by Kim Boykin
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Praise for Zen for Christians
"Kim Boykin writes in the skilled language of simplicity. While addressing those new to Zen, she offers practical wisdom, challenge, and encouragement to all practitioners."
-Rose Mary Dougherty, Shalem Institute for Spiritual Formation, Bethesda, Maryland
"The great religions of the world have much to learn from each other. Kim Boykin's book is a skillful step in that direction. The heart of the matter of Zen is presented in a direct and informative way that is based on her firsthand experience of Zen training. This should prove to be a helpful guidebook for any Christian who wishes to explore Zen practice."
-John Daido Loori, Roshi, Abbot, Zen Mountain Monastery
"This lovely, wise, and practical introduction to Zen keeps its promise of companionship as the kind of spiritual cookbook you can bring right into the kitchen. Recipe-reading like this, in fact, inspires you to get into the kitchen, encourages you to keep at it, and invites you to share your efforts in communion with others."
-Steven Tipton, coauthor, Habits of the Heart
"An excellent resource on Zen practice, written from a pragmatic, personal, and yet sophisticated point of view. What a fine contribution to Buddhist-Christian understanding!"
-Judith Simmer-Brown, coauthor, Benedicts Dharma: Buddhists Reflect on the Rule of Saint Benedict
"Kim Boykin braids together strands, first, of her experience of Zen, as she came to it from a fairly nonreligious background but with a profound sense of anguish over the suffering of the world; second, of her very helpful reflections on what she sees as the essential lack of tension between Christianity and Zen; and finally, of her clear instructions and important information for beginners in the practices of Zen. This is a good-humored, intelligent, non-guilt-inducing book written by a person who shows us clearly what it would be like to reap the benefits of what she preaches."
-Roberta Bondi, author, Memories of God and Houses: A Family Memoir of Grace
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Zen for Christians
a
beginner's
guide
Kim Boykin
Foreword by Gerald G. May
JOSSEY-BASS
A Wiley Imprint
www.josseybass.com
* * *
Copyright © 2003 by Kim Boykin. All rights reserved. Published by Jossey-Bass A Wiley Imprint 989 Market Street, San Francisco, CA 94103 www.josseybass.com No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, scanning, or otherwise, except as permitted under Section 107 or 108 of the 1976 United States Copyright Act, without either the prior written permission of the Publisher or authorization through payment of the appropriate per-copy fee to the Copyright Clearance Center, Inc., 222 Rosewood Drive, Danvers, MA 01923, (978) 750-8400, fax (978) 646-8700, or on the Web at www.copyright.com. Requests to the Publisher for permission should be addressed to the Permissions Department, John Wiley & Sons, Inc., Ill River Street, Hoboken, NJ 07030, (201) 748-6011, fax (201) 748-6008, e-mail: [email protected]. Jossey-Bass books and products are available through most bookstores. To contact Jossey-Bass directly, call our Customer Care Department within the United States at (800) 956-7739, outside the United States at (317) 572-3986, or fax (317) 572-4002.
Jossey-Bass also publishes its books in a variety of electronic formats. Some content that appears in print may not be available in electronic books. Meditation postures photos: Copyright 1998 Skip Nall; courtesy of MKZC Publications, Beginning Zen (A Sourcebook for the Spiritual Path) Buddha photo courtesy www.siamese-dream.com Hotei photo courtesy Joanne Clapp Fullagar
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Boykin, Kim Zen for Christians : a beginner's guide / Kim Boykin ; foreword by Gerald G. May. p. cm. Includes bibliographical references and index. ISBN 0-7879-6376-3 (alk. paper) 1. Spiritual life-Zen Buddhism. 2. Christianity and other religions-Relations-Zen Buddhism. 3. Zen Buddhism-Relations--Christianity. 4. Boykin, Kim 5. Spiritual biography. I. Title. BQ9288.B69 2003 261.2'43927-dc2l 2002154862 Printed in the United States of America FIRST EDITION HB Printing 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
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Contents
FOREWORD BY GERALD G. MAY
An Invitation to Zen Practice
Practice: Zazen: Counting the Breath
1 How I Became a Christian Zen Practitioner
Practice: Walking Meditation
2 The Buddhist Way of Liberation from Suffering
Practice: Noticing Thoughts
3 Zen Teachings and Christian Teachings
Practice: Zazen: Following the Breath
4 Enlightenment: Already and Not Yet
Practice: Practicing with Everything
5 Making Zen Practice Part of Your Life
Practice: Zazen: Shikantaza, or "Just Sitting"
One More Thought: If It's Worth Doing, It's Worth Doing Badly
RECOMMENDED RESOURCES
NOTES
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
THE AUTHOR
* * *
To Brian
* * *
Foreword
I wish I'd had this book when I began to explore Buddhism. It would have made things much easier. My first experience with Zen was like a spiritual boot camp-entirely unpleasant. The teacher barked orders, and his students tried desperately to get everything exactly right. There was never any relief from the intensity, no breath of humor. It's true that sitting Zen can have its unpleasant times no matter how it's presented. As a popular American Buddhist saying goes, "A mind is a terrible thing to watch." But the mind can also be hilarious, and Zen should have its lighter side as well. Nowadays I am suspicious of any spiritual teaching that lacks humor, but then I was just beginning. Like the other students in that first class, I believed that something good would happen only if I could get everything perfectly right. But all I felt was pain and frustration, so I assumed I was doing something wrong. I was a failure.
