by Robyn Carr
She laughed at him. “Well, I guarantee you, I’m not!”
“Let’s do it, Ginger. Let’s check this out—us. I’ve been alone over a year and no one ever shook me up like you. I’m not walking away without a real good reason. But if you tell me to go...” He shrugged. “Just be honest with me, that’s all. I’m sure I’ll make mistakes but I’m not going to force myself on a woman.”
“And yet, you packed an overnight bag,” she pointed out.
“I am the eternal optimist.”
“I’m going to get in the shower. What will you do today while I work?”
“Well, with your permission, I’m going to go see Peyton, tell her we’re together and ask her to butt out.”
“Oh, Matt,” she said.
“Seriously, she’s been hell to bear ever since she first saw the way I looked at you. I love my sister but she’s a bossy pain in the ass. Sisters should always be younger. She’s not the boss of me.”
Ginger laughed. “You be nice to her or I’ll dump you.”
“Sure. Right. So then I might check and see if I can bring you lunch. I’ll walk around town a little, maybe head down the beach if the weather holds. And there are some organic farms east of here. I like looking at farms, talking to farmers.” He lay back on the bed, lacing his fingers together behind his head. He crossed one long, hairy leg over the other. “Right now I’m going to watch you do your morning things. And enjoy it.”
She took her coffee into the bathroom. “No,” she said. “You’re not.” And she slammed the door.
* * *
“Well, good morning,” Grace chirped when Ginger came in the back door of the shop. Grace was making a centerpiece, and Ginger marveled at how fast her hands moved, how perfectly symmetrically every stem and blossom fell into place. “How was dinner last night?”
“Hilarious—Ashley and Eve joined us. They tell these riotous stories of college life, the older women get the vapors and we all laugh until we have to stop and take a bathroom break. And the food was out of this world. Zorba’s. Have you been?”
“I don’t think so. I’ll have to talk Troy into that some night when we need a break from Winnie.”
“And how is dear Winnie?” Ginger asked.
“Dear Winnie is in fine form. You know, I brought her here because it was practical—that big old house in San Francisco wasn’t going to work for an invalid. And selfishly, I thought the only way I could spend time with her without killing myself flying back and forth to the Bay Area was if I could get her up here. But I didn’t realize how perfectly it would work out. First of all, Lin Su is a dream come true. She’s there almost every day in spite of the fact we hired her for a forty-hour week. As long as she can slip away to take care of her own personal business while Winnie rests or is tended by Mikhail, she’s happy to check on Winnie almost every day. And Winnie loves her. Whew, huh? And when Winnie is outside on the deck enjoying the activity on the beach and bay, people drop by to visit with her. I’ll go out on a limb and say she’s never had this in her life—she’s been too isolated by position. No one in Thunder Point knows or cares that Winnie is important.” She laughed almost gaily. “Mikhail is developing a routine and making friends—he’s off to the diner, the neighbors’, Cooper’s, he’s even driven up to the rink in North Bend to check out the skating and he let it slip the other night that he’s thinking of retirement. Now, I don’t know if that’s true but I bet it means he’s not leaving anytime soon.”
“He must like this little town,” Ginger said.
“Kind of sounds like it.” Grace stopped working and looked at Ginger. “I brewed coffee for you even though I am staying off caffeine.”
“Apparently you don’t need it,” Ginger said. “You’re pretty energetic.”
“And you look fantastic this morning. You must have slept better than usual or something.”
“I think so, yes,” she said, getting herself some coffee. While dressing her coffee, without looking at Grace, she said, “I had a surprise visitor last night.”
“Oh? And who might that be?”
“Matt,” she said quietly. “He came knocking...”
Grace gasped. “Oh! Did you talk?”
“Of course we talked,” she said with a laugh. “He freaked out that I was out of reach.”
“And drove all the way down here!” Grace said. “And back? That’s about eight hours round trip!”
“He didn’t go back,” Ginger said. “I think he’s showering right now.”
