Light Switch

by Lauren Gallagher

It was still alien, that was for sure. Something new, something different. But it had long since left the realms of uncomfortable “No, it’s not.”

  “Do you want me to keep doing this, or should I put the condom on?” His tone was gentle, the question genuine. This wasn’t a game.

  I took a breath. Was I ready for this? Hell, I’d come this far. Do it now before you lose your nerve.

  “Krissy?”

  “I—” The words were there. Somewhere. Probably lost amidst the neurons that were trying to process all the intense, new sensations.

  He started to withdraw his fingers. “Krissy, talk to me.”

  I grabbed the condom off the table and held it over my shoulder for him. He hesitated, then took it from me. He withdrew his fingers, and for the second time tonight, the sharp sound of tearing foil made me shiver with anticipation. With every heartbeat, excitement pushed the fear aside. I wanted this. Yes, I wanted this. Before tonight, I’d never had any desire to try it. Every thought I’d ever had of anal sex was one of either fear or disgust, if not both, but if Scott didn’t get that condom on in the next few seconds, I was going to come unglued.

  The lube bottle clicked once, then again. When he set it on the table a few inches away from me, my heart pounded. This is it. I’m doing this. He put some lube on me with his fingers, sliding them in and out a few times to make sure there was enough.

  “Just remember,” he whispered as he pressed his cock against me, “if you want to stop, just say the word.”

  With that, he pressed the head of his cock a little harder. As I had with his fingers, I pushed back, and a second later, he slid into me. He gave me no more than an inch, if that, but the sensations were overwhelming. I fought just to breathe as my body tried to comprehend if it hurt, if it was simply strange, if it was pleasure.

  He pulled out, then pushed in again, further this time. With every stroke, he moved a little deeper.

  I completely lost myself in his smooth, even strokes. Some time probably passed. I didn’t know. All I knew was how Scott moved inside me and how this felt progressively less strange and more pleasurable. Pain—or the fear thereof—was a distant memory.

  Eventually, he stopped, pulling out partway as he reached for the lube. The bottle clicked, then again, and he dropped it beside us. When he pushed in this time, his cock slid easily into me.

  “How does that feel?” he asked.

  “Good,” was all I could manage. The word didn’t even begin to describe it. Even if I couldn’t come this way—and I doubted I would—it was incredible. Beyond the physical sensations, it was the thrill of confronting something that had always made me nervous, of trusting Scott enough to do this.

  “Is this speed okay?” he asked. “Or do you want me to go faster?”

  “A little faster.”

  His hand gently ran up and down my waist. “Are you sure?”

  I nodded. He took a breath and gave me a little more. Then a little more. He was nowhere near as fast and violent as he was when he fucked my pussy, but it took my breath away just the same.

  “You all right?” he asked.

  Another nod, the only response I could manage.

  “Tell me if I’m going too fast. Is this okay?”

  Again, words failed me, so again, I simply nodded.

  “Fuck, baby, that’s perfect,” he breathed, almost groaning. “Oh God, you’re…” His hands tightened on my hips. “You feel amazing, Kristen.” He faltered, breaking his rhythm for a second before picking up speed again. “Just tell me if it’s too much.”

  It was too much. Just like every time he fucked me, every time he drove me to the edge and held me there until I was a breath away from insanity, it was too much, and still I couldn’t get enough.

  Gripping the side of the table, I pushed back, meeting his thrusts, and his throaty groan made my breath catch.

  “Oh fuck, oh fuck, I—” He pulled my hips against him and shuddered, releasing sharp, uneven breaths. When his orgasm had passed, he exhaled and slumped over me. He caught himself with one hand on the massage table and rested his forehead on my shoulder.

  Eventually, he lifted his head and kissed the side of my neck. “You okay?”

  “Mm-hmm.”

  Nuzzling my neck, he whispered, “That was fucking incredible. I can honestly say this is not what I expected tonight.”

  “That makes two of us.”

  He gasped as he pulled out slowly. As he stepped away to take care of the condom, I turned around and leaned on the table, pulling the blanket around my shoulders again.

  He came back and sat beside me. “What changed your mind about it, anyway?”

