In a moment, the smile was gone. Bowing his head, he closed his eyes and touched his forehead to hers and rolled his head from side to side. Without conscious thought, his face moved down until he could feel the softness of her cheek against him and he stopped there, rubbing his face against hers for a few moments. He moved on, next he touched his nose to hers then he changed sides and started over.
That was all the time it took for him to understand the thought that had nagged at him. She had answered too quickly, she said she understood how much he loved her, but her words had come too quickly. Tonight was about showing her how much he cherished her being in his life. Maybe then the doubt he carried would be alleviated. He recalled her telling him about her parents’ relationship, or lack thereof, and it all made perfect sense to him.
Chapter 29
Breaking contact with her, Jason waited until she opened her eyes and met his gaze. “Do you need to visit your father?”
Aviva was thrown into a state of confusion at the abrupt change in mood. “Visit my father?” she asked, clearly not understanding the meaning behind his words.
“I won’t have the ghost of your parents’ relationship standing between us.”
“I don’t understand what you mean.”
“I think you do. When do you expect me to leave you? Six months…a year…ten years from now. When, Aviva?”
The look of fear seeping into her eyes gave Jason his answer. He knew that with some women, no matter how many times they were assured of their worth, that they were loved above all others, they remained unbelieving. His angel was such a woman; her wide eyed look of dread revealed the truth.
“I…don’t know what you’re talking about.” Aviva made up her mind in a split second to feign ignorance of his meaning.
“Don’t do that. Don’t take me for a fool. I know you, probably better than you know yourself, and I won’t stand for you lying to yourself and me for another moment, do you hear me, Aviva?” Jason told her, giving her a shake to capture her full attention as well as warning her of the seriousness of his words.
Aviva tried to pull away from him, unwilling to be drawn in the direction the conversation was heading. “If you want to pseudo analyze someone, I’m not your girl so get your hands off me so I can get the hell away from you and this ridiculous conversation!”
“Hit a nerve, did I?”
Aviva went still, deadly still. She met Jason’s eyes with a coldness he had never seen her exhibit before and he was sure he wasn’t going to like whatever she was about to say.
“Get away from me!”
“Why, does the truth hurt?”
“You have until the count of five to let me up, after which I’m going to scream this bloody house down.”
Aviva’s voice was so cold, it gave Jason pause. He had never seen her like that and knew he had to get the issue that stood between them out in the open and dealt with. His every instinct told him to keep her exactly where she was. But cold eyes had now changed to a form of desperation that he couldn’t ignore.
“I’ll let you up, but if you try to leave this room, I’ll stop you.”
Aviva didn’t respond although Jason saw her throat work as she swallowed. Removing his weight a little at a time, he broke their physical connection. Springing up from the bed, she made a dash for the door.
Jason knew she was in flight mode from the moment he ask her to face the one issue that remained between them. Moving quickly, he blocked her path.
“All I’m asking is that you trust in what we have, and don’t tell me you do because I know you don’t, or not completely. You are not your mother and I am definitely not that bastard who donated sperm at your conception. Just talk to me…please.” Jason was prepared to do whatever it took. He knew what he wanted and so did she. Now all he had to do was somehow get her to admit it. She had been going through the motions and had nearly convinced him of their longevity.
When the silence stretched on for as long as he could tolerate, Jason spoke again. “Okay, Angel, I’m not about to beg. I freely give you everything I have, everything I am and without reservation. I do this because I love you, I will always love you. But I will accept nothing but the same from you. So if you want to walk out…I won’t stop you.” Saying all he intended, Jason removed his hand from the door and stepped back.
Aviva remained perfectly still as she felt the warmth of Jason’s body move away from her. How was one supposed to react after having been confronted by her deepest fear of Jason someday realizing that she wasn’t enough?
Jason held his breath as he waited for Aviva to fight her internal demon. Just as he was about to give up, she spoke.
“This thing between us…”
Jason cut her off before she could finish whatever she was about to say. “It’s not a thing, Angel. It’s called love. I love you and I know you feel the same. But I’m a greedy man and I want it all.”
“So do I, Jason. More than you know. But suppose it doesn’t work out. Suppose at some point I’m not enough for you?”
“Not gonna happen.”
“How can you say that? Look at your lifestyle, what you’ve accomplished. Sometimes I stand in awe of where you could end up if you put your mind to it.”
“I’m where I want to be. Where I will always want to be…with you.”
“You’re not hearing me!”
“I hear you. You’re not hearing me.”
Jason’s words were met with silence and he racked his brain for something more to say that would finally convince her of how much he needed her in his life. Then he spoke.
“‘Grow old along with me!
The best is yet to be,
The last of life, for which the first was made:
Our times are in His hand who saith, ‘A whole I planned,
Youth shows but half, Trust God: See all, nor be afraid!’”
Browning. He was quoting Browning. This big, naked wonderful man was quoting Robert Browning to little Aviva Johnson from south London. “Oh, Jason.”
