by Adrian Birch
“Where’s Lindsay?” I looked around the granary. “Where’s his son?”
“They’re in the silo with the others,” Ian said.
He stepped behind me and put his hands on my shoulders, trying to calm me down.
“Ashley,” he whispered, “Lindsay agreed with Chris about giving him the gun. We put her and the kid in the silo before he did it. Mrs. Thomas is taking care of her. Lindsay seems pretty tough. She’s handling it. The kid’s too young to know what happened.”
I turned from Bryce’s corpse and pulled away from Ian.
“Just sit down for a minute,” Ian said, pulling back the chair at Chris’s desk.
I sat, but I was afraid Ian wasn’t acting with enough urgency. It was only a matter of time before the Home Guard discovered the granary, especially if other people already knew about it. They even had a name for the meager resistance movement; they’d called it the Underground, as if everyone already knew exactly what that meant. Somehow word was getting out that we were sheltering positives here.
“We can’t stay here,” I said. “They’ll find us. They’re going to search the whole ranch.”
“No, we can’t stay here. You’re right.” Ian looked totally at a loss. “But where else can we go? I didn’t count on having this many people. I was going to drive around looking for an empty house—maybe someplace the Home Guard has registered as unoccupied—but finding something like that could take days.” He glanced at me, chagrinned. “I know we don’t have days, Ash. I’m trying to figure something out. I just need a little time to fucking think about the right place to hide. Because, I’m sorry, but I haven’t come up with anything.”
An idea that had been floating around my consciousness since last evening suddenly surfaced.
I knew of a place where we could hide—maybe.
The place I had in mind would take the Home Guard months to find, if they ever found it at all. And it was a place where we could take all of the refugees who were in the silo. Maybe even more.
The problem was, I didn’t know where it was. Not exactly.
I would have to ask my dad.
But most importantly, wherever we went, we would need a supply of antibiotics. Even the most secure refugee hideout in the world would be mostly useless if we didn’t have a way to keep positives from progressing to the disease’s later stages.
I stood up and faced Ian squarely.
“I need to borrow your gun.”
“Wait, what?” He was confused. “Why?”
“I’m going back to the house,” I said firmly. “I’m going to get the pharmacy access card from Jason.”
“You can’t be serious.” Ian looked more frustrated now than I’d ever seen him. He was so upset it looked like he thought I’d betrayed him. “You’re out of your fucking mind! That plan’s over now, Ashley! Forget it! They’ll have warrants for our arrest. Shawn wasn’t bluffing about that. They’ll arrest you on the spot. They might even shoot you on the spot. There’s no way you or I can go back to the house now. You’re being reckless! We have to be realistic.”
“Ian, listen to me.” I did my best to keep my cool and speak as reasonably and forcefully as possible. “You want me to be realistic? Here’s realistic. There’s no other way. If we need more antibiotics, we need that access card. And I’m the only one who has a chance of getting it from Jason.”
Ian looked at me pleadingly. “I’m not letting you do this. Ashley, listen to me.” He whispered, “I don’t know what I would do if I lost you. Do you understand? I can’t lose you.”
Ian put his arms around my shoulders and drew me close, pressing my head against his chest. I felt like I might cry, but I forced myself not to.
I slipped my hands around his waist.
Then I grabbed his gun from his belt and pulled away from him.
“You’re not going to lose me,” I said. “Ian, that’s why I have to do this.”
I ran out the door before he could stop me, then sprinted up the riverbank, clutching Ian’s gun, careful to keep under the cover of the trees.
* * *
The Home Guard was already at the house when I got there. From the riverbank, I could see Jason’s military vehicle parked in the driveway.
I snuck toward the back of the house. On the way up the river, I’d hastily constructed a plan for getting Jason alone. I couldn’t go inside without anyone else seeing me. My only chance was to wait outside the bathroom window and hope I could catch him using it. It was risky, I knew. But there wasn’t any other way.
