“Not really.” Twisting the cap off, he took a long swig of the highly caffeinated beverage. “Do you remember several weeks ago when Claire brought you back after a particularly nasty fight? You’d been hurt so bad that she had to carry you home.”
I shrugged nonchalantly. “Yeah.” That night had changed me. That’s when it first occurred to me that I had a thing for Jake.
“Something happened when I saw you like that. For the first time I realized just how fragile you were. I’d seen you that bad off before, but it never quite affected me like it did that night. That’s when I realized I wasn’t as objective where you’re concerned as I’d like, because the idea that something terrible could happen to you pretty much rips at my soul.”
His back was still to me, but the meaning of his words washed over me. He more than cared.
Thank you, Jesus.
“Jake, I had no idea.” I reached a hand toward him, but he was too far away. “I told you I’m tough to kill.”
Turning, he took my hand in his. “You always say that. I agree that you’re tougher than most, but you’re still human. You could have died that night. You have to understand that makes it difficult for someone who cares about you.”
“You care about me?”
“Too much.” He let go of my hand and sat back in the chair. “Honestly, I don’t want to. I like my job, and caring about you makes it tough to be objective. Wondering if you’re going to come back this time and whether or not you’ve been injured interferes with everything I need to do to protect what is most important to all of us. Intellectually I know you are only doing your job as a Guardian, but here”—he put my hand on his heart—“I find it difficult. Caring about you is definitely interfering with my ability to do my job.”
I blew out a breath. “So what are you saying?”
“There’s something between us. Something I want to explore, but we can’t.” He let go of my hand, and I suddenly felt adrift. “I can’t do my job and be with you at the same time. I can pretend for the time being so that Ginjin will stay off of your back, but we can’t—do you understand what I’m trying to say?”
“No.”
Confused, he started to explain again.
The hurt curled up inside me like a giant ball and made me feel sick. I held up a hand to stop him. “No, I get what you said. But it doesn’t make sense. We both want to explore whatever this is. That should be the beginning of a really great story, not the end. Are you saying that you can stop caring about me?” I pushed myself off of the counter. “Seriously, Jake? Because I want you more than anything, and I know there’s nothing that could stop that. Nothing. I ached for you last night, and I’m not just talking about an extreme need for sex. I wanted your arms around me. I wanted to feel my head on your chest. I wanted to feel safe for one more second.”
I don’t cry, but I wanted to in that moment. Suck it up, Al. I pointed an accusatory finger at him, but he stood there as if he were frozen. “What kind of person can turn off feelings like that?” I moved to the door. “You know, I think I have a solution. I’ll find someone else to continue the ruse if need be. You know us Caruthers girls. We go through men like crazy. So you don’t worry that pretty little head of yours, Jake. I’ll find some other boy to play with me. And maybe he won’t be such a coward and will actually want me back.” I stomped out of the kitchen.
Stupid men. I didn’t know why I even bothered. He was no different than any of the others I dated; he just was better at masking the fact he was a big, scared jerk.
I made it to my bedroom door, but Jake stopped me from getting inside. Grabbing me by my good shoulder, he shoved me back against the wall and planted his lips on mine.
My first instinct when someone grabbed me like that was to throw a punch, but he must have anticipated it. Both of my hands were trapped in his, and he shoved them behind me. Warmth spread from my lips down my spine as his tongue forced my mouth open. I gave in to the sensation and kissed him back.
His body pressed into mine, and I honestly forgot where we were. The heat of him warmed me from my fingers to my toes, and I struggled to free my hands so I could touch him.
When he finally lifted his lips, I almost groaned with disappointment.
“From here on out, I am the only boy you will play with,” he said softly. “And for the record, the answer is no.”
“What?” I was in a haze of need, and my brain did not compute.
“I can’t turn off my feelings for you. I can’t stop wanting you.” The kiss this time was so filled with passion I thought I might melt from the intensity of it all.
He finally let go of my hands, and my arms wrapped around him. “I’m really pissed at you,” I whispered against his mouth.
“I know. How about you be mad somewhere besides here?” He nodded toward the corridor, and I heard the footsteps. We couldn’t be alone here. Even in my room there was a chance someone would interrupt us. I took the comm from behind my ear and stuck it on the doorframe.
“Fine.” I tried to be mean, but I couldn’t help but smile. “Put your arms around my waist.”
Twenty seconds later we were in Jake’s bedroom at his ranch.
He was the tiniest bit green, but he’d live.
“I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to that.” He leaned his forehead against mine.
“But you’re doing so much better.” I reached up and put my hand to his cheek.
He lifted his head, and we stared at one another.
“We’re going to do this, aren’t we?” I put a hand on his chest. Embarrassed and enthralled all at once, I kissed him.
Taking my hand, he tugged me toward him and wrapped his arms around me. “Everything changes.”
“Maybe, but this is good, Jake.” I put my hand on his chest. “Can’t you feel it?”
He kissed me again. “There’s nothing right now in the world that I want more than you,” he whispered against my lips.
I grinned and looked up through my lashes at him. “You’re making me kinda hot.”
