Chapter Seventeen
We left the Blue Moon. As I drove we discussed what to do next. Eating supper wasn’t an option. Should we confront our local suspects, or should we hightail it to my house and solve the puzzle. The fact we could solve the puzzle while seated and interrogating suspects meant lots of steps and standing on our feet didn’t weigh on our decision. I felt good about our decision until we neared my house. A vulture loomed ready to strike her prey. She even had a rat to fetch her catch.
Lightning veered into the driveway, rather than strike a pedestrian. I stopped the car, stared straight ahead. With my hands shaking, or appearing to shake, I slid my Hershey bar from my pocket, only to find that I needed my knife to slide between two touching almonds. I wondered if I should roll down my window, in case the knife slipped. I sliced a morsel and plopped it into my mouth. I continued to stare straight ahead.
“Cy, there’s a nose pressed against your window.”
“What can I do about it? The windshield wipers only remove scum from the front. Do you want to roll your window down and see if she wants to lie across the hood?”
“I doubt if she’d get close enough to the wipers that they would swipe her.”
“No, but I could hit the gas and then hit the brakes really quick.”
“But then you’d have to clean all the mess up out of the driveway.”
“No, remember, I pay a boy to do that.”
“Wouldn’t he report it?”
“Remember, Lou, we’re cops. I’ll tell him that she had a gun, but the impact knocked the gun so far we’ll never find it.”
The two of us shared a laugh. Some cops think of things they would never do. I couldn’t help thinking that God would give me indigestion or something because of my thoughts.
“Well, Lou, let’s get this over with. Should I send the Welcome Wagon home with a copy of the puzzle so we can keep her out of our hair?”
“Just give her a copy of an eye chart, and tell her not to come back until she’s solved the code. We can let her know that she’s helping her country.”
“I thought what we have is an eye chart.”
“It seems that way.”
“Well, let’s get this over with.”
I opened the door quickly.
“Oh, I’m sorry, Miss Humphert. Was that your knee? I thought you were farther away. You know what they say. ‘Objects in the mirror are closer than they seem.’”
“Oh, that’s okay, Cyrus. I read about how policemen are supposed to help ladies in distress. Maybe you and your friend can come over and nurse me back to health. Maybe you can do therapy on my knee.”
“I’d love to Miss Humphert, but in all my busyness, I’ haven’t had my leprosy shots yet.”
“Oh, Cyrus, you’re so funny. Isn’t he funny, Twinkle Toes?”
“Miss Humphert, you might refer to him as Twinkle Toes, but his name is Sgt. Lou Murdock.”
“I meant my dog, but of course I could call him Twinkle Toes, too.”
“I must be sure to let the guys on the force know that from now on Sgt. Murdock is to be known as Twinkle Toes II. If I know the guys, they’ll be delighted to know that. Well, we’d like to stay and chat, but we’ve been cautioned against spending time with rabid women with dogs. Maybe another time?”
“Absolutely, Cyrus. Maybe you can come over tonight after your friend leaves. You know, check on my knee and see if it’s okay.”
“I’m afraid I can’t, but I might send Twinkle Toes II over before he leaves. And I would do something about that knee, if I were you. I read where it helps if you embed your body in concrete. I cannot remember if you immerse your body in concrete from the neck down or the neck up. Try either or both. I’m sure you’ll see a difference.”
I rushed off so quickly that Lou was left with Heloise Humphert. He felt her hot breath on his face, looked up to see that he alone faced her. He barely escaped her clutches as she grabbed for his shirt.
He was my friend. He hadn’t done anything bad to me that day, so I refrained from locking the door. He yanked open the door and lunged inside.
“What were you trying to do to me, Cy?”
“Just wanted to make sure that Thelma Lou is the one for you. I wanted to give you some options.”
“Don’t ever give me that kind of option again.”
Lou’s body shook until he’d used his teeth to rip open a bag of M&Ms and downed the whole package. Still unsure that he’d survived his scare, he plopped down on the couch until he’d digested his candy.
