Silent Love

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Silent Love Page 5

by Kenadee Bryant


  As Luke pressed all the right buttons to get us to the main screen, I quickly finished my drink and went to throw it away. When I came back I found Ethan’s long legs in my spot and a little on Macey, who was so focused on choosing her character she didn’t notice.

  “Move,” I said, standing in front of the couch.

  “I’m too comfortable to move,” he said, grinning.

  “Want me to sit on you?” I threatened.

  “Now that’s an idea.” Of course, only dirty thoughts entered my mind at this. Forcing the blush down, I looked at Ethan.

  “Fine.” With that, I jumped down on his legs.

  “Ow! That hurts!” Ethan yelled.

  “Payback for taking my seat.” I grinned over at him before grabbing my controller and turning to the screen.

  “Carter, I worry about you. You actually believe that it hurts? You weigh like twenty pounds,” Ethan said, giving me a flat look. While continuing to stare, he jerked his legs back from under me making me fall onto Macey.

  “Carter, you have to take me on a date before we get this close,” Macey said, grinning down at me. I stuck my tongue out at her.

  “Babe, I think we’ve gone on enough dates.” I winked at her before pushing myself off of her and back into my spot. Ethan now had his legs back on the ground and was smirking at me. Smacking his shoulder, I looked away from him.

  “Okay, let’s start!” Luke was sitting down by my feet on the floor, so he tilted his head up to look at me.

  “Don’t go throwing your controller if you lose. This isn’t home,” he warned, hitting “Start” before I could hit him. It was quiet for a few minutes, the only sound being the clicking of our controller buttons.

  “Yoshi, come on,” I muttered under my breath at the character I had picked. Luke had picked the Moo Moo Meadows course this time. We had a system where every person picked a course, then if we continued to play then we went back around the circle.

  One hour and eight courses later, we called it quits on Super Mario. I had taken great satisfaction in beating everyone three times, but the other five times I got either second or third place. Now everyone was complaining about how hungry they were, me included. It was almost two in the afternoon and neither of the hungover triplets had eaten anything. Thankfully, though, they were all pretty much better by now and only had slight headaches.

  “I’m hungry! Make me something to eat, Carter!” Luke whined, flopping on the chair to the left of the couch.

  “Yeah, Carter!” both Macey and Ethan chimed in.

  “Why do I have to cook you something? I’m not your maid.”

  “But you are the only one of us four who can really cook,” Luke reasoned. It was true too. Luke was a disaster in the kitchen. If it wasn’t cereal, toast, or ramen, he’d probably burn it. Same with Ethan, although he could at least make a little more than Luke. The only thing Macey could really cook was sweets. She made the best chocolate chip cookies, but regular food wasn’t the same.

  “Yeah, so chop chop.” Ethan snapped his fingers at me.

  “You guys need to learn to cook something other than ramen and toast. I’m not going to be around forever to cook for you.”

  “Yes, you will. You’re going to be one of those crazy dog ladies that lives next door to one of us,” Ethan said.

  “I can see it,” Luke chimed in.

  “Hey! Are you saying I’m going to be forever alone?” I looked between them.

  “Not alone, Car. You will have your twenty dogs with you.” Ethan cracked up at his own joke, slapping hands with Luke.

  “Wow, you are so funny I forgot to laugh,” I deadpanned. “Mace, they are being rude to me!” I whined to her.

  “Nice. Go and tell ‘Mommy’,” Luke said, rolling his eyes.

  “Ew, don’t ever call me Mommy,” she replied, a look of disgust on her face.

  “Oh, that’s because you want to call me Daddy, isn’t it?” Luke wiggled his eyebrows at her.

  “Yes, because I just call you Daddy all the time.” Macey rolled her eyes at him.

  “You would in the bedroom—”

  “Ewww, shut up! Shut up! Shut up!” I yelled, placing my hands over my ears. That was so disgusting. I did not need the image of my best friend and brother doing it in my head.

  “Aww, little baby Carter is so innocent,” Ethan remarked, poking my cheeks. I slapped his hand away, glaring at him.

