by Ruby Vincent
“That’s not it—”
“Silence!”
I shrunk in the seat, heart galloping in my chest. Dad raised his hand and my arms flew up, shielding my face.
A soft touch brushed away the hair sticking to my damp forehead. “You’ve driven us to this, Belle. Know that we did not want to go this route, but you’ve left us no option.”
“Tobias,” Mom breathed. “It hasn’t come to that.”
“It has.” The gentle touch disappeared.
I slowly dropped my hands, taking in Dad’s grim expression and Mom’s regret. I didn’t understand these looks on their faces, but that we were out of sync was obvious. For a terrible moment, I actually believed my father would hit me. Before this year, the thought would never cross my mind.
“What has?” I asked. “What option?”
Straightening, Dad drew Mother to his side, wrapping his arm around her. Two against one.
“Belle, you will go to the cove, participate and complete all tasks given to you, and at the end, choose a husband. If you don’t, you’ll be cut off.”
I froze. The words swirled around my head, knocking on my skull to penetrate and sink the horrid truth in.
No. This isn’t happening.
“I’m afraid it is.”
I hadn’t realized I’d spoken out loud.
“If you do not leave Friday morning with the commitment to honor and obey us, then you should have no expectation of living off our money. We will not pay for college. Your bank accounts will be drained. Your car sold and”—Dad held Mom tighter as a sob leaked out of her—“you will no longer be welcome in our home.”
Dad emptied his quiver, notching each arrow of my life, home, and security, and using them to rip through my heart. I was crying—thick, hot rivulets falling faster than Mom.
My voice shook though I tried not to. “D-Daddy, please. You can’t kick me out with n-nothing. If you do... he’ll find me.”
A flicker crossed his face, gone just as quickly as it came. “That will not happen, Belle, because you’ll do as we say. Go to the cove. Make a good match who’ll be there for you after we’re gone. Do this and we won’t have to speak of this again.”
“Won’t speak of this again?” I pushed myself up on legs that shook. “You’re holding my life and future hostage. This isn’t something we can sweep under the rug. It’s not something we can ever come back from... and you know that. Nothing will be the same between us.”
His face remained impassive. “Dispense with the dramatics, Belle. One day, when you’re a parent, you’ll understand that everything we do is for your life, future, and happiness.”
“Mom, tell him—”
“Your father and I are united on this.” Tears dug tracks in her makeup, dripping it onto her shawl. “The lawyers have already been contacted. You agree or you will be cut off.”
“Agree to what?! Get married? What if no one wants to marry me after my embarrassing display? Do I come home to my stuff in trash bags on the front lawn, and leave to count the days until he finds me?”
Dad reached for me, likely to brush my hair in the way that always soothed me. I flung myself away and the gentle moment passed. Before my eyes, Dad hardened.
“You underestimate yourself, Belle, and what you have to offer. You’re a bright, talented young lady. There will be no shortage of potential fiancés and we expect you to consider each one and choose the man you can see a life with. That is all we’ve ever asked, but you’re determined to sabotage this opportunity out of sheer spite. Now you know the consequences if that continues.
“If at the conclusion of the summer no one proposes, then of course, we will not kick you out. You’ll simply try again in another three years. Understood?”
A thousand replies sprang to my lips. Pleas. Curses. Promises. Rationalizations. Anything and everything I could think of to change my father’s mind.
I let them fade away unsaid. I could appeal to my father, but not to the stranger in front of me. This man I didn’t know.
“All right, Tobias.” I wiped my face with the back of my hand, flicking my tears on the carpet like so much annoyances. “You win.”
“Belle,” Mom began.
“Don’t bother, Cecilia.” I turned my back on them, striding toward the door. “I leave this Friday. I better start packing.”
They let me shut them in without another word.
My tears slowed to nothing. The cottony fog in my head dissipated.
You did well playing the hard-ass, Tobias, but you shouldn’t have eased up at the finish line.
I go to the cove, participate in their silly games, and if I don’t get a proposal at the end of it, my life and inheritance remain intact.
A smile curled my lips.
No one is coming within ten feet of me, let alone proposing at the end of this summer. I will raze that island to the ground and watch it sink into the sea. Once I’m through, Mrs. Desai’s ninety-five-year tradition won’t survive to see ninety-eight.
NATHAN
“Are you all right, sir?”
I shot my chauffeur a blank look. He motioned to my face.
“Oh, this?” I touched my busted lip. “What’s a punch between friends? Preston’s about to sink deep into withdrawal. I know the feeling.”
Concern wrinkled his brow.
This is my life. Even the staff pities me.
“Would you like me to fetch ice for you, sir?”
“Leave it.” I waved my hand for him to open the door. “Stop calling me ‘sir’ while you’re at it, Abe. You know you only do that around the colonel.”
Abe flicked over my shoulder. “Many of his friends are here, sir. We shouldn’t risk it.”
“No. Can’t have anyone else treat me like I’m human while he’s determined to scrape me off like shit on his shoe.”
Abraham wisely said nothing. Speaking ill of his boss with eyes and ears everywhere was even stupider than calling me by my name.
“Then let’s get the fuck out of here.”