Grace gasped again. “Oh, my God, get out of here! Go back upstairs. I can handle this—there’s not much going on. You should have just called me! You could have had the day. After all you’ve done for me—”
“It’s okay, Grace,” Ginger said. “I’m not changing my schedule for Matt. And he has things to do today. I’ll see him later. In fact, I might suggest we go to Zorba’s for dinner. There are tons of things on the menu I want to try.”
“If you don’t mind me asking—what does he have to do today?”
“I think he’s starting with a visit to Peyton to tell her he’s here to see me. I hope that goes well—to hear Matt tell it, she’s been trying to spare me Matt’s pursuit.”
“I take it you’d rather not be spared?”
“He’s a wonderful man, Grace. He’s kind and generous and very strong in principle. I think I’m falling in love with him.”
“Think?”
“Okay, I’m sure, but don’t tell, okay? We’re both a little wounded—a couple of painful relationships, a hard time getting back on our feet, all that baggage. We’ll be okay, I think. But we shouldn’t have to deal with pressure from loving friends and family.”
Grace was grinning. “No pressure. Check. But if I were you, I’d go right back upstairs.”
“No,” Ginger said, laughing.
“I used to hate leaving Troy up there in my bed. He was so cute...”
Matt is beyond cute, Ginger thought, laughing. Still, it took great discipline to keep her work schedule knowing he was right up there. “I’m here to work,” she said.
“Okay then,” Grace said. “But I bet you’re not worth a damn with that love hangover glowing all over you.”
* * *
Matt decided to walk to Peyton’s house. When she opened the door, his sister was dressed for cleaning with a feather-duster thing in one hand. She had a babushka-type scarf covering her head, wore yoga pants with an oversize T-shirt and had bare feet.
“What are you doing here?” she asked.
“You and I have to get a few things straight,” he said. “Can you take a break from whatever you’re doing there?”
“I guess. Is this going to lead to a fight?” she asked.
“I hope so,” he said. “I’m pretty pissed off at you. Where are Scott and the kids?”
“He took them fishing for a while so I could clean house. Why are you pissed off at me?” she asked, holding the door open for him.
He entered. “Gimme a break, Peyton. You’ve been bossy and controlling, deciding things that are not for you to decide, and you know it. I mean, you could’ve offered to call Ginger and deliver a message for me.”
“Because I didn’t give out Ginger’s phone number? I didn’t feel it was my right to do that. She had a new phone number for a reason, after all.”
“Yeah, and it wasn’t me! You could have been helpful instead of mean. As it turns out, she wasn’t upset with me. And I had to go to some trouble to track her down.”
“I didn’t know,” she said stubbornly. “It’s not my business. And besides, I see you got down here bright and early to check it out.”
“I came last night,” he said, trying not to act smug about it.
She raised one dark brow and suddenly Matt saw his mother in her face. Oh, boy.
“Really?” she said.
“Now, I want you to listen,” he said. “We’re together. I love her. We’ve both been through some stuff and we’ve had a couple of rocky situat
ions, and we’ll probably have a couple more rocky moments while we try to get beyond our stuff, but we want to hammer it out because we both happen to think we’re good together. I don’t know if this is going the distance. I want it to, but it’s possible we’re not perfect together or it’s not the right time or one of us isn’t ready, but you gotta butt out. Really, you’d fuck up a wet dream.”
“Nice, Matt,” she said, curling her lip.
“I’m serious here, Peyton. I’d never hurt Ginger. I’m sorry I’m not coming to her all perfect, but I’m trying and I’d never hurt her. She’s a good person. She’s a beautiful person. Talking to her really helps me and if I can believe her, it helps her, too. We seem to really care about each other and we’re working the kinks out. You have to back away slowly, let us be. Or I swear...”
“Come in, Matt,” she said almost cheerfully. “Let’s have a cup of coffee.”
He hesitated. “Sounds like a trap,” he said.
“Don’t be ridiculous,” she said, walking to the kitchen and leaving him to follow. “I’d just like to sit down and hear what you have to say.”
