When Nature Calls, Hang Up!

by Robin Mellom

“Hold up!” Mr. Skeely held up his giant folktale palm. “Marty was first last time. So the last person last time will go first this time.”

  Somehow that all happened to make sense, and the entire school turned around to look at Cindy. She had just busted through the doors.

  “I’M HERE. I MADE IT!” She strutted right up in front of Marty.

  “Where were you?” he whispered over her shoulder.

  “Feeding Lucy,” she said out of the side of her mouth. “She seemed happy that your bag said fancy, so I set it down and rushed out, making sure she didn’t follow me down here.” Cindy grabbed her plate, looked left and right to make sure no one else was listening, and turned to him. “It wasn’t easy, though—I even formed a sweat bead. Oh my goodness, is my hair okay?”

  Marty wasn’t sure what to say, since her hair always looked okay. “It always looks okay.”

  “Aww, that’s sweet!” She beamed.

  He’d said the right thing.

  But during this sweet conversation in which Marty was saying all the right things, Cindy—having not memorized Skeely’s New & Improved Flowchart—accidentally flowed in the wrong direction. Marty didn’t even realize it.

  Within mere moments, Cindy had caused a full-school pileup.

  In the chaos, Trevor noticed Libby had kept her cool and was still taking notes and measurements to get prepared for the social. “You sure are focused,” Trevor said to her.

  She nodded and quickly measured a table. “Some ideas are coming to me. They’re vague ideas, but they’re ideas. Okay, I have one idea.” She looked up and lifted a brow. “But more importantly, how did things go with Corey today? Is he boyfriend material? I need your thoughts on this, Trev.”

  He didn’t have any—not just yet. It was possible that Corey had tricked him with the grizzly bear track. But he couldn’t prove that. And after thinking it through, he realized Corey hadn’t actually done anything horrible to him that day. But he hadn’t gone through a night yet, so his opinion was still in the forming stage.

  “I’ll let you know in the morning, Lib. You know…if I’m alive.”

  She smirked at him. “You know how you’ll stay alive?”

  There was a twinkle in her eye. And he needed to get to the bottom of that twinkle. (If twinkles have bottoms, that is.) “How?”

  “By focusing on Molly Decker and making that girl smile.” She winked at him. “That way you’ll keep your mind busy, and your body won’t die. That sounded weird, but you know what I mean.”

  He nodded as he watched Libby skip around helping people who were still on the floor because of Cindy’s pileup.

  “LISTEN UP!” Skeely howled. “No one is flowing in the right direction. Yes, it is Cindy’s fault, but she has apologized and blamed it on the fact that she is so short. I have no idea what it’s like to be short, so I can’t even imagine how challenging her life must be. But I must add that someone—one person in particular—snatched a fork before grabbing a napkin. This has turned into a disaster. And now you are to eat your meal in silence. No talking!”

  Who was the idiot who grabbed a fork first? Trevor thought.

  Silence fell over the room. All you could hear was the scraping of wood chairs against the wood floors as everyone sat down to eat their Tuna Casserole Surprise in silence.

  Whew. At least I’m not the one who caused us to get in trouble, Trevor thought.

  But that’s when he looked down at his fork. Suddenly he remembered…he had grabbed a fork first. Trevor looked to his right to see that Skeely was eyeballing him from across the room.

  I’m the idiot. Should’ve seen that one coming.

  But then when he looked to his left, he saw Molly, three tables down, sneaking glances at him. Her hand covered her mouth, and her shoulders lifted up and down.

  Molly was laughing?

  She then coughed and turned away.

  But Molly’s almost-giggle did not go unnoticed. Trevor now knew there was a possible way to get Molly to smile huge. All that was required was doing something embarrassing in front of everyone.

  Easy, Trevor thought. Slam dunk.

  Yeah, it’s super neat and all that the Jolly Green Giant didn’t get me in trouble for causing that all-school pileup. But that doesn’t mean my life hasn’t turned into a DISASTER.