  I shrugged. “Like I said, everything tonight piqued my sense of adventure.”

  “Fair enough. It caught me by surprise, I’ll tell you that.”

  “You’re not the only one.” I touched his face, running the pad of my thumb across his cheekbone. It had caught me by surprise. Before tonight, I’d never wanted to try it at all. But before tonight, I’d never trusted anyone as much I trusted Scott. Now, it seemed absurd to put any limits on the things I’d do with him.

  And that, more than a threesome with a pair of Doms or anal sex, scared me.

  He pulled me closer and kissed my forehead. “Think this is something you’d want to do again?”

  “I don’t know,” I said. “It’s different.”

  “In a good way or a bad way?”

  “Neither, really. Just…different. I don’t know if I’d try it—” I hesitated, the words “with anyone but you” stopping at the tip of my tongue. Maybe it was simply because it was so new, but I couldn’t imagine trying it, let alone initiating it, with anyone other than Scott.

  “Krissy?”

  I shrugged again. “I guess we’ll have to see. But I might be willing to try it again.”

  “Well, if you find yourself willing to try it again in the future, do let me know.”

  “I will.”

  He smiled. “What do you say we grab a shower and head back out into civilization?”

  “Sounds good to me.”

  Chapter 21

  “Full house, fuckers.” Jim laid his cards on the table. “Read ’em and weep.”

  “Son of a bitch.” Steve shook his head and threw his hand down, revealing two pair. Sighing, he looked at me. “What about you, Locke?”

  “Oh. I—” I looked at my cards, blinking a few times. Until Jim had put his hand down, I’d forgotten I was even part of the game. It took me a second to run the cards through my mind and figure out what hand I had. Finally, I laid them down. “Two pair.” The guys and I looked at Matt, who absently tapped his fingers on the edge of the table.

  “Sommers?” Steve waved his hand in front of Matt’s face.

  Matt jumped. “What? Sorry.” He cleared his throat and looked at his hand.

  Jim grinned. “Got anything that beats a full house?”

  Matt fanned his cards, staring at them with a look that mirrored my own momentary lack of comprehension. Was his mind wandering like mine had been? And had it wandered to the same place? I squirmed in my chair.

  Then he came to life, gloating as he dropped his cards on top of Jim’s. “Four of a kind, bitch. Pay up.”

  “Oh, Goddammit,” Jim muttered.

  Matt laughed and pulled the pile of chips to his side of the table. Our eyes met briefly, and my face burned. I’d thought—hoped—his mind was in the same place as mine, but evidently it was just a different poker face than usual.

  Whatever was on his mind, there was only one thing on mine. He’d returned from his trip sometime last night, but I’d been out, and we hadn’t yet had the opportunity to get into bed. I needed him. Fucking hell, I needed him.

  “Ante up,” Steve said, “and let’s see if we can keep some of the chips from heading toward Sommers, okay?”

  “You guys didn’t let him win again, did you?” Kevin asked, craning his neck from the other table.

  “Let me win?” Ma
tt snorted. “Please. Not my fault these guys don’t have my mad skills.”

  “Yeah, right.” Jim shot him a good-natured glare. “How about we check your sleeves for cards?”

  “Whatever,” Matt said. “Okay, who’s dealing the next hand?”

  “You are, cheater.” Steve set the deck in front of Matt.

  Matt cut the deck and shuffled it.

  “Ante up,” Jim said, tossing a five-dollar chip into the center of the table. Steve, Matt, and I did the same. Then Matt dealt the cards.

  I picked up my hand. Two kings and an ace, the latter of which was wild. Definitely a good start. I laid my cards facedown on the table and watched my opponents’ faces. The subtle furrow of Jim’s brow told me he wasn’t happy with his hand. Steve had a rock solid poker face, not a single twitch or flicker to give anything away.

  I looked at Matt. He looked right back at me. I couldn’t even remember what game we were playing.

  I absently licked my lips, and he pulled in a sharp breath before clearing his throat and focusing on his cards again.

  “I bet five,” Steve said, tossing a five-dollar chip into the pot.

