‘No, I was interested. I needed to know more and you were being a little difficult, as you can remember.’
‘I was not difficult, I met you, you were an asshole, I reacted to your actions.’
He stopped eating and gave me his full attention. ‘Why are you like that?’
‘Like what?’
‘Tough. You’ve been a spoiled princess your whole life, why would you need to develop those walls?’
‘No walls, I’ve just always wanted to be as I am. I’m not trying to please anyone.’
‘So you prefer to be closed’
I was going to go to that dark explanation. ‘No, I just react to actions. I learned since I was really young that I didn’t have to pretend to be nice and kind to survive in this world, even when it was always expected. I live in the Stepford Wife world and that’s the last thing I ever want to be, fake. Yeah, people don’t like me, but I am not a bad person. I’m just as true to me as I can be, you know?’
He smiled. He knew my world too, he was the prototype of man in it. ‘I don’t think you are a bad person, I know for a fact that you are awesome, you are brilliant, funny and kind.’
‘Now that we are in the compliments, let’s talk about you Berkeley. Why are you like that? No friends, no please or thank you, no girlfriends, you are also a little bastard, you know?’
He stared again. For someone that handsome he really didn’t like the spotlight. He was thinking, I couldn’t figure out what was on his mind, buy it wasn’t nice.
‘I was an asshole before, then that day happened. I trusted the wrong people, only Marc and Spencer stayed with me; so no, I don’t need more friends, I have the best I can get. I suppose you’re talking about Max and Joe, with the no please or thank you thing. I don’t have to say that, they work for me. I trust them, they’re just receiving orders. They are really good men and know that my respect doesn’t come in words. And I’ve already talked to you about relationships. I have to direct a company that has more than six thousand employees, just in this country. I can’t afford to be distracted and until lately I thought no one was worth the effort.’
And they say I am cold! This man had attended three different personal things in the most practical, unattached way. The last phrase was weird and out of the storyline, but everything else shocked me. For the first time I understood what people meant about my decisions being clinical. I thought I was practical, but Dylan was purely mechanical. His speech was really dissonant with his hand making little circles on the skin of my hand. His touch was warm but his words were frozen.
‘Something to think about Ms. Bianchi?’
He was challenging me but I knew the topic was over. Even if I had asked more questions, he was not answering further than his learned speech.
‘No Berkeley, just being bored by the cold ass.’
‘We are quite a pair Katherine, a pair of ices.’
‘Don’t compare me to yourself, Berkeley. I am a nice lady that happens to swear and that doesn’t take bullshit from anyone, you’re purely closed.’
He took my hand in his, slowly, silent and kissed my palm.
‘You are a beautiful lady, Katherine.’
He kissed my hand again and my insides melted. But we were taking things slow, so I hit the brakes.
‘I need to go home Berkeley, some asshole filled my office with flowers and my allergy pills are making me sleepy.’
He smiled and got closer to me. ‘He must be an asshole if he needed to fill the office.’
‘He is, but he gave me pizza, pizza kills asshole.’
‘Let’s take you home doll.’ He was truly happy, he kissed my hand again and helped me to stand up.
My eyelids were heavy and I just wanted my bed. We stayed on our sides of the SUV, but his hand caressed my knee the whole way. It just made me even sleepier. When we finally arrived, Dylan went to my side and carried me in his arms.
‘What are you doing? I can walk!’
‘I know.’ He smiled to me and kept walking.
‘So, why are you doing this?’
‘Because I really need to touch you and I know this is the closest we’ll be tonight.’
I was being carried and even in that position I felt my knickers on the floor among my jaw. Cold and fucking sweet, that was Blue Eyes. He opened my door with his illegal key, took me to my room and laid me on the bed.
‘Good night, doll.’ He kissed my forehead and turned to leave.
‘Good night Blue Eyes.’
He came back to me and smirked. I am sure I couldn’t have said it aloud, but he was smiling in a funny way. He kissed my mouth, a chaste, quick, soft kiss on the lips and then kissed my forehead again.