  I tried to eat my Tuna Casserole Surprise next to Savannah Maxwell, but she glared at me and left the table. So if you’re following along, that means she left me there ALL ALONE. True, there were seven other people at the table, but essentially I was left alone in the wilderness to fend for myself.

  I kept promising her that I’d get back to the room as soon as possible to decorate her bed, but there’s just so much programming at this camp that they don’t give you a moment to breathe or rest or sneak food to a cat.

  I’m just glad I have Lucy to cuddle up with. She’s making this nightmare tolerable with all her cuteness. Everyone should pack a stowaway kitty. I highly recommend it.

  THE STUDENTS WERE GIVEN A few minutes to rush back to their cabins to get ready for the evening social. When Libby entered the cabin, she saw Savannah calmly gathering party items.

  “So…” Libby said as she casually folded and refolded the cuff on her sleeve, “…do you need any help tonight?”

  “Nope.” Savannah packed and stacked and twirled around to face her. “All ready. It should be a blast.” As she strutted out of the cabin, she glanced back over her shoulder and said, “Can’t wait to see what you have planned, Libby. And get my bed decorated, Cindy!”

  “I’m on it—I promise!” Cindy said while upside-down, looking under a bed.

  Libby flopped down on her bed. She stared up at the bottom of the top bunk, hoping some answers were hidden there. She had an idea for her social, but what if it wasn’t nearly as sparkly as what Savannah had planned? She sighed and said, “Cindy, why are you staring under my bed and not decorating Savannah’s?”

  She popped her head up next to Libby. “Me? I’m not looking for anything. But I was just wondering…have you seen any skunks in our cabin?”

  Libby sat up straight and grabbed her blanket. “Skunks? In here?!”

  “Calm down. There are no skunks in our cabin, of course.” Cindy nervously twirled her hair. She realized that having Lucy in the cabin could cause big trouble. As much as she wanted to have her kitty nearby, she was going to have to put her bedding and food outside behind the cabin. As long as there was fancy food nearby, Lucy wouldn’t travel far.

  The other girls rushed into the cabin, flittering about as they changed their clothes and quickly got ready for the social, then rushed back out in a flurry. Cindy looked around and realized she was left with only Libby—who was staring at a list in her notebook—and Molly, who was staring down at her boots.

  “What is wrong with you people? There’s a fantastic social about to start.” Cindy pointed to the door. “Why aren’t you girls rushing down there?”

  Molly folded her arms. “Anything with the word social in it is something I’d like to stay far away from. What’s your excuse?”

  “I promised Savannah I’d decorate her bed. I have to get that done first.” Cindy then turned to face Libby. “Why aren’t you heading down there, Ms. Class President?”

  Libby sighed. “I’m sure Savannah has planned something adorable and extravagant, and there’s no way I’ll be able to follow anything she does.”

  “Are you kidding?” Molly said as she marched up to Libby. “I saw her putting up the decorations earlier. They’re ridiculous. Trust me, you have nothing to worry about. Come on.” Molly then grabbed Libby by the arm and pulled her out of the cabin.

  “Toodles!” Cindy called out after them as they headed down the trail, Molly dragging Libby alongside her.

  Perfect, Cindy thought. Now I can get Lucy all super comfy in her new bed outside and still have time to decorate Savannah’s bed!

  But by the time she had moved Lucy’s bed outside and “fancified” it with beautiful
foliage and flowers and ribbons, she’d run out of time. She had to put off decorating Savannah’s bed until later—yet again.

  Libby and Molly arrived in the dining hall, and Libby’s mouth dropped.

  “See? I told you,” Molly said. “It’s ridiculous, right?”

  “These are all my ideas. A corner for Pictionary, pin the tail on the bear, a Jenga tournament. These are all things I’d thought of! I mean, I had a list of a lot of things in my head, but I can’t believe she thought of these, too!”

  Molly shrugged. “No offense, but they’re pretty bad ideas. Don’t you think it’s kind of cool that Savannah is the one who has to take credit for this dumb party?”