It would have been so nice to have this book then, to touch into Kim Boykin's gentle encouragement and good humor and to hear her assurance that getting things right is not the point at all. But I would have to wait; it was 1972, and Kim Boykin was far from her own first Zen sitting.
Like many Americans who explore Buddhism, I had a fairly solid background in traditional Western religion. My Methodist parents made sure I said my prayers and went to Sunday school. I knew the stories of Jesus and even felt I had a close personal relationship with him. As I got older though, I grew first frustrated and then angry about what I saw as hypocrisy in the people of my church. Not only did they often use their religion as an excuse for moral arrogance, but they also resisted any questioning of beliefs. They didn't seem to want any part of going deeper in the spiritual life.
I did not understand why, but I definitely wanted to go deeper. As an adult, I searched for a local church that would welcome my wonderings, and found none. I looked for a religious community that would teach me about the inner spiritual life, about prayer and meditation, and found none. So when I began to explore Eastern religions, I carried some baggage with me. Church, as I knew it, had failed to meet my needs, and I was taking my spiritual business elsewhere. Or so I thought.
What surprised me, eventually, was that my foray into Buddhism led me in a kind of circle, back to my Christian roots. Over time, Buddhist practices somehow revealed to me the rich resources of Christian contemplative tradition that had been there all along, hidden beneath the busyness of popular religion.
I was not alone in that experience. Over my thirty years of working with the Shale
m Institute, I met many people who felt that their churches and synagogues were lacking in spirituality. Most nurtured a simple, wistful longing for "something else." They were not clear about exactly what they wanted, but they knew they were hungry. In their searching, many turned toward the East and experienced exactly what I had-an eventual discovery of deep nourishment within their own original tradition. The phenomenon happened so frequently that we gave it a name: "pilgrimage home."
It is here in this pilgrimage home that resources such as this book become crucially important; they provide guidance and nourishment that are not easily found elsewhere. For a person beginning a conscious interior spiritual journey, it may not be easy to tell where the true nourishment can be found. As a society, we have been inundated with quick-and-easy recipes for spiritual and psychological self-help. Although many of these are well intentioned, they often fail to provide the real satisfaction people are seeking. A quick drive-through at a fastfood restaurant may ease one's hunger for a while, but it takes a carefully, lovingly cooked meal to nourish the deeper places in a lasting way.
In this regard, Kim Boykin is a good cook. In this book (which she herself likens to a cookbook), she serves up nutritious recipes that will stick to your ribs. In the text of the book, Kim shares the story of her own pilgrimage. It is perhaps because of her unusual religious background that she is able to remain free of the negative "baggage" that so often creeps into religious discussions. She has no particular ax to grind with any religion, no psychological agenda to impose on the reader. She is able to present her material simply, clearly, and directly, with a lightness and humor that immediately put one at ease.
At the same time, she is not afraid to tackle the thorny questions that inevitably arise when Christians look at Zen. What are the similarities between Zen and Christianity, and what are the differences? What does it really mean for a Christian to practice Zen Buddhism? Does it amount to a denial of one's Christian faith, or can it lead to a deepening of it?
Kim addresses such questions more coherently and revealingly than any other writer I know, and she teaches Zen practice with the greatest clarity and lightness I have seen anywhere. This is truly good nourishment. I only wish I'd had it when I began.
Bethesda, Maryland
February 2003
Gerald G. May
Senior Fellow, Shalem Institute
www.shalem.org
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Zen for Christians
* * *
An Invitation to Zen Practice
Zen for Christians is a beginner's guide to Zen, written especially for Christians. It weaves together detailed instructions in Zen meditation, an introduction to the teachings of Zen, and reflections on Zen in relation to Christianity. It is based on the introductory classes on Zen that I've been teaching for the past five years at churches and in evening adult education programs.
"Zen for Christians" does not mean Zen adapted for Christians in the way that "yoga for pregnancy" means yoga adapted for pregnant women. The Zen in this book is just plain Zen, but the presentation of Zen in this book is especially for Christians. I tell the story of my own experience with Zen and Christianity. I address issues of particular interest and concern to Christians. And I explore some of the similar observations that Zen and Christianity make about the experience of being human.
Zen is a way of liberation from suffering-both the suffering we experience ourselves and the suffering we cause others. It is a practical and experiential tradition, centered in a form of meditation that can be practiced by people of any or no religion. Zen practice is about opening compassionate awareness to all of reality and realizing that the joy and freedom we long for are available right here and now, in the midst of the messiness and pain and confusion of our lives.