Chapter 19
That week our routine remained almost the same: working, funny texts, dinner, goodbye sweet kiss. Everyday a different restaurant, a little exhibition of the best New York fast food cuisine, tacos, burgers, pizza, hot dogs, buffalo wings, name it.
Saturday, my ME day, was hijacked by this blue eyed character. At a decent hour he let himself into my apartment and found me watching TV in bed wearing my least appealing pair of sweatpants.
‘Cultivating your mind, Katherine?’
‘Cultivating my ass, Berkeley. Who invited you here?’
He took my chin between his fingers in a rough and hot as hell way.
‘I don’t ever need an invitation to your bed, Katherine.’
A stare duel started, his eyes were dark and deep and my breathing became affected out of nowhere, but I would rather die in those clothes than lose our little eye battle. After what seemed an eternity he kissed me; a powerful, violent, perfect kiss.
‘Now that we have made that clear for you, move over, I have to work.’ He got into my bed and turned on his iPad.
Wow! I want him now. Once again, even if I wanted them, I was not the kind of girl who asked for attentions. I watched my TV while he worked in my bed. His perfect jeans and white shirt were his hot weekend working uniform. Every now and then I allowed myself to stare.
Every inch of his face was more perfect than the other. His bone structure was something I wanted to patent. Those blue eyes had the kind of color that you only can get from hours researching pantones; nose of a statue and then those lips. They were not only beautiful but when he smiled they made things in my belly, I didn’t know how they were connected, but it appeared they had known each other for a long time. Being a silly girl again, princess? Blue Eyes noticed I was ogling.
‘We have to get out of here before I can’t control myself!’ He put his iPad on my night table and stood up.
Please! Show me how you lose control! Please!
‘Ok, I just have to change my clothes first.’
I put on a pair of skinny jeans, a white long blouse and some nude ballerina flats. I didn’t know where we were going but from experience I knew there was going to be junk food included so I didn’t have to wear high heels.
Taking my hand in his, he dismissed Joe and Max and we just walked. A couple of times I tried to remove my hand from his, but every single time he squeezed it harder, his grip unbreakable. The third time he came to my ear and whispered. ‘I’m not letting you go doll, get used to this.’
It wasn’t that bad so I played along.
‘Are you trying to kill me? I can’t walk anymore!’
‘Stop, we are almost there.’
Surprise, surprise, for no one, we were back to that place, the Bethesda Fountain. Again he didn’t stop until we arrived to the Angel Tunnel. He sat on the floor and made me sit next to him. Thank God I wore jeans! As the first time, he laid down and put his head on my lap.
‘Someone likes this spot!’
‘It’s perfect.’
He was looking me in the eye, my girl brain wanted me to believe he was talking about me, my real brain knew he was just talking about his love for this place. Either way I needed to distract his attention from me.
‘What are we doing here?’
‘Yo
ur bed is distracting.’
‘What was it distracting you from?’
‘Work.’
‘You always work on weekends?’
‘I have a company to run, you know that, right?’
‘Yes, but it’s weird and don’t get me wrong, I love my job, but sometimes you need your head to stop thinking.’
He frowned at me. ‘Work makes me stop thinking.’
‘Now I am lost, I know this sounds stupid but what I want to stop thinking about is my job, that’s the part of my life with problems. And then, work is the break for you, so you want to stop thinking about other kinds of problems, right?’
‘Memories in fact.’ There was sadness in his face, his mind was in a dark place.
Fuck! Tricky topic.
‘I know I have no right, but… you shouldn’t be avoiding thinking about your parents.’ I knew this was about them and I couldn’t fight my need to tell him.
‘It hurts, if I don’t think about them it doesn’t hurt. Easy.’
‘It can’t hurt every time, think of something nice. Tell me one thing that your parents had that you can’t find in anyone else.’
He closed his eyes, I didn’t know where this shrink thing came from, but we were spending all of our free time together and I barely knew him. Barely? You know every piece of shit that Internet stalking could find.