“Kinda?” He tugged my hand and pulled me toward the bed. I landed on top of him. Pushing myself up, I straddled him.
The length of him warmed and grew beneath me and gave me power. His fingers slid along my chin and lips. “You’re so beautiful. There were days when I had to sit on my hands to keep from touching you.”
His hand slid down my hip. I leaned over for another kiss, unbuttoning his shirt as I did. The muscles beneath the starched white button-down were hard, and I decided in that moment that by the time the night ended, I would know every inch of the man’s body.
But right now I had a need, and I felt I’d go mad if we didn’t hurry.
“You know how we’ve been taking it slow? Right now I need things to move really, really fast, or I’m gonna explode.” I pulled my T-shirt over my head and tried not to wince when it caught on my shoulder. I didn’t do such a great job, because he lifted me off of him and sat me on the side of the bed.
“We can’t do this. You’ll hurt yourself again.” He examined the stitches.
I twisted around so that the shoulder was away from him. “If we don’t do this”—I took his hand and put it on my heart—“I’m not going to make it through the night. I’ll die of sheer need.” I leaned back on his pillows. “Make me feel safe, Jake. Please.”
For a moment he just looked at me, and I thought he might reject me. But then his hands slipped to my waist. Unzipping my jeans, he slid them down my legs. Then the panties were gone and his hand was on me and I lost myself in pleasure. I rode the tide of it over and over again.
I could no longer think. My body was on fire, and I begged him to come inside.
I have no idea how he lost his clothing, but he lifted me off the bed so I straddled him. Even in my haze I knew he was trying to protect my shoulder, and it made me love him all the more.
“More, baby. Please.” I shoved myself down on his erection, screaming in pleasure as I did. I knew he would be hu
ge, and he didn’t disappoint. Leaning back, I grabbed his knees, pumping him with my hips. His hands were on my breasts, teasing my nipples, and my body was a giant mass of hot nerves waiting to explode.
“Alex,” he whispered as he watched me ride him. The pure passion in his voice drove me to go faster and faster, and he matched me move for move. I couldn’t breathe, and then everything hit in an explosion of light and sound. We both groaned, and my body shook from the passion. I fell over his chest, gasping for air.
Something inside me snapped. There aren’t words, but I’d never felt that way with any man. It went far beyond the passion we’d just shared. It was a connection. Something deep and meaningful and maybe just a little scary.
I propped my chin on my hands and stared at him for a minute, unable to read whatever was going on behind those gray eyes.
He lifted the hair off of my neck and kissed me there. It was intimate and sexy as hell.
I was at a loss for words, but they weren’t necessary. He lifted us both up and pushed the covers aside, and soon I was snuggled in his arms.
“Safe,” I said softly against his chest.
“Always,” he whispered back.
CHAPTER 24
The sound of a siren seared into my brain. My gut instantly tightened, and I sat straight up in bed.
Where the hell am I?
The room was pitch black. The siren went off again, and I realized it was a cell phone. A door opened to the left, and light blinded me. A figure stood in the door, steam billowing around it.
“Sorry.” Jake grabbed the phone from the bedside table. “I forgot to turn it off.” He apologized before picking it up. He was soaking wet, with a towel wrapped around his waist.
Just the way I liked him. My body was still sated from several rounds with the man, and I wasn’t sure I’d ever get enough of him. It was more than that feeling of being safe in his arms. I felt treasured, and that had never happened before.
“Yes,” he said into the phone as he looked at me. “I know where she is. I’ll let her know.”
“Hey.” He smiled and leaned over to kiss me.
“Hey,” I whispered back. My hand went to his wet chest, so hard beneath my hand. “You’re dripping on your eight-hundred-thread-count sheets.”
He sat down and gathered me into his arms. “So?”
I kissed him back. “I don’t care if you don’t.”
He pulled me tight and then sighed.
Pushing away, I stared at him. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m supposed to be finding you to let you know that you’re needed at a council meeting.”
I stiffened and then stood up. “Did they say why?” Didn’t matter; it was never good.
“No.”
“Could you call them back and tell them you couldn’t find me? That I’m off the grid?” I hated that there was a slight plea in my voice.
“I could, but lying to your mother isn’t one of my fortes.”
“Mom?” I looked around for my clothes. God, that was the last thing I needed. If she found out about Jake— “Does she know I’m here?”
“No. Why? Are you worried what she might think?” He sat back against the headboard and watched me dress.
I threw him my best are-you-kidding look. “I’m not so worried what she thinks about me, but do you want her to know where I am?”
“We are dating, right? I’d say officially now.” He winked at me. “I mean, I’m pretty sure there was nothing fake about last night.”
I couldn’t help but smile. “There is that.” I waved at him. “It’s just, I don’t know what she’s going to think about all of this. Not that I care. I mean—obviously I do or I wouldn’t have brought it up. She can be so—” I stopped myself and sat on the side of the bed and put my head in my hands. “That woman can just get over it if she has a problem with me dating you. I care about you, and I want to be with you, so damn her.”
