted. “Maybe we could get a yard so we could have a dog or two and host barbecues. Or, maybe we’ll want to have kids,” Landon said carefully and there was a soft gasp.

  “Do you want kids?” Ben asked and Landon shrugged.

  “I think so. I’ve never thought about having kids of my own. I love Molly and I’ve begged Lindsey to have more. I love kids but I’ve never been with anyone that I could see myself having a family with,” Landon said.

  “And you think you’ll want to have a family with me?” Ben asked and Landon didn’t really have to think about it.

  “Yeah. I want to have a family with you,” he said and Ben exhaled loudly.

  “I love you so much. I need you to come home,” he rasped and Landon ached to hold him.

  “I love you too. Is that a yes on the house and the family?” He asked and Ben chuckled.

  “Ask me when you get here,” he said and Landon groaned.

  “I’ll try to remember. I have a feeling I’m going to have other things on my mind,” he warned and Ben growled softly.

  “Why don’t you take your clothes off and we’ll FaceTime?” He suggested and Landon swung his legs over the side of the bed and was on his feet, shrugging out of his shirt and attacking the waist of his trousers.

  “Ok. Get naked and call me back,” he said as his pants slid down his legs.

  Chapter 26

  “I know it’s only been four days but you have no idea how good it feels to be able to touch you, to have you here in person,” Ben said as he twined his fingers with Landon’s as soon as the cab was driving them away from the airport. Landon grinned as he leaned close and pressed his lips to Ben’s.

  “You have no idea how good that feels,” he whispered and Ben was already thinking about how good something else was going to feel as soon as they were back at his place. “Marry me,” Landon said and Ben’s head pulled back as he searched Landon’s face.

  “Oh, Jesus! You don’t seem that drunk,” he said and Landon shook his head.

  “Haven’t had a drink all day. Or anything to eat. I’ve been too nervous and excited. Marry me,” he repeated and Ben fell back against the seat.

  “You’re really asking me?” He mumbled and Landon nodded as he raised their hands to his lips and kissed Ben’s hand.

  “I realized I should have asked before I left. I don’t ever want to be without you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Ben,” he said gently and Ben glared at the driver through the rear view mirror as he shamelessly stared back at them as they waited at a red light.

  “That’s so fast,” Ben murmured and Landon frowned.

  “Are you saying no?” He asked slowly and Ben shook his head.

  “I’m just saying it’s really fast,” he said and Landon smiled as he pulled Ben’s lips to his.

  “That’s worked really well for us, so far,” he said and Ben rolled his eyes.

  “We didn’t have a choice before,” he argued and Landon shook his head.

  “We did too! I gave you the choice the second night and you chose not to waste any time and we did everything on fast forward. And it worked,” he said and Ben cringed.

  “We had nothing to lose then and it only had to work for a few months. Marriage is supposed to be forever. And I’d want it to be forever with you,” Ben said and Landon grinned.

  “See. I want forever with you too,” he said as he tapped his forehead against Ben’s then pecked at his lips. “I’ve never felt like I really lost anything until I let go of you four days ago and didn’t know when I’d see you next. I don’t ever want to feel that again,” Landon said and Ben sighed as he fisted his hand in Landon’s shirt and pulled him closer. God, he smelled so fucking good and everything felt so perfect and right, now that Ben could feel him again.

  “We have time now,” Ben argued and Landon shook his head.

  “We don’t have to waste it though. I know that there isn’t going to be anyone else and I don’t want to spend another day of my life not belonging to you in every way and knowing that you’re mine too,” he said and Ben had to hold onto Landon as all the air left his body in a rush. How could he argue with that? Landon was right. He was perfect and he was offering Ben exactly what he had dreamt of.

  “Would you hurry up, we’re almost there,” the driver urged and Landon gestured toward the driver as he raised a br
ow at Ben.

  “You heard the man,” Landon teased and Ben gave them both stern looks before he sighed and threw his hands up.

  “Yes,” Ben said. “I’ll marry you,” he added as Landon grabbed the driver’s shoulder and shook it excitedly.

  “He said yes!” Landon said before he turned to Ben and gathered his face in his hands. “You said yes!” He whispered as his lips covered Ben’s. The kiss was perfect and tender as Landon’s tongue slid lazily around Ben’s until the car jerked to a halt.

  “Mazel tov!” The driver said loudly as he parked. “We’re here,” he said and Ben wasn’t sure if he wanted to punch the man or hug him.

  “I can’t wait to tell Michelle!” Landon said as he pushed the door open and offered Ben his hand. “Is she here?” He asked and Ben nodded as he shoved a wad of cash at the driver and took the handle of one of Landon’s suitcases.

  “Yeah,” he muttered. “Her and Jason were supposed to meet us for dinner. I can’t wait to tell her either but I wanted to be alone with you for a while,” Ben complained and Landon shook his head as they got in the elevator.

  “Nope. We tell them first then we’re not seeing anyone for a few days. I’m not going to dinner later. I’m not going anywhere that involves either of us in pants,” he said firmly and Ben felt his lips tilting into a grin. He was starting to like Landon’s plan much better.

  “Fine. We give them our news and then it’s sans pants for days,” he said and Landon nodded decisively.

  “If I don’t have your cock on or in some part of my body in ten minutes or less, we’re going to have a serious problem and I don’t plan to let it out of my sight any time soon.” The doors opened and Ben had to adjust the front of his pants before he could walk. He followed as Landon went to Michelle’s door and not his and knocked. Ben strategically stood behind the suitcase as the door opened and Michelle squealed as she reached for Landon. He hugged her tightly before kissing her forehead then set her away from him so he could give Jason a quick hug.