by Audra Red
The first time he’d noticed anything unusual was after a particularly rough footie practice. He'd been an extremely active young man, so full of energy and impatience. He’d run around all day in tight shoes, kicking and tripping.
When he’d gotten home that night, odd blisters were on the heels of his feet. His mother had noticed the blisters, of course, but hadn’t thought much of it. Alexander was an energetic boy, of course he’d get a few bumps and scrapes. After all, Alexander had always had rather sensitive skin, so it wasn’t too unusual that he’d blister.
As the days went by, the blisters increased, so much so that Alexander had difficulty walking. A visit to the doctor was useless, as the physician only suggested less rough play. Blisters were a common thing among active children.
So, Alexander missed a week of practice. And then he’d missed two, then three and the blisters only worsened.
Alexander missed school the day he’d woken up with lesions on his fingers. He couldn’t write or grasp anything, the blisters were so sore. It was then that his mother Natalie began to worry.
She'd taken Alexander to another doctor and the diagnosis was life altering. Alexander had a rare skin disease called Epidermolysis Bullosa Simplex, a disease that he’d most likely have to live with his entire life. Strangely enough, the disease was usually inherited from a parent, but neither Natalie or her late husband had any symptoms of EB. What was worse, the doctor had no hope for a cure. Luckily, Alex was diagnosed with a very mild subtype of the disease called Weber-Cockayne. Yet, even with this mild form, Alexander still experienced painful blistering and had to bandage his hands, something most people with the subtype didn’t have to do.
Though the disease was painful, it wasn’t life threatening like some of the other forms and there was a chance that the symptoms of the disease would improve as he grew older. But Alexander’s life still changed. School became a burden and Alexander was affected more by the isolation from his peers than by the pain. The blisters were manageable, but Alexander drew away from his classmates and friends.
Every doctor they visited came to the same conclusion; there would be no cure.
Desperate for her son to live a normal life, Natalie said goodbye to their family and friends and moved to Massachusetts. With much research under her belt, she knew some of the best physicians in the world could be found in New York, as well as DebRA, a nonprofit organization that supported those with EB.
Alexander was able to meet with others who had EB through DebRA, and while he was a bit shy of the children he met, he felt that he’d finally found a place to fit in.
While there was still no cure to be found, Alexander’s doctors were optimistic, and had treated other patients with EB before. They’d prescribed medication to ease the pain and taught Alexander and Natalie how to wrap his hands if the blisters became unmanageable.
In a way, the wrapping had allowed Alexander to live a semi-normal life, though his mother home schooled him. He was still involved with other children, as well. Natalie would send him to the library every day, and thus began his passion for books.
Alexander had become a quiet, withdrawn child with much patience. He needed patience to survive. Everything became slow and methodical. He’d listened to everything his mother had said, though her care could be almost overwhelming at times. As Alexander grew older, he’d had to wrap his hands and feet less and less. He’d gone to college for a year before the stress was too much for him to take, physically and mentally.
Now, living on his own in New York, he couldn’t seem to keep his EB under control anymore. He was back to wrapping and the pain became distracting.
Alexander sighed heavily, breaching the surface of his reverie as he unwound the last strip of gauze from his hand. The cloth clung, releasing with a stinging burn.
He looked at his right hand, frowning at the abused, red skin. Months ago, his hands hadn’t been half as irritated as they were now. The blame could only be placed on himself, as he was keen on pushing his boundaries further and further.
That evening seemed to be the pinnacle of his daring. What a coward he’d been, he knew it.
He hadn’t a clue that Daniel was left with the polar opposite impression of him.
Alexander pushed all thoughts of the evening from his mind, walking carefully to the filled tub on his bare feet. He didn’t even test the water, just slipped in with a low, satisfied moan.
The water was brutally hot, but he found that the heat seemed to work the aches right out of his insides, to the very core of his being.
But some aches couldn’t be healed.
He sank in deep, the water to his chin. Every inch of his skin burned for a few long moments before he adjusted to the new temperature. Immediately, Alexander felt the hot water work the tension from his back. Only then did he relax, letting his eyes drift shut and the pleasant feel of the water surround him.
He soaked his feet for a while before straightening his legs out and propping his heels up at the head of the tub. His hands rested comfortable on his belly, one gently atop the other.
This was a well-known routine. He’d doze until the water became tepid and then quickly wash his body and hair. This was done hastily not only because the lukewarm water was uncomfortable, but also to avoid unneeded stimulus to the water softened skin on his hands.