  “I’ll—” I paused. What was my hand again? I looked at my cards. Two kings and an ace. Right. “Call.” I put another five in the pot.

  Jim scowled, then pursed his lips, then scowled again. After a moment, he shook his head and laid his cards down. “Fold.”

  Matt looked at his own hand and chewed his lip. He drummed his fingers on the table. Finally, he put five in the pot with a muttered “Call.” He turned to Steve. “How many?”

  “Two.” Steve slid two cards to Matt, who dealt two off the top of the deck and handed them to him.

  Matt looked at me. “What do you want, Kristen?”

  My mouth went dry when our eyes met. You know exactly what I want, Matt.

  He muffled a cough. “How many cards?”

  “Oh. Right.” I shook my head. “Two, please.” I took two from my hand and slid them across to him. When he handed me two in return, his finger brushed the side of mine. Our eyes met again. The playful lift of the corner of his mouth told me that, oh yes, it was deliberate.

  Trying to focus on the game, as opposed to how badly I wanted Matt to put me over the table and fuck me, I picked up my cards. Three kings, a three, and a ten. I blinked. Where the hell was my ace?

  Shit. In my moment of distraction, I’d traded in the ace instead of the three. I let out a breath, hoping my frustration wasn’t evident to anyone else. I would have had four of a kind if I’d been paying attention. Now I was stuck with a three of a kind.

  I looked at Matt. The playful grin had turned into a scowl. He muttered something under his breath, and when our eyes met, his cheeks colored.

  “I’m out.” Steve put his hand down.

  I chewed my lip and tried to gauge Matt’s reaction. He usually had a hell of a poker face, but he could bluff like no one else. Frustrated grumbling could indicate a pair of fours as easily as it could mask a royal flush.

  “I’ll put in another five.” I dropped the chip into the middle of the table.

  Matt did the same. “Show ‘em.”

  I laid my hand on the table. “We three kings of Orient are—”

  “No match for my full house.” He tossed the cards down, face-up.

  “You bastard.” I laughed.

  “Who the hell gave you permission to win again, Sommers?” Kevin said. “You three are really letting me down over there.”

  Matt just laughed and passed the deck to Jim before collecting his winnings.

  “Well, before I get my ass handed to me again,” I said. “I could use a refill.” I rose, picking up my empty glass. “Anyone else?”

  “Bring me another Coors, would you?” Steve said.

  “Bring me another Coors, please, Neanderthal.” Lynette glared over her shoulder at him.

  Steve made a flippant gesture. “Yeah, yeah, yeah.”

  “Watch it, Keller, or I’ll bring you a Corona,” I said.

  “Okay, okay!” He put his hands up. “Please bring me another Coors.”

  I laughed and went into the kitchen. As soon as I cleared the doorway, I paused to take a breath. While it was true I needed another drink, I also came in here to get away from Matt for a moment.

  It had only been a little over a week. And it wasn’t like I’d been lacking when it came to sex. I’d been with Scott all but one of the last few nights, plus two nights with him and Byron. Between the two of them, it was a miracle I could walk.

  And still, I ached for Matt. For everything Scott could do to me, the one thing he couldn’t satisfy was my need for Matt, and vice versa.

  I pulled an ice tray out of the freezer. As I twisted it, the cracking ice was almost loud enough to muffle the footsteps behind me. I took a breath and hoped to God it was Ramona coming to give me the third degree about something. I hoped it was her, but I knew from the prickling in my nerve endings that it wasn’t.

  “Whatever you’re drinking,” Matt’s voice made me shiver. “Make it two.”

  “I was just having another Coke.” The words trembled, as did my hands. As I dropped a few ice cubes into my glass, he put his hands on my waist.

  “I don’t know about you,” he whispered, putting his arms around me, “but I am just not in the mood for cards tonight.”

  “So what are you in the mood for?”

  “You.” He turned me around and kissed me. My knees buckled, and I grabbed the counter for support as his tongue found mine. None of our poker buddies knew about us, but anyone in the world could have walked in just then and I wouldn’t have cared.

  Matt broke the kiss, panting against my lips for a moment. “I’ve been dying to fuck you again,” he breathed, dipping his head to kiss my neck, “and ever since you walked in tonight, I’ve been too goddamned horny to think straight.”