  “I am not. I’d just rather not throw up in my mouth listening to your dirty talk.”

  “Don’t worry, Carter. If it doesn’t happen for you, you can just live vicariously through us.” He patted my shoulder, giving me a sympathetic look. Like I would do that. But they were right about me living alone with twenty dogs. I’ve only had two boyfriends in my lifetime. Well, one didn’t count because it was in middle school and it lasted for a week. You know those middle school relationships where you only hang out during lunch and maybe pass a few notes here and there; that was all it was. Most of the time we didn’t even see each other, so after a week it ended.

  Then my “second” boyfriend was my first actual one and the first time I fell in love with someone other than Ethan. His name was Quinton, we were in the same grade, and he was considered popular alongside my brother and Ethan. He played both soccer and baseball and was everything a girl wanted in the looks department. He had the all-American look about him—blonde hair, blue eyes, high cheek bones, and a nice jawline. He was fit but not overly muscular; he had the body of a well-toned soccer player—lean and tall.

  When he asked me out our junior year, I hesitated at first because I was so into Ethan that I felt like I would be cheating on him with Quinton. After a lot of wooing and Macey telling me I had to go for it to get over Ethan, I finally accepted the date. With it being my first date, I was beyond nervous and it didn’t help I had my mom, Aunt Kay, and Macey there helping me get ready. I made the mistake of telling my mom I had a date, which in turn made her call Aunt Kacey to come over and do my makeup. The entire time I had to listen to my mom and Kacey reminisce about their own dating pasts. I was pleading with Macey all the while to help me get out of there.

  Then of course once Quinton got there my father, my brother, and even Ethan took it upon themselves to interrogate him. My father asked him all about his family, what he wanted to do after high school, what his grades were like, if he did sports, who he dated before, etc. Even though my brother and Ethan already knew Quinton, they still questioned him while glaring. They stood above him, glaring, with their arms crossed while he sat on the couch. To say it was embarrassing was an understatement. With the help of both Mom and Aunt Kay I was able to grab his arm and get us out of the house.

  The date started off pretty rocky. He decided to take me to some fancy restaurant that had tiny portions of food and snotty old people staring at us. After we left we were both still hungry. I had never seen Quinton more nervous or sorry in my life as we got in the car that night. When I told him it was fine, we ended up going to McDonald’s and then to the arcade. From then on it was super fun.

  We ended up dating for a year, much to my brother and Ethan’s disappointment. My father wasn’t as thrilled either but accepted it. But when we would be at my house, Dad kept peeking his head in at us every so often and made sure my bedroom door was open. The two boys did the same as well during the whole time we dated.

  It was the middle of our senior year when all our happiness and love went down the drain. We had already confessed our love for one another and I was finally getting over Ethan. Every once in a while, I would still feel jealous or butterflies in my stomach seeing him, but being with Quinton made me forget about them. It was the night of his soccer championship game. We hadn’t hung out in a little while, since he was so focused on practice and winning the game, and I was busy sending in college applications.

  After a lot of thought I made the decision that that night would be the night. Quinton never really pressured me into having sex and I was grateful he didn
’t, but lately, I felt like I was losing him. At the time it sounded like a good choice, but now I realized how stupid I was. I thought that, since I loved him so much and he loved me too, that this would work out and be amazing. Plus, it would be my present for him winning the championship.

  That entire day I made sure I had everything ready. I shaved, made sure to wear my sexiest underwear and bra, and had a plan so my parents would think I was with Macey instead of Quinton all night. I had sat on the cold, hard benches cheering for him all night and when his team won, I was out of my seat in an instant. Pushing my way through the crowd, I made my way toward the field to congratulate him. After shoving people out of my way not really caring at that point, I saw something that made me heart shatter.

