“Oh shit.” He laughed. “You don’t really think all of that was a ploy to get it for free, do you?”
“I hadn’t gotten that far—my thinking is still stuck in confusion.” Sighing, I stepped back a little to see it better because, honestly, it looked really great with the rest of his furniture and I was kind of proud. “Why is it here?”
“Do you like it?” He came up behind me and put his hands on my waist, his body barely touching mine. “I’m told the artist has others, if you want one. But be aware: they’re not cheap.”
“You bought it at the auction?”
“Yep.”
“If I knew you wanted it, I would’ve given it to you.”
“That would have been a poor business decision. Instead, you did a really good thing by giving it to the Bennett Foundation, and you should soon be getting a thank you letter that doubles as proof of the tax deduction.” He let go of me. “Um… Promise me something. Just say yes. It’s not illegal.”
“Is it about sex?”
“No, but I’d be happy to throw that in.”
“I’m not going to promise you anything without knowing what it is.” I wasn’t sure what he was hesitant to say. He didn’t get hesitant or uncomfortable—that was my department.
“I swear it has nothing to do with sex or any of the depraved things I want to do to you. Please?”
Oh hell, I wasn’t signing anything in blood. “Fine, I promise.”
“Cash the check.”
“What do you—?” Shit. I sighed and crossed my arms over my chest. “It’s in with the thank you letter?” When I opened that envelope, I knew I’d find a check with his name on it, written out for fifteen-hundred dollars.
“I saw your website, Lane. I almost started crying. Seriously, cash the check.”
“How much did you pay for it at the auction?”
“Six.”
Six made sense. “That’s pretty good. I didn’t actually expect anyone to pay fifteen-hundred dollars, but gallery owners are more likely to show your—”
“Thousand.”
My arms dropped to my sides, and I was silent for a second. Then I shouted, “Six thousand? Oh my god, you paid six thousand dollars for my table?”
“My table. I was almost outbid by some guy who didn’t deserve it—he’d probably put his feet up on it or use it for strippers. So I swooped in and took what was rightfully mine. I got mad skills with an auction paddle.” He raised his hand quickly as if he were pulling a gun and then dropped it just as quickly. “I’m kidding—it was a silent auction. But I’d be happy to show you my skill with a paddle. Really happy to show you.”
“Six thousand dollars.” The figure was doing circles in my mind. Even if Carson puffed up the price, it still meant other people would’ve paid something close to that. Six thousand dollars for a piece I made. All told, Carson had paid seventy-five hundred. For a piece of my art.
“I wish you’d been there to see the guy’s face when he realized he was a loser.” He drew out the word, belittling something that made me feel more supported than I ever had by anyone, including my parents.
“Did that really happen?” I asked quietly. “Was there really a guy you had to outbid?”
“No. There were two guys and three women I had to outbid.” He straightened and looked at me with a furrowed brow. “What’s wrong? Six thousand dollars is going to families who need it, and I love my new table. Why are you upset about it?”
Because even though money didn’t mean anything to him, and he’d refuse to believe he had done anything special, he’d validated my art and my dream and made me feel like I could do this. But I couldn’t tell him that because I’d probably start crying and getting all girlie.
“I’m not upset.” I shook it off before I scared him. “I’m in shock—a happy kind of shock.”
“I’m in a happy kind of shock for you. The bidding was tight. I didn’t want to tell you because then you’d be working more instead of paying attention to me.” He winked. “But your phone number might have accidentally slipped into a few of their hands. I would’ve given them your website address if yours wasn’t so humiliating. Which brings us back to… Cash the check.”
“It’s not a donation if you pay me.”
“Then call it something else. Or give me something else.” His gaze flew around my body. “Do you even have anything? I guess this will have to do.” He reached to my waist, yanked me towards him, and started undoing my belt.
“Carson, stop!” I backed up quickly, pushing him away. But he’d already gotten the buckle undone, and it stayed in his hand. “What are you doing?” I shoved him as hard as I could.
Time froze. He stood perfectly still, staring at the belt running from his hand to the last loop of my jeans. We both watched it come loose and fall.
“Buying your belt.” His voice was raspy and deeper than normal. Not like his real one at all. There was something so accepting about the look on his face. Like he’d been expecting something like this, known it was coming. But he’d misunderstood—I wasn’t afraid of him.
“For fifteen-hundred dollars,” he said. “It was lovely doing business with you.” He rolled it around his hand and walked towards the kitchen. “Want a drink?”
It wasn’t as if I thought he was going to do anything horrible. “Don’t be like this. I just thought—”
“I know what you thought,” he called. “Let’s leave it at that.”
“Carson!” I stood there for a second, frustrated, before hurrying into the kitchen. “I didn’t mean anything by it.”
“You thought I was trying to take off your clothes without your permission.” He shrugged. “Your reaction was exactly what it should’ve been.”
“Yeah, but I know you would never—”
“You didn’t think those guys would ever lie to you, cheat on you, or treat you like shit, either.”
“You would never hurt me like that.”