  I licked my lips. “Doesn’t seem to be affecting your game.”

  He laughed, the warm rush of breath slipping under my collar. “I’ve gotten lucky.”

  “I think you’re trying to get lucky.”

  “Is it working?”

  “You’d better believe it.”

  He raised his head. “Why don’t we get out of here, then?”

  “What about them?” I gestured at the hallway leading back into the living room.

  “What about them?”

  I shrugged. “We should at least be discreet. I don’t care if they know we’re sleeping together, but I’d just as soon not advertise that’s why we’re leaving.”

  He laughed softly. “In that case, I’ll go first. You stay for another hand, then meet me at my place.”

  “And you honestly think I can concentrate enough to get through a hand when I know you’re upstairs waiting for me?”

  He ran his thumb across my lower lip. “You mean as much as I’ve been able to concentrate all evening with you sitting across from me?”

  “Bullshit.”

  He tilted his head and leaned closer. “Trust me, darlin’,” he murmured, letting his lip brush mine. “It was all luck, because I haven’t been able to—”

  “Hey! I don’t hear any beer-fetching in there,” Jim called. Matt and I quickly separated, and a moment later, Jim appeared in the doorway. “Come on, we’re ready to deal.”

  “Sorry, sorry,” I said. “I was trying to show Matt how to work the ice trays.”

  Matt’s jaw dropped. “What? You—”

  “Well, I can see why you were taking so long, then.” Jim chuckled. “A bit complicated for someone like him, I think.”

  “Whatever,” Matt said. “You’re just jealous because I keep winning.”

  “Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Jim said. “Now hurry up. We’re all waiting on you two.”

  Matt pulled up his sleeve and glanced at his watch. “Actually, I’d better bail.”

  “What’s wrong?” Jim asked. “Did all that winning just take too much out of you?”

  “Damn right.” Ma
tt feigned a yawn. “And if I win much more, all the money will be too heavy to haul upstairs.”

  “Oh, shut up.” I elbowed him.

  “Well, whatever,’ Jim said. “Come on, Sommers, I’ll cash you out. Kristen, we’re about ready to deal.”

  “Be there in a second.” I opened a can of Coke.

  As I poured my drink, Matt followed Jim out of the kitchen. Before he disappeared down the hall, he gave me one last glance over his shoulder and winked. I almost dropped the Coke can.

  After Matt left, a few people shifted around, and Lynette joined Steve, Jim, and me at our table. Ante was laid, cards were dealt, and I tapped my foot against my chair leg as I struggled to focus on the game.

  By now, Matt was probably in his apartment. I imagined him pacing in his living room, watching the clock. Or maybe he was naked and hard in bed already. Or grabbing a cold shower to keep from burning the place down while he waited.

  I took a deep breath. It’s just one game. I can handle this.

  Lynette looked at her cards. She lifted two five-dollar chips. Then put one back. Then picked it up again. Civilizations rose and fell in the time it took her to decide on bets, but her hemming and hawing didn’t usually stand between me and some sweaty, desperate, sheet-tearing, neighbor-waking sex.

  My pussy tingled with anticipation, and if this went on much longer, I wasn’t going to make it to Matt’s apartment before I had to relieve some of this maddening tension. It wouldn’t have surprised me if he had to do the same. If, while I sat here waiting for Lynette to decide whether to wager five or ten dollars, Matt was slowly stroking his hard cock and—

  God, I need him. I need him right now. Fuck this game.

  I resisted the urge to sigh impatiently, and it was all I could do not to fidget. Or reach across the table and strangle the indecisive old bat. Just bet, woman. Now!

  “Five,” she said at last, throwing a chip into the pot.

  “Call,” I said quickly, adding my own bet.

  Steve thumbed his chin and eyed his cards. Don’t you dare. Don’t you dare be indecisive. Come on, Steve, don’t let me down. Eventually, he added five to the pot, as did Jim. We turned discards in to Jim and took our fresh cards. At least my distraction didn’t lead to screwing up my hand this time. In fact, I stood a pretty good chance of winning.