And, I can’t believe I just told her almost everything. She didn’t need to know that Cam’s mother is a heartless bitch. I could have just left it at me wanting my son and Sheri didn’t.
“What a darling.” Deirdre smiles and leans forward, rubbing the knuckle of her finger against Cam’s cheek.
Cam leans toward her, arms out, completely shocking me. “He must like you.”
Deirdre laughs and picks him up. She has him standing on her thighs facing her. “Well, I think I like him too. What a handsome guy.”
“Really! Cam doesn’t go to strangers. Ever.” Usually he cries when someone other than me, my parents, Larry, or his afternoon sitter picks him up. Maybe he’s finally growing out of that stage.
“I should take him.” Larry’s lifting Cam before I can form an objection. “He needs to be fed.”
It’s his lunchtime and it’ll be easier to talk to Deidre without Cam between us. At least physically. He’s certainly there now. I’m just afraid to find out if she’s going to bolt the minute she has a chance. Instead, she sits back and sips her coffee.
“Single dad, gallery owner and a teacher. You’ve got to be busy.”
“Yep, and it explains my lack of social life.”
She chuckles. “School is my excuse. I just don’t have time. I’ve needed this break.”
“No plans while you’re in town?”
She shrugs. “Nothing set. Just seeing what the day brings.”
“Maybe we can have dinner or something?” I try not to hold my breath, but I really expect an evasive answer, like we’ll see what happens.
“That would be great.” She grins and my stomach unclenches.
“Jesse,” Larry calls as she comes down stairs carrying Cam. “He doesn’t want to eat right now and I’ve got to get lunch if I’m going to be back in time for you to go to Baxter.”
I glance at my phone. It’s about eleven. She can’t feed Cam, eat and be back before 12:30?
“Not a problem,” I take Cam from her and check his head and cheeks. The only time Cam doesn’t eat is when he’s getting ill, or teeth, and both bring on a slight fever. But his face is cool. “Can you bring his food down so I can keep an eye on the front of the shop?”
“Sure thing,” she agrees and practically runs up the stairs.
The bell above the door tinkles and I glance through the opening from the back to see two customers enter.
“Do you mind?” I ask Deirdre. If I were alone, I’d take Cam with me, but lately he’s been reaching for everything. Last week he got his hands on a pot, which was too heavy for him to hold, but he moved it just far enough to the edge of the shelf that it fell and crashed on the floor. I’m going to need to keep him from the front of the gallery as much as possible.
“Not at all,” Deirdre says as she takes Cam from me.
Cam grins and goes to her and I’m so glad that he’s gotten over crying when someone unfamiliar wants to hold him.
Three
Larry slows as she comes down the stairs. She’s carrying a small bowl and a bottle. “Where’s Jesse?”
“Customers came in.” I nod to the front of the gallery. There’s an opening and I can see him talking to two women about some pots that are on display.
Larry glances toward Jesse and then me, before coming forward and placing the bottle and bowl on the table. “Here, let me take him.” She holds out her hands for Cam, but he doesn’t lean toward her as I expected.
“That’s okay. I’ll feed him so you can go to lunch.” I am not exactly ready to relinquish Cam. He’s such a cutie and it’s been so long since I held a child this young. Not that I want one of my own, at least not for five years or so, but I still like holding him.
“He’s not familiar with you,” she points out.
“Believe me, I’ve done my share of babysitting.” I laugh. “Besides, Jesse won’t be gone long and you need to eat yourself.”
“I’ll be fine.” Larry sits on the stool and scoops up something that looks like oatmeal and waves the spoon in front of Cam’s face.
He turns his head away, not at all interested in what Larry has to offer. I can’t really blame it. The stuff looks gross.
“It’s probably best you go. Cam won’t eat if he’s distracted by you and Jesse gets worried if Cam doesn’t eat, and on a schedule.” She puts the spoon back in the bowl and reaches for Cam again. This time she takes him from me, almost jerking that little boy from my arms.
