Nothing Matters (Family Matters Book 1)

by Key, Liana

  He told me his name was Nathan, but that I could call him Nate. I told him my name was Magdala, and that's what he could call me. Nobody shortens my name, with the exception of Jakey who will on occasion call me Maggy, usually when he's pissed with me. But it's funny, I've only ever called Nathan by his full name, and it seemed that I was the only one who did. I liked that, liked that I had some unique connection with him.

  Before going to get something to eat, I suggested we detour to the beach, thinking I wanted some alone time with him before we met up with the others. I could just imagine Jakey and Cassian scrutinizing him, giving him the evil eye. He parked and turned off the engine and the lights, and faced me. Nothing was said. He leaned towards me, finding my lips - it wasn't hard, I was ready and willing. We kissed, and it was like the Fourth of July, an explosion of fireworks that left my head spinning. I was thrilled by the spontaneity of it all, the intensity, the passion.

  His phone vibrated and he pulled his lips off mine with a gradual separation, read the text and grinned. "We should go," he said, "they're waiting for us." But he leaned into me again, more urgently, like there was no time to waste, and his mouth sucked my skin, his teeth nipped at my neck and I did nothing to resist. And we drove to meet the others, but I knew then that this would be no ordinary romance, it felt like my heart had just been jump started.

  NATHAN

  It seemed it was a bad week to meet her, because she was so busy, like every night. She had some sort of concert coming up that apparently demanded hours of piano practice every night, and then a performance on the Thursday night. I asked if I could come and she said No, it was a classical concert with violins and harps and cellos and I would hate it. Only parents and grandparents came to it, she texted, or people over the age of seventy. She sent three laughing face emoticons.

  She unexpectedly rings me on the Wednesday night. Ben and I are shooting hoops, something we always do after dinner. I answer with a casual, "Hi, what's up?"

  "I just needed to hear your voice," she says, "I can't remember what it sounds like."

  "Oh? And now that you're hearing it?"

  "Mmmm, I remember now," she says.. "Are you playing basketball?" I guess she can hear Ben bouncing and shooting the ball.

  "Yeah, just with my brother," I say, walking away from him, out towards the front fence, for some privacy. "Have you finished your piano practice?"

  "Yes, we finished early. Big night tomorrow," she sounded quite excited about it. I guessed it was something she was passionate about, even though she'd told me several times how boring I'd think the music was.

  "When do you think we can meet up?" I ask. I'm so desperate to see her again, but I don't want to sound it. "How about Friday?"

  She hesitates. "Yeah, I think Friday will be good."

  "I miss you," I say, and that's not something I planned to say..

  "Really?"

  "Yes," I say. "What are you doing at the moment?"

  "I'm just looking at some homework."

  "I can't wait to kiss you again," I say, again a totally unplanned declaration. What is wrong with my brain?

  "Well I can't concentrate on algebra now, can I?" She laughs. "Where do you want to kiss me?"

  I laugh, turn around, even though there's no way Ben can hear me. "Well I'll start at your lips, then I'll kiss the tip of your nose, then I'll go across to your ears, down your neck..." I pause, wondering if I just sound ridiculous or what.

  "You're not going to stop there are you?" she asks, and I inhale deeply.

  "No, I'm not going to stop there," I say boldly. "My tongue is going down to your breasts and your nipples are going to harden and - ." Hell I don't know about her nipples, but a part of me was definitely hardening.

  "And what?" she asks impatiently, but with a giggle.

  It makes me giggle, and I say, "Is this what they call phone sex?" And I know I'm blushing, thankful she can't see me.

  "I don't know," she laughs. "But I quite like it. Continue."

  "Where was I?" I laugh, "Oh yeah, I'm at your breasts, it's like heaven, your skin is so warm and soft." I hear the giggle again. "Then my tongue goes down your body, to your belly, to your belly button." Fuck me, where is this coming from. I've never done this before. Is my imagination running away with me?

  "Better make sure I've washed it then," she laughs, and I laugh too. "Then?"