After Lou recovered from his brush with death, he struggled to his feet and tiptoed through the quicksand to the dining room table, where he plopped down in a chair.
“Well, Lou, if you’re sure you’d be more comfortable here, rather than next door, shall we get started?”
“Sure, Cy, but where do we start? I was twenty-one when we first started to work on this puzzle, and now I’m retired.”
After some back and forth discussion, we looked at what we had.
EAMC
FIRST
ROO
SLO
“Just as I remember it, Cy.”
“Yeah, me, too, Lou. I was hoping the puzzle fairy had stopped by and filled in the blanks.”
“And we’ve already used our clue for the day. Does that mean we should stop until tomorrow?”
“No, Lou, let’s press on. Surely we can come up with another word before supper. Let’s look at it with the other letters added.”
EAMC
FIRST
LREOO
LLESO
“Lou, I think it helps to look at both of these together.”
“You do?”
“Well, not really, but they say it helps if your teammates think you have confidence in your abilities and theirs. It can’t be too tough. We know that two ‘L’s’ and an ‘E’ go in these two words. One may go in each one, or both go in the same word. Maybe we can get enough to go on so we can come up with another word, and then all we have to do is place those other four letters.”
“None of which we know what they are.”
“Thanks, Lou. I appreciate your contribution. Let’s try them one letter at a time, and see what we get.”
Something was telling me that both “L’s” were not in the same word, so I suggested we try an “L” in the third word.
“Well, which do you like, Lou? ‘Loor,’ ‘Loro,’ ‘Rolo,’ or ‘Rool?”
“Well, whichever one it is, Cy, it takes at least one more letter. Let’s try a letter with each.”
We began with “Loor,” and it wasn’t long before we came up with “Floor.” Then we realized that there wasn’t a book of the Bible that began with “F.” We agreed to tackle the other letters to see if any of them led us anywhere. Fifteen minutes later, we slumped. Defeated again.
There was only one thing to do. I stumbled to my fridge and selected the Hershey Almond bar that I felt would best increase my brain power. I carefully unwrapped my treat, studied it. Each Hershey has a different configuration of almonds. I wasn’t sure that the almonds in that bar were aligned right, so I rewrapped it, returned it to its cold environment, and selected another. Again, I unwrapped a bar, studied it. This time the almonds gave me a different message. The message said, “Pick me up, turn me sideways, and eat the almond in the middle.” Just in case you’re ready to send me to the funny farm, I don’t think the candy spoke to me, but I did feel the urge to turn the candy sideways, instead of eat it the way most people devour a hot dog. Because I gingerly held the candy, I was able to rip a large bite from the side without breaking the bar in two. I had accomplished my mission. I rewrapped my candy. As I savored my delicious treat, I looked up at Lou, who was busy playing Chinese checkers with his M&Ms. Each time he jumped one, he plopped that colorful treat into his mouth.
I sucked on my chocolate until I was afraid that continuing to do so might cause me to swallow the almond and choke on it. Then, I quit and waited for Lou to jump the res
t of his M&Ms.
Something must’ve worked, because shortly after Lou and I finished our eyes wandered from the paper where we’d written down our clues to the slips of paper than had fallen out of the Colonel’s Bible. We saw the paper with the arrow, and almost immediately we knew. There wasn’t a book that started with “F,” but there were plenty that started with “E,” and an arrow inserted there would eventually point two dumb policemen to the next letter of the alphabet.
I remember what I had said earlier about discovering another word before supper, looked at my watch. 3:34. We weren’t used to eating supper that early, but whatever. We came to our senses, realized that it was too early to eat supper. Reluctantly, but at least we realized it.
“Well, Lou, whatever it is we’re looking for is on the first floor of the Colonel’s home. Now all we have to do is figure out what it is and what it has to do with finding out the murderer’s identity. Since no one has a room on the first floor of that house, I doubt if the other two words give us the murderer’s identity. Maybe they will tell us how he or she got into the library. What’s the matter, Lou? You look down.”