An old, overgrown lilac bush stood just outside the house’s downstairs bathroom window. Luckily, it still had most of its leaves. I crawled between it and the house, crouching just below the windowsill. I was pretty sure no one would see me hiding there.
My mom had cooked lunch again for the Home Guard. I could smell her beef stew.
The rangers’ voices droned on while they ate in the kitchen. Occasionally, I heard my mom’s voice pipe up, and I could hear Jason’s voice, too, along with Shawn’s, but I couldn’t make out anything that anyone was saying.
So far, my plan was on track because Jason’s squad had actually stopped for lunch, as I’d hoped they would. They had to know we were missing by now, but luckily they weren’t rushing off to find us, like I’d worried they might do. The squad was taking its time eating. But for everything to work like I’d planned, a lot more still had to go my way. First of all, Jason had to use the bathroom before he left, and I had no idea how likely it was that he actually would.
I don’t know how long I waited until someone finally came to use the bathroom. Whoever it was opened the window right away. The sash slid up right above my head. I held my breath. I didn’t move.
I heard someone peeing. By the sound of the urine hitting the bowl, I could tell it was a guy.
I couldn’t show myself unless I knew for sure it was Jason. But that was the problem. To look through the window I would have to expose myself for a moment, showing my face before ducking back down. If it was Shawn who was peeing right now, or anyone but Jason who saw me through the window, I’d be arrested. Maybe shot.
I took a deep, quiet breath. I didn’t have much time. I would have to look quickly, before whoever it was finished peeing and while he still had his back to me.
I started counting down, poised to raise my head and duck as quickly as possible.
Three… Two…
Suddenly, whoever was in the bathroom coughed and spit through the window. A mass of saliva and phlegm shot into the lilac bush, attached itself to a branch, and dripped down the bark.
Just from the sound of the cough alone, I knew it was Shawn, not Jason. I’d lived with him for a long time. I was sure it was him. If I’d raised my head a moment earlier, he would have seen me.
I held my breath.
I heard him grumbling and gasping as he struggled to wash his shot and bandaged hand.
Then he left.
Another fifteen minutes passed, and I heard the rangers saying good-bye to my mom.
Shit.
Jason hadn’t gone to the bathroom. Fuck him and his fucking big-ass bladder.
But just when I started to crawl from beneath the window, someone hurried into the bathroom. Instantly I heard a heavy stream of piss churning into the toilet bowl.
I didn’t waste any time. I peeked quickly through the window and ducked back down.
It was Jason. I could only see the back of his head, but I was sure it was him.
I stood quietly, raised the gun, and pointed it through the window directly at him.
As soon as he was done peeing, just as he was zipping up, I whispered, “Those pills you gave me were fucking incredible.”
His head snapped around. His eyes met mine, startled.
I said, “You draw your gun, I’ll shoot you.”
He smiled coolly. “Well, well, well. There you are. Ashley, if you shoot me, my whole squad’ll be on you in seconds flat. But I won’t draw. Not just yet. I l
ike you.” He turned and approached the window, stepping confidently toward my gun’s barrel. He planted his hands on the sill. “You liked those pills? Fucking good, aren’t they? And now you want more.”
“You got any?”
“Not on me right now.” He laughed softly. “Jesus. What makes you think I’d give any more to you, anyway? You’re a wanted fugitive. I have the go-ahead to shoot you on sight. Did you know that? Your husband’s ready to skin your hide. He wouldn’t fuck you with a rubber on a ten-foot pole.”
“And what about you?” I asked. “How do you feel about this whole situation? You haven’t shot me yet.”
“No,” he said, smiling. “No, I haven’t, have I?” He spoke softly, bringing his face closer to mine. “I don’t like to be rash. After all, there’s such a thing as protection. Besides, you came to say hello to me, didn’t you? That was a very friendly thing to do. You must like me after all.”
“Well,” I said, forcing myself to smile coyly while keeping my gun raised. “You’re the sergeant,” I leaned forward and whispered into his ear. “Out of all these privates, I hear you have the biggest gun. And you like to party. What’s not to like?”