  "Then?" Then, I fuck you, I want to say. But I stop myself. She'd run a mile, or further. "You'll have to wait for Friday...to find out," I say, trying to sound mysterious.

  "No,” she exclaims. "Now I'll forget all my music because I'm wondering what's going to happen on Friday. I'll play horribly tomorrow!"

  I laugh. Wow, I just know I'm going to fall in love with her, if I haven't already. "Well tomorrow, at your concert, just imagine that for playing perfectly, your reward will be a night with me." Fuck, how conceited is that. What the hell am I saying? Has some demon possessed me?

  "Is that a promise?" she asks sexily. Fuck I wish I was in the bathroom now.

  "A promise," I confirm.

  We both laugh and we say goodnight.

  The next night she texts me with: didn't play one wrong note :)

  I text back: can't wait for tomorrow :)

  MAGDALA

  It was another week before I saw Nathan again, and I'd spent that week dreaming and fantasizing about him, about us. I hadn't slept properly the whole week and my appetite disappeared too. We had arranged to meet at the mall and Cassian and his friend Liam had given me a ride, and we were sitting in the food court. I felt nervous waiting, an unsettled feeling that my expectations were too high, all wrong. You know, that fear that you have remembered something wrong. Sometimes it can be something inconsequential like the scent of a perfume that you liked and desperately wanted, but when you go back to it, it's not how you remembered. Or a pair of shoes that you fell in love with, but are totally not the color you thought they were. I'd remembered Nathan in my head, texted or spoken to him every day since meeting him, but as I waited, I couldn't quite remember how his hair was, or the shape of his face, or whether he had pierced ears. And that crazy phone conversation we'd had, which I was feeling slightly embarrassed about now. So easy to be forward and brave when you're just a voice on the phone. My gaze kept darting around, not knowing from what direction he would appear. Cassian and Liam were talking and eating, but I was taking no notice of them. I nervously kept sipping on my water bottle.

  And then I saw him. And my heart went all a flutter. He was dressed in the same black t-shirt and jeans and Converse from the week before. Maybe that was his standard dress. His hair was natural, messy looking, sexy. He was scanning and when he saw me a smile covered his face. He started towards me. I stood up, murmuring to Cassian, "He's here." He had his hands in his jeans pockets, he had a black earring in his left ear. I took a few steps towards him. He looked at me, smiling, showing dimples on both cheeks and I noticed that his two bottom middle teeth crossed over.

  "Hey," he said and he took hold of my shoulders and kissed me. No hello, no how are you. It was all a bit unexpected. I didn't know what to do with my hands, I had a phone in one and a water bottle in the other. He released his lips, said, "I couldn't wait to see you." And kissed me again. This time I relaxed, even though my hands were still awkward, and I was able to participate in the kiss. And everything was suddenly all right.

  "Let's go," he said, and I saw him raise his eyebrows in Cassian's direction, but I was too rushed to turn and say goodbye to him. Nathan had his arm around me and had us walking away. His touch was everything I remembered from last week, there had been no need for apprehension, the spark was ignited.

  "You look like you've been in a hurry," I said.

  "I have," he said, "Traffic sucked and I didn't want to be late." He looked down at me and just something in his gaze made me melt. "You look fantastic by the way," and he kissed my cheek.

  "Thanks," I said, pleased I'd chosen a short dress and straightened
my hair.

  We got some food, sat down to eat, but he didn't even look at his food, he just looked at me. After a few seconds I said, "Your burger's getting cold," as I fingered a French fry.

  "This may sound cheesy, but I could look at you all day," he grinned.

  "Yeah, it does sound cheesy," I laughed, "and a little creepy." I popped a fry into my mouth."So Magdala Strauss," he drawled out my name, "do we have anything in common?" He paused and picked up one of my fries, dangling it in front of my mouth, "Besides this insane attraction to one another?"

  I reached for the fry and popped that one in my mouth too. "I think we both like burgers and fries," I said, and held one up in front of his mouth which he opened. I pushed it in, but he closed his mouth capturing my finger, his tongue sucking on it, and I felt myself shiver and claimed my finger back. I raised my eyebrows, he raised his and we laughed. "I like the colour black," I said, but just because that was all I'd ever seen him dressed him and my dress was black and white.