A little reluctantly, he followed. She put a cup of coffee in front of him and sipped herbal tea from her mug. She made a face, which made him laugh. “You feeling all right, Peyton?” he asked.
“Well, I have moments,” she said. “I’m tired, get nauseous, can’t have anything good to drink. I think when the baby moves, I’ll feel lots better about giving up coffee and wine. Now, tell me about you and Ginger.”
“In your dreams, Peyton. I’m not here to discuss my personal life, just to get some boundaries in place.”
“Well, what kind of rocky stuff are you working through?” she asked.
“Like you don’t know? We’re just out of tough, unsuccessful relationships. She’s had losses and so have I. I know you didn’t like Natalie but that doesn’t make it easier to know I failed at marriage. You know how the men in our family feel about marriage.”
In a miraculous moment of compassion, she tilted her head and the look on her face was contrite. “I know, Matt. I’m sorry that didn’t work out.”
“But you’re not all that sorry,” he said.
“Sorry for you,” she insisted. “I’m sorry you were hurt. I knew you would be, but—”
“See, that knowing everything? That’s going to get between you and me. So you were right, good for you. But I did my best with Natalie and guess what? If you tell me right now that you don’t think I’m good enough for Ginger, that there’s no way it’s going to work, I’m not listening to that, either. See, I didn’t see it working out with that asshole Ted you were with for three years but it was what you wanted at the time and I kept my mouth shut. And when you settled in with Scott, I thought that was great, but I never said anything like, ‘Hey, great recovery, Peyton.’”
“Wow,” she said. “You didn’t like Ted?”
“Who did?” he asked. “I know you think Ginger is too good for me. You’re probably right. I know you think it would be great if I could somehow deserve her and make a decent life with a decent person—I get that. The bottom line is—we didn’t hire a matchmaker. That’s no good, Peyton. We have to find out if we work, not get together because someone as smart as you endorses it. You have to let it be up to us.”
“You love her?”
“I do. She’s amazing. I admire her so much.”
“What about all those other women?” she asked.
“I don’t know.” He shrugged. The question quieted him, made him think. “Spinning my wheels. Marking time. Looking and making mistakes and... Look, I’m not proud of that, all right? I didn’t break laws. I was careful with their feelings. It didn’t always work but I was. There hasn’t been anyone in a while now. And if it makes you feel better, it didn’t do anything to make me happy. In fact, it made me miserable.
“But I’m happy right now,” he went on. “That doesn’t mean I’m diving in too fast, but for God’s sake, let me try being happy. Will you?”
Peyton got tears in her eyes. “Aw, Matt...”
“Jesus, don’t cry! Don’t! I want to smack you so don’t cry!”
“I’m pregnant,” she said, and tears ran down her cheeks. “I hate that you ever thought I didn’t want you to be happy.”
“Awww...I’m not mad at you, Peyton. Well, a little bit because I thought you wanted to keep me away from Ginger. I just thought you wanted me to be happy your way,” he said. He got up from the kitchen table and found the box of tissues. He tossed it at her and it accidentally hit her in the head before she caught it. He winced.
“I did,” she said. “I wanted you to be happy my way. I have a little issue with that being-right thing. But I didn’t know you knew so much about yourself. About Ted. About rocky situations. About working through things with an amazing woman. About looking for love in all the wrong places. I just thought...”
“That I was a big dumb lummox.”
“Well...”
“Save it,” he said. And he waited while she mopped her eyes and blew her nose. He tried keeping a scowl on his face while she sniveled. He crossed his arms stubbornly over his chest. It was all an act. He wanted to hug her.
“Really,” she said with a sniff. “Nothing could make me happier than to think of you in a healthy relationship with a nice woman like Ginger.”
“All evidence to the contrary,” he said.
“If I say sorry can that be the end of it?”
“I don’t know, Peyton,” he said. “Can you mind your own business?”
She narrowed her eyes at him. “You might want to go a little easy on me.”
“That’s the price of forgiveness,” he said. “Your word. Then you stand by it and mind your own business.”