  Libby’s eyes teared up. “I know you’re being nice, but it also kind of hurts.”

  Molly patted Libby on the shoulder. “You’ll come up with something better. You always do, Libby. I’ve never met someone with so many problem-solving skills. Seriously, you’re ready to run Congress or something.”

  She turned to Molly, wiping a tear from her eye. “Thanks. That’s probably the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me. It’s interesting how you can say something sort of mean and then follow it up with something sort of wonderful.” She patted Molly’s shoulder. “I like that about you.”

  Molly bit at her lip because she didn’t like the feeling welling up inside her. Maybe Trevor wasn’t the only one she was going to miss at this school. She looked down at the floor and said, “I’m going to the bathroom.” Then she bolted out of there before she showed any more stupid emotions.

  But just as she got to the door, she heard, “Molly! I’m glad you liked that dead potato bug.” It was Trevor.

  “Yeah, I liked it.”

  He motioned toward the party. “Wanna go play Pictionary with me?”

  She realized they were away from the group. No one could hear them. It would be the perfect time to tell him she was moving. So she took a deep breath and looked up at him. “I have something I need to tell you.”

  “Before or after Pictionary?”

  “Now.”

  He stepped closer to her and smiled. The fact that Molly wanted to talk about something meant that she was softening up. Sharing emotions. Not being so miserable! And that meant, of course, that he was that much closer to getting her to smile like crazy. “Tell me anything. Just lay it on me!”

  But Molly studied his face—his smile, his bright eyes. It was obvious he thought she was about to say something good.

  Not something devastating.

  There was a whole other day left at Whispering Pines. So Molly decided now was not the time. Ruining this trip was never what she intended to do.

  She fidgeted with her jacket. “Let’s do pin the tail on the bear instead. It might actually be fun.”

  Trevor’s eyes grew big. “Really? That’s so positive of you!”

  She shrugged. “I’ll give it a shot.” The two of them headed back into the dining hall, and that’s when they saw Libby and Savannah in the corner talking.

  Voices were raised.

  Hands were flying.

  Oh, no, Trevor thought. Whenever Libby’s hands flail like that, it means things are about to fall apart.

  ALL I asked her was how she figured out what I was planning, and she went all berserk, saying there are LOTS of ideas and it’s not like she stole them.

  I told her I never accused her of stealing them and blah, blah, blah…we ended the conversation in a dare. That’s probably normal between two class presidents, right?

  [laughs nervously]

  [clears throat]

  She dared me to give a better party than she did.

  WHAT ARE WE, FIVE?

  I didn’t tell her that I’d already dared myself to throw a better party. Except it isn’t going to be easy, because the only idea of mine she DIDN’T think of was Literary Limbo. It was the only one left on my list.

  But now I’m wondering if that idea is lame, too. I know Molly thinks that I’ll come up with something else amazing, but I’ve been trying to do everything possible to loosen up my creative side.

  I’ve taken a long shower.

  Walked by myself in the woods.

  Even did a headstand.

  But nothing—no unique ideas have jostled out!

  [looks down]

  I guess it should make me feel better that everyone seemed to have a decent enough time at Savannah’s social tonight. If I’d gone first, they would’ve been happy at MY social.

  Though, I have to admit…they were having a decent time but not a GREAT time.

  [looks up, twinkle in her eye]

  Which means there’s a chance that I could come up with something better. So I need to get going. Time for another headstand!

  I’m not sure about that Libby girl. She’s never done anything for ME. It’s like she thinks she can pull off this whole “Amazing Class President” thing without even shadowing me and asking for advice or borrowing clothes. This entire year, she’s been making decisions all by herself. I’m tired of it!!

  So, yes. I challenged her to a dare. I figured it was the proper way to handle the situation.

  [checks her fingernails]

  I’m sophisticated like that. Wow, these nails are chipped. Nice weather is so brutal on the nails sometimes.

  I’ll get Cindy to touch them up. THAT girl knows how to be a shadow. It’s possible I’ll take her on as a protégé. But I’ll wait to see how my bed decorations turned out first.