“No. Not like that.” He held out his hand, my belt wrapped around it multiple times. Tight. “But there are a lot of ways to hurt someone.” His eyes stayed on the belt for another moment before rising to meet mine.
I took his hand, slowly unwrapping the leather from around his fist and wrist. Once I had all of it, I put it in his open palm and curled his fingers around it, wanting more than anything to make him stop looking like he knew it was just a matter of time before one of us hurt the other. How had everything changed so quickly?
“Don’t you think fifteen-hundred dollars is a little too much for a belt?” I asked, smiling in the hopes he would too. “I’m sure you have something better than me—”
He squinted for a moment. “Better than you?”
“To spend your money on. You can’t buy a crappy belt for fifteen-hundred dollars.”
“I have a lot of money in a bank account with my name on it. That means I get to decide how I spend it and you don’t.”
This wasn’t how I wanted things to be—awkward and stiff.
“Hey.” I smacked him on the arm. “I just didn’t understand what you were doing.”
He nodded. “It’s okay.”
I paused, wondering if that was even a little bit true, knowing there wasn’t anything I could actually do about it. “You know what’s totally not okay? That you gave me crap for my business sense when you just paid fifteen-hundred dollars for a twenty-dollar belt.”
I waited for his eyes to go back to playful mode because then I’d know it really was okay. It didn’t take long. He was so good at pushing away anything he didn’t want to deal with, including himself.
“Yeah well, I got a great deal on a table recently, so I figure I’m about even.” He took out a bottle of wine. “Do you want something to drink or not?”
After a second of indecision, I hiked up my jeans and reached for two glasses. “I like that belt. I should’ve charged you more.”
My wine glass was half-empty again when he tossed me something. As soon as my hand closed aro
und it, I knew what it was.
“It’s just a key, so don’t be all girlie and read girlie things into it,” he said, flopping down on the couch. “I need you to keep an eye on my place. I get to go to Los Angeles tonight. Very exciting, because there’s nowhere I’d rather be trapped for a week than in a room full of lawyers, financial advisors, and Renee. Except with her fiancé and a wedding planner. Gee, I hope I get to do that, too.”
“Sounds horrible. But you realize you’re giving a key to someone you haven’t actually known all that long, right?”
“I’m gonna let you in on a little secret—you’re the most trustworthy person I know. By miles. If I asked any of my guy friends, the place would be completely trashed when I got home. If I gave it to any woman besides you, she’d read into it somehow.”
“What about Anna?”
He paused. “I don’t trust Anna.”
“Then I guess I’m the best person for the job. I’ll do it”—I tucked the key into my pocket—“but only if I get to take a bath in your tub.” He had literally the biggest bathtub I’d ever seen. Jets, a waterproof remote for the TV on the wall, Bluetooth speakers everywhere, built in cushions to lay your head on. All I had to do was not think of the women who’d used it with him.
“Great,” he muttered. “Now I’m going to spend a week in L.A. picturing you naked in my tub.”
“I’m sure you’ll find something to keep you entertained.” But nothing I wanted to think too much about.
“Do you know how to turn it on?”
After I shook my head, he headed into the bathroom, explaining where things were and what I shouldn’t touch. When hot water started pouring in, I couldn’t get the stupid grin off my face. Like I’d never seen running water before. But even when it was completely full, the bathtub in my apartment was only about eight inches deep and I could barely straighten my legs.
“I’m going to live in it,” I said. “Become a big prune. You’ll still be my friend if I look like a wrinkly old lady when you get back, won’t you?”
“Um…no,” he said. “But while I have your full attention, check this out.” When the water got high enough, he punched a button to turn on the jets.
My squeal wasn’t that loud, but he acted as if it was.
“You’re such a girl.”
When I reached down to feel the pressure of the jets, my other hand slipped off the edge and I fell forward, screaming. Carson grabbed me, only catching my leg. If the tub had been completely filled, my entire upper body would already be under. Although, between the depth of the water and the splash as I fell, I was still soaked. He tugged on my leg, but was laughing so hard he couldn’t lift me up.
“Stop laughing and get me out of here, you jerk!”
“Guess how badly I want to let go right now.” If he did, even just to get a better grip, I’d go in. Thankfully, he put hand over hand, climbing up my leg, over my knee, going higher. When his hand reached my inner thigh, he let go with his other to get more leverage, then once he had me he adjusted his other hand.
Even though at this point he could’ve easily pulled me out, he didn’t move. “Hmm…” Now I knew why—because of what he was holding onto. One hand was on my ass and the other holding the side of my breast. It was awkward and I was drenched, but part of me wanted to fall in and pull him in with me. Stop caring so much about limits and rules and dos and don’ts. Just enjoy getting messy for a little while.
He cleared his throat and asked, “You ready?”
God, yes. I got a little wet and all the wondering and worrying about what to do had become completely moot. My body made the decision for me. No thinking and no planning. Thankfully, I stopped myself before I screamed out ‘yes,’ opting for something a little more vague just in case I came to my senses in the next few seconds.
“Probably.”
Chapter 16 - Carson
Probably?