But tonight was different. He was too tense to doze, though his body was extremely relaxed. It was his mind that refused to shut down.
Thoughts of his evening could not be drowned.
Worse than just the thoughts were the feelings. Much to his chagrin, raw excitement still lingered in his belly, and his nakedness didn't help the situation. It had been an upsetting evening, far from perfect.
Why were goose bumps tingling all along his arms? Alexander’s eyes eased open then, looking down his lean torso. He was very displeased to find himself physically aroused. His eyes followed the smooth plane of his stomach, down his thighs, and then to the small tuffs of curls between them.
His entire body flushed, hotter feelings awakening than the water could entice. Alexander wasn’t a prude, really, just nearly incapable of dealing with the physical side of his feelings.
He had been attracted to certain individuals before, and had admittedly been aroused, even sometimes to the extent of embarrassed aching. He knew that it was natural for him to feel that way.
Though he often found himself uncomfortable and frustrated, he could accept his sexuality and the affects it had on his body.
But not now, not with Daniel.
Daniel was different; Alexander liked him. He was interested in the man. It was something he couldn’t deny.
Daniel had surprised him.
Alexander didn’t know what he'd expected from Daniel, but he knew that he didn’t exactly have the right to harbor any expectations. Daniel hadn’t overreacted to Alexander’s overreactions, and nor had he distanced himself from the situation. He’d been there for Alexander.
'A calming presence,' Alexander thought, sinking in deeper. He scowled, trying to shake the thoughts away, but he couldn’t lead his mind elsewhere.
Daniel would want to touch him.
If they were close in an intimate way, Daniel would want to kiss him. Daniel would be gentle and sure and sweet, Alexander knew.
And cocky, Daniel would be horrible and pushy and overbearing. He would be sure, sure that he knew what was best for Alexander, and too gentle, fearing to break him. His sweetness would shift to coddling and condescending words.
Alexander would become weak and slight beneath him.
But Daniel had already touched him, and those soft touches alone were enough to send Alexander reeling. This wasn’t a safe fantasy.
Alexander let out a soft sigh as the tightening in his groin continued. His cock rose stiffly, rosy and wet in the warm water. Warily, he pressed a tender palm to the hardening length, just holding.
What he wanted was more, much more, but it wasn’t something he could gi
ve himself. He shifted his legs closer together, applying more delicious pressure, his slim, long thighs brushing the base of his cock.
He thought of Daniel.
Just his smile, and the way he talked low. He no longer thought of the worries, or the future, only allowed the sweetness through. Lips parting on a soft moan, he held himself tighter. The wanting overtook him, and his breath came out in stifled little pants between his lips. His eyes slipped shut, and the blackness filled him with intense longing.
He’d never really been kissed. Would Daniel mind?
His hips eased up, water sliding down his sides. Groaning hoarsely, he relinquished the gentle hold on his cock, denying it the friction he craved, the burn of arousal becoming too intense. Often, he wondered how a strong, certain hand would feel on his body.
Alexander’s stomach muscles trembled at that point, his cock maddeningly hard. Excitement coursed over his skin, every part of his body, sensitive and wet.
Daniel had touched him with care, on his neck and arms…
Would Daniel want him like this?
Alexander remembered Daniel’s eyes.
Yes, the man wanted him.
“Fuck,” Alexander hissed out, forcing himself to sit up. He stared blankly at the wall, biting his lip. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
It had been a confusing, wonderful, horrible evening.
And it would be an even longer night.
***
“Tell Elizabeth that her reading group at noon is canceled,” Elijah said flatly. He propped his feet up on a small child’s chair that he’d dragged in from the reading room.
Alexander looked up from the computer screen, and scowled. “She’s sitting two feet from you, tell her yourself.” Alexander sent Elizabeth a withering glance, but she was busy studying her nails.
“Elijah, I’ve never had a reading group at noon,” Elizabeth replied flatly, tossing her hair back and standing. “David always has the noon reading groups on Saturday. You know that, you made the schedule. So stop being such an ass.”
Elijah tipped his head to the side and looked at Alexander seriously. “You can tell Elizabeth that I changed the schedule just last week, and if she doesn’t want to keep track of--”
“If you changed it, you didn’t post it in the break room,” Elizabeth remarked sourly. “And if you didn’t post it in the break room then--”
“Elizabeth would be pleased to note that the schedules are posted, and have been for the past month, in the coat room!” Elijah said angrily, standing to meet Elizabeth’s angry gaze.
