‘The older a mother gets, the greater the risk of a Down’s syndrome baby. The test does carry a small risk of miscarriage with it. You’ll need to weigh up the pros and cons. You don’t have to have the test, but you should consider it.’
‘If you think I should then I will.’ Mrs Duncan replied cautiously. ‘I’m not sure I could cope with a disabled child, not when I have four of them and we’re all crammed into the tiny caravan up in the park.’
Annie could see how deflated she was. Mrs Duncan had come in full of hope and excitement and all Annie had done was burst her bubble. But, as Raphael had just pointed out, she wouldn’t be doing her job if she didn’t give her patients all the facts and let them make up their own minds.
‘I think you should have a word with the doctor before you go. If you can wait a few minutes, I’ll give him a shout.’
Mary nodded. Annie left the room and went in search of Raphael. Fortunately she caught him just as he was seeing a patient out.
‘I have someone in with me I’d like you to see,’ Annie said. ‘When I did her booking scan I could see a larger than normal nuchal fold. I’m not sure whether to arrange for her to come back for amniocentesis in three weeks or whether we should be doing a CVS today. I suspect that depends on what you think and whether you have time.’
Raphael took Mary’s notes and the picture of the scan Annie had taken. ‘You’re absolutely right about the nuchal fold,’ he agreed. ‘The hospital is lucky to have a midwife who can scan. It is much more efficient this way.’ He held his hands up and grinned as Annie started to speak. ‘I know you are highly trained. I recognise that. Shall we see Mrs Duncan?’
Mrs Duncan had finished dressing by the time Annie and Raphael returned. Although pale, she seemed composed.
‘I gather Annie here has explained things to you?’ Raphael said gently. ‘I realise it’s probably a bit of a shock, but we are going to do everything we can to help you make the right decision for you. Okay?’
Mary nodded.
‘There are three options here. One—we do nothing. Two—we bring you back for an amniocentesis. That’s where we take a sample of the fluid surrounding the baby in the womb. We can only do that when you are a little further on.’ He glanced at the notes. ‘In about three weeks’ time. The third option is that we can do a test today where we take a sample of the placenta. I have to warn you that both the tests carry a risk of miscarriage. So we have to weigh up whether the risks outweigh the benefits. Do you understand all this?’
‘I think so.’ Mary turned frightened eyes on Annie. ‘What do you think?’
‘I think you should go home and speak to your husband about it before you decide anything.’
‘But Bill’s away fishing. He won’t be back for another three days—at least.’
‘Another few days won’t make much difference either way, and it’s something you should speak to him about. We can, of course, do the CVS today, but I really feel you should take some time to think about it. I can also ask Kate to pop around and see you, if that helps. I know you saw her through your last pregnancies and sometimes it helps to talk things over with someone else before coming to a decision.’
‘Doctor?’ Mary turned to Raphael.
‘I think it’s good advice. Some women decide not to have the test at all, but I’m afraid it has to be your decision. Whatever you decide, whenever you decide, we will be here to help.’
‘I think I will wait, then. Can I let you know when I make up my mind?’
‘Of course, Mary. The important thing is not to leave it beyond sixteen weeks. Having a termination after that can be very hard, if that’s what you eventually decide to do.’
‘And I think it would be useful if I gave you some stuff explaining about Down’s syndrome to take away with you,’ Annie interrupted. ‘Many women find that these children can bring a lot of joy to the family. It may not be right for you, but think about it.’
As soon as Annie had seen Mary out, armed with all the literature she could find for her, as well as a few useful Internet sites that she might want to look at, Annie went in search of Raphael. She found him talking to one of the junior doctors at the reception desk. As soon as he noticed her he came towards her and, taking her by the arm, took her to one side out of the hearing of his colleague.
‘What is it?’ he said. ‘You are pale. There’s nothing wrong with the baby, is there?’
‘No, everything’s fine. It’s just…’ She tailed off, uncertain why she had sought Raphael out but knowing she needed to speak to him. Maybe it was the threatened miscarriage and the knowledge that she had an increased chance of going into early labour. She was so scared for her baby.
