Even though no one has acknowledged it, I’m suddenly wondering if this man could be Roan’s father. My mind cartwheels as I keep the smile firmly locked in place. Quickly I reach my hand out towards Linc. “It’s really nice to meet both of you.”
“You, too.” Linc smiles easily, his eyes looking just a bit mischievous. “So you and Roan were having dinner together, huh?”
As soon as he says the words, heat fills my cheeks. “Um… yeah…” not knowing what else to say, I hastily tack on, “we’re neighbors.” But now my mouth is going and I can hear myself talking. Because I’m nervous, I start to babble. “And partners for a class project.” Both of their smiles stretch wider which leaves me feeling desperate. “We’re just friends,” I suddenly blurt. I seriously want to kick Roan for leaving me to twist in the proverbial wind over here.
“What class do you have together?”
Since Roan doesn’t seem like he’s going to be contributing anything further to the conversation, I answer, “Business ethics.”
“That sounds like an interesting class.”
“Extremely.” Well… I might be overstating things a bit, but whatever. I feel like I’m drowning over here. And still Roan is just standing there silently.
Finally Daniel claps Roan on the shoulder. “Well, I guess we should get going. It was certainly nice running into you. I was actually going to give you a call on the weekend. We were hoping you might be able to make it over for dinner next Wednesday night.”
Since he’s barely said anything the entire time we’ve been standing here, I’m wondering if he’ll even respond. Finally he says, “As long as it’s after six, that shouldn’t be a problem.”
Again I’m hit with just how similar they look when Daniel smiles. “Great.”
Linc’s eyes slide to mine before one side of his mouth quirks up. Even though I’ve just met the man, I’m thinking a look like that means trouble… “And you can bring your friend if you want.” He gives me a little wink and I want to melt into the pavement of the parking lot we’re standing in.
What’s worse is that Roan says absolutely nothing in response. Oh my god, now I really want the earth to open up and swallow me whole.
We all say goodbye before Daniel and Linc disappear around the corner towards Peppino’s Pizzeria. Roan hits the key fob and the locks on his SUV automatically unlatch. Silently he opens the backdoor of the truck, setting the two boxes of pizza on the seat as I climb into the front before slamming the door shut.
A few moments later, he slides in next to me. Even though he starts up the truck, he doesn’t pull out of the crowded parking lot. He just lets it run. Because I’m not sure if I should say anything or not, I just sit there quietly besides him as he stares out the windshield. I’m not usually a fidgety person, but I can’t help twisting my hands together waiting for him to finally say something.
I want him to make sense of what just happened back there. I’ve never seen Roan shut down like that before. It was weird.
Because the silence is stretched so tautly between us, it doesn’t take long for it to become oppressive. And it’s never like that. There have been times when the sexual tension simmering in the air feels so charged and heavy that I want to jump his bones. There have also been times when I’ve wanted to slap him upside the head because of some inappropriate comment he’s made, but there has never been this kind of strangling tension sitting uncomfortably between us.
I hate it.
Part of me just wants to reach out and comfort him even though I have no idea why it’s necessary. But I can’t deny the feelings are there, swirling and building within me.
I know something is weighing heavily on his mind. I also realize it has everything to do with the two men we just ran into. Before I can overthink it, I gently place my hand on his powerful thigh. He blinks a few times before glancing down at it. Just when I start to wonder if I should pull it away, he covers my hand with his own.
“That was your dad, wasn’t it?” My words are softly spoken because I’m not quite sure how he’s going to react. I mean, it must be a big deal to him or he wouldn’t be acting like this.
He jerks his head at my words. “Yeah.” Inhaling a deep breath, he forces it out slowly. “He’s gay.”
Unsurprised, I nod my head before admitting, “I figured.”
“Linc’s a really good dude,” he adds quickly, as if I might, for some reason, think differently.
“He seemed very nice. They both did.” Almost offhandedly I ask, “Your parents are divorced?”
