"Wh-what are you going to do?" she asked, hoping the question didn't sound as staged to Nancy as it did to her. There wasn't time to think too much about it, wasn't time to calculate the risks and formulate a plan of action. She needed to act now while she still had a chance. Slowly, she lifted the binoculars and rested them on the counter. "What do you mean I'm going to miss the broadcast?."
"Oh, Kristin, please," Nancy said, tossing her head back with a laugh. "I realize you're surprised but surely you can figure that one out."
Kristin moved the moment Nancy laughed, slipping the binoculars onto the counter in front of the radio, blocking Nancy's view.
"Oh, I think I know," she said, slipping her hand over the radio. "I guess I just want to hear you say it."
"What? Is that supposed to make me feel bad?" Nancy asked, glancing down at the gun in her hand.
The instant Nancy's gaze dropped, Kristin's fingers closed around the radio and she slid it off the counter and into the palm of her hand.
"Nancy, I can't believe this," she said in a loud voice, her finger depressing the transmit button down so tightly it threatened to shut off all feeling. She only prayed that Jake was in radio range, that he would hear them before Nancy discovered exactly what she was doing. "Please, Nancy, please, won't you put the gun down?"
"Put it down? Why would I want to do that? I finally got your undivided attention." She lifted the gun, making a dramatic play of examining it, turning it in all directions and letting it catch the light. "You know, it's so amazing how people who have no time for you suddenly find all the time in the world when you have one of these things in your hand."
"Nancy, put it down," Kristin said again in as loud a voice as she dared. She had to resist the almost over-whelming desire to scream for help, knowing it would only made matters worse—and serve little purpose in this secluded spot. Nancy was relatively calm at the moment and it was important that she stay that way. But Kristin had worked with too many unstable personalities to know that violence could escalate at the drop of a hat. "Before someone gets hurt."
"Too late," Nancy laughed. "Someone has already gotten hurt, have you forgotten about that? I would think you'd be feeling rather guilty about it now." She took several steps closer, waving the gun as she spoke. "Since it was all your fault!"
Kristin felt an icy chill make its way down her spine. "You hurt Tori, how could you do that?"
An almost undetectable shadow passed across Nancy's animated expression, so brief she would have missed it had she not been looking right at her. But it was enough to give her hope. Somewhere in Nancy's troubled mind, a fragment of reason must still exist, a sliver of reality that could still distinguish between right and wrong.
"Tori was unfortunate," Nancy admitted with a dramatic shrug, nothing in her expression now except an unsettling mask that bore little resemblance to the person Kristin knew. "I admit it. She was in the wrong place at the wrong time. Which just goes to show you what happens when you trust someone to do something for you. No matter how much information you give them, no matter how many details you supply, they still screw it up." She shrugged, then leveled the gun again. "Which just goes to prove if you want a job done right, you have to do it yourself."
Kristin's head was spinning and she struggled to maintain control. Reality had become too unreal, too surreal. Surely she was going to awaken to discover this was all just a dream—a horrible, awful dream that made no sense at all.
Only, the knot of terror in her stomach was enough to convince her this was no dream. What was happening was all too real, frighteningly real. The deeply disturbed woman looking at her with such hatred in her eyes was not the Nancy Fox she knew, not the colleague and partner she had worked with for years. This woman was a stranger and she was dangerous.
Kristin tried not to think about how vulnerable she was, how isolated and alone, relying instead on her experience and her years of work dealing with a variety of irrational and volatile personalities to guide her. The only way she was going to survive, the only chance she had would be to keep her head and not panic.
She clutched the radio in her hand again. The feeling was gone from her fingers now but she had to keep the transmission open. Jake had to hear her, he just had to and she had to hold on until he did.
"It was you then, Nancy?" she asked in a calm, practiced tone that came from years of experience. "All this time, it was you? The telephone calls, the letters?"
"Oh, I admit, I had help. After all, I could hardly go all over the country myself making telephone calls and mailing letters, could I?" she asked with a shrug. "My little helper is so fond of me, you know. But men, they're such corruptible creatures. We women can talk them into doing anything, can't we?" She arched an eyebrow. "But then, you already know that, don't you? I must say, it didn't take you long to wrap that big, strong brute of a forest ranger around your little finger. The poor man can't seem to keep his hands off you, can he?" Kristin started to open her mouth to speak but Nancy waved her silent. "Oh yes, I've seen the two of you together—those longing looks, the embraces, the kisses. It's enough to make a girl blush." She made a gesture, pointing to the expanse of windows. "Be careful what you do in front of an open window, even if you are in the middle of nowhere. You never know who might be watching."