“Where to, sir?” he asked as I slid inside.
“Home.”
He paused in closing the door. “Home?”
The tone of surprise was warranted. I made it my divine and splendid mission to overstay my welcome in as many girls’ beds as possible. All to avoid going home to my own.
“Have to,” I said simply. “Mom wants to see me.”
“Of course, sir. We’ll be there in twenty minutes.”
Twenty minutes.
That’s how much time I had to distract myself. Twenty minutes in my world of pretend until stepping through those doors ripped it away.
Taking out my phone, I scrolled past Abby, Adette, Alex, Bailey, and Becky. Those five were always down to send me nudes and I’d amassed a tasty collection of them already. But my newest hookup, Chana, had an impressive collection of dildos stashed in her closet and she wasn’t through showing me all she could do with them.
What better way to kill twenty minutes than a back-seat tug?
I slid my thumb up, looking for her name, and stopped, landing on five letters strung together in perfect irony.
Belle
Belle Adler. The bell I couldn’t unring. A mistake I couldn’t undo. The girl neither drinks, drugs, and anonymous fucks could erase from my mind nor delete from my phone.
The small voice in the back of my head sounded the alarm. Warned me not to let that beautiful force of destruction back in. The wreckage she left behind at the reception and the damage to my and Preston’s friendship wasn’t even her at full strength. If she put her mind to it, she’d reduce us all to the crumbles of dust she left me in two years ago.
That’s why you’re finally going to delete her. What kind of idiot are you saving her texts in the first place? Close the door on Belle Adler. Once and for all.
I tapped her name.
Thousands of texts scrolled down my screen, chronicling the time of Belle Adler and Nathan Prince.
Belle: Wha
t time will you get here? I need you inside of me like I need apple cinnamon ice cream and peanut butter sauce.
Nathan: Am I reduced to a sinful treat?
Belle: You’re so much more than that. But if you’ve got a problem with sinful treats, you won’t want to eat them off me tonight.
Nathan: Whoa. Pull back. Let’s not get hasty.
Belle’s response was a string of laugh emojis. When I received them then, they made me desperate to hear her laugh for real. They had the same effect on me the millionth time.
My grip tightened. Stop doing this to yourself. Turn off the fucking phone!
I read on.
Belle: Why is he so awful to you? Refusing to let you join them in Florida. It’s just cruel.
Nathan: The colonel has a special kind of hatred for me that can only be held for family. I wake up every day wondering how that fuck fathered my mother. They couldn’t be more different.
Belle: I know what that’s like.
Nathan: For two seconds, I was pissed about the colonel exiling me to Bracknell. Then you walked down my beach. It’ll shave ten years off the bastard’s life to find out he did me a favor. Can’t wait to see the look on his face when I tell him this has been the best summer of my life.
Belle: He won’t let you come back next summer if you do. You’ll have to choose between another three months making love to me on the beach or the satisfaction of sticking it to him.
Nathan: Not going to lie, it’s a tough one, but I choose you. Damn. I really am into you.
Belle: More than into me. You love me, Nathan. Might as well say it ’cause we both know it’s true.
Nathan: I’ll tell you anything you want to hear when you come over tonight.
I squeezed my eyes shut. If I was too weak to move my thumb to delete. At least I didn’t have to torture myself reading anymore.
Belle dragged me into her sea, held me under till my lungs screamed, and then wrung out my time, love, and secrets until there was nothing left. She had the cheek to call pretty boys sirens, but the truth was, she sucked us into her cyclone, and when we were determined unworthy, we were spat out and left to die.
I gave Belle everything she asked of me, but she looked at me that night like I was the one who betrayed her.
“Nathan?”
I snapped my head up.
“We’re here.”
Chuckling with no real mirth, I stuffed my phone in my pocket. Torturing myself with thoughts of Belle. That’s one way to pass the time.
I didn’t reach for the knob right away. “How’s she been?”
“Good. Strong,” Abraham replied. “She misses you.”
“I’m getting her out of here, Abe. I promised her and I’ll do it even if she doesn’t hold me to it.”
“I’ve never doubted you would, Nathan.”
Clearing my throat, I said, “Go home, man. Kiss Renata. Watch that movie that’s been sitting on your queue for weeks. Get far away from this funhouse of horrors.”
“Goodnight, Nathan.”
Yeah, there it is for sure. Pity.
I climbed out of the car and stood before the glory of Steele Manor. Sixteen bedrooms, three kitchens, two drawing rooms, a basement, an attic, a billiards room, and a pool house all sitting on twelve acres of slightly sloping hills. The biggest mansion on this block, and there wasn’t enough room to hold me and him.
The entryway was cloaked in darkness. The staff left the lights on until the colonel retired for the night.
Ironic that in this case darkness is a good thing when dealing with the devil.
The colonel was safely in bed, and I could be with Mom in peace.
I rounded the staircase for the living quarters at the back. My mother had been moved to the first floor months ago to spare her climbing up and down the stairs every day. Her new room was no less a shrine to her comfort and achievements.