I knew Lane had misunderstood me because her lips parted and she didn’t take her eyes off my mouth, other than a brief glance at my cock. But she was still pretty horizontal, and if I didn’t pull her up soon, the laws of physics were going to kick in, and we’d both go into the water.
Probably. What did that mean? I should probably kiss her. If I was really lucky, it would probably go further. Hopefully all the way to where I definitely wanted to be. Or was it just that I should probably get her out of the bath before we both fell in?
Then, even if I begged for more, would the ‘probably’ turn back into a ‘no’?
Fuck, ‘probably’ could mean anything. I straightened, keeping her in my arms, as close as I could even though she was sopping wet. I watched her expression, recognized it because I’d seen it on a lot of women’s faces.
But Lane’s was different—it was hers. And I wanted to make sure I saw it constantly because knowing she trusted me was… I’m not sure anyone had ever trusted me before, not in the way she did. And it made me feel—
Drop the sap and stick to what I’m good at.
I shook off the weird connective element and focused on the physical. That’s what I wanted. Just the physical. I moved slowly, knowing she could balk at any moment, and I’d have to take my hands off her. I’d gotten hard the second I grabbed her ass, and I was only getting harder. She had to feel me. And she stayed in my arms long after she had to.
“Are you ready for this?” I asked again, knowing she’d understand and praying she’d say—
“Yes.”
My lips were on hers instantly, my hand moving lower on her ass and pulling her tighter to me. I’d stop if she said stop but I was going to go for as long as she let me. I’d never wanted a woman even close to this much before. Probably because she’d made me wait so damn long. Her hands went around my neck, and she moaned into my mouth. So I took the opportunity to deepen the kiss.
Wait. Maybe I should slow down. I didn’t want to slow down. Honestly, I was torn. If I didn’t say anything, we could be together now and all the damage would come out later. And later was really far from now. But if I said what I should say, she might want to stop.
Shit. I didn’t want to, but if we didn’t make things clear right now, it was never going to happen. Any second my brain would turn off and let my cock take over.
Not too slow, just enough to be able to speak in between swipes of lips or tongue.
“How you doing?” I asked.
She made a noise I’d never actually heard before. Something in between what she sounded like when she ate chocolate and the sigh she made whenever the couple finally got together in one of those horrible movies she made me watch.
God, she felt good. Everywhere, every part of her that was in contact with any part of me felt so fucking good.
“Lane, tell me you’re doing okay.” Both of us were in uncharted territory. She’d never handed herself over to an idiot she didn’t have feelings for, and I’d never been this close to sleeping with someone I knew even moderately well and liked a hell of a lot.
In my experience, there was a point when the flirting and conversation went on too long, crossing from “I really want to get you under me” territory into the “I really want to get to know you” zone. Lane and I were way past that point. I was counting on us being so far beyond that point that things had looped around again. But that was somewhere I’d never dared go.
She still hadn’t answered.
I pulled away from her, catching her chin in my hand to hold her back. “Talk to me. No emotions, right?”
“Right.” Is there anything sexier than a breathless woman? “Am I not allowed to like you, either?”
“You can like me all you want, as long as you remember this is nothing more than two people who can make each other feel good.”
“You keep saying that, but I have yet to see any proof you can actually do it.”
“Oooh, you have no idea what you’re in for.”
Her eyes flashed wide, and her fists went limp and fell from my collar. “We’ll go slowly, right?�
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“Yeah.” I caught her hands and put them back around my neck where they belonged, waiting until she understood their place before I let go. “As long as we’re going in the right direction, we can go as slowly as you want. What’s my stopping point gonna be?”
“No sex. Not now, and later...”
“No sex now. Got it. We’ll figure out later when it comes.”
“I’m all wet.” That’s hot.
When her arms slid off my shoulders again, I cursed, the word drawn out until I understood what she was doing.
She pulled up her soaking shirt, exposing her smooth, curvy, feminine belly and waist. When the shirt got stuck on her shoulders and she couldn’t get it over her head, I helped. Her pants were next. I helped with those too. Shoes came off with them.
Beautiful.
“Not yet, okay?”
“Huh?” I yanked my eyes away from her body. “Sorry, lost focus there for a minute.”
“Sex. Not right away. Is that okay with you?”
“It’s your call, Lane. I’ll take whatever’s offered.” Was my look of disappointment as bad as I thought it was? “We’d better stay away from the bed and the couch though.” I was only so strong, and lying on top of her would pretty much negate all of it.
“And the shower.”
I loved her mind. I really did. “Okay, that means we could go table or counter or wall. Lots of possibilities here, Lane. Pick one.”
“Whatever’s closest.”
Deep breath. “You said slow, right? If I forget, just smack me.” I scooped her up into my arms and carried her to the door, my feet momentarily getting wrapped up in the pile of her wet clothes.
When we got to the doorway, she shouted. “Carson, stop! The bath!”
“Shit.” I turned around just as the water crested the edge of the tub and poured down the sides. I looked at the woman in my arms with regret for another second before cursing, putting her down, and running to turn off the faucet.
“Okay, where were we?” Just about to get to the good stuff.
Darker Water Page 13