Circus Solace

by Chris Castle

“I think…I think she would have liked this, son,” Pa said and finally looked back over his shoulder. “I think she would have been proud of you.”

  “Of us,” Matt said and edged closer to Pa. “All of us.”

  “All of us,” he repeated and then for a long while, long enough for the full moon to appear before them, like an old friend, the two of them sat on the roof, watching the night sky change before them. Sometimes they talked and sometimes they sat in silence, until, at last, it was time to sleep and wait for what came next.

  *

  Matt woke at dawn.

  He was not surprised to hear Pa was up and around, cooking breakfast and opening all the windows and doors. Even before he drew back the curtains, Matt could sense the rising sun in the sky. Sure enough, when he looked out to the field, the sky was blue and it already felt warm in the air. By the time he walked downstairs, the breakfast was on the table and the juice poured.

  “Sleep okay?” Pa asked as Matt bounded into the room.

  “Not really; you?”

  “Same,” he said and grinned at Matt. “Going to be a beautiful day for it, I think,” he continued and sat.

  “I thought maybe I’d go check the stalls after this,” Matt said and saw Pa smile.

  “Too much energy, huh?” he said. Matt nodded. “I feel the same way.”

  They went out into the field and did the last minute spot checks. Marcus and Lucas arrived earlier than expected and Matt noticed they carried the same nervous energy. Matt spent time with Marcus, setting up the food and making sure everything was in its right place. Soon enough, Mr. Stopper and Max appeared, along with Bobby and Sara. Although there was nothing really to do, everyone seemed busy, flitting around and flapping, laughing anxiously and asking questions only to repeat them, minutes later. The tension seemed to fizz and crackle as if a storm were brewing. It felt as if something could break, even though everything was in place. For a moment, the heat seemed to grow muggy and sticky, the sky overhead grey. Matt looked back to the house and somehow all the old tilts and awkward angles seemed to have returned to its beams and rafters.

  This was the moment Cirrus the Clown, the Mayor of Moon Dip Falls, appeared over the sickly horizon and walked towards them.

  “Now what do we have here?” He shouted. As he marched over the grass, his clown shoes made a horribly squeaky, flapping noise and left ugly imprints on the ground. His two goons followed on either side of him, struggling to keep pace and sweating.

  “It looks to me like we have a serious breach of the law!” he screeched, his voice pitching high, the sound of fingers and nails pressed too hard against fully formed balloons.

  “We are just-” Pa began to say but was cut off by the clown as he reached the centre of the field, where everyone had gathered. He was in full clown regalia but there was more to him this time. Around his wrists were jewellery made of grape storks and vines. Empty of the fruit they looked like bracelets of thorns. The same thorny prickles were around his throat and his ankles. It looked as if he had been tortured or was waiting to torture. Matt felt his stomach roil.

  “As mayor, I will not allow unlicensed performances to be conducted in my town. It is against the rules we have set for this fair town and rubs against the very fibre of the standards we have set for our community.” He finished with a flourish, squeezing the flower head in his lapel to shoot a jet of water onto the ground, just missing Matt’s shoes. There was something unclean about the water that made Matt flinch. He peered down to the ground and saw the blades of grass that had been sprayed immediately wither and brown.

  “As my councilman for the public sector,” he bellowed turning and pointing with a painted nail to the goon on the left. “And my councilman for parks and recreations,” he went on, pointing to the second goon on the right. “Have correctly brought to my attention, this whole…shambles is a breach of so many codes civil order, I can barely count!”

  “We’ve done nothing wrong,” Lucas said, coming up to the front, by Matt’s side. In the next moment Max was out in the sunlight, wincing and finally Marcus. Together they formed a protective wall alongside Pa.

  “You do nothing without me!” Cirrus screamed and as much as Matt wanted to take a step back, he held firm next to his friends.

  “If this monstrosity is not torn down within the hour, I will see to it this place is not only dismantled but burned to the ground. Razed! Flambéed! B-B-Q!” He stepped closer to Pa, so his bright red nose touched. It made a little squeaking noise.

  “By the time I’m through, there will only be more ashes to add to the pot,” he snarled, his wild yellow eyes glowing with hate and rage. Matt thought of rabid dogs, wild with infection and flies hovering around the sockets.

  “Excuse me!” Came a voice from the horizon. Everyone, including the clown, turned to see where this new voice had come from. Mrs. Slurpslacker, Em, stepped out of the shadows of the house and into the light.

  “I have the by-laws for the town right here, Mr. Cirrus,” she said, clutching a wad of papers in her hand. She stopped a foot away from the clown and waited for him to face her. He turned, very slowly, as if she was just a passer-by to wave at before returning to the main event.