  Standing in front of me was my boyfriend kissing Rebecca Prince, the slut of our school. But the term “kissing” wasn’t accurate; it was more like they were making out and practically grinding against one another right on the field, oblivious to everyone around them. His hands were in her hair while hers were around his waist, pulling him into her. I watched as they broke apart and grinned at each other. The sight made my heart fall because I knew that look. It was the same look he had given me once upon a time, and the same look my parents shared with one another. Not wanting to be seen, I turned and ran to my car to head to Macey’s.

  Over the next few days, Quinton texted me a few times but not enough to show he actually cared that I wasn’t at the game the other night. I didn’t reply and spent most of the time crying and eating my fill of ice cream. When I got back to school on Monday, I ignored him until right before the day ended when he dragged me into an empty classroom. I wanted to yell and hit him, but as I stood in front of him, I felt empty. When I told him I knew, his face only showed a flash of guilt. I found out he had been seeing Rebecca for almost three months, all the while I was thinking he was busy because of school, soccer, and trying to get into college.

  I didn’t have it in me to yell as we broke up. I didn’t want anyone to know that he had cheated on me, especially my brother and Ethan. I knew they would find him and beat him bloody. So after we both promised not to tell anyone that he cheated, I left the room and didn’t look back. And to this day no one knew the truth but Macey and my mom. I made my mom promise to never tell my father because he would go on a rampage and never let me date again. Ethan and Luke thought we broke up because we were both busy with school and college applications, not questioning it. They did get angry seeing Quinton with Rebecca only a few days after we broke up, which the entire school knew the next day.

  I didn’t talk to Quinton after that and went out of my way to ignore him as the school year went on. I wanted to forgive him and maybe I did now, but I wasn’t over him breaking my heart. I probably wouldn’t ever be. Your first heartbreak was something you remembered forever. I heard he got an audition to play for the national soccer team after graduation. I was happy for him, but that was all I felt. It had been almost a year since we broke up and I was somewhat over it, but with that ending, my feelings for Ethan came back full force.

  “Where’s Amy?” Luke asked, jerking me out of my depressing thoughts.

  “Yeah, where is she?” I wondered.

  “Honestly, I have no idea. I lost her a little bit into the party last night and haven’t heard from her. Let me text her to make sure she is okay,” Macey said, grabbing her phone.

  “So, where’s my food?” Ethan asked, staring at the side of my face.

  “In the fridge waiting for you to get up and make it yourself,” I shot back.

  “Wow, good one,” he said sarcastically.

  “Can’t we just order pizza?” Macey asked.

  “No, Ethan and I can’t have all that fat,” Luke said.

  “Why not? It’s just pizza. It can be considered healthy because it has tomatoes, dairy, meat, and grains,” I reasoned.

  “As much as I agree with you on that, we can’t. Coach doesn’t let us have any big, fatty food before a game, especially our first game of the season,” Luke said, shrugging.

  “Ugh, fine. I will cook us something.” I groaned, standing up and heading to the kitchen. “Is Amy coming over?” I asked Macey.

  “No, she said she is staying in today. Apparently really hungover.” I nodded before opening the fridge up. Thankfully, it was pretty full of all kinds of food.

  “Anything you guys are in the mood for?” I asked.

  “Chicken!” “Grilled Cheese!” “Eggs and bacon!” came everyone’s response.

  “That helped,” I muttered. Seeing an egg carton and some bacon on a shelf, I took both out. Eggs and bacon, it was, for lunch. While I moved around Luke and Ethan’s little kitchen looking for pots and pans, the three of them sat in the living room talking about God knew what. As much as I wanted to say I hated when they made me cook, I couldn’t. I knew it was stupid, but I liked knowing that they needed me, even if it was to cook while they sat around.

  I listened to their bickering while I cracked eggs into a bowl. All three of them were talking about which coffee was better, and of course none of them were agreeing.

  “Carter, what kind of coffee is better?” Luke yelled over to me. I had my back turned to him but still answered.

  “You mean style wise? Because I’d have to say either a Frap or a latte is the best.” I liked hot coffee when it was cold, but sometimes it was too hot to drink and had to wait for a while.