“All right,” she said irritably. “I can’t believe you made me cry.”
“Those were fetal tears and you know it. I can’t remember when you’ve ever cried over one of us boys.”
“I might cry a little easier these days,” she relented. “So. You’re going to be around awhile?”
“I’m going to leave for the farm Sunday night. We might bump into each other but let’s be clear, I’m here to be with Ginger. I need to spend time with her.”
“All right, jeez.”
He softened. He smiled warmly. “Maybe next week or the week after we can get together.”
“Well, don’t go to any trouble,” she shot back.
“So. We understand each other?” he asked.
“We understand each other, mutiko,” she said, meaning little boy.
That made him frown. “Don’t push it,” he warned. “I have things to do.” He stood to leave. After taking a couple of steps toward the door he turned back to her. He put a small kiss on her forehead. He hugged her gently. “Behave,” he warned.
Thirteen
Grace had never wished illness on her mother but it was true that the relationship she had with her now was better than ever. Their routine was calming. When Grace rose in the morning she would go upstairs to Winnie’s room. She would usually knock softly, not just to be sure Winnie was awake but also to be certain she wouldn’t wake or disturb Mikhail, who never admitted to spending nights in the chair beside Winnie’s bed. Grace would go into her mother’s room to find Winnie sitting up, wearing her favorite bed jacket. This particular morning she’d seen Mikhail out on the deck with coffee.
Winnie’s trembling had worsened and she could no longer fluff her hair or paint on her rose-colored lips—two things she hated to be seen without accomplishing. Grace actually enjoyed helping her mother with these small tasks. It made her feel useful, indispensable even.
“Time for that silly wench from the town to come out and give us a fix-up,” Winnie said of the local hairdresser who had obliged them by making regular house calls.
“As long as you promise not to call her that silly wench,” Grace said with a laugh.
“I know better than that, for God’s sake. It’s like insulting
the chef—he might spit in the soup.”
“You could end up with red hair. Or bald,” Grace pointed out. “Would you like to have your tea on the deck?”
“Only if I don’t look like the wrath of God,” Winnie said. “First the ladies’ room, please.”
“The fog hasn’t lifted, but the sun is over the mountains already. You can watch it rise and chase the fog out to sea,” Grace told her. “You’ll need your shawl. Troy and Mikhail are already out there with their coffee. It’s a lovely, dewy morning.”
Winnie didn’t say so often but she liked this place. It was like a vacation, like a chilly and wintry Cabo San Lucas. When she was on the deck, which was a couple of times a day in good weather, there were regular visitors. Sarah Cooper liked to have a morning run with her Great Dane, Ham, and she would stop by some mornings to say hello to Winnie, leaving the dog at the foot of the stairs. Seth Sileski, on the other hand, enjoyed an early-evening jog and would then meet friends at Cooper’s, but he’d frequently stop by for a little report on the town first. Winnie really enjoyed the local news from Seth even if she didn’t know half the people. Grace liked a walk on the beach now and then and she always walked to and from the flower shop if it wasn’t raining. Dr. Grant took his little ones fishing off the dock sometimes and he used that opportunity to ask after Winnie’s health, and their next-door neighbors—the Lawsons—checked in frequently if they saw Winnie enjoying the sunshine.
This was actually new for Winnie—friends and neighbors who weren’t intimidated by her, who cared if she was well or ill.
Mikhail was often about, but he had his own routines. He now donned board shorts that were extralong on his short body, a hat, white socks in his brown German walking shoes. He walked on and off all day long. He went into town, had a meal at the diner almost every day, visited with Waylan at his bar, sometimes helped Grace and Ginger pull in their sidewalk displays at closing time. Even though he didn’t drive he made regular visits to the service station having struck up friendships with the owner, Eric, and his right-hand man, Al. These days he talked a lot about buying a car. And weirdly unsurprisingly, he had many female fans who honked their horns and waved as they drove by. He frequently walked out of town to the nearest farm stand and brought home fresh vegetables. Grace said he must log twenty miles some days.