"No, it's okay," I said. "I don't want him to come out here in the cold. Just tell him 'hi' for me and Merry Christmas."
"Are you sure?" Liam asked.
I nodded. "Yeah, there's no reason to interrupt his game. We have to get back to the caroling, anyway."
"All right," Liam said, shaking his head like it was a shame as he reached out to hug me. "He's gonna be sad he missed you."
Those words caused hot blood to rush all through my body. My nerve endings felt tingly and alive.
Liam reached out to give Kacie a hug as well. "It was good seeing y'all," he said. "Merry Christmas."
"You are such a spaz!" Kacie whispered as soon as we turned to walk away.
"Thanks," I said sarcastically.
"Seriously, he basically flat-out told you Owen wants to see you, and you just straight-up denied him."
"He doesn't know if Owen wants to see me or not. He's just guessing."
"Darcy!"
It was another male voice, and this time I knew who it belonged to. I felt weak in the knees and short of breath before I even turned around.
"I tried to talk her into staying, but she ran off." Liam was intentionally speaking loudly enough for me to hear. I knew he was tattling on me, and I knew he was talking to Owen. I turned slowly to find both of them standing on the edge of the lawn. It was dark out, but there was enough light from the street lights for me to clearly see Owen's face. He had on a long sleeve shirt but no coat, and he crossed his arms in front of his chest.
My body experienced every possible sensation.
I was hot and cold at the same time.
I was shaking and my knees were weak.
I was nauseated, short of breath, and everything else you can think of.
My body was going completely haywire.
"Hey," Kacie said. She started to walk toward the guys, but stopped as soon as she realized I wouldn't budge. She tugged at my arm, but I was completely paralyzed in my tracks—like my feet were one with the concrete sidewalk. Owen continued to walk toward us, and Liam gestured at him and waved at us before taking off toward the house.
"What's up," Owen said. He smiled casually as he walked toward us rubbing his hands together to fend off the cold. "It's been a while."
He reached out to hug me, and I leaned into him casually, trying not to completely collapse into him and began crying with relief like I wanted to do. I let go of him, taking a step back and trying to regain my composure. The warmth, feel, and smell of him was just too much. I was overwhelmed.
Owen leaned in and gave Kacie a casual hug to match the one he gave me. "This one I see from time to time on campus," he said. He looked at me. "But you… it's been a long time."
Three years and four months, I thought but didn't say—at least I don't think I said it.
"Did I say that?" I asked.
"Say what?" he asked.
"Nothing."
"Yeah," he said. "You've said nothing since I've been standing here. I thought the cat got your tongue." He grinned at me a little as if expecting me to respond, but I could do or say nothing. I had been so in love with him for so long that I was completely petrified.
"Abby said you were with the carolers who came by earlier," he said gesturing down the street at the group of singers. "I didn't see you."
I glanced over my shoulder, feeling thankful for the distraction. I could hear them singing.
"We were," Kacie said, since I was obviously useless. "Mr. Sanders goes to my church. We go caroling in this neighborhood every year."
Owen smiled at her before focusing on me. He looked right at me with an unreadable expression. "It's been so long," he said. "How's school going?"
"Good," I said, managing a little smile. I was so relieved to see him and be standing right next to him that I wanted to burst into tears. I held my hands in front of my face, pretending once again to warm them even though I wasn't even aware of the cold.
"She's a cheerleader," Kacie said. "And she makes straight-A's."
"A straight-A makin' cheerleader," Owen said, sounding impressed as he smirked at me.
I smiled and rolled my eyes at Kacie for blatantly bragging. "I'm sure you're cold without a jacket," I said. "You should get back inside."
Owen looked down at his own shirt as if he hadn't even bothered to worry about the temperature. "Why don't you come inside?" he asked. "Abby said she already invited you. We're all just hanging out in there. The girls are working on a gingerbread house. It's huge. You should come see it." Owen gestured in front of him making a box that was roughly two feet in every direction.
"That big?" Kacie asked. "I thought they were just decorating one of those little kits from the craft store."
Owen laughed. "No, it's the real deal. Abby's mom bakes these huge sheets of gingerbread, and they make a house out of it. They already had the house done when we got here. They're just decorating it. You should really come in and see it. It looks like a candy store in there."
"I want to go see it," Kacie said, tugging at my arm.
"No," I said, standing stubbornly in place. "We're not gonna go crash his girlfriend's party. We barely even know her."
"Come on," he said. "You know Shelby and Liam, don't you? They're both in there. It's really laid back, I promise."
Sure, he was trying to get us to come in, but he hadn't denied the part about Abby being his girlfriend, and that made me literally feel like I was going to throw up. Seriously, saliva accumulated in my mouth like I was actually about to do it. I turned and paced a few steps, walking in a tiny circle.
"It was great seeing you," I said, smiling but feeling like I needed to run for the hills. "Merry Christmas!"
Owen gave me a half smile that was way too composed. His dark eyes glimmered, reflecting the light from the nearby streetlamp. How in the world could he be so gorgeous and so completely calm?
"She's not my girlfriend, Darcy."