  I’m not sure I’d call Savannah’s party a success. She made a lot of safe choices. Pictionary? Yes. Jenga? Sure. All good ideas, but they are the obvious ones. I guess I was just hoping for a twist. Like the kind you find in good movies. Or interesting food.

  Something unusual!

  I studied the students, and there were some smiles, but I recorded no one laughing out loud or even grinning widely. So I’ll be looking forward to what Libby has in store for us tomorrow night.

  Let’s hope she can figure out a twist.

  THE STUDENTS GATHERED AROUND THE roaring fire as Tad and Miss Plimp happily greeted them and said things with exclamation points.

  “Get warm!”

  “Let’s have fun!!”

  “There will be s’mores!!!”

  “Time for campfire songs!!!!”

  Tad stood up and got the students’ attention. “It’s time to sing a camp favorite, ‘On Top of Spaghetti’!” The lyrics were highly tolerable to a group of middle school students, and within just a couple of lines, they were all belting out the words.

  On top of spaghetti,

  all covered with cheese,

  I lost my poor meatball,

  when somebody sneezed.

  It rolled off the table,

  and onto the floor,

  and then my poor meatball,

  rolled out of the door.…

  When the class got to the second round of the song, everyone—even Corey—was up on their feet, singing and waving their hands around wildly.

  Vice Principal Decker was on the outside of the group, waving his hands around in support. Trevor couldn’t help but jump up and join in, too.

  And strangely enough, he found himself having fun.

  But when he glanced over at Molly, she had her hoodie pulled tight around her head. No smile, no laugh. No reaction at all, actually. It was almost as if she didn’t even care what was going on around her.

  Something’s wrong, Trevor thought. She’s not usually in THIS bad of a mood.

  As soon as the singing was over, Miss Plimp announced it was time to cook up s’mores. The students all scattered in different lines to pick up their ingredients, but Trevor lingered, looking for Molly.

  He didn’t have to look very hard. Molly had already spotted him. “Come over here,” she said as she motioned for him to follow her to the side.

  She plopped down on a log bench and patted the spot next to her. “Sit down. We need to talk.”

  Trevor cautiously sat down. This was all pre
tty weird. He couldn’t remember a time when Molly had initiated a conversation. And certainly not one that involved the sentence We need to talk. Trevor glanced her way. “What’s wrong? Was it that spaghetti song?”

  “No.”

  “My voice. You hate my singing voice.”

  “No, Trevor.”

  “When I stood up and waved my hands around, I looked like a Muppet. Is that it?”

  She smirked. “No.”

  “A dorky Muppet?”

  She laughed, then quickly coughed to cover it up.

  “Aha! I almost made you smile, Molly Decker! This quest of mine may be more difficult than The Hobbit, but I will succeed.”

  Molly looked over at him and flinched when she saw his face.

  Excitement.

  He was truly excited about making her smile.

  It hit her that she had never had a friend like Trevor before. And maybe she never would again. So the thought of telling him she was moving away hurt her insides more than she could bear.

  “So…what’d you need to talk to me about?” he asked.

  Molly pulled her hoodie over her head. “It’s true—you looked like a Muppet.”

  “You pulled me over here to tell me that?”

  “No.” Then she jumped up and ran off without saying another word.

  For the rest of the campfire, Molly sat on the opposite side of the group from Trevor. With her hoodie pulled tight, he couldn’t even see a silhouette of her face.

  “What did I do wrong?” Trevor grumbled to himself as he roasted a marshmallow. This is the second time she’s told me we need to talk, but she won’t talk! What should I say to her…aww, dang it.

  He’d burned his marshmallow, so he tossed it into the fire. He didn’t even stay to watch it turn into a molten lava burst of marshmallow awesome. Instead, he sat back down on a log, sank his chin into his palm, and thought through all the possible ways he could make Molly happy again.

  The problem was that he couldn’t think of a way—not a single idea.

  “Time for a ghost story!” Miss Plimp announced.