“Um, yeah,” he shifts uncomfortably in the black leather seat, “when I was about fourteen, my dad dropped the bomb that he was gay.” His eyes slide back to the windshield again before adding more quietly, “That he’d always been gay. And that he was leaving because he couldn’t live a lie anymore.”
“That must have been really difficult.” More like devastating. Having your parents split up is hard enough without adding the extra layer of one of them being gay.
“Yeah. It was.”
I’m not sure if I should ask any more questions. Obviously this is a touchy subject for him. “Are you two close?”
His eyes finally slide back to mine. He searches them carefully before continuing, “We weren’t always. It really sucked when he first told us. I didn’t get it.” He shakes his head as if to emphasize his words. “Like at all. The whole thing just pissed me off and I didn’t want to be around him for a long time. Years. It took me a while to accept that he was still the same guy he’d always been. The one I’d worshipped while growing up.” Inhaling a deep breath, he continues, “Once I was able to wrap my head around the fact that he was still the same guy, we were able to move past it.”
I can’t even begin to imagine what that was like for him. An adolescent boy learning his father was gay... It couldn’t have been easy.
Not that I’ve cyberstalked Roan (okay, maybe a teeny tiny bit), but I have tooled around on the website dedicated to all things Roan King. I don’t remember seeing anything about his parents or that his father was gay. Which is kind of surprising, because it seems like everything else regarding his life is out there for the world to view, share, and comment upon.
The reason for that suddenly occurs to me.
“No one knows, do they?”
Once again his eyes cut to mine as the sun sets in front of us. Even though I normally enjoy watching the sun dip beneath the horizon, I’m way too focused on Roan to appreciate it. “No. They don’t know anything about my father.”
Curiosity has me asking, “How have you managed to keep it a secret? Your life seems to be an open book. You can’t go anywhere without pictures turning up or information being splashed across a website.”
He jerks his big shoulders into a tight, almost defensive shrug. “It was never a concerted effort on my part to hide it. But by the same token, it just didn’t seem like anybody else’s business either.” Yanking off his ball cap, he plows his fingers through his dark unruly hair before slapping it back in place. “He’s gay and lives with his partner. After he came out, he never tried covering it up or hiding who he was, but he isn’t the type of guy to ram it down your throat either. It’s just one piece of who he is. It doesn’t make up the totality of him. Just like me being heterosexual isn’t the only thing that defines me. I’m a lot of other things as well.”
He blows out another lengthy breath. “I know exactly what the media will do if they get ahold of this. It’ll become the focal point instead of my talent and skill. I don’t need that shit going into the draft. My dad is an architect and he’s a damn good one. He owns his own firm. Once it’s out there, every time someone makes the connection between us, that’s exactly what will be uppermost in their minds. Not him being great at what he does, but that he’s gay. If I were just a twenty-two year old guy looking to get a job in business after college, no one would give a crap about it. But like you said before,” his eyes burn into mine, “I’m not anonymous. And everything t
hat’s put out there about me seems to get overblown. Neither one of us needs or wants that.”
I can’t help but squeeze his thigh as he finally runs out of words. “Not everything about your life needs to be made public.” I think about the pictures of us that were posted and all the ugly comments. Even though being gay is nothing to be ashamed of, I also realize that not everyone is accepting. It’s no one else’s business if his father is gay. And it should be a non-issue even if people do find out about it.
Nodding his head, he finally puts the truck into gear. “We should probably get going. I still have some studying to plow through tonight.”
“Okay.”
As he pulls out into traffic, I can’t help but stare at him. Roan has a really strong profile. Even though his ball cap is still in place, I see the vibrant turquoise color of his eyes as he focuses on the road. His nose is straight, his lips full. His face is all chiseled angles and planes.
My heart actually skips a beat as I sit there quietly studying him.