  "That's two ticks for us," he said.

  "I like surfing, horses and eating popcorn in bed," I said.

  "I like basketball, dogs and," he paused and opened the top of his burger, "doing other things in bed." I swung my leg at him under the table and he feigned pain. He removed the onions and gherkins from his bun and tossed them to the side.

  "I love playing the piano and I hate doing dishes," I said, taking a sip of my soda.

  "I hate playing the piano and I love doing dishes," he said, and I laughed so hard I started coughing and spluttering. He looked at me with a bemused expression, calmly said, "Are you okay?" and proceeded to eat his burger. I finally stopped laughing, wiping my mouth with a napkin. He reached across, touched the side of my mouth, so I wiped harder there.

  And then we just looked at each other again, this time smiling crazily, like I couldn't stop if I tried.

  "Do you have any opinion on gun laws?" he suddenly said. It took me by surprise and I dumbly shook my head. "Climate change?"

  I was puzzled by his questions. "The weather seems to be getting hotter," I replied hesitantly. "Why? Do you?"

  "Not really," he said casually, "I was just checking that you're not too smart for me." And again I laughed and kicked him under the table. "Okay, this is the big one, this is the deal breaker," he said, getting all serious. "If we don't agree on this one I don't know if we can go out. Okay?"

  "Really?" I asked. "It's that important?" I was trying not to smirk, curious as to what he was going to ask.

  "It's that important," he confirmed, his face expressionless. I couldn't help giggling.

  "I'm serious," he said, now unable to suppress a smile. "Deal breaker remember?" I nodded.

  "Clippers or Lakers?" he asked. His eyes studied my face intently. I tried to keep a straight face. I'd seen a Clippers sticker on his back bumper, I knew he was a fan, a fanatical fan I guessed. So was Jakey. He was a manic Clippers supporter.

  I looked at him, started to say something, then pretended I was changing my mind. I clicked my tongue, tapped my fingers as if trying to make a decision. He appeared frustrated by my silence. I leaned forward and said softly, "Clippers." He raised his arms in the air, as if he'd just won the lottery.

  "Magdala Strauss," he said, his face beaming, "I think I'm going to marry you!"

  We drove to the beach, and we were standing by the car kissing, when he turned to me, his hand stroking my hair and said, "I want you." I wanted to say "I want you too," but my heart rate suddenly accelerated and I couldn't seem to utter any words. He was looking at me, trying to gage my reaction. "Don't get the wrong idea," he said, perhaps needing to explain himself, "but you are driving me crazy, and fuck, I want you so bad." And he pressed himself against me, and I could feel his hardness, as he adjusted his stance against mine. I stayed perfectly still, my heart was hammering in my chest. There was no denying the physical attraction between us, it was almost scary, frightening, too powerful. And I only had Stacey as a reference in matters like this, but with Stacey it had never been like this, never so urgent, uncontrollable. I could feel his hands beneath my dress, at the top of my thighs, almost touching my panties.

  "Do you wanna come back to my place?" he whispered.

  "Is that my reward for playing perfectly?" I asked coyly.

  "I did promise that, didn't I?" he laughed, "And I also said I'd do this." His lips moved from my nose to my lips, to my cheek, ears, neck. I felt my body trembling, his hand was rubbing my butt cheek, squeezing it. We separated, unwillingly, and he drove us to his place. I had no memory of the direction we were going, and had a peculiar thought that we would be going to an apartment, similar to Stacey's, don't ask me why. So I was somewhat overcome when he pulled up outside a small suburban house, and then lead me down the path and told me to wait outside the window. A few minutes later the window opened and I realized I was going to have to jump up. I took my shoes off and passed them into him, then clambered up onto the window sill, no grace about it. He pulled me through by my underarms, and he whispered, "Sshhh," as I stumbled in. There was a smell about the room, not disgusting, but not fresh, like maybe boy smell, gym bag, old sneakers, dirty socks? Or dog? I remembered he had a dog.