The thought that Nancy had been watching them sent another rattling down Kristin's spine. "I don't understand, Nancy, why? After all these years we've known each other, all the years we've worked together. Why would you do something like this?"
But something had already sparked in her memory, something she had filed away in the back of her brain but now flashed to consciousness again. It had seemed so innocent at the time, so insignificant, but remembering it now shed a completely different light on things.
It had happened after a broadcast one night. Nancy had been a guest on the program, chatting with callers and answering their questions as the Sly Fox. After the show, Dale had complimented her on what a natural she had been at the microphone. Nancy had laughed and jokingly said that if the "Fox" was really sly, she'd get rid of Jane and take over the program herself.
"Why?" Nancy snorted. "Why do you think? Are you so arrogant that you think I like sitting on the sidelines and watching while everything works out for you, while everyone raves about Dear Jane and I'm just there to take up the slack? I'm tired of being the second-string Kristin, tired of being in your shadow."
"You're not in my shadow, Nancy, you never have been."
"No?" She threw her head back and laughed, another wild, ferocious sound that spoke more of madness than humor. "Then maybe you should talk to your bosses about that."
Kristin's hold on the radio tightened. "What? I don't understand."
"Well, let me clarify it for you." She had begun to pace back and forth in front of Kristin, a nervous, jerky step that looked unnatural in its flow. "I'm a natural, they tell me. I do a great job on the air—as the stand-in. Just not good enough to be given my own show." She saw Kristin's eyes widen in surprise. "You're shocked, I suppose, shocked that someone else might be good at what you do, that you might have some competition. Well, you don't have to worry, they didn't want me. They had the real deal, they had Dear Jane, why would they want another talk-show host." She cradled the gun against her chest, stroking the barrel as though it were a living thing. "But I have a feeling they'll be changing their minds very soon."
Kristin felt light-headed and could hardly believe what she was hearing. How had this happened? How could this madness have taken over Nancy and Kristin not have noticed? Had there been signs that she'd simply ignored?
She thought about the cell phone conversations they'd shared, how she'd thought of Nancy as her lifeline to the outside world. They had talked about the progress of her clients, about strategies and treatment options. How could she have had such intense conversations with this woman and not picked up on how deeply disturbed she was?
But she hadn't, she'd had no idea. Up until a short time
ago, she had trusted Nancy completely. She'd trusted her to watch over her clients, to watch over her practice, she'd even trusted her enough to tell her about Eagle's Eye.
"Is that what this is all about, Nancy?" she asked after a moment. "The show? About 'Lost Loves'?"
"I suppose you think I should be content to just fill in for you from time to time. But you see, I'm not. I'm going to have it all, Kristin," she said, taking several steps toward her. "And I'm prepared to do whatever it takes to get it."
"So that's your plan?" Kristin asked. It took all the control she had to keep the fear from her voice. "Get rid of me so you can take over with your own radio show?"
"You've always been so good with your analysis, Counselor," Nancy pointed out sarcastically. "And you could have made this all so easy if you'd just cooperated." Nancy turned and walked toward the window. The sun was beginning to set and dark shadows had started to fall across the tower. "Anyone else would have been frightened off long ago. But not you. Oh no, you had to make it hard on everyone, you had to be brave and struggle despite the fear." She turned back and looked at Kristin. "How noble."
"So you sent someone to hurt me?"
"Like I said, you didn't make it easy. It should have been you that night in the parking garage, not Tori. If anyone is to blame for her getting hurt, it's you."
"Are you listening to yourself?"
Nancy was visibly surprised by the change in Kristin's tone. "What? What are you talking about?"
"I'm talking about denial," she pointed out. Nancy had not yet noticed the radio in Kristin's hand and the growing darkness gave her hope that maybe she wouldn't. Still, she wasn't sure how much longer she could keep her hold firm. If only Jake would hear, if only he would come back. Nancy was far too smart—and far too dangerous—to keep distracted for much longer. "Listen to what you're saying. It's your fault—not mine. Nancy, come on. That's classic denial. You can tell the rest of the world anything you want, but let's at least be honest with each other."
"Honest? You want to be honest," Nancy challenged. "I want you gone."
"Gone? Or dead?"
Nancy glanced down at the gun in her hand and smiled. "I would have been satisfied with gone, but unfortunately you wouldn't cooperate. I guess I'll just have to settle for dead." She glanced back up at Kristin. "How's that for honesty?"
Kristin wouldn't let herself think, wouldn't let herself consider the consequences. She just plunged forward. "I guess that would depend."
"Oh? Depend on what, Kristin? Enlighten me."