“Why would you post them in the coat room?”
“Alexander, explain to Elizabeth that they’re posted in the coat room because--”
The verbal battle continued back and forth between Elizabeth and Elijah for what seemed like a small eternity. Alexander felt like his head would pop.
His mood was down to begin with, and now with the added stress of his two best friends fighting, he thought he might lose his mind. Alexander sat between them, eyes staring past the computer screen, trying to mute out their shouting match.
They’d been at it all morning, and, unlike David, he hadn’t been able to sneak away from them. He was working on the new catalog with Elizabeth, though Alexander seemed to be doing most of the work.
Or rather, all of it.
Elizabeth had made a few suggestions earlier that morning on the new system, mostly to do with Elijah’s incompetence at picking a compatible program and his obvious uselessness at organizing anything other than his comic book collection.
That one had hit home, Alexander knew.
“Alexander, tell Elizabeth that if she wants to get into my personal life… that she shouldn’t!” Elijah shouted directly at Elizabeth.
“When you kiss me, your personal life becomes mine!” Elizabeth retorted, and Alexander sighed.
Alexander was sure the argument would last well into the afternoon before Elijah broke down like a small child and begged for forgiveness. Elizabeth seemed to have that effect on men.
So much so, that Elijah had been entirely too caught up with Elizabeth to even remember what had gotten him in the argument with her in the first place.
The bathroom.
Daniel.
They hadn’t said a word to Alexander about his date, and while he enjoyed the mini holiday from their prying ways, he also felt a bit put out. It wasn’t that he wanted to talk about Daniel, really.
No, no, it wasn’t that at all.
It wasn’t like he’d spent an entire evening nursing a rather intolerable ache for the older man, either.
Completely untrue, it had lasted until the morning hours.
He just wanted them to ask about the date, so he could politely request that they not. Alexander frowned again, watching Elizabeth make vulgar hand gestures at Elijah.
And then the bell at the front door rang.
“I’ll get that,” Alexander mumbled, quickly exiting the room. Neither Elijah nor Elizabeth noticed his departure, something Alexander found quite relieving. 'Thank God,' he thought.
David was greeting someone at the door, and Alexander walked by, intent on straightening out the adult fiction section.
But he stopped dead in his tracks as David stepped aside.
“There he is,” David said merrily, turning to Alexander.
Alexander gaped. “What are you doing here?”
Chapter Nine
back to top
“What do you mean?”
Alexander sighed heavily. “Mum, you could have called first.”
“I don’t see what’s so bad about a mother driving all the way into New York to visit her son for a few days. You haven’t been returning my calls dear, and I worry,” Natalie Price said, unwinding the large scarf she had wrapped about her head. She removed a pair of leather gloves and folded them neatly into her jacket pocket.
“But, Mum…” Alexander said softly, his words faltering as Natalie placed a warm hand on his shoulder. “Mum.”
“I thought it was rather sweet of me,” she cooed. “What do you think David? It is David, correct?”
“Yes,” David said, looking at Alexander with an awkward expression on his face. “And uh, yes, yes Ma’am.”
“Oh, call me Natalie, dearie,” she said sweetly. “Just look at you, Alexander. Darling, you look pale.”
“Mum, I’m fine,” Alexander protested, feeling his face redden. Natalie made a frustrated huffing noise in response and pushed Alexander’s hair back from his face, feeling his forehead with her palm.
“Doesn’t he look pale?” she asked, not looking to David for the answer. “And you’ve lost weight since I last visited. I tell you, I’m not getting any younger, and my own son won't even take a few days out of his busy schedule to come visit his mother. I have to make the trip. The drive here is treacherous, simply unpleasant.”
“Mum,” Alexander whined, clenching his hands together involuntarily. He regretted the move immediately, as a soft hiss of pain left his mouth and his mother’s eyes shot open, wide and concerned. “It’s nothing,” Alexander said, shrugging her hands away.
“Oh, it’s always something with you,” she said, a short chuckle escaping her tightly pouted lips. Mrs. Price was nothing if not a social animal, dressed immaculately with not a hair out of place. She wasn’t a wealthy woman, she never had been, but no matter what, she always looked put together. Alexander had clear memories of her meticulously curling her hair and applying her makeup before begging the landlord for an extension on the rent.