During a lull at the checkout counter, Rosalyn went up to the loft level to straighten the dwindling stacks of place mats and linens. Through the window she saw flakes of snow drifting placidly in the pale gray sky—but when she noticed a man loading a large truck across town, her pulse raced.
“Loretta, look—in front of the house! What do you make of that?” she called over the loft railing.
When her sister peered out the downstairs window, she sucked in her breath. “My word, there’s Dat—and he’s carrying tool cases out to that truck! Did he say anything to you about getting rid of his business?”
As Rosalyn hurried down the stairs, Nora joined Loretta at the window. “Do you think he’s moving away?”
“I have no idea!” Loretta blurted. “He hasn’t spoken to us since Sunday—”
“Maybe you should go check it out,” Nora suggested with a worried frown. “I’d hate to think he would leave without telling you.”
Moments later Rosalyn and her sister were hurrying along the shoulder of the county highway, tying the strings of their black bonnets as they went. She had a strange feeling in the pit of her stomach . . . a sense that they were about to receive yet another unpleasant surprise.
“What are we going to say?” Loretta asked breathlessly. “Surely Dat doesn’t figure to duck out of town without letting us know.”
“Or without serving the six weeks of his bann so he can get back into the gut graces of the church,” Rosalyn added. “Do you suppose he’s heading back to Roseville?”
“I can’t begin to predict what Dat might be up to,” Loretta replied sadly. “Oh, my—the driver is closing the back of the big truck. We’d better run along.”
Heedless of the puddles and piles of snow along the roadside, Rosalyn broke into a sprint. Her heart contracted into a tight ball when they reached the lane and then bounded up onto the front porch. She was glad Loretta was bold enough to open the door and go in ahead of her.
“Dat?” Loretta called out. “Dat? What’s going on?”
Rosalyn was relieved to see that the front-room furniture was all in place—but the expression on their father’s face as he stepped out of the kitchen brought her to a sudden stop.
“What does it look like I’m doing?” he asked impatiently. “If you can leave this house, well—so can I! Why should I stay here when no one—not even the daughters I worked hard all my life to support—bothers speaking to me?”
Rosalyn was struck dumb. Guilt niggled at her even as Loretta stepped backward to stand beside her rather than move any closer to Dat.
“We didn’t think you would—where will you go?” Loretta rasped.
“Why do you care?” their father challenged them bitterly. “I’m as free as a bird and I’ll be fine wherever I land. Don’t try to talk me into staying—and don’t spend another moment worrying about me, all right?”
The sarcastic edge to his voice warned Rosalyn against making any protest. For once, maybe it was best to do as her father said—to remain silent rather than coax him to stay . . . which would give him more words to twist into arrows and more time to shoot them into her heart. She almost suggested that he send them his new address, but the grim line of his mouth stifled that idea.
“Why don’t you go on back to playing store with Nora?” he suggested brusquely. “I don’t need you gawking after me as I leave town. Shoo!”
When he started toward them with a malicious laugh, waving his hands, Rosalyn bolted out the door. Loretta’s footsteps clattered across the wooden porch and down the stairs with hers, but instead of heading back into town, they hurried across the road to Edith’s house. They didn’t stop running until they reached the door and let themselves inside.
“Edith!” Loretta called out. “Did you see—”
“Jah, I’m here at the kitchen window,” their sister replied. She turned toward them with a tear-streaked face, shaking her head. “I didn’t have the nerve to go over there—didn’t want to leave the twins, or take them, either. What did he say?”
“Oh, Dat’s as free as a bird,” Loretta began in a ragged voice.
“Jah, why should he stay here when no one—not even the daughters he supported all their lives—is speaking to him,” Rosalyn recounted ruefully.
“It was awful,” Loretta whispered. “He was so nasty—”
“He lunged at us and shooed us away,” Rosalyn put in.
Only when the three of them shared an embrace, their arms around each other’s waists and shoulders, did it feel safe to cry . . . to consider what had just happened in the house across the road. The pain felt so raw that she and Loretta didn’t even remove their wraps as they clung to their younger sister.
“I—I’m so glad Mamm’s not around to see what’s happened to him,” Edith murmured.