  "My brother's asleep," he whispered and in the darkness I could see a bunkbed. For some reason I started to giggle, and he kissed me, muffling my sound. He sat me on the side of the bed, kicking his shoes off. My nose started to adjust. The mattress felt thin, it was a bunkbed where the bottom bed was a double and the top a single. We heard his brother shifting. Nathan pulled back the cover, took off his t-shirt. He pulled off my dress and made me slide in first, closest to the wall. He took his jeans off and snuggled in around me. I realized he was already totally naked. He pulled out a condom, asked me whether I was on birth control. I told him I was. His fingers pulled at my panties, and as I wriggled out of them I could see him putting on the condom. He moved on top of me, the mattress squeaking. We both seemed to stop breathing for a moment, and then moved position gently, being as quiet as we could. He kissed me when I started to giggle again. He kicked at the bedcovers in frustration as if they were hampering him, started to move inside me, the mattress, well it seemed the whole bunkbed was squeaking and shaking.

  "Fuck," he mumbled. I moved my body in time with his, establishing a rhythm. The shaking continued. "It's like a fucking earthquake," he said.

  "It's not going to fall apart is it?" I said jokingly, "your brother's not going to fall on us is he?"

  He poked me in the ribs, "Sshhh. And don't worry, I'll get hit first," he said and I couldn't help but laugh. "Fuck, do I have to keep kissing you?" he said, pretending to be angry, but ramming into me deeper, harder, leaving me no oxygen. When he was done, he collapsed to the side of me and sighed, "Wow."

  "Wow good?"

  He propped himself on his elbow, touched my face, brushed back my hair.

  "Wow fan-fucking-tastic," he said, sorted the condom and spooned himself around me. "Do you want me to take you home now?" he whispered, his lips on the back on my neck, one hand cupping a breast. I didn't want to move, I wanted him to be wrapped around me.

  "No," I whispered back, "I want to stay." He kissed my shoulder, his legs entwined around mine.

  "Good," he said, with a laugh, "because I don't want you to go."

  "I'll just text home," I said, reaching for my phone which I'd put under the pillow. I texted Cassian, telling him where I was. He texted back with five question marks.

  The next morning I was woken when he slid back into bed next to me and the mattress squeaked again. He had his boxers on, I guessed he'd used the bathroom. I felt like I needed to go, but didn't like to ask.

  "Hey," he said, " Okay?" I nodded. "I better get you home," he whispered, but he kissed me, and made love to me again, the bed shaking and shuddering again, leaving me giggling, and the sound of his brother tossing above us made me wonder if he had woken up. It was light enough to see we were under a Ferrari duvet cover. It amused me, it
seemed like a cover a kid would have. He feigned offense, "I've had it since I was ten," he laughed, "got it for my birthday."

  He sat up and pulled on his pants, tossed shoes out the window, picked up my dress and smoothed it and placed it on the bed. I quickly dressed, but couldn't find my underwear, and he was already out the window, so I grabbed my phone and followed him.

  "Where are my shoes?" I asked, thinking he had thrown them out the window, watching him shove his feet into his Converse.

  "Sorry," he laughed, "will you need them?"

  "Guess not." He seemed to think it hilarious, as I walked down the path in my bare feet.

  "Can I see you tonight?" he asked. "I'm working till six. I'll bring your shoes, I promise."

  I tried to think what my plans were, but my mind was blank. All I knew was I had a piano lesson at eleven. And of course I wanted to see him again. I wanted a repeat. I didn't even want to be going home now, I wanted to be in his funny, shaky bed, covered in Ferraris.

  As he pulled up to my house, he said, "You won't be in trouble, will you?"

  I shook my head, glad he cared. Stacey would never have had a thought like that.

  "If you find my panties, can you bring them too?" I asked.

  He gaped at me. "Are you sitting in my car with no -?" I smiled and nodded. "Fuck me," he laughed and his hand reached, moved up my thigh, touching. "Fuck," he said, "this is crazy." And as he kissed me, he pushed my dress up and then his lips went and kissed down there, right outside my house.