“Do you understand, my Angel? Please tell me you do. You are my only love and I promise that I will love you more each and every day that I am blessed with breath. But I want it all, Angel…I must have it all.”
Her mind was made up. Never again would she allow the shackles of her parents’ lives to be a determining factor of her own. She had the best of men and she was keeping him. What the hell had she been thinking?
Turning slowly, deliberately, from the door, Aviva faced Jason, her eyes alight with devilment. “Oh, you’ve gone and done it now…quoting Browning to me with your sexy ass self.”
“Did it work?”
“Affirmative.”
“What else?”
“You are never getting away from me until I draw my last breath, Jason Kingdom, and I’m about to lay it on you so fine I’m gonna make you sing soprano,” Aviva told him as she took a dive through the air in no doubt that he would catch her. And he did.
Pulling her close to his body, Aviva wrapped her legs around his waist, closed her eyes and threw her head back, laughing with happiness as Jason spun her around in circles.
Jason came to a stop beside the bed and stood, waiting for Aviva to open her eyes. When she did, he spoke to her in an even lower tone than she was used to hearing, his chest rumbling with each word he spoke. “You have that wrong, Angel. The rest of the night is all about you. It’s been nearly two weeks since I last made love to my angel and I intend to make you feel…good.”
Aviva couldn’t think of a comeback if her life depended on it and the look in his eyes said it all.
Taking hold of her legs, Jason unwrapped them from around his body, never breaking eye contact, his passion filled orbs screamed with anticipation of what was to come. She was watching him with such intensity, Jason smiled as he had to pull her arms from around his neck she held on so tight. Bending his knees, he scooped her up and deposited her in the middle of the big bed. Then he stood perfectly still and watched
her, his eyes moving up and down her body in a slow perusal.
“Take it off.”
“Take it off?”
“Yes, Angel, take off that shirt. I want to see you…all of you.”
“Oh, okay.” Rising to her knees, Aviva’s hand reached towards the button of his shirt, fingers trembling so much she had difficulty maneuvering them through their openings.
“I could do with a little help here.”
“No…I want you to do it. I promise this is the last bit of work you’ll have to do for the rest of the night.”
Aviva licked her lips in anticipation of his words…no, his promise. Her fingers fumbled. She internally cursed whichever fool had invented buttons. What was wrong with Velcro? That way she could just rip this sucker apart! But as his eyes followed her every move, she changed her mind. Her man was loving the moment by moment reveal. Just like that, her fingers became sure. Slowing down even more, Aviva bent her head and undid another button. As it came undone, she peeped up at Jason to see his reaction. His eyes were glued to her hands so she stilled her fingers and waited. His eyes sprung up at her lack of movement. Giving him a small smile, Aviva ran her tongue across her bottom lip and pulled it between her teeth. She had his full attention.
Running her eyes down his body, she saw that he was only at half-mast. Oh no, she thought to herself, that would not do. Slipping her hand inside the opening she had just created, Aviva ran her fingers along her collar bones until they disappeared between the folds of the shirt…his eyes followed as though drawn by a magnetic force.
Cupping the full breasts he loved so much, she pushed them up and rubbed her open palms over them. Knowing he was watching her every move only heightened her arousal and she was unable to withhold a groan.
At the sound, Jason’s eyes flashed back to her face but she wasn’t looking at him. Her eyes were closed and he wanted to know what she was thinking.
If Jason could read minds, he would have known that she was envisioning it was his big strong hand running over the sensitive tips of her breast. Cupping them, pushing them up, and kneading until they formed sensitive globes, ready for him, only for him.
One last button, Aviva thought, and then he had a promise to keep.
“Do it…now!”
By the tone of his voice, he was impatient. Aviva knew her time was up. She wanted this man as much as he wanted her. Taking one last look at him, she could see that he was now almost at full mast. Wasting no more time, she released the last button and rotated her shoulders to allow the shirt to fall down her arms.
Having enjoyed the show, Jason moved. In a flash, he was upon her, trapping the shirt midway down her arms and growing serious. “You like teasing with me, don’t you, Angel? Well, now it’s my time to play. Are you ready for me? All of me? Nothing held back…umm silence…I want you, need you, more than I have ever wanted or needed another woman, and you’re going to take me. You’re going to satisfy me…but it may take a while,” Jason told, her fastening his mouth against hers, devouring every inch, his tongue trust forward, moving with slow deep deliberation, taking what he wanted, demanding her response.
Wresting her mouth from his, Aviva goaded him. “Show me what you’ve got. I don’t want the words, I want action. Come on, show me…I can take it…show it now!”
Jason flipped a hand and she was on her back. She wanted him, all of him…well, she was going to get him. But first, he would show her just what she meant to him. He was about to ignore her ploy at making him lose control. First, he was going to show her that her pleasure was his alone to give. Then, and only then, was he going to demonstrate that she was his need, his want, his reason for living.