‘Seeing these patients makes you worry about your own pregnancy. Is that it?’ His warm brown eyes searched hers. He raised a hand to her face and brushed her cheek with a fingertip. ‘It must be hard for you.’
‘I’m just so frightened,’ she admitted. ‘I know the chances of me going into early labour are increased and, well, we both know what that could mean.’
Raphael put his hands on her shoulders, and ignoring the presence of his junior, pulled her close.
‘I know you are frightened. Try not to be. I am here with you.’
Annie let herself relax against his chest. He was here with her. For now. But would he stay?
CHAPTER NINE
THREE weeks later, Raphael tapped the front door of Annie’s house before walking in. They had slipped into a comfortable pattern and there had been no more scares with the pregnancy, much to Annie’s delight. As the door led straight into the small sitting room, Raphael found himself confronted with the sight of an inverted Annie. Dios. What was she doing?
Her upside-down face peered at him from the gap between her legs. She had tied her hair in a ponytail and it hung almost to the floor. She was wearing tight-fitting trousers that emphasised the shape of her bottom and her crop top revealed the taut mound of her belly and just the merest glimpse of the mound of her breasts. He felt something primeval stir in his belly.
‘Oh, hello,’ she said. ‘I’m just doing a few rounds of The Salute to the Sun. I’ll be finished in a few moments.’
In a fluid movement she changed position, curving her sweet body through a series of movements. One minute he’d be staring at her delicious rear, the next he’d be watching as her toned arms took the weight of her body and she moved into a series of lunges. Eventually she stood upright and brought her hands together as if she were praying. He took in the tiny droplets of moisture on her skin, her face glowing with her exertions, the gentle rise and fall of her breasts. The swell of her pregnancy was outlined by her Lycra trousers. She had never looked so beautiful or so womanly to him before, and it took every ounce of his willpower not to pull her into his arms and run his tongue over her skin.
‘Yoga,’ she said, a small smile tugging at her lips. ‘In case you are wondering. I’ve been doing it for years. And since it seems as if I am forbidden—’ she looked at him with mock anger ‘—to do anything more strenuous, I’ve been practising every day.’ She picked up a towel from her sofa and wiped the moisture from her skin. ‘I find it helps me stay calm,’ she added. ‘And I’m hoping it will help me stay focused in labour.’
Raphael tore his eyes away. He loved the way her eyes sparkled with amusement. He hadn’t seen Annie smile as often as he would have liked. More than anything, he wished he could be the one to bring the light to her face.
‘I have come to ask you if you would like to come for a picnic. Catalina and Maria arrived last night and as it’s a beautiful day, we thought Maria would like a trip to the beach. I know she would like it if you came too. Catalina also. She wants to meet the mother of her niece or nephew again.’
Dios, why had he said it in that way? Why couldn’t he admit that he wanted to spend time with her, too? Because he couldn’t, that was why. He had to remember that it didn’t matter how much he wanted this woman back in his arms, an affair was out of
the question. No woman was ever going to rip his heart out again. Not even this one. Especially not this one.
‘Maria? Catalina?’ She was frowning. A tiny pucker of her eyebrows. ‘They are here? In Penhally Bay? To see me?’ Annie wrapped the towel around her shoulders, hiding the exquisite swell of her breast from him.
‘To see you, yes, but also because my mother had to go to the north of Spain to see her sister and she didn’t want to take Maria with her. So she asked Catalina to take her for the weekend. My sister thought it was a chance to come here for a couple of days and get to know you a little. And Maria still talks about you. It would be a good chance to kill a bird with a stone, as you say in English.’
‘Kill two birds with one stone,’ Annie corrected him automatically. She wasn’t looking as pleased as he’d thought she’d be. ‘I don’t know, Raphael. I’d like to see them both again, especially little Maria, but…’ She tailed off.
Raphael could guess what she was thinking. He wondered if she had any idea how easily he was able to read her. She’d be worrying whether this was another attempt to persuade her to come and live in Spain.