“Oh, nothing, Cy. I was just thinking, what if we solve this only to find that it leads us to another puzzle?”
“If so, I’ll crawl to my next-door neighbor’s and die.”
It took a few minutes for it to sink in, but we’d learned something else, other than the third word. We’d learned that the letters “LSEO” were in the fourth word, in some order or another. “Lose” is a word, and so is “Sole.” But “First Floor Lose and “First Floor Sole” didn’t make sense. Besides, we had four more letters that went in either the first or fourth words. More than likely some of them went in each.
We fiddled with letters for the next two hours, got nowhere. Frustrated again, it was time to leave our puzzle to the next day.
+++
I dropped off Lou at his apartment and drove home. Just before turning onto my street, I stopped, donned my night-vision goggles, turned my headlights off, and coasted for home. Just before I got to my house, oncoming headlights blinded me, and almost caused me to hit a tree. I ripped off the goggles, turned on my headlights, and realized that my assailant was my next-door neighbor leaving. The varmint was in her lap, looking out the driver’s-side window. Even when that woman leaves the neighborhood, she creates havoc. I veered into my driveway, pulled to the back, and ran for the back door before the leech could finish her U-turn and catch up with me.
Chapter Eighteen
Saturday morning arrived a little too soon. Unlike some people, Saturday is no different than any other day to a homicide detective in Hilldale. If Lou and I are in the middle of an investigation, we usually work, even on Saturday. Sometimes we sleep a little later on Saturday, because others do, and some of those others frequent the Blue Moon at a later hour than usual. Neither Lou nor I wanted to start our day by throwing someone from our stools. I made a note to ask Rosie if we could put a cage around our stools, a cage where Lou and I had the only keys. Then, I scratched my mental note. I was sure Rosie would have quite a comment about that.
I seldom bothered Sam on Saturday. Besides, Lou and I had enough to keep us busy solving the puzzle. I hoped we’d solve the puzzle by Monday, then, if we still didn’t know the murderer’s identity, we’d begin to question our suspects on Monday.
I stepped into the shower and began to think about our normal Saturday morning routine, the routine we’d miss that day. It felt funny to call it normal, since it had only been our routine for a couple of months. But, for the first three plus months of the year, after we left the Blue Moon full and ready for another day, Lou and I stopped at Scene of the Crime Bookstore to visit with our new friends and select another title or two to devour during the coming week. We’d learned which of the Crime’s customers have the same reading tastes as we do, got suggestions on new titles to read, and discussed books all of us had read. I continued to daydream until I felt the cold water permeating my body. I shivered, then stepped out of the shower and dried my ample body.
+++
I looked up as Lou opened Lightning’s passenger side door. I noticed the look on his face and felt like driving away before he could climb inside. Was it possible my next-door neighbor had sneaked over to his apartment, clawed her way inside, and bitten him? Almost as soon as I thought of that, I dismissed the thought, because if my neighbor had done that, Lou’s mouth would be wearing a scowl and have milky-green saliva dripping from it, rather than be upturned into a smile as it was.
“What happened to you, Lou? Did someone we put behind bars have a change of heart before he died and leave all of his money to you?”
Lou continued to smile, but said nothing.
“You set some new Wii records?”
Again he remained silent.
“You’ve been bitten by the Cheshire cat?”
“It’s a smile, Cy, not a grin.”
“So, you can talk. How about telling me why you’re so happy this morning?”
“Today’s clue, Cy.”
“Okay, out with it, and then maybe both of us can smile.”
“How’d you get to be a lieutenant, anyway?”
“Watch your mouth, lowly Sergeant.”
“Cy, today’s clue is ‘smile.’”
“That’s it. Does it mean we solve the case today? Or possibly when I go home today there’s a ‘For Sale’ sign in my next-door neighbor’s yard? I know, Lou. You only get the messages. You don’t interpret them. Well, smile, you’re on Candid Camera.”
“I loved that show. You, too, Cy?”