It was a casual enough statement, but the words implied some kind of deeper assurance—or maybe I was just hoping they did. He extended his hand and left it hovering there in mid air. There was nothing I could do to stop myself from reaching out to take it. Bam, bam, bam, bam, went my heart. I was shaking like a leaf, but I took his hand, anyway. I had never in my life been so thankful that I had on gloves because touching Owen barehanded would have given me a heart attack.
I glanced at Kacie who smiled at me like she was satisfied with herself.
"Do we need to tell them we're not caroling anymore?" I asked.
She shook her head. "They won't even notice we're gone."
Chapter 6
Kacie and I followed Owen into the Carter's house. He had pulled me along for a few steps on the sidewalk, but we were no longer hand-in-hand by the time we made our way inside.
The gingerbread house was at least as impressive as he promised. It was set up on the kitchen island with several people sitting around it, placing candies here and there. Abby and Andy were both working on it along with Andy's wife, Layla. Shelby, Liam, and Mrs. Carter were standing on the other side so that they could work on the back of the house. Shelby was the first to say something when she saw us come in.
"Hey!" she said. She was several years older than us, and I sort of assumed most of the Bishops had a distaste for me, so it surprised me that she was the first to speak up.
"Y'all got smart and came in out of the cold," Mrs. Carter said.
In spite of there being so many people standing around, there was still plenty of room around the grand kitchen island, so the three of us easily found a front row spot. I leaned against the marble countertop, taking in the gingerbread house, which was even larger than Owen built it up to be.
"Is this seriously made out of cookie?" Kacie asked in awe. She reached out and carefully touched a brown spot on the wall of the house with her fingertips.
"Everything's edible," Mrs. Carter said proudly. She picked up one of the small gingerbread men that were stacked over to one side. "You're
welcome to start with one of these, if you like. Or you can just go straight to work on the house. These bags are full of royal icing."
She leaned over and pointed to several of the plastic bags that were filled with white icing. All of them had metal tips where the icing was dispensed. I had used one of them before so I was fairly confident that I could operate one without making a total fool of myself. I was listening to her give a speech about how each of the attachments we're shaped differently and thus made the icing come out in different shapes and amounts—some would leave a skinny, smooth trail and others a thick, star-shaped trail. I knew a bit about what she was talking about, which was a relief because I was completely distracted by something else.
No, it wasn't Owen.
I wish I could say it was, but it wasn't.
This was one of those moments where a bodily function took over and suddenly outweighed everything.
My guts cramped as I stood there, trying to listen to Mrs. Carter's speech about icing and candy and how to apply them to the house.
I began to sweat.
I had already taken off my hat, scarf, gloves, and jacket when I came inside, but it wasn't enough. I pulled on the collar of my sweater, trying to get more air, and begging myself to just wait until I made it home so I could use my own restroom. I had been in a situation like this before—one where my stomach just wouldn't wait. But never, ever had it happened so quickly and at such an inappropriate time.
More cramps.
More sweating.
I smiled and pretended to listen to Mrs. Carter.
Owen looked at me. "I'll be right back," he said. He took off toward what I assumed was the basement. I could tell by the way he conducted himself that he was going to wrap up his game of pool or tell them he was no longer playing.
"I'll be right back, too," I said in a far more tentative voice than Owen—almost like it was a question.
I glanced at Abby and then Mrs. Carter. "Do you mind if I use your restroom real quick?"
Why did I have to add the words real quick? Judging from the gurgling sensations going on in my abdomen, I had no idea how long I would be in there.
I was completely mortified and begged God to take these feelings from me, but there was nothing I could do. I had to find a restroom.
Abby agreed to show me to the restroom, and she stood up from her stool with a smile and proceeded to lead me casually through the kitchen and living room like we had all the time in the world. I did my best to smile and talk to her and act normal, but I had never been so embarrassed in my life. My body was betraying me at the worst possible moment. She opened the restroom door and turned on the light for me, and I went inside, thanking her and mumbling something about how I would join them in the kitchen in just a second.
The two or three minutes that followed were perhaps the longest of my life.
In an ideal fairytale world, reuniting with Owen Bishop after almost four years would've been full of glamorous stolen glances, but instead, there I was, sitting on a toilet, sweating and feeling more mortified with every passing second.
I had been on a road trip one time with some friends and the same thing happened to me, causing me to make an emergency stop at a gas station. I thought that experience was the end-all-be-all of embarrassment, but this one took the cake. I reminded myself several times during the process to stay calm and overcome.
I had no idea how much time had passed. I moved quickly and efficiently, finishing up, washing my hands, and making myself as presentable as possible, but I knew I had been gone entirely too long considering the fact that I promised I'd be back in a second.
There could not have been a worse moment for my humanness to rear its ugly head, and I had to smile at myself on the way out of the restroom… because what else was I supposed to do, cry?
Owen was in the kitchen with the others when I made my way back out there. They were all laughing and joking around, which made me feel better. I started to say something about being sorry that I took so long, but I decided to keep quiet and just pretend like I didn't even notice how long I had been gone.