Just when I feel like I’ve got a firm grasp on who I think Roan is, something happens to totally change it. And every time it shifts, I’m surprised to realize that I like him even more than I thought I did.
Chapter Twenty-One
The sexiest man at Barnett seems to be spending an awful lot of time with a tall willowy brunette. And yes… she’s the very same girl who has been previously photographed with him. Who the heck is this girl and how has she managed to capture his attention so completely??? Am I the only one who feels as if the world has completely fallen off its axis??? KingOfCampus.Com
Lying in bed, I can’t seem to fall asleep. Everything I learned about Roan tonight keeps churning in my head. Even though I’m tired, sleep still won’t come. I’ve spent the last twenty minutes debating whether or not to shoot him a quick text.
He was unusually quiet when we parted ways outside my apartment. I was thinking he might want to come in and talk some more but when I hinted around at it, he didn’t seem too interested. And I kind of hated myself for the disappointment that surged through every cell of my being when we finally said good night before I quietly shut the door, leaving him alone on the other side.
I’ve composed about eight different text messages to him before erasing each and every one. I mean, it’s not like we’re going out or anything. I think it’s already been established that a relationship between us isn’t going to work. But we are kind of friends… right? And friends checkup on each other…. So, that being said, maybe I should just make sure he’s okay.
Grabbing the pillow from under my head with both hands, I yank it over my face before screaming into it. I’m seriously starting to drive even myself crazy with this ridiculousness. And it’s so unlike me, I almost can’t stand it.
After a few contemplative moments, I throw the pillow off my head before pouncing on the phone. Before I can give myself too much time to think, because if I do, I’ll keep on waffling and drive myself mad, I quickly stab in the words. Then I hit send before collapsing onto my bed and huffing out a great big breath of air.
Ridiculous.
I am acting totally ridiculous.
And I hate it.
This isn’t me. I’m not one of these silly girls who obsesses about a boy or stalks them around campus. Unfortunately, I seem to be doing a damn good impression of one.
When my phone doesn’t immediately ping with an incoming message, I nibble at my lower lip. Well, what did I really expect? It’s midnight. He’s probably sleeping. And I am acting like a total loser.
A Roan King groupie.
Ouch…
That stings.
Both my pride and my sensibilities.
Just as I grab my pillow from the floor where I’ve thrown it, my phone finally dings. And yeah, I all but fall on it in my haste.
I’m fine. Thanks for asking.
Is he really fine? Does he want to talk for a while? Do guys even like talking when something is bothering them? I have no idea. I don’t remember spending a lot of time with Finn talking about stuff.
But still, I can’t resist asking…
Do you want to talk?
One minute, then two slowly tick by. When there’s no response after three angst filled minutes, I carefully set my phone back on the nightstand before rolling over and curling up into a ball. Then I squeeze my eyes tightly shut hoping that sleep will finally come now that I’ve reached out to him.
A light knock on our apartment door has my eyes flying open and me jumping out of bed because I know it has to be Roan. I mean, who the heck else would it be? Racing to the door, I quickly yank it open. And there he is on the other side, looking just as rumpled as I probably do. Although Roan looks decidedly sexy in a pair of low slung athletic shorts and nothing else.
Nothing.
Else.
Cue the saliva.
I gulp as my eyes crawl over the wide expanse of his naked chest.
Holy hell but he’s gorgeous...
In much the same way I’ve just checked him out, his eyes skim over me and I’m suddenly reminded of the fact that I’m wearing a body hugging tank top and boy shorts panties. A chill sweeps through me as my nipples harden into fine little points. When his gaze slowly meanders its way back up to mine, heat fills my cheeks at his obvious perusal.
“Looking good, Ivy. Thanks for the invite.”
Not knowing what else to say, I roll my eyes before grabbing his hand and dragging him into the apartment. Quickly I bolt the door before we head straight back to my room. As I pass by Lexie’s closed door, I can’t help but wonder what happened with the pregnancy test. I’m sure they must have come out while I was gone, but the door was firmly closed when I returned from dinner and I didn’t want to disturb them. I figure Lexie will tell me what happened when I see her tomorrow.