‘Please,’ he said. ‘I know I have no right to ask you.Your time is your own, but Maria would be so happy to see you again.’
He knew it was unfair of him to play the Maria card. Annie might be able to resist a plea from him, but from the little girl? He doubted it. As soon as he saw the acceptance in her eyes he knew he had been right.
‘Where are they?’
‘I dropped them off at the beach. I told them I couldn’t promise that you would come.’
‘But you knew I would.’ Annie quirked an eyebrow in his direction. She was right. He had been certain that she wouldn’t be able to resist seeing Maria again.
‘I’ll just have a quick shower then change. You go on if you like. I’ll walk down when I’m ready. It won’t take long and I could do with the exercise.’
‘I’ll wait for you,’ Raphael said, picking up one of the magazines he had brought over a few weeks ago, noting that they hadn’t been read. What was wrong with Annie? Didn’t she like motorbikes?
By the time they arrived at the beach, the sun was beating down and the beach was busy with locals making the most of the first really hot summer’s day.
‘In a couple of weeks the beach will be crowded with tourists,’ Annie told Raphael. ‘We’ll feel the impact at the hospital, too.’
‘It is like Spain. In the winter everywhere is peaceful. Then the summer arrives and suddenly it doesn’t feel like home any more.’
‘I don’t mind, though,’ Annie protested. ‘We’re all tourists somewhere at some time. And I quite like the buzz when the visitors arrive.’
‘Buzz?’ Raphael repeated, looking perplexed.
Annie laughed. ‘It’s an expression. It means, an energy—an atmosphere.’
Raphael pointed to a couple of figures sitting on a blanket near the shelter of a wall.
‘There they are. You go on while I find somewhere to change.’
Annie tiptoed across the hot sand, her sandals in her hand. As soon as Catalina saw her she jumped to her feet and hugged Annie.
‘It is good to see you again.’ She smiled. ‘And looking so well. I
trust my brother has been looking after you? Is everything all right now? He told us…’ She tailed off.
‘Everything’s okay,’ Annie said softly. ‘I got a fright, but I’m okay now.’
Annie looked past Catalina’s shoulder. Maria, wearing her swimming costume, was standing watching Annie carefully, her thumb in her mouth.
‘Hello, little one,’ Annie said in Spanish. She had been swotting up some basic Spanish. As her child would almost certainly be bilingual, it seemed sensible.
The little girl broke into a shy smile and, stepping forward, wrapped her arms around Annie. Annie’s heart squeezed as she ruffled Maria’s thick dark curls.
‘Where is my brother?’ Catalina asked glancing over Annie’s shoulder. ‘Don’t tell me he decided that he was needed at the hospital?’
‘No. He’s just getting changed.’
Suddenly Catalina grinned. ‘Here he comes!’
Annie swung round. Raphael was striding towards them, wearing a wetsuit and carrying a surfboard. His bronzed chest was bare, the top half of his suit gathered around his lean hips. Annie could see the muscles in his upper arms bunch with the effort of carrying the board and she let her eyes slide down his body, taking in the toned six pack of his abdomen. The skin-tight fabric of his wetsuit clung to his thighs and across his hips. Annie’s skin tingled.
As Maria ran towards him, short legs sending puffs of sand in her wake, he dropped the board and opened his arms. Maria careered into him and he pretended to be knocked over.
Annie watched them, regret vying with the feeling of lust. She was glad about the baby—more than glad. Why, then, did she feel this aching sense of loss?
Annie paddled with Maria while Raphael took his board to an area a little further along, which was cordoned off from bathers. Out of the corner of her eye she watched him as he rode the waves, his body bending and curving as he balanced. Every so often she would catch her breath as he disappeared from view, but seconds later he would reappear from under the wave still upright. He had surfed before, that much was obvious.
‘I want to make a sandcastle,’ Maria said after she had finished splashing about, so they left Raphael to make most of the waves and returned to where Catalina was setting out the picnic. Keeping a watchful eye on Maria as she played, the two women stretched out on the blanket.