“I knew you liked to party!” Jason slapped his hand on the sill like he’d just won the lottery. “I knew it. I saw you that night at the fair, and I knew you liked getting fucked up. Why’ve you been holding out on me, Ashley?”
I pouted. “Well, my marriage isn’t exactly working out, is it?” I tried not to ham it up too much. I was pretty sure I had him, and I didn’t want to ruin it now. “It’s just getting kind of boring out here on the run,” I said carefully. “And I’m getting lonely. How soon can you get some more of those pills? I thought maybe we could hook up later tonight. They give you time off, don’t they?”
“Ashley, I’m the sergeant.” Jason’s tone was brimming with smug confidence. “I can take time off whenever the fuck I want.”
“And you can get more of those pills whenever the fuck you want, too?”
“I can get them. You fucking bet I can get them. I’ll get you some that are even better than those last ones.” He smiled. “As long as you share.”
I smiled back at him. “If you can get them,” I whispered, “oh, I’ll share all right. I’ll be at your house at eleven tonight then? You’ll be there? You better be there.”
“Whoa, whoa, Ash,” Jason said. “No. Not there. If you want me to keep all this on the down low and not arrest or shoot your tight little ass, you can’t be anywhere near my house. If anyone found out about this, I’d be fucked. Got that? If I’m doing you a favor by not turning you in and hooking you up, then we gotta do this how I say.”
“Where then?” I braced myself. I thought I’d had him, but now I wasn’t so sure.
What was I getting myself into?
“That bend in the highway,” he said, gesturing out beyond the barn. “Just past this place. Do you know where I mean? Where that little gully is? You just hang tight there tonight, and I’ll pick you up. Got it?”
I knew the place he meant. I also knew that getting into any kind of vehicle with Jason was a bad idea. I’d imagined dropping in on his shitty little house and finding him already halfway wasted by the time I got there. I’d even planned on asking Ian to hide outside in the dark in case anything went wrong. Driving around alone with Jason was completely different. He could take me anywhere he wanted, and nobody would be there to back me up.
But what else could I do? It was this or nothing.
I grabbed his collar and whispered, “I’ll be there at eleven. Don’t be late.”
As soon as Jason’s military vehicle drove away and I was sure all the rangers in his squad were gone, I slipped out to the feed shed.
I couldn’t risk going inside the house. I had no idea what my mom or Danielle would do if they saw me. After this morning, I wouldn’t have been surprised if they turned me in. And I didn’t even know if Shawn was still there or not, nursing his wound.
But I knew my dad would help me if he could. He always fed his cattle before sundown; he did the same thing without fail every day of his life. If I waited for him at the feed shed long enough, I was sure he’d show up eventually.
I also knew that I’d bought us all some time at the granary. As long as Jason was planning on partying with me, he wasn’t going to look very hard for anybody on my parents’ property. No matter how hard Shawn pushed him to find us, Jason was the boss. And I knew he’d much rather sleep with me than shoot me, given the options.
I lay down in the hay scattered all over the feed shed. The cattle were already milling around, waiting for my dad to feed them.
It was quiet here, and peaceful. It reminded me of when I was a kid and I used to help my dad feed his cattle. The scent of the fresh hay was sweet and rich, and it filled my lungs as I breathed in the air. It almost felt like nothing had changed. No pathogen, no quarantine. Just my dad’s feed shed filled with hay, like always.
I must have fallen asleep, because when I woke up, the sun was setting.
My dad was tossing loose hay into the troughs, and the cattle were chewing lazily. He hadn’t even seen me asleep in the dark corner of the shed.
“Dad,” I whispered.
He turned around, startled.
“It’s me,” I said. “It’s okay.”
I stepped from the shadows. When my dad set eyes on me, he looked incredibly relieved. He gave me a long, tight hug. He even lifted me from the ground a little, like he used to do when I was little.
“My Ashley,” he said. “I’m so glad you’re okay. You have no idea how worried I’ve been about you.” He hugged me again. “The world’s gone to hell, hasn’t it?” he said softly. “What are we all going to do?”