Awards for math and science stretching back to her first elementary science fair. Photos of her shaking hands with dignitaries and revolutionaries. And all the pictures there were in the house of me, my father, and the three of us together. The story of her life plastered on too-white walls.
I cringed at them like I did every time I stepped into Mom’s room. The first thing I’d do in our new house is paint her room yellow. Her favorite color.
A dainty figure in white sat at the vanity, running a brush through her chestnut curls. “Nathan,” she said, clear as a bell.
Bell.
Don’t go there.
“Come here. Give me a hug.”
I knelt beside my mother, wrapping her up and pressing my face on her stomach. Lavender detergent filled my nose, tickling me to sneeze. I just held her tighter.
“You’ll squeeze out all of my stuffing at this rate.” She laughed. “What’s wrong, love?”
“Wouldn’t it be quicker to ask what’s right?”
“Okay. What’s right?”
I dropped my head on her lap, settling in to fall asleep there if I had to. “Nothing. See? Quicker.”
“How can that be true? You’re young, handsome, and healthy. You have a mom that loves you and friends who are there for you. You got accepted into your first, second, and third choice colleges.”
She smacked my forehead.
“Hey,” I cried.
“You have a lot of things going right for you, Bug, and you better stop forgetting it.” Her stern tap, tap, tap on my head morphed into a gentle stroke through my curls. “Life is a collection of experiences, Nathan. The nature-versus-nurture debate can go on forever, but the truth is, we’re the sum of the things we’ve seen, the people we’ve met, and the chances we’ve taken.
“We can choose to shape our lives around the bad experiences. Be plagued by bitterness from people who’ve wronged us or filled with regret by the opportunities we let slip past. Or—”
“—we can hold on to the good,” I finished, “because at the end, we’ll wish we spent more time cherishing those great times and creating more of them. I know, Mom.”
“Of course, you do.” She kissed my temple. “Because a very smart woman told you so.”
“I wish it was that easy. You can try to paint a smile on and pretend all is good, but the devil plays favorites, and he’s taking a particular liking to fucking up my life.”
“So, fight back.”
I tilted my head up, smiling at her. “I know better than to argue with you.”
“You do. Because going up against me is one fight you’ll never win, Bug.”
“Tell me about it. Still can’t get you to stop calling me Bug. Why couldn’t your only child have been given a better nickname? Are you holding something against me? Did I kick you too much in the womb?”
Mom’s laugh banished the last traces of my bad mood.
“Actually, you tap-danced on my bladder every second of every day. Your dad joked about turning the bathtub into my bed and being done with it.”
“You remember that?” I whispered.
She cocked her head. “Of course I do, Bug. I also remember that a certain son of mine wanted to be carried everywhere. I couldn’t put you down for five minutes without you crying for me. Even as you got older, you’d run into my arms at the first sight of me. My little cuddle bug.”
A wistful grin came over her like she could picture it all right now, and I took a mental picture, capturing the sight and locking it away under good moments.
I hummed. “So Bug is a constant reminder to me that I was an unrepentant momma’s boy.”
“Still are, my love.”
“I’d deny it,” I said, laughing. “But the evidence holds up.”
“This summer, if you choose a girl who loves you even a fraction of how much I do, then you’ll be in for a lifetime of all the things that’s right.”
I drifted up to the photo on her vanity. A young, happy couple screwed up their faces at the camera, heads together and over a little curly-headed, smooshed-face baby making a face for a different reason. Wheneve
r I looked at them together, I envisioned a deity throwing their traits into a blender, mixing them up, and then pouring out a big bowl of me.
Mom’s hair color, but Dad’s curls. Mom’s almond-shaped eyes, but Dad’s dark-brown orbs looking out from them. Her heart-shaped lips, but his grin. I was the perfect mix of this couple down to the light brown skin that fell neatly between them both. The only thing I didn’t get from them were the freckles. Those were all mine.
“You didn’t get a lifetime, Mom. Why should I?”
“But I did, Nathan.” She cupped my jaw, stroking my cheeks. “You and your father have gifted me happiness to last a dozen lifetimes. If I’d known that summer at Citrine Cove, as your father got down on one knee, that forever would only be twelve years, I’d still have said yes.” She shook her head. “No. I would’ve beaten him to it and asked the moment we both knew.”
“I’m pretty sure my soulmate isn’t waiting at that cove. Besides, I’m not looking for one. Just need someone who is willing to agree to my terms. A girl who’ll be happy living separate lives.”
She dealt me another smack upside the head. “What on earth are you saying?”
Rubbing the spot, I mumbled, “This is child abuse, you know.”
“No one would be happy living a separate life from their husband. While they’re out seeking real companionship, they’ll find someone who fills that void and the sham you’ve created will fall apart.”
“It doesn’t have to last long,” I said simply. “Just long enough.”
“Nathan, stop this silliness. Why should you propose to a girl you don’t love when Belle will be there?”
I stiffened. “What?”
“Belle. Belle Adler.” Mom pulled something out of the drawer. “The information packet had a list of—”
Springing up, I took the folder from her. “Why do you have this? Who gave it to you?”
She shot me a stern look that was so my mom, it stoked embers of hope I thought I had doused a long time ago.