The bell above the door rings again and more customers come in. “Maybe you should help out Jesse instead.”
“He’d rather I see to Cam,” she assures me and tilts Cam back enough for him to take the bottle. “That’s why I’m here.” She looks up and meets my eyes. “He couldn’t get by without me.”
With that, even more customers come in. It’s like Grand Central Station and I suddenly feel unwanted, by Larry at least, and in the way. “Well, tell Jesse I’ll catch up with him later sometime.” I stand.
“You can use that door.” She points to one leading out back.
I haven’t had a rush of customers like that in a long time. I sold two painting and three pots. An excellent start to Spring Break, but it sucks that I left Deirdre hanging in the back with Cam. I’m sure she didn’t expect to become an instant babysitter when she stopped in.
“Sorry about that,” I step into the back but Deirdre isn’t there. Instead, Larry is trying to get Cam to eat. Half of the bottle is gone but the food is still in the bowl. This was the third time I’ve tried this brand and not once has Cam eaten it. Time to toss it and try something new.
“Where’s Deirdre?”
“She left. Said she had things to do.”
Shit. I was kind of hoping she was using the bathroom and not gone completely.
“Got out of here as soon as I came back downstairs. Like she was in a hurry or something.”
I should have known she’d bolt. Can’t really blame her.
“Mind if I run down and get a sandwich from Sullivan’s before you leave?”
My head snaps to Larry. “You didn’t get lunch yet?”
She sheepishly smiles. “I couldn’t just leave Cam alone and he needed to eat.”
“I’m sorry.” I take my son from Larry. “If I had known, I would have come and got him. I thought Deirdre was here and you’d already left.”
“It’s fine,” Larry assures me and pats my arm.
I hate it when she does that and have asked her not to more than once, but I’m not even sure she’s aware she does it. Some people are just touchy. At least it’s innocent enough and it’s kind of in a mothering way and the reason I keep her around. Not that I need a mother, but she’s good with Cam.
“I’ll be right back because I already called it in.”
“Thanks.”
After she leaves I lock the front door and take Cam upstairs to change his diaper. “Well, Little Dude, looks like she left us.” I’m referring to Deirdre. “I liked her and she seemed to like you.” He’s grinning at me, like he always does. “That’s okay though. We don’t need no woman. We’re doing just fine, right?”
I grab the Cheerios on the way back down stairs and put Cam in his highchair. I don’t know why Larry hadn’t put him in it before. Maybe he’d have eaten better there than on her lap.
After unlocking the front door again, I add a few Cheerios to Cam’s tray and return to the inventory I was doing before Deirdre showed up. I guess I will be making more pots over break, instead of taking a hot girl to lunch and dinner.
I know I shouldn’t be disappointed, and I hardly know her, but I am. A lot disappointed. But, it’s not like I can change my circumstances and I wouldn’t trade Cam for anything in the world.
“I brought you a burger, just the way you like it,” Larry says as she comes in the back door carrying a large sack.
“You didn’t need to do that.”
“You need to eat too,” she reminds me. “Can’t have you getting sick.”
&n
bsp; I roll my eyes. Larry is like a mother, but I don’t need one. Especially not someone who is sixteen. “Here.” I take a ten from my billfold. “Thanks.”
She smiles up at me. “You know I’d do anything for you.” Her eyes soften and I take a step back.
What the hell? “Well, I appreciate you taking care of Cam.” I grab the carryout container and head upstairs. “Please keep an eye on him and the shop while I get ready for school.”
As soon as I’m upstairs, I stop in the middle of my kitchen. I could have eaten down there but Larry’s words disturbed me, and that look in her eyes. Surely she doesn’t mean anything by it?
I shake my head. I’m reading too much into the situation. She’s a kid and has no idea what she’s saying.
But, there was a tone.
No. She’s just being nice and concerned.