When he didn’t say anything, I looked up to find him smiling at me. “What?”
“I was just waiting for you to finish the conversation with yourself.”
I slapped his arm. “You know she drives me crazy.”
“Only because you let her, Alex. You and your sisters assume she’s going to be a certain way about things, but I’ve honestly never met a more honest person than your mother. She’s also fair, and she carries the weight of the universe on her shoulders at all times.”
I had no intention of fighting about my mother with him. “When it comes to my mother, who doesn’t belong in this particular room with us”—I waved a hand around the bedroom—“can we just agree to disagree?”
He stood, then grabbed my hands and pulled me to him. “Absolutely.”
“Do we have time to . . .” I seriously doubted it, but being in close proximity to Jake already had my body screaming with need.
He lifted my chin in his hands. “I wish, love, but the meeting is in less than an hour.”
I sighed against his chest. “If you want me to take you back, you’d better get dressed.”
He frowned. “I’d rather drive.”
“Chicken. Isn’t your truck at work?”
He rolled his eyes, something I did all the time, but he looked hilarious. “I have other vehicles.”
I laughed. “Come on. You barely turned green the last time. You can do it.”
“Give me a minute,” he grumbled.
We landed back in my bedroom. Jake gave me one last kiss and then straightened his tie. “I’ll see you later.”
“You can bet on that, big guy.” I watched his gorgeous butt walk from the room.
“Hmmm. Now that is interesting,” Mira said from the bathroom door.
“Snoop,” I accused. “Did you enjoy the show?”
“Oh, yes. Lucky you waking up next to Mr. Jake, the stud in a suit.” She grinned. “And for the record, dear sister, I wasn’t snooping. Mom sent me to look for you.” Opening her palm, she handed me the comm I’d stuck to the door. “I knew when I found this that you were up to no good. Was it? Good?”
Pushing past her, I headed into the bathroom. “Sometimes a girl doesn’t want to be found. And I’m not going to talk about Jake.” I shed my clothes and stepped into the shower, needing a quick rinse.
“Oh, you don’t have to talk, Al. Everything you’re feeling right now is written all over your face. You’ve fallen for the guy in a big way. I thought you were just pretending.”
Pouring shampoo into my hand, I lathered my hair. “We are officially dating, and that’s it. That’s all you’re going to get from me.”
We were all very close and had always shared details of our love lives since we were young. But this thing with Jake was too special. I wanted to hold it close, private, at least for a little while longer.
“Go tell Mom I’ll be there in fifteen minutes. By the way, do you have any idea why I have to be there? I thought they had their own security team in place so that we didn’t have to guard them every time they met.”
“Mom didn’t say, but the situation involves Ginjin and some other dragons. We aren’t there so much to protect as to add to the festivities. She didn’t give many details, just said you had to be there, and that it was a full council meeting.”
I groaned for two reasons. One was that the dragons were involved; the other was because it was a full meeting, which meant it could honestly go on for days. I didn’t have time for that.
Mira left, and I rinsed under the hot spray of the spa shower, letting the water massage away the ache I still felt in my shoulder.
The last time we were at a full council meeting there had been an attack, and my mother had almost died. Almost, nothing. She had died. Gilly’s boyfriend, Arath, a powerful mage who also happens to be the king of demons, brought her back from the other side. I can’t say it changed her disposition much, but she hadn’t been as cranky as she had been before.
Ever since then, the council met in secret using a handful of guards they’d carefully
selected to protect them.
One thing I knew for certain: if Ginjin was involved, the whole thing was going to annoy the hell out of me. The dragon warrior always had a way of complicating proceedings and making my life a living hell.
CHAPTER 25
The meeting was held on Maunra, which happened to be where Arath, Gilly’s demon king, ruled. My guess was Arath had arranged it that way because he could control the portals where we traveled from world to world.
While it was populated by demons, Maunra was one of the few safe places left in the universe for these kinds of meetings. Gilly and Arath had put extra protection around the portals so no one could enter or leave Maunra while the proceedings took place.
The only problem with this particular world was that it sapped the energy right out of me. Mira had given me some herbs to help counteract the effects, but I could still feel it. The only one who wasn’t affected by the atmosphere was Gilly. A Guardian’s body was tailored to the world she protected against so that she could fight with full strength. Of course, that didn’t help the rest of us.
Everyone had gathered in the great hall of Arath’s castle, where the large, stone council table had been placed. The table was magically moved to each location of their meetings.
There were fourteen members in attendance, and the hall was populated with a variety of creatures. Unfortunately for me, there were also several dragons in attendance.
The sight of Ginjin and some of the others made me wish my mother had been a bit more forthcoming about this whole thing.
Mom sat next to Arath at the head of the table. It was the demon king who began the proceedings.
“The Kevan clan of Lincsire has made an official complaint against Alex Caruthers. She has been accused of murder.”
I heard a little gasp and turned to see Gilly, Mira, and Claire behind me. Mira’s arms were crossed against her chest. Gilly had her battle face on, and Claire’s bow mouth had made a surprised O.
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