  “The post mistress,” he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “None so fierce as those almighty posties,” he went on, briefly glancing at the papers in her hand.

  “Sir, I have paperwork in my hand that clearly states that this celebration should suffer no obstruction and poses no difficulties to the town of Moon Dip Falls.” Her voice was shaky and for a moment Matt wanted for all the world to reach out and hold her hand. As scared as she was, the woman did not look away and her voice did not fade away completely. Matt could feel how proud everyone was of her.

  “As I was mentioning to the rest of these rag-tags, postie, my representatives here have the necessary gear to state that no public entertainment can be conducted, and so say all of us, blah and blah…” he plucked the sheets from the goon’s hands and jammed them into hers. “So, little mouse, why don’t you scurry back to your tiny building and let me go about my business?”

  “You’re wrong,” she said quietly and then looked up from the paper. Her eyes were burning now and even the clown seemed a little taken aback by the strength she seemed to find.

  “These are for paying events,” she said, her voice rising with the conviction of the truth. “I don’t see anyone holding hands out here,” she went on. “I don’t see a toll or tickets being sold. There’s no money being exchanged here, mayor.”

  For a second no-one said a word.

  The mayor seemed to sway for a moment, as if someone had struck him. Then, in the next second, Em seemed to grow taller, as if the goodwill and hope of everyone had somehow made her ten feet tall. She stepped forward, even as the mayor stood back. Something in him seemed to shrink, a garish balloon, slowly deflating.

  “You are wrong mayor and your ‘colleagues’ are holding the wrong papers. Maybe you do not understand something in the community that does not involve greed and cash but only relies on goodwill, sir, but these people clearly do. I have also taken the time to ask everyone who will be in attendance today to sign my papers. Here it is sir.” She handed a sheet of paper over that seemed to have an endless stream of names and signatures. For a moment Matt frowned. But that would mean…

  “And here they are to see the show,” Em continued and from over the horizon people began to appear, walking towards them. “All the folks of Moon Dip Falls and the others who’ve come to see something good and true,” she said, as the streams of people began to walk towards the fields. Matt could hear gasps around him and felt his own mouth fall open in shock.

  “So many people,” the clown muttered, scarcely believing his eyes. The sun had risen out from the clouds and the muggy grey of before disappeared as quickly as it arrived. Matt watched as the clown’s make-up began to sag and drip under the intense sunlight, as if he were melting. Underneath the make-up and goo, a sad little man
began to appear. He was nothing but a bully growing weak with the truth.

  “I…I” he stammered and then turned and stormed away, his two goons chasing after him in dumb confusion. The three of them scurried away, looking like a single limp cloud on an otherwise perfect day. As the streams of people gathered, the sad little bullies disappeared, as if swallowed up by the house itself. The house suddenly appeared straighter and looked more beautiful than ever before.

  “Three cheers for Em!” roared Lucas and from every side, a cheer ripped into the air.

  *

  The momentum of the day carried on from that one, perfect scene. The folks from the town, having either seen or heard about Em, stepped into the field buzzing with energy. Matt could hear people talking, whispering, laughing, and making the whole place come alive. It said something when Lucas was drowned out by the people around him, each of them animatedly re-creating Em’s speech, right up to the way she held the papers and the petition aloft.

  As the story grew and grew, the performers quietly slipped into their roles and positions. Ms. Solstice went about her small hut, fussing and tidying but all the while with a look of contentment in her eyes, as if she were home. The others walked up to the platforms and the stages, admiring the wires and beams. It was only as they slipped off jackets and coats to reveal their costumes that the people around them edged back a little, realising who they were. Yet, there was no fanfare; Stunt-man Steve stood around, mingling with the townsfolk, chatting away and entertaining one and all with his stories. Sara showed a group of kids how to carry out a handstand and Tracker Willis moved from one group to the next, passing on helpful suggestions for lost items. There was no distance, Matt noticed; it was a community where everyone really did want to talk to one another.

  Eventually, the stalls went up and people excitedly walked over to see the attractions and listen to the music. Everywhere Matt wandered, people seemed to be squeezing into one place or rushing to the next. By the time Lucas stepped into the middle of the impromptu ring, people hovered at the fringes, glued to the music or dazzled by the magic. Lucas’ voice carried to all corners of the field and drew everyone in. As he spoke, Sara shimmered and sparkled in the corner, limbering up, getting ready to perform to an audience that was cemented in place by Lucas’ voice and her movement.

  The show was spectacular.