“Well, I’m not going to stand around doing nothing,” I said. “That’s for sure.”
My dad looked at me warily. I could tell he was worried that I’d get hurt, or worse.
“I need your help,” I said.
“My help? How?”
“I need you to tell me something.” I was sure no one else was around, but I lowered my voice. “You remember when I was a kid and we took that cross-country horseback-riding trip? Way out in the mountains? And we found those ruins? That village carved in the rock? And you told me not to ever tell anyone about it?”
My dad looked around the feed shed. He craned his head to look out the window.
“I don’t remember anything like that,” he said. “What are you talking about? That’s ridiculous, this far north. The Anasazi never set foot past southern Colorado.”
“Dad.” I couldn’t help but laugh a little. He was serious about keeping this a secret. “It’s okay, no one can hear us. We’re alone. I need you to tell me where those cliff dwellings are. It’s important. People’s lives are at stake. I can’t tell you why, but they are. You told me once that the Anasazi built those dwellings way out there to hide from a brutal enemy. Now I need to hide just like they did. Do you understand? And I have no idea how to get there.”
My dad sighed. He glanced out the feed-shed window one last time.
“Does Ian know about this?” he asked.
“No,” I whispered. “Not yet. But he needs a place to hide as badly as I do.”
My dad nodded. “And if you went out there, he’d go with you?”
I nodded. “Yes.”
“Good,” he said.
He turned to leave the feed shed. It was almost dark.
“Stay here,” he said.
In fifteen minutes he came back with a Ziploc bag. Inside was a black garbage bag folded neatly into sections.
He removed it from the Ziploc bag and unfolded it. Inside was a topographical map. My dad unfolded the map’s sections, then pointed to a tiny, penciled-in X. He tapped it with his finger. Then he wrapped the map back up in the bags and handed it to me.
Suddenly, a scream came from the house.
My dad looked at me for a moment, confused, before we both ran toward the lit back
porch.
I did my best to stuff the map into the back of my pants as we ran. I didn’t have anywhere else to put it. When we neared the porch, there was another scream.
“Get off!”
It was Tyler’s voice, I realized.
I could see a commotion through the dim screen window that lead to the washroom, but I couldn’t make out anything but shadows.
“Get off!” Tyler shouted again in a terrified panic.
It was only after hearing Tyler’s terrified scream that I remembered the moment I’d left Morgan asleep in the silo. I’d heard Bryce’s gunshot and rushed straight to the granary.
And I’d left without locking the door.
I had no choice but to rush to the house. I had to risk being seen by my mom and Danielle, and even Shawn.
When I reached the washroom, I saw exactly what I’d feared, but it was even worse than I’d imagined.
Tyler’s pants were around his ankles and Morgan was completely naked. Her legs were locked around Tyler’s waist. Her arms were locked around his neck. He’d fallen onto his back against a pile of muddy boots, and Morgan’s pelvis was grinding away furiously as she perched on top of him. She was starting to moan.
They’d obviously been having sex. They still were.
“I’m so sorry,” Tyler cried, pushing at Morgan without budging her. Tears were streaming down his cheeks. “I’m so sorry! I couldn’t help it! I couldn’t help it! Now she won’t stop!”
I understood exactly what must have happened. Without another dose of antibiotics, Morgan’s infection had progressed. Maybe even as far as stage three. Without being locked inside the silo, she’d wandered to the house in a sex-crazed stupor. Tyler must have been the first person she’d seen. She’d stripped her clothes. She must have been saturated with pheromones. Even now I could feel a strange, lustful dizziness. Tyler hadn’t stood a chance. He was just a fourteen-year-old kid who was full of his own adolescent hormones already. He’d probably let Morgan seduce him, then screamed out when he realized that he couldn’t get her off of him.
I rushed to the floor and tried to pull Morgan away. I couldn’t believe her strength. Her legs and arms were locked so tightly around Tyler that I couldn’t even budge them. The rigidity of her muscles must have been some strange effect of the pathogen.