Zen is a way of selflessness, in two senses of the word. First, Zen is a way of directly experiencing what Buddhism calls "no-self"-realizing that the distinction between "me" and "not me" isn't so clear and definite as we usually assume it is and experiencing the interconnection and interdependence of all things. Second, Zen is a way of selflessness as opposed to selfishness-a way of being helpful instead of harmful, a way of compassion for everything and everyone, including ourselves. These two forms of selflessness are connected. As we more fully experience reality from the perspective of no-self, we are freed from the tyranny of an illusory "self" and freed for a life of selfless joy and compassion.
Zen is a peculiar religious tradition. Many people wouldn't call it "religious" at all. Zen is not about doctrines or beliefs. It's not about worship or devotion. Zen is not theistic, but it isn't atheistic either, or even agnostic. Zen simply doesn't address the subject of God. In Zen, the Buddha is not understood to be a god or messiah or superhuman but an ordinary human being who discovered a way of liberation from suffering and taught this way to others.
Trappist monk Thomas Merton says that comparing Zen and Christianity is like comparing tennis and mathematics. I think Zen and Christianity are more comparable than that (and Merton probably does too, since he says this in Zen and the Birds of Appetite, which is full of comparisons of the two traditions), but I would say that practicing Zen as a Christian is like playing tennis as a mathematician. If you're a mathematician and you want to play tennis, you just keep on being a mathematician and you also play tennis. There's no special trick to it. You don't need to wear shorts and tennis shoes to do your mathematics, and you don't need to ponder differential equations while playing tennis. If you're a Christian and you want to practice Zen, you just keep on being a Christian and you also practice Zen.
Christians have found that Zen practice can be a powerful way to nurture our capacity to love God, our neighbors, and ourselves, and our capacity to say to God from the heart and in all circumstances, "Thy will be done"-not my will, but thine. In particular, Zen practice can be a powerful way to help us see and let go of what gets in the way of loving God and all of God's creation and what gets in the way of opening to God's will.
Of course, the Christian tradition offers us its own spiritual practices to nurture our capacity to love God and creation and to open to God's will. In this book, I simply offer Zen as another spiritual practice that you might wish to try. I invite you to incorporate Zen practice into your life as a Christian, as many Christians, both lay and ordained, Protestant and Catholic, have already done.
Since Zen is fundamentally a practice-something you do, something you experience-the essentials of Zen cannot be grasped by reading about it. In this way, Zen is like any activity that you learn through practice and experience, like playing tennis or driving a car or baking bread. You can get some useful and interesting information by reading about it, but it is by getting out on the court and hitting some tennis balls, by getting in the car and driving, by kneading the dough and letting it rise, that you learn how to do it and what it's really all about.
Reading this book, then, is like reading a cookbook. The recipes in a cookbook are there not just to read but to guide you in preparing something to eat. In this book, the practice sections are the recipes, and the chapters help you better understand the recipes and more fully appreciate the cuisine. The list of recommended resources at the end of the book tells you where to learn more about this cuisine and where to get ingredients that you won't find at your local supermarket. I invite you to try some of the recipes-not just to read about the tastes and textures and aromas of Zen but to experience them for yourself.
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Practice
Zazen: Counting the Breath
The Japanese word zen means meditation, and the central practice of Zen is zazen, or sitting meditation, also simply called "sitting." This book includes instructions in three slightly different forms of zazen, as well as several other forms of meditation. We will begin with a basic Zen meditation practice called counting the breath.
Getting Ready
Find a relatively quiet place, where you can sit undisturbed. Eventually, you will be able to do zazen
in almost any environment, but especially in the beginning, a quiet space is helpful. If possible, the lighting should be dim, like twilight.
Wear comfortable, loose-fitting clothes. You don't want to be wearing anything that constricts your breathing, so if you are wearing pants that are snug at the waist, you might want to undo the top button and loosen your belt. Remove your shoes. Either socks or bare feet are fine.
You will need a cushion that is several inches thick when compressed. Try a bed pillow folded in half or a rolled-up blanket, or try putting a sofa cushion on the floor and sitting on the edge of it.
If you want to make zazen a regular practice, I would recommend getting a zafu or a seiza bench to sit on. A zafu is a round meditation cushion, about a foot in diameter and about six inches thick, traditionally black or brown, stuffed with a plant fiber called kapok. A recent variation is a zafu stuffed with buckwheat hulls. A seiza bench is a small wooden bench, about six to eight inches high, used to support a kneeling position. (Benches of the same sort can be found at Christian retreat centers, where they're called prayer benches or kneeling benches.)
The zafu or seiza bench is traditionally placed on top of a zabuton, a thick, squarish mat that cushions the knees and legs. For cross-legged positions a carpeted floor is usually sufficient cushioning, but for kneeling positions it's helpful to have extra cushioning. A blanket or two folded in half several times can function as a zabuton.
The only equipment you need for Zen practice is something good to sit on, though catalogues of Buddhist supplies and ads in Buddhist magazines will try to sell you all sorts of other stuff. The list of recommended resources at the back of the book includes sources of zafus, zabutons, seiza benches, and other supplies.