  From Sara’s gymnastics, from the high wire to the trapeze, the cannonball and the tumblers and the slinky…well, Matt didn’t think he’d ever see anything quite like the slinky ever again no matter what else he saw and wherever else he travelled in the world. Matt stood with Pa and cheered right along, gasped, laughed and clapped until his hands felt bruised at the palm. As the performers came on for an encore Matt slipped to the back of the crowd and found Pa doing the same. As they took a step back from the crowds and the show, Tracker Willis came up on their shoulder.

  “Some show, huh?” he said with a voice that was so deep, even a question didn’t seem to rise in pitch.

  “Some show,” Pa said, his voice tired and delighted at the same time.

  “You headed over to Ms. Solstice’s hut yet?” He went on, looking over to Matt. “Maybe the two of you should try it out, okay?”

  “Okay,” Matt said and looked over to Pa, who shrugged in agreement.

  As they stepped into the hut, Matt noticed the place was empty, even though it had been full most of the day. It was a small place but nothing in it seemed cramped. Matt saw the tea cups, the leaves read and stacked to one side. On the far wall were letters pinned up for all to see, while on the tables, small trays were laid out for the palm readings. Matt walked over to the wall; the magenta letters written by The Gent glowed and almost hummed against the walls. He was drawn to them but something tugged his eyes to a single sheet that was a different shade, the writing slightly different in shape and size.

  “Pa,” Matt said, feeling his heart tighten. In a moment, Pa was by his side and both of them were peering towards the letter in the centre of the wall.

  “Tracker Willis sent you over.” Both of them turned and saw Marcus standing in the doorway. He nodded to the sheet of paper glowing on the wall. “The two of us found this after you started talking about fixing the town.”

  “Is it-” Pa’s voice faded and Matt found his own throat was too tight to speak.

  “It’s from her diary. Ms. Solstice has it under the counter. It’s waiting for you.” He looked over to the woman, who smiled.

  “I don’t know what to say,” Pa whispered.

  “It’s our gift to you, for everything the both of you have done for us,” Marcus said. He looked at them both. “Turn around and look at the paper.”

  “How does this work?” Matt managed to ask.

  “Forget everything else, Matt; forget me, the hut, everything outside. Just focus on the words in-front of you, give everything to her words and listen for her voice. Use your strength together, like you have since the moment you stepped foot in Moon-Dip Falls.”

  Matt looked at the words, the same mazy handwriting he’d found written on the chimney of their house all that time ago. He stared and felt Pa do the same. Matt felt them connect, their thoughts linking until everything, even the huge cheers of the crowd outside, seemed to slip away until there were only his ma’s words in his mind. The words seemed to glisten and sparkle and become more, more than letters and ink until finally, her voice, as she was then, blossomed out into the space between them.

  Moon Dip Falls is my favourite place in the world. On most days it’s fine but on days like these, when we have the circus and everyone comes together, it’s the most perfect time in the world. Sometimes, folks have asked me what my favourite part is in the show. They wait, expecting me to say the trapeze, or the music, maybe even the dancing. And as fine as they all are, I always say the same. My favourite moment in the Circus Solace is to step away and watch the crowd. To see the children’s faces, to see couples holding hands, to see every one of them lost in something, something good. That is what makes it perfect to me. Other folks, they ask me what the secret is, to the tricks and the magic and I always take my time, as if I’m really thinking about my answer, when in truth, I know within a moment what I will say. I look them in the eye and I tell these good people it’s the town that makes its own magic, pure and simple. When my pa came here, the house was just shadows and wood but with our love and attention it became a home. It’s the same with the circus, from the high wire right down to the card tricks on the lawn. It’s the magic in one another that makes it all come alive.

  There will come a day when I’ll leave this place. I don’t want to now but I know one day it will happen. but I’ll know that wherever I go and whoever I meet ( and whoever I’ll fall in love with!) will have to measure up to Moon Dip Falls and the Circus Solace. I know that and it means I’ll never be frightened because I know whoever I spend my time with is as good as the Falls is now… and that means I’ll be happy and create happiness in others in return and I don’t think anyone can ask for anymore in this life than that.

  I’ll write again, but until tomorrow, know all my thoughts will be forever with you,

  X

  Amy

  Matt reached the end of the letter and felt tears in his eyes. They were running freely but he didn’t mind; he wasn’t embarrassed. He looked over and saw Pa’s eyes mirrored his own. Matt reached out and felt Pa’s hand envelope his own. Another hand fell onto his shoulder and another. Fingers ruffled his hair and he became aware of all his new friends standing by him and Pa, forming a wall of love, keeping the two of them, no, the three of them, safe as they started their new life in Moon Dip Falls. He squeezed Pa’s hand tighter and in the other, his friend Marcus handed him his ma’s diary. Outside, the audience cheered louder than ever before.

  *

  * * * * THE END * * * *

 

 

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