  “I disagree. You can’t go wrong with a regular cup of coffee,” Luke reasoned. I rolled my eyes as I dumped the bowl of eggs into the pan on the stove. Their arguing continued as Macey said she only liked lattes, then Ethan had to butt in about cappuccinos. I ignored them as I continued making lunch.

  This was literally what happened every time we hung out. Someone had to bring up the stupidest arguments and it just started everyone off on their own opinions. But I guess it was a good way of learning what each other liked. There were certainly no dull moments between us. Yes, sometimes I didn’t want to hang out with my brother, but mostly Macey and I did. Since we all grew up together, we had just become so comfortable around each other.

  A few minutes later I finished the food. Along with the eggs and bacon I made some toast, but they would have to butter it themselves if they wanted. It looked like I made a shit-ton of food, but I knew both of the boys would eat practically all of it. Grabbing some plates, I put them on the counter before calling over to the three rugrats.

  “Guys, food is ready.” Immediately I heard the sounds of Luke and Ethan’s feet bounding toward me. Macey trailed behind them, knowing not to get in their way when they heard the word “food.” If you were in their way, you would most likely be trampled; we both learned that years ago.

  “Please don’t eat all of it, okay? Save some for Mace and me,” I commented as they grabbed plates.

  “You’re the best, Car,” Ethan said, placing a kiss on the top of my head before moving to scoop some eggs. I felt myself turning bright red and ducked my head. My stomach erupted into butterflies. Damn him and his way of making my knees feel like Jell-O. I leaned against the counter trying to get my knees to stop feeling so weak.

  Macey passed by me, quickly squeezing my shoulder sympathetically before grabbing a plate for herself. Both of us knew that the kiss didn’t mean anything, but of course my heart didn’t know nor get that. It pounded away as I willed the blush to go away. You would think that after four years of my silent love I would be used to these feelings, but they seemed to grow even more.

  “Carter, are you coming to come eat or not?” Luke asked, already back in the living room with everyone else. Shaking my head, I grabbed a plate before heading to the living room as well. As I predicted, both boys had their plates filled and were busy munching away. Sliding next to Macey, I got comfortable as Ethan turned on the TV.

  “So, Macey, I never really asked, but what are you majoring in?” Ethan asked, bringing a piece of bacon to his lips.

  “I’m studying to be a chemi
cal engineer.”

  “Wow, I didn’t know you were that smart,” Luke commented, looking impressed. Macey stuck her tongue out at him but didn’t reply.

  “But seriously, that is pretty cool. Isn’t that a really tough major, though?” Ethan asked.

  “Not if you are as smart as she is,” I muttered, taking a bite of my toast.

  “It can be hard, but since I am so interested in it I feel like I will do okay, and isn’t college where you stress about homework and tests, all the while having a great time?” Macey answered.

  While we ate, we all talked about our classes and what kind of games the boys would be playing. I cleaned up the kitchen shortly after because of course I got nominated to do so. But after threatening my brother that I wouldn’t come over and cook if he didn’t help me, he did. While I washed and he dried the dishes, I felt myself become content for the moment. It felt like we were both back home and cleaning up after just eating with our parents. And it also helped that he kept complaining about how I had to pick out real plates instead of the plastic ones they had. Yeah, just like old times.

  The boys decided to let Macey and I play Call of Duty with them, but of course not without making a huge deal about how we didn’t know how to play. After both arguing over who would get me and Macey, they finally decided I would be with Ethan and Macey with Luke. I would like to disagree with both boys that we did know how to play, but I couldn’t. Macey and I both sucked ass at this game even though we had tried to play it hundreds of times.

  “Carter!” Ethan groaned in front of me as his player died again.

  “What! I didn’t do anything!” I protested, trying to reload my gun.

  “You let Luke shoot me! I told you to keep watch and shoot anyone who comes this way, or at least to tell me.” Apparently, my skills on this game were a zero. I rolled my eyes at him before hitting the button to make me scope out. Someone passed through the lens. I hit the fire button repeatedly.

  “I died!” Macey yelled a second later, hitting the buttons on the controller repeatedly.

 

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