‘My mom was the kindest woman on Earth, she would do anything to help anyone, she was beautiful, but people really turned around to look at her because she was so nice that she shone. It sounds weird but I swear she did. I noticed since I was a little boy she wasn’t only kind to me or to dad, but to everyone. That’s why the charity meant so much to her.’
His eyes were shut. I didn’t know if it was because he was trying to remember them or if he was avoiding my eyes.
‘She sounds lovely Dylan, it’s weird but she reminds me of my own mom. Now your dad.’
It took him a moment, but he started again. ‘He loved my mom, he truly loved her, as if she was the only woman in the world. I admire many things about him; his intelligence, his rectitude, his honor, he was a great dad, but the one thing that I envy the most is the way he could adore my mom. She was perfect, anyone would have loved her, but his, his was something different, his entire heart used to beat only for her.’
He was so sweet, those memories were good memories and his face was so relaxed remembering this. ‘Did it hurt?’
He opened his eyes, and looked at me clueless.
‘What?’
‘Talking about them, did it hurt?’
He paused, analyzing what to say. ‘No, it’s weird, every time I’ve talked to you about them it feels…natural.’
I couldn’t have all the credit, he probably just never talked about them to anyone, so he was not used to it. ‘Maybe you have worked this out, maybe long ago you would have been able to talk about them, you just haven’t tried.’
His arm moved and I knew his hand was looking for my hand, any other time I would have avoided it, but he had just talked to me about a private, sensible matter, I couldn’t deny it to him.
‘You are making me weird Katherine.’
He kissed my hand and caressed my knuckles. His entire body was always firm and cold, but his hand was something different, just as his lips, those were his hot spots.
‘You are making me weird! I am laid in the street! You know how dirty this floor is?’
The corners of his mouth went up. ‘You better like it Katherine.’
‘And why is that?’
‘This is our floor, our spot, so you better get used to the dirt.’
We remained silent for a while, it was stupid and I was being such a girl but it was nice that he thought that this place he loved so much, was ours now. He remained with his eyes closed and I took advantage of it by studying him. He wasn´t asleep, he was just thinking, relaxed, something different for this guy.
He opened his eyes and checked his watch. I’ve never liked watches for myself, but I love men’s watches. His was perfect, just like him; really manly, elegant and chic.
‘It’s getting late, we have to go home to pick up some things ok?’
‘I am not fucking walking back.’ Yes I was being a sissy, but I was really tired and comfortable laying there with him.
‘Watch that mouth and you are walking. Max will drive us from my place to yours.’
He stood up and pulled me to him. We walked to his apartment hand in hand. I didn’t know what he was planning but apparently we were staying at my home for the night. We arrived at his place and he walked me to his room. I watched him while he took some clothes from his closet, his toothbrush and some other items and put them in a small suitcase. I noticed a tie and a handkerchief, maybe he was planning to stay ‘til Monday, not that he would check that with me, my opinion was not asked.
‘Let’s go home doll.’
He was nothing like his usual self, since that fierce kiss in my room that morning, he hadn’t made any similar approach, just nice, sweet, discreet interaction. Maybe he was really getting bored.
But then we arrived home. He kissed me the moment we entered, he trapped me against the door, kissing me while his hands pulled my hair and set me in place by my chin.
‘Wrap your legs.’
I complied and he kept kissing me. It will always surprise me how he could carry me so easily, I was sure I was heavy but he didn’t seem to notice. He laid me in bed, this was his usual choreography and I was learning it, I knew what to expect next. He was touching my ribs while kissing me, then his hand went up, but he didn’t stop on my boob, he went higher, putting my arm over my head, then the other.
‘Do you trust me?’
What? I want you, no this talking shit!
‘Yes.’
He smirked and took something from his jeans’ pocket with the hand that wasn’t gripping me. The tie I saw earlier. I gasped, I suspected quickly where this was going. It was a beautiful tie, I had seen it before, black with white tiny dots spread on it. I had nothing against the tie, but I liked to think I had an option to control at some point and this just erased that chance. I was starting to protest, but he kissed me in that dangerous way that just blanked my head.