“Well, if she were still here, Dat probably wouldn’t have gotten into gambling,” Rosalyn pointed out between sobs.
“Or maybe he would have—or he might’ve found some other nasty habit,” Loretta speculated with a sigh. “We’ll never know. And truth be told, I’ve found out enough about our father this week that I don’t want to learn any more. This is a terrible, unthinkable thing to say,” she continued in a thin voice, “but our lives will be a whole lot easier without him. It’s clear he doesn’t intend to pay back any of the money he stole.”
As the truth of Loretta’s remarks weighed her down like a wet wool blanket, Rosalyn began to cry harder. She and her sisters had spent their entire lives trying to be model Amish daughters—struggling to be good enough, to measure up to Dat’s expectations of them—and it seemed their efforts had been for nothing. Their anguished tears flowed freely for a few minutes, until little arms wrapped around Rosalyn’s and Edith’s knees.
“Mama! Mama!” Louisa called out.
“Woof, woof !” Leroy chimed in.
Rosalyn and Edith leaned down to lift the twins to their hips, but the three sisters remained in a close huddle. It was hard to remain upset when she was cuddling her nephew, who held his stuffed dog to her face. “Jah, we love Doggie, ain’t so, Leroy?” she asked after she’d placed a noisy pretend kiss on the toy’s head. “We love you punkins, too—”
“And we’re glad when you remind us what’s most important,” Loretta said. She wiped her face with the back of her hand. “We don’t know what’s gotten into your dawdi—”
“Who has ever really known him?” Edith asked softly, shaking her head.
“—but we still have each other,” Loretta continued with a nod. “We’ll figure out what to do about him and that empty house, all in gut time.”
Rosalyn drew a deep breath. Her thoughts about Dat were now tainted by the image of him rushing at her and Loretta, leering as he shooed them out. It would be a while before the emotional wounds he’d inflicted in the past few days would heal. “Do you suppose he really means to stay away?” she whispered. “Or is he just . . . laying on more guilt—until he comes back when we least expect him, begging for our forgiveness?”
Edith shrugged. “Only God knows the answer to that.”
“If he does show up, the folks around town will stand by us,” Loretta said in a more hopeful voice. “They’ve all—especially Nora—made us girls welcome, and they’ve accepted Drew and Asa, as well. We’ve got a home here. That’s what matters.”
Rosalyn felt strengthened by Loretta’s faith in their neighbors—and no matter what Dat did in the future, he couldn’t sever the bond she and her sisters shared. She clung to that thought as she wiped the last of her tears. “We left Nora to handle a store full of customers, on a very busy shopping day,” she said. “After all she’s done for us, we really need to get back.”
“Jah, helping folks find gifts that make them happy will make us happier, too,” Loretta said as she eased away from their huddle.
“I’ m putting on a big pot of chili for supper,” Edith said. “You and Drew should join us so we’ll all be together tonight. We may be having a simple Christmas th
is year—different from the holiday we were expecting—but we still have plenty to celebrate.”
Rosalyn nodded. “You said that just right, Edith. I’ll be back in plenty of time to bake some cornbread—”
“And I’ll bring dessert!” Loretta put in. “Many hands make light work of supper.”
As she and Loretta left the warmth of Edith’s kitchen, the wind felt cold and damp when it whipped at their bonnets. Rosalyn walked quickly along the shoulder of the road, with Loretta following behind her so they wouldn’t get splattered by cars driving through the puddles on the blacktop.
The aroma of grilled meats tantalized her as they passed the Grill N Skillet, where the lunch shift was in full swing. Up ahead, the big wooden wheel of the mill spun slowly—which meant that Luke and Ira were grinding grain, taking advantage of another day before the surface of the river froze over. Plenty of vans, cars, and a few buggies were still parked at the Simple Gifts store, so Rosalyn composed herself. She felt grateful that the brisk business in Nora’s shop would keep her too occupied to stew over the unsettling encounter they’d had with Dat . . . and the thought that they might never see him again.
As she and Loretta slipped through the store’s back door, Rosalyn inhaled the fragrance of bayberry candles and fresh greenery to soothe her soul. Nora was busy running the cash register—no time for questions. Rosalyn joined her to bag customers’ purchases as though she’d only slipped away for a bathroom break, while Loretta mingled among the ladies who were still shopping.