It’s softly that I close my bedroom door before turning to Roan who has already made himself comfortable on my bed. He’s totally stretched out on my side of the mattress next to the nightstand table. Even though it’s dark, with only moonlight to filter in through the window I still haven’t bothered to buy a shade for, I cock a brow.
“When I said- do you want to talk, it wasn’t code for- do you want to have sex.” Because if that’s what he thinks is going to be happening, then I’ll be kicking him out on his ass.
Unfazed by my sharp tone, he chuckles before patting the sheets next to him. “Jesus Christ, Ivy, I’m not interested in boning you.”
Oh... My brows draw together as I wrap my mind around those words. “You’re not?”
He laughs softly at my confusion. “Alright, allow me to rephrase that- I’m not interested in boning you tonight. Tomorrow we can go back to me wanting to get you naked.”
Snorting, I hesitantly make my way towards the bed. And a very sexy Roan who’s lying on it. “That is so damn romantic. You just make my heart go pitter patter all day long.”
Since he doesn’t seem to be moving from what is technically my spot, I have to crawl over him to get to the other side. His big hands graze the sides of my body before finding my hips. When I’m practically straddling him, he holds me firmly in place so I can’t move.
“Is that what you want, Ivy?” His words are decidedly husky and my belly hollows out in response. “Romance?”
My mouth instantly dries at the notion. There’s no way in hell I’d ever be able to resist him if he were to turn on that kind of charm. I would be putty in his hands. Even though it’s dark, his turquoise eyes are still piercing. They skewer me in place, making it difficult to breathe.
When I don’t say anything in response, his grip finally slackens, allowing me to scamper over him to the other side. Now that I’m here, I’m not quite sure how to position myself. My bed is a double and when I’m in it all by myself, it’s plenty big. With Roan filling it, it feels teeny tiny.
So I scooch over as far as I can. Just as I get settled so that no part of me is touching him, and I’m all but pressed up against the
wall, Roan slides an arm around my body before hauling me against him and holding me there.
After a few moments, he whispers, “Relax.”
“I’m totally relaxed,” I squeak, feeling anything but. My body is as rigid as a two by four.
“Yeah, you feel completely relaxed,” he chuckles, “I came here to talk. Nothing more. Okay?”
Hearing those words has my stiff-as-a-board body slowly unlocking before cautiously molding itself to his muscular frame. After a few minutes of adjustment, I find myself turned completely towards him, aligned with every hard part of his body. With his arm still wrapped around me, my head slowly lowers to rest against the solidness of chest. Releasing a slow breath, my hand finally settles over his heart.
“Comfortable?” Again there’s a huskiness woven through the melodic tone of his voice that has something hot sliding its way through me.
“Yeah.” I’m so relaxed I probably won’t want to move ever again. He feels so damn good. I probably shouldn’t be enjoying this as much as I am. Even though I’m all but dying to run my hand over his broad chest and tight abs, I don’t. It’s been a really long time since I’ve been this close to someone. And I miss it. Miss the intimacy of it.
“Good.” He pauses before adding quietly, “Thanks for inviting me over.”
Even though darkness swirls around us making it hard to see, I can’t help but glance up at his face trying to read his expression. He tips it down towards me. “You were really quiet on the ride home. I was worried,” I finally admit.
Turning his face from mine, he stares up at the ceiling for a long moment before saying, “Yeah. Sorry about laying all that on you.”
“You don’t have anything to apologize for.” I’m not going to lie, I like that he trusts me enough to share the private details of his life with me. I get the feeling he doesn’t trust many people and I’m absurdly flattered that, for some reason, I’m one of them.
He doesn’t immediately fill the silence between us but that doesn’t matter. What we have right now feels easy and comfortable.
King of Campus Page 20