With her hands still enclosed in the sleeves of his shirt and trapped behind her, Jason had full control. She wanted to see what he had? Well, he would gladly show her but he intended to do it without words. Dipping his head, he ran his tongue over the tip of one breast, over and over again, her body arched demanding more, demanding attention for the one that was being neglected. But he ignored her silent plea. This was his night, his perfect opportunity to show his angel what she meant to him and he would not be rushed, one step at a time. By the end of the night, she would have no doubts that only he could meet her needs, fully completely…because he loved her. Jason relinquished coherent thought and all that was left was sensual feeling. He vowed that not another word would pass his lips until every fiber of his angel’s being knew a love like theirs didn’t happen by accident. He had given her the words, now it was time to give her his touch, his caress, his body.
Moving his mouth to her other breast, he gave her what she wanted. The feel of his mouth against her neglected nipple, pulling, sucking and pulling some more against the swell. Gauging her reaction to his touch, Jason was determined to become everything her conscious or subconscious mind had ever wanted in her man.
He knew his woman, understood her psyche, her needs, and tonight he was going to ensure that he left her wanting for nothing. He knew she loved the way he looked, the way he felt. He felt the same way. But it was his promise to them both to show her that what was between them was so much more than just the physical…what was between them was eternal.
Deciding that his first quest would be on her magnificent breasts, Jason continued his attention, pulling, sucking, and rotating her nipple until he could feel her change. He marveled at the fact that just his mouth on her breasts could cause such a reaction. He had no doubt this woman was his and he would spend the rest of his life making sure that she always responded to him as she was doing at this moment.
True to his word, he remained silent, focusing his attention on giving her pleasure but this was only the beginning. There was more…so much more for him to give and for them both to feel. Moving down her body, Jason placed butterfly soft kisses as well as nips and licks as he moved ever closer to his goal Spreading her firm thighs even further apart, he looked down at what was his and his alone for the rest of their lives.
Jason was transfixed at the bounty laid out before him. So caught up was he in the moment, he licked his lips in anticipation of his first taste. It had been too long since he had his angel spread out before him. Dipping his head, he ran his tongue along her semi open folds from top to bottom. Using only his mouth, he went deeper and deeper, reacquainting himself with her taste, and he ate as though he were a starving man at a feast. Flicking his tongue back and forth across the bud of her pleasure, Jason heard her groan. The sound caused him to grow even harder while at the same time wondering how much longer he was going to be able to hold out from burying himself inside her. This was supposed to be her night, him catering to her needs but he wasn’t sure if he would be able to carry out his plan. How this woman always managed to pull him to the edge without even touching him was something he had yet to fathom.
Pushing all thought from his mind, Jason fixed his attention on giving her what she needed. Lifting her legs, he placed them over his shoulders and rose up on his knees. Having her exactly where he wanted her, he went to work in earnest as his mouth and tongue licked and stroked and plunged, making patterns just for her pleasure. Then he latched on her clitoris and sucked, ensuring she felt the roughness of his tongue with every pull.
Aviva began to writhe against his face, one moment pressing forward then pulling away the next. Jason knew she always did this when she was close so he held her even firmer to keep her exactly where she was.
“Jason…Jason…Jason” Aviva called his name, each time growing louder and louder.
“Shhhhh.” The sound was deliberate, drawn out, meant to vibrate against her clitoris to send sensations through her, to constrict her mind, leaving no room for anything other than…feeling. The sucking in of her breath and the heavy pulsing he could feel against his mouth was the trigger he had been waiting for. That feeling couldn’t be controlled. She was there, his angel was right where he wanted her to be, she was coming…hard.
It had only been a short while but Aviva had for
gotten just how this man could make her feel. As wave after wave of delicious sensation hit her body, she somehow managed to withhold her scream of pleasure by biting down on her bottom lip as every cell in her body tingled with awareness.
Satisfied with the way things were going, Jason’s mind turned to how he would have her next. Kissing the inside of each of her thighs, he lowered her legs to the bed. Still between her legs, he brought his chest down and made contact with her belly as he pulled himself upwards.
Aviva closed her eyes and gloried in the feel of the dusting of fine hairs on his broad chest as they made contact with her sensitized skin. Arching her back, she rubbed her breasts against him, loving the feel of his weight as it pressed her into the softness of the bed.
Opening her eyes, Aviva saw that he was watching her. His eyes were black and intense and her breathing sped up. She knew what it meant when Jason got this way.
Jason had started off wanting their loving to be a gentle affair. But now knew that he was way past the gentle stage. He was unsure when it had happened but something had switched in him in the space of a heartbeat.
“Are you ready for me?” Jason asked as he pushed himself up onto his knees and straddled her body.
“Oh my, I should bloody well say so,” Aviva responded looking down at his jutting erection that looked so hard she wondered if it were painful. “Need some help with that?” she asked with a toss of her head.
Jason looked down at his rock hard shaft and then ran his eyes back up her body before again making eye contact, though still unmoving.
“Jason?”
Taking her by the waist, Jason pulled her up and removed the shirt that still held her hands captive. As quick as a flash, a hand shot out, reaching for him.
Jason caught it in midair. “Do not touch it!” he hissed through his gritted teeth.
For Love and Vengeance Page 24