“I called the Grill N Skillet,” Nora whispered as the next gal stepped up to the counter. “Seemed like a great day to have hot food delivered for lunch.”
“Bless you,” Rosalyn said softly. “That sounds so much better than the cold sandwich I brought with me this morning.”
Even with the carols playing on the sound system and the shoppers’ happy smiles, Rosalyn had to pretend she felt the season’s cheer. Edith’s remark about having a simple Christmas—being blessed with sisterly support that would get them through a holiday shattered by Dat’s gambling—almost made her cry again. It was a good thing that just then her sister carried a stack of pottery pieces over to the worktable for a lady who was buying six place settings.
“I’ve taken the tags off these dishes,” Loretta said, “so if you’ll start wrapping them, I’ll find a couple of sturdy boxes to pack them in.”
Rosalyn nodded, grateful for a task that would allow her to focus on something other than customers. Over the past few weeks she’d wrapped so many plates, cups, and bowls with brown kraft paper that her hands worked while her mind wandered. The table sat beneath one of the speakers, so she couldn’t help hearing the carol that was playing. It was an instrumental piece, but the words ran through her head.
Deck the halls with boughs of holly—
The happy song clashed with her grim mood, and it reminded her of red candles, fresh greenery wreaths, and Mamm’s Nativity scene. Maybe she should take the crèche over to Edith’s place so they could all enjoy it—and so the holy family and the wise men wouldn’t spend Christmas in an empty house.
’Tis the season to be jolly—
Rosalyn wrapped faster—anything to keep from thinking about the difficult Christmas ahead of her. She and her sisters faced some big decisions because Dat had left them with unpaid utility bills and a huge debt that would hang over Willow Ridge like a dark cloud for months to come.
Fa la la la la—
Would this song never end? The carol’s gaiety reminded Rosalyn of her first date with Marcus—that picture-perfect winter night of gliding across snow-covered fields, and laughing over pizza. On that rarified evening she’d dared to dream that she and Marcus might become a couple.
But his tentative conversation and long silences after the members’ meeting had sent a different message. She hadn’t heard a word from him since their brief sleigh ride on Wednesday. Rosalyn pushed her thoughts of Marcus aside, glad that Loretta had come over to pack the wrapped pieces of pottery in the boxes she’d found.
“I’m amazed at how much stuff we’re selling today,” her sister remarked beneath the music and the customers’ conversations. “We only have a few odd pieces of pottery left, and the quilted pot holders and place mats are all gone. You’d think folks had nowhere else to shop—”
“Ho ho ho! Lunch delivery!” a familiar female voice called out behind them.
“We were at the Grill N Skillet when Nora called, so we decided to save Savilla a delivery trip,” a man chimed in. “That place is just as busy as this one.”
Rosalyn turned to greet Rebecca and Wyatt. As she inhaled the aromas of warm barbecue and cheese coming from the boxes they carried, she was immediately struck by the glow on their faces—as though the world couldn’t possibly get any happier now that they were engaged. “Probably best to put the food in Nora’s office,” she suggested. “We’ve got a lady waiting for these pottery pieces—”
“But you girls should eat your lunch as soon as you finish wrapping them,” Nora insisted behind them. “I can’t have my best elves keeling over from starvation.”
Loretta’s chuckle sounded a bit reserved. “You go first, sister,” she suggested. “I can finish wrapping these dishes in a jiffy.”
Rosalyn didn’t have much appetite, so she hoped Rebecca’s happiness would lift her spirits. When she stepped into the small office to set out the food, however, Wyatt’s handsome face tightened.
He turned to her, lowering his voice. “You don’t happen to know where Marcus made off to, do you?”
Rosalyn’s heart stopped. She gripped the foil-wrapped pan of cheesy potatoes she’d been unwrapping. “Wh-what do you mean?”
Wyatt shrugged. “He left a note in his apartment that didn’t tell me much. Must’ve driven away sometime Wednesday evening,” he explained in a concerned voice. “I was sort of hoping he’d taken you with him, because that would at least explain—”
“Not that you’re the kind of girl who would’ve ridden off with Marcus in his car,” Rebecca put in quickly.