“Well, it was funny at times. A lot funnier than this puzzle we’re trying to solve.”
I realized that all our chitchat was keeping us from breakfast, so I unleashed Lightning and lurched forward to the Blue Moon.
No sooner had Lou and I ordered than I realized the significance of that day’s clue. I turned to Lou and smiled. He smiled back. I continued to smile, but Lou’s face returned to normal. I knew he didn’t know, and he didn’t know that I knew.
I was still smiling when Rosie returned with our drinks.
She sat them down and then turned to the good sergeant.
“What’s wrong with him?”
“Well, Rosie, it’s like this. Tomorrow is Sunday. I told them at the home that it’s not a good idea to give Cy a double shot on Saturday, but they wouldn’t listen. Now, look at him.”
“A double shot of what?”
“They won’t tell me. It’s just something special for overworked lieutenants.”
“Well, if you find out, let me know. Some days after work I could use a double shot of something.”
Rosie walked away, and Lou turned to me.
“What’s wrong with you, Cy?”
I merely smiled at him, reached my right forefinger into the air, and pushed it down, like I was clicking a camera. Lou still didn’t get it. He thought I’d lost it. I hadn’t. I’d found it.
+++
As soon as Lou and I were perfectly ensconced in the car, Lou turned to me and asked, “What’s wrong with you, Cy?”
I smiled at him. Seeing that my smile didn’t turn on any lights in his head, I enlightened him.
“Remember the clue this morning?”
“Yeah.”
“Remember the letters in the first word on our puzzle, ‘mace’ or ‘came.’ I almost didn’t get it, because of the way we pronounce, “came,” but I think our first word is “camera.” That uses two of the other letters, and there are books of the Bible that start with ‘R’ and ‘A.’ So, could it be that our first three words are ‘Camera First Floor?’”
“I think you’ve got it, Cy. And it sounds like the last word should be a place in the house, but we’ve named all the rooms.”
“And I don’t think the camera the Colonel referred to is the one outside the library. Anyway, we’ve already checked that camera. There must be another one no one knows about. Let’s try again. Let’s visualize the C
olonel’s house. We enter the house and there’s the hall. We didn’t even mention the hall before, because we don’t think of the hall as a room. Like cabinets, the staircase leading upstairs, the hall closet.”
“That’s it, Cy. Closet. ‘Lose’ with a “C’ before it and a “T” after. Lose and closet don’t sound alike, either. That’s one reason we had trouble coming up with this one. I think we’ve solved the Colonel’s puzzle. There’s a camera in the first floor closet. Now, how many first floor closets does the house have?”
“If I remember correctly, two. One in the living room and one in the hall. My guess is it’s the one in the living room, because that’s one way the Colonel entered the library. Maybe someone else discovered his secret.”
“But remember, Cy. Someone still had to get inside the library. How could someone get in there and kill the Colonel?”
“I’m just hoping that the camera holds a picture of our murderer. It would be devastating for us to find the camera, only to find that the murderer discovered it and removed the film.”
We were almost to my house when we discovered this revelation. I was so happy I tooted Lightning’s horn.
“What’re you doing, Cy? Signaling to your next-door neighbor?”
I craned my neck and made like a periscope to see if I could spot the enemy. She was nowhere to be seen. I pulled into the driveway, sprang from the car, and dashed into the house. It was time to call Louie Palona, Saturday or not.
I called his house, a suspicious male voice answered.
“Good morning, Louie. Did I ever tell you that you’re my favorite gadget man?”
“I am sorry but Louie has gone to Italy for the month. Please feel free to check back with him in June.”
“Good try, Louie. But this is a matter of life or death.”
“Your life and my death, Cy. What’s so urgent that you’re calling me on Saturday?”
“Remember the Colonel’s house. Well, there’s a camera there that might have a picture of the Colonel’s murderer.”
“Cy, I already checked that camera. Remember?”
“No, this is another camera. A hidden camera.”
3 Murder In The Library Page 11