Still, maybe it’s time to lessen her hours. Not that she works that many. Just on Friday night, Saturdays and Sundays, and when I need a sitter on occasion. Cam has a regular afternoon sitter that I take him to on the way to school. But, Sally’s kids will be home on break and I saw no point in adding to her household when I could keep Cam home and Larry could sit. I mean, what high school kid doesn’t jump at the chance to earn extra money, right? But, why should she have to give up her Spring Break when I’m going to be around. She’s probably just being too nice to tell me no, or is afraid that she’ll lose her job. And, I kind of just assumed she’d be free.
Larry already works every weekend and it isn’t really fair to ask her to work all week too.
Yep, that’s what I’m going to do. Give her Spring Break off. It isn’t like I’ll need a sitter or someone to watch the shop because I won’t be taking anyone to dinner after all.
I quickly change, eat half the burger, and put the rest in the fridge to have for dinner tonight and head back downstairs. Cam is in his playpen and Larry is standing at the front counter waiting for customers to come in.
“Hey, I’ve been thinking.”
She turns and smiles. “Yes?”
“Since I don’t plan on doing anything next week, why don’t you take Monday through Friday off and enjoy your break?” I turn the sign on the front door to “Closed”. I don’t like having a kid watch the gallery and Cam when I’m not close and Baxter is about twenty minutes away. Larry’s attention needs to be on my son, and I’m never open at this time during the week anyway.
Her smile dims. “You need me here.”
I shrug and turn the locks on the door and head to the back. “Not really. I don’t have class and can take care of everything. Have some fun for a change.”
I stop in front of Cam and kiss the top of his head. “Be good for Larry, okay Buddy.” Why wasn’t she happy I didn’t need her to work? Most kids would be thrilled with the freedom. Didn’t she have friends she wanted to hang out with next week?
“Don’t forget.” I stop at the back door. “I’ll be at work late setting up the Baxter gallery. I should be home by seven. Your parents know, right?”
“Yeah, they know.” Her tone is laced with disappointment.
I nod and leave. Maybe I should give her some hours next week after all. I did already promise she could make extra money by helping out and if she’s like the average teenager, that paycheck has already been spent.
Four
The house is empty when I get back, but I expected that. Kian and Alexia are both at work and my other siblings, at least those in college, won’t be coming home until Friday. This is one of the first years since all of us have been in either college or high school that our break is happening at the same time.
I drop my keys on the dining room table and wander into the kitchen. Seeing Jesse for the first time since November went great, at first. I could have sat there enjoying coffee and talking to him all day, but he was getting busy and I didn’t need to be hanging out in the back. Between Cam and his customers he had his hands full. And, he did have Larry.
What the hell is up with her? I get the crush, but does Jesse have any idea how the girl feels?
No. He’s clueless. I could tell by their interaction.
Should I say something?
Is it even any of my business?
Hell, I don’t even know if I’m going to see him again. It’s not like we made plans. He just asked if I wanted to have dinner sometime. Then again, we didn’t exactly get a chance to firm up details.
I’m also not ready to give up. Especially after today. That connection I originally felt was still there. But, I’m also going to give if a few days. Tomorrow would be too soon. Maybe I’ll stop in again on Saturday and take my sister with me. We can be out shopping, make it all innocent and stuff.
A grin pulls at my lips. Yep, that’s what I’m going to do. If he doesn’t mention dinner again, then I’ll give up.
My phone rings as I open the fridge. “Hey, Kian. What’s up?”
“Alexia and I dropped her car at the shop this morning for an oil change and tune up.”
“Okay.” Why is he telling me this?
“I just found out that I have a mandatory meeting after work so I won’t be able to pick her up.”
“No problem.” I’ve never been to Baxter, or at least not on the campus but I know where it is.
“She’s changing out art in the gallery with new displays for Spring Break so she’ll be working later too.”