Rosalyn was aware that she was gaping, yet she couldn’t gather any rational thoughts to answer the two people who were gazing so intently at her. It stung her to the core that despite the way Rebecca and Wyatt assumed Marcus had deep feelings for her, he hadn’t even told her . . . goodbye.
First Dat and now Marcus. Why have both of them left me just days before Christmas? Rosalyn’s throat burned and she turned away to hide her tears.
Rebecca grasped Rosalyn’s shoulders. “I’m sorry, honey,” she murmured. “We haven’t shown any consideration for your feelings. It’s obviously as big a surprise to you as it was to us.”
“Jah, well—” Rosalyn shuddered as she let out a long sigh. “About half an hour ago Loretta and I watched Dat take off for parts unknown, too, so—I’m sorry I’m so upset—”
“Oh my word, you have every reason to be upset,” Rebecca murmured as she hugged Rosalyn close. “I’m so sorry about your dat, Rosalyn. This is all very confusing.”
“If you or your family need anything,” Wyatt put in earnestly, “let me know how I can help. From what I’ve heard, your dad’s left a lot of loose ends for you and your sisters to deal with.”
Loretta stepped into the office with a worried look on her face. “I couldn’t help hearing what you said about Marcus—”
“And you have no idea where he went?” Nora put in as she, too, came into the small room. “Why would Marcus leave, when he was doing so well at training your horses?”
Wyatt shook his head. “I wish I knew. He’s progressed so much more than I ever expected, I was ready to take him on as a partner—to make him the manager of my Willow Ridge farm, with a pay raise and benefits so he could support a family,” he said sadly. “I thought he was as comfortable working with me as I was with him.”
Rosalyn blotted her face with her sleeve. She regretted what she was about to say, but she didn’t see any way around it. “Nora, I really ha
te to leave you when you’ve got so many customers, but—”
“I totally understand why you don’t feel like working anymore today—and you, too, Loretta,” Nora put in quickly. “I do wish you’d eat some of this fine-smelling lunch before you go, though. It looks like Savilla sent us enough to feed a small army.”
Loretta pondered the situation—and the fragrant containers of food. “I’d rather stay busy this afternoon, and think about all this stuff later,” she said softly. “I’ll eat a quick bite and get back to work.”
Rosalyn shook her head as she took her coat and bonnet from the rack. “Denki, Nora, but my stomach’s in knots. I’ll pull myself together and be back to work tomorrow morning.”
As she stepped out the back door, Rebecca was offering to help Nora for the rest of the day. Once outside, Rosalyn stood absolutely still, staring at the river and the mill, and then at Ira and Millie’s modest white house and at the seemingly endless white plank fencing that marked Wyatt’s horse farm on the other side of the river. The gray sky and snow-covered hills made a dreary backdrop for a winter landscape that suddenly seemed bleak and colorless. A gust of wind sent snowflakes and a few dead leaves skittering ahead of it.
Rosalyn shivered. She had no idea what to do.
Did Marcus leave because he was dissatisfied with his job, or with Willow Ridge? Or did he sneak off to avoid dealing with me?
As she started walking, Rosalyn recalled how Marcus had ridiculed this little town the day he’d arrived and how his dubious reputation had preceded him. Maybe it was for the best that he’d left town before he’d made her any promises—although he’d surely known he’d be breaking her heart. Bishop Tom and Preacher Ben would be disappointed that Marcus hadn’t followed through with his plans to join the Old Order, too. But at least if he’d realized he preferred to live English, he hadn’t taken his church vows and then broken them.
It’s almost as though Marcus never came to town.
Rosalyn let out a humorless laugh as she headed toward the county highway. It was senseless to pretend that Marcus hadn’t changed her life—hadn’t given her such a heady sense of hope that she’d dared to believe she’d be a wife and a mother someday. A lot of what-ifs and if-onlys filled her troubled mind as her feet somehow placed themselves one in front of the other. She didn’t stop walking until she was climbing the porch steps of the house where she and her sisters had lived with Dat.
A Simple Christmas Page 24