Once my hands were tied he kept touching, he was making a huge demonstration of his touching skills since I couldn’t stop him and my boobs were pulled high with my arms over my head. Maybe this was not as bad as I had thought.
Just when I was thinking about it I noticed his hand was again in his pocket…the handkerchief. Black again and with white dots, though these were bigger dots. Where the fuck does that go?
‘Close your eyes.’
‘No fucking way, I am wearing mascara.’ I was not even kidding, I was losing all control here and I was freaking out.
‘Katherine. Close. Your. Eyes.’
He kissed me again, those rough kisses caused me to become undone. He tied the handkerchief over my eyes, blinding me completely. I didn’t like it, not a bit, control freaks don’t deal well with this kind of shit. I felt his hand roaming at my hips, getting under my blouse, touching my skin while kissing me. He pulled my blouse over and raised my head so the shirt got stocked over my arms. He kissed me again and then went to my jaw and neck, staying there for a while. My boobs came later, he was not removing my bra, just touching over it and kissing the skin that was visible.
While his mouth and one hand were there I felt his other hand on the top of my jeans, he began undoing them and taking them off. What underwear did I put on this morning? Think darling, think. Even when the shirt was white since the fabric was thick I wore a black cotton bra with black cotton boyshorts.
‘I like you in black, doll.’
He came back to my mouth, with my underwear on I didn’t feel as exposed as I should. His mouth started to go down, my throat, my chest, my ribs, my navel. Oh hell no! He’s not going down there! I would never let him go down there, I was too self-conscious to let him go to that place with his mo
uth! He was just in my navel, but I could see what was happening so I moved to stop him.
My breathing came back when I felt him moving to my mouth again, he kissed me, giving my heart a rest.
‘Katherine, if you move, I have to start again and I will do it as many times as necessary, ok?’ His voice was so hot that I was having difficulties getting one straight thought.
‘I just, don’t’
He kissed me again, stopping me from expressing my concerns. He started the game over. He was stupid if he thought for a minute that him starting again would make me mad, I was a sucker for his kisses, I would have him doing it over and over again for the entire night.
This time I felt his finger entering my bra cup and pushing my boobs out, he wasn’t able to take my bra off but he was kissing my nipples now. Melting, melting, melting. His hands all over my legs, ribs, face. This time it was when he was kissing my hip bone when I moved again. There was no way I would allow him to kiss me there!
‘Not making it easy Katherine.’
He started again, but this time I kind of understood his reasoning, I was getting frustrated. I was enchanted with the attention all over my body but there was this important part that needed friction and wasn’t receiving it. Again, he did something different this time. While he was on my breast he started removing my boyshorts. Fuck! I was feeling so exposed, but his face was glued to my body, so there was no way he was staring at that! You can’t even name it! Lame!
Blue Eyes was on my navel and both of his hands went to my hips, keeping me in place. This was embarrassing, he was close enough to notice how wet I was and that was the most private thing I could think of. He started opening my legs with his knee, he is so going to see how you look down there! I started to talk to stop him. But he whispered to the skin on my hips.
‘If you don’t shut up now, I am going to tie your shirt over your mouth, Katherine.’
Fuck! Many thoughts came to my mind, standing up to stop him, telling him to stop, kicking him with my legs; many things, but all of them would end up with him stopping and I was so turned on by then that I needed some relief.
My thoughts were interrupted by a weird sensation. He was there, his mouth was there, he started slowly, kissing, slightly opening his mouth letting his tongue touch me a little, gradually I felt more and more tongue, until he was licking with no shame. More tongue, more tongue, tongue in an entrance, something building inside me, tongue in my happy spot, tongue back at the entrance, tongue slightly entering, tongue in my happy spot, finger in my entrance! I wasn’t aware but I was making these breathless noises. This is toooo much!
BLUE ICE (ICE SERIES) Page 17