“It’s not like I have plans.” I laugh. It’s sad because I really wish I had plans with Jesse. “Do you have a guesstimate of a time?”
“Sixish?”
“I’ll be there.”
“Great.” He sounds relieved. Did he think I’d not get her? “Use the gallery door off the parking lot. If it’s not open just knock or text her and let her know you’re there.”
I tell him goodbye and hang up. Well, at least I now have one solid plan for my break. Picking up who I assume will one day be my sister-in-law. The excitement is almost more than I can take.
“Stop that,” I say to an empty room. Just because I didn’t get a confirmed date with Jesse doesn’t mean there isn’t hope. I’ll be here a week and a half. Surely I’ll get a chance to spend time with Jesse again. If it doesn’t happen after seeing him on Saturday, then I’ll forget him and no more what ifs.
Before each art class is dismissed, Alexia and I have the kids wrap and box their old pieces of artwork from the gallery. Some of it will be stored and others are loaded into the back of my truck to take to my gallery for sale. Then we have them bring up the newer pieces to put on display. We didn’t let them put anything up, but just had them stacked along one wall. Alexia and I are facing a room of bare walls and empty stands. This is going to take longer than I thought. It always does. We’ve been changing out the gallery quarterly, right before each break, and each time we have more and more art that’s worthy of display. At this rate, and the caliber of artists coming through Baxter, we might need to ask the board to add on to the building.
“Well, let’s get started,” Alexia says brightly and begins grabbing paintings and leaning them along the wall. I follow and do the same. Paintings always go up first so we can stand back and make sure they flow the way we want before adding the ceramics to the stands.
“So, Deirdre is staying with you for Spring Break?” I try to sound nonchalant, but I’m digging for information.
“Yeah.” Alexia switches two paintings out and moves further down the wall. “Where did you see her?”
“She was out wandering around this morning and came into the gallery.” I grab more paintings and added them to the long line. Alexia will rearrange them if she wants.
“All of Kian’s siblings are going to be home for the break.” She frowns and moves a painting to an opposite wall. “Except Brenden. The Army doesn’t get Spring Break.” She chuckles and starts hanging the paintings on the hooks already attached to the wall.
“Um, is she…you know…seeing anyone?” So much for being nonchalant.
Alexia glances ov
er her shoulder and gives an intrigued look with one eyebrow raised and the side of her mouth quirked.
My face heats. Damn, it’s like I’m sixteen again.
“I don’t believe so,” she answers slowly. “Thinking about asking her out?”
I shrug. “Maybe lunch or dinner.”
She chuckles and goes back to hanging the paintings.
I do want to ask Deirdre out but what if she isn’t interested? She bolted the moment my back was turned. Would I have better luck if we had gotten to know each other better before she found out about Cam?
Maybe, but she’d probably be pissed after investing time and then finding out I have a kid. It isn’t something you kind of drop into a conversation after you’ve had a handful of dates.
Hell, she probably won’t even go, but I’m going to give it one more shot. If she shoots me down, I’ll just forget about her. “Do you mind giving me her number?”
“Why don’t you get it yourself?” Alexia looks over at me and grins.
How the hell am I supposed to do that? Go to Alexia’s house and ask for her or hope Deirdre comes into the shop again? I guess I could stand at the window of my gallery and watch for her to walk by, but that’s all rather pathetic.
“She just pulled in,” Alexia adds.
I glance out the door and sure enough, Deirdre is getting out of her car and walking toward the gallery. My pulse increases. Damn, she has nice legs. She hadn’t been in shorts earlier, but she is now and she looks hot.
“She’s giving me a ride home because my car’s in the shop.”
I could have taken Alexia home. We live like four blocks from each other. Though, this is much better.
The public door to the gallery is locked because we are technically closed so I hurry over to open it for her. Deirdre’s light brown eyes widen in surprise.
I hope it’s a good surprise and not an oh shit, I avoided him once already today surprise.
Casting Doubt Page 2