I came to stand next to them, leaning against the counter, and feeling grateful for the physical relief. Owen smiled at me and handed me a plastic bag full of icing. I took it from him, staring at the house for a second before changing my mind and going for one of the little gingerbread men.
"I think I'll start with one of these," I said, taking a seat on a stool. I quietly went to work on it, beginning by outlining his whole body. My hands were shaking, but I leaned onto the bar just the right way to steady myself as much as possible.
Everyone else had been talking about Christmas shopping, and I felt content to listen to their conversation. Owen was next to me, but he and Liam were busy sticking rows of cinnamon candies onto the roof as Abby strategically piped icing.
"I saw that new shopping center going up in Midtown," Andy said.
I knew before I even looked up that he was talking to me. My father owned a lot of commercial and residential property in Memphis (including the land and shopping center Andy was referring to).
I smiled as I glanced at him. "I think it's gonna have a Whole Foods," I said.
I knew it was true.
That was common knowledge.
I had heard at least half-a-dozen people say that since I had been home for Christmas. I just always got uncomfortable when people started to talk about my father's money, so I usually stated some random, vague fact to distract them.
Everyone in Memphis knew my father, and most of them were somewhat intimidated by him. He was a businessman who was known for his take-no-prisoners attitude. His age only added to his somewhat unapproachable reputation. He was a good deal older than all of my friends' dads because he was actually my grandfather. My parents both passed away when I was an infant, and my grandparents took me in and raised me as their own. Most people regarded my father with some measure of curiosity and fear, and honestly, I was okay with that because that's just how it had been all my life. To me, he was a caring father who provided for all of my needs. To me, he was Dad.
"I love Whole Foods," Shelby said. "I went to one that had the best sushi I've ever eaten."
"I like their juice bar," Abby said.
"Yeah, she gets that nasty green stuff with spinach and celery in it," Andy teased.
We talked about Whole Foods, which led us into a conversation about our Christmas menus and Christmas traditions. There were a few different families represented, and we all shared things we did.
My family wasn't like any of theirs. My real dad had been an only child, so I didn't have any aunts, uncles, or cousins. Because of this, we traveled every year.
"We do something different every year, but this year, we're going to New York," I said. "We're leaving tomorrow."
"Are you meeting up with some of your friends from college?" Mrs. Carter asked.
"Yes ma'am. We're not going to Ithaca, but I have a few friends who grew up in the city, and we'll meet up with them. We're having Christmas dinner at my friend Dylan's house."
This statement caused Owen to glance at me. Dylan was, in fact, a female friend of mine, but I could tell by the look on his face that he assumed otherwise, and the hint of jealousy in his expression left me breathless.
"Is Dylan your boyfriend?" Shelby asked, raising her eyebrows at me.
"No, just a friend," I said smiling. I probably should have clarified about the male/female thing, but for whatever reason, I didn't.
We decorated the gingerbread house and shared a cordial conversation for a little while before I glanced at the clock and realized how late it was. I touched Kacie's arm to get her attention, and she turned to face me.
"We better get going," I said. "We're leaving in the morning and I still have to pack."
She smiled and nodded before glancing at Mrs. Carter. "Thank you so much for letting us come in and decorate with y'all," she said.
"Yeah, this was really amazing," I said. I to
ok a step back and regarded the house, appreciating how much it had changed. We had all been working hard on it for over an hour, and it was far more colorful than before. It wasn't yet complete, but it was getting there. It looked gorgeous—full of rows and rows of colorful candy. Kacie asked if she could take a selfie with it to post on her Instagram, and Mrs. Carter was delighted to let her do so.
The Carters asked if we needed a ride home, but we told them that Kacie's car was parked at Mr. Sanders's house, which was only two doors down. There was no opportunity for me to communicate specifically with Owen without being totally obvious, and I hated that. It broke my heart to see him so briefly and casually and then leave him again.
Everyone waved at us and wished us a Merry Christmas as we walked to the door. We stopped in the foyer long enough to put on our hats and coats. I was wrapping my scarf around my neck when movement caught my eye. I smiled when I realized it was Owen. He smiled back at me, and my heart melted. He had gone and become a man since the last time I saw him, and I was more infatuated with him than ever. I loved the scruffy facial hair and the way he dressed so clean but casual.
"I figured I would walk you ladies to your car if you don't mind," he said.
"Of course we don't!" Kacie said.
"Ever the gentleman," I said nostalgically as I watched him take his jacket off the hook and shrug into it. He pulled the hood over his head and zipped the zipper before stepping forward to open the door for us.
I wanted so badly to take his arm, or hold his hand, or otherwise make some kind of physical contact with him, but we walked down the road without touching it all. He, Liam, and Shelby had talked about some of their family Christmas traditions while we were decorating the house, and I caught myself feeling sorry that I would miss all of it. I knew I would have a nice time in New York, but part of me longed to stay in Memphis and have Christmas with the Bishops.
Before I knew it, we had made it to Kacie's car. She got into the driver's seat, telling Owen goodbye and wishing him Merry Christmas.
My Little Gypsy Page 4