‘It is good to see my brother happy again,’ Catalina said softly. ‘It has been too long since I saw him laugh. I think being here, as well as you and the baby, has been good for him.’
‘He told me about Sebastian, and Ruth,’ Annie said softly. ‘It must have been hard on him.’
‘I have never seen him so…’ Catalina paused. ‘So distraught. He loved that little boy. You know, he left his room exactly how it was the day she took him. His toys on the bed, his football, everything, as if he expected him to come back. And he did expect him to come back, right up until the court case. When he knew he had lost Sebastian for ever, it was as though Raphael had lost part of himself.’
‘What kind of woman was she, his ex-wife? I can’t imagine anyone being so deceitful and then so cruel.’
‘Ruth? I never liked her.’ Catalina shrugged. ‘She always seemed to me as if she thought herself above everyone. You know, before Raphael became a doctor he was a very good football player. He could have played professionally, but he decided to study medicine instead. I think she would have stayed if he had chosen a different profession. She wanted more money, a better lifestyle than a doctor could offer her. Raphael told her that he would never go back to football, that, apart from everything else, he was too old, but she never stopped trying to change his mind. Then she met Sebastian’s father again. He is now a very important and rich man in Spain. She decided he could give her a better life. So she went, and took Sebastian with her.’
Maria had left her sandcastle and had come to sit next to Annie. She pressed her body into Annie’s and Annie put her arm around the child, drawing her closer.
‘He tried everything to get access, even just once a month, but he couldn’t. I think it broke his heart. When he met you, he had just been at the lawyer to try one more appeal, but that failed, too.’ Catalina looked at Annie thoughtfully. ‘He was a good father. He will be a good father to your child. If you will let him.’
‘I won’t stop him seeing our child, Catalina. I wouldn’t do that, not unless he gave me cause. But I worry sometimes that he will try and take our baby away from me. And I could never let that happen.’
Catalina looked Annie directly in the eyes. ‘You are wrong to think like that. He would never do to you what has been done to him. Never. He knows a child needs a mother and a father. You have to believe me. Just be patient with him.’
Annie did
believe her. She knew that she had been worried all along for nothing. Raphael wasn’t the kind of man to remove a child from its mother. And if she hadn’t been so scared she would have seen that before now.
Maria shifted in her arms and, putting a small hand up to Annie’s face, turned it towards her.
‘You are not sad any more?’ she said
‘No,’ Annie replied, and included Catalina in her smile. ‘I am not sad any more.’
The rest of the weekend sped past in a happy blur. Annie couldn’t resist the entreaty in Maria’s big brown eyes when Catalina suggested that Annie go with them to explore some of the hidden coves along the coast. As the four of them tramped along the beach, searching rock pools and underneath rocks for crabs, Annie let herself imagine what it would be like if this were her family. She saw the way Raphael was with Maria, the way he rolled up his jeans to paddle in the sea with her, the way he made the sad little girl giggle, and Annie’s heart ached. If only he felt about her the way she felt about him. If only they could be a family.
She could no longer pretend that the way her heart hammered every time she saw him was simple lust. She loved him. With all her heart and soul. She had loved him from the moment she had met him and she would love him to the day she died. But, she reminded herself, even though the realisation almost cracked her heart in two, friendship was all he had to offer, and for the sake of their child it would have to be enough.
The following Monday, Annie was down at the Penhally Bay Surgery for a check-up with Kate when Nick popped his head around the door.
‘Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realise Kate still had someone with her. I’ll come back in a few minutes.’
‘No, come in,’ Annie said. ‘We’re finished here. I was just chatting to Kate before getting back to St Piran’s for the clinic.’
‘Actually, it’s useful that you’re here, Annie. The patient I wanted to talk to Kate about involves you too.’
He sat down opposite Kate and stretched his legs out in front of him. Annie didn’t really know him that well. The older GP was always friendly and helpful, but there was a reticence about him that didn’t really invite confidences. All Annie knew about him was that he was a widower with grown-up children and that he and Kate had worked together for a long time.
Brides of Penhally Bay - Vol 4 Page 25