"On just how honest you'll allow yourself to be. Whether you have the guts to face the truth." It was a bold move, and a risky one, but instinct told her Nancy wasn't going to be content with just talking for too much longer. The woman hadn't come here looking for passive compliance. She wanted confrontation, wanted to get all the anger and resentment off her chest. Maybe getting her angry, getting her arguing, would help release some of that pressure and buy Kristin a little more time. "And the truth is, you're a bully…"
"What?" Nancy gasped.
"A jealous, mean-spirited bully," Kristin continued without stopping. "And you think you can intimidate and threaten and coerce the world to play by your rules. Well, I'm here to tell you, Nancy, that's not the way it is. The world doesn't revolve around you."
For a moment she thought she had gone too far, pushed too hard. Nancy just stood there and stared at her, the barrel of the gun drooping in her hand and pointing downward. The expression on her face was unreadable and Kristin didn't know if she should take that as a good sign or not.
"Clever," Nancy finally said after a long moment. "Turning the tables on the accuser. Very good, but then your clinical technique was always good."
"The truth is, an innocent person suffered and nearly died because you, Nancy—not me. And you can bluster around here and try to make excuses, but you can only fool yourself for so long. You were a good therapist once. You know the problem with denial is that you can only keep it up for so long. Has the truth come back to haunt you yet?"
Nancy did nothing, just stood there staring at her and for a moment Kristin thought she may have gone too far. How could she even think she could predict what the woman would do? Nothing about her resembled the woman Kristin thought she knew.
"Oh, are you finished now?" Nancy asked dryly, suddenly springing to life. But Kristin heard the change in her voice, could see the heightened color in her face. Something in what she had said had struck a chord. "Is this the part where I'm supposed to break down, have an attack of conscience, throw myself at your feet sobbing and ask for your forgiveness?" She tilted her head down, giving Kristin a long look. "It's not going to happen, you know that, right?"
Kristin paused for a moment. A strange, almost eerie calm had settled over her. Nancy was the one holding the gun but it was she who felt fearless.
"What isn't going to happen?" she asked, leveling her gaze with Nancy's. "You breaking down? Or me forgiving you?"
"So strong, so brave," Nancy said with a small laugh. "Right to the end."
As though in slow motion, Kristin watched as Nancy raised the gun. She had played her hand out, had gone as far as she could and had nowhere else to go. With her hand still clutching the radio, her mind scrambled but she could think of nothing else. It was as if she had lost the ability to do anything other than simply stand there and stare. Was this how it was to end, with her standing there just watching while Nancy pulled the trigger?
When she first caught a glimpse of Jake moving up silently behind Nancy, she truly believed she was hallucinating, thinking she had literally willed him to appear. But then clarity hit and adrenaline pumped through her veins like fire through a forest.
Jake grabbed Nancy from behind, startling her and causing the gun to discharge. She struggled violently against his hold, kicking and trying to pull the trigger again.
Kristin didn't think, she just moved. She sprang across the room like a place kicker, her foot swinging up and making contact with the hard steel. The gun shot from Nancy's hold, flying across the tower and landing with a crash against one of the windows. The shattered pane held together for a brief moment, then collapsed into a thousand pieces.
For a moment Kristin just stood there, her mind reeling and trying to make some sense of everything. She turned slowly, watching while Jake clapped handcuffs around Nancy's wrists.
It was over—all of it. There were no more threats, no more danger, no more stalker. She wasn't sure what she was feeling, then realized she was numb and wasn't really capable of feeling anything at all.
But as she glanced up, she caught Jake's gaze and emotions flooded back. With no more danger, there was no longer a reason to stay.
Chapter 14
"I don't understand, Jane, I would have done anything for her. I loved her. She'd told me she'd never been so happy—not ever in her life. So why did she leave?"
"I wish I knew, Cal. Maybe she didn't think it mattered to you—if she stayed or if she left."
"Of course it mattered, she knew how much it mattered."
"Did she? You told her?"
"I didn't have to. Women know those things."
"Really, how does that work?"
"Well, you know, you're a woman. It's that female intuition thing. Men aren't good with words, they don't know how to talk about feelings."
"And this makes women mind readers?"
"No, but they know more about that stuff than men do."
"Oh, Cal, my dear, you really do need some advice. Let's hear from some of you women out there, what do you think? What advice do you have for Cowboy Cal? Give us a call, 1–800–NIGHT TALK. I'm Jane Streeter—Dear Jane—and you're listening to 'Lost Loves.'"
"Cal, I feel for you," Jake mumbled, reaching for the bottle of wine. He leaned forward just enough in his chair to fill his glass to the brim. The sound of Kristin's voice moved through his bloodstream like a narcotic, potent and addictive and making him feel more alive than he had in five lo
ng days—five days, eleven hours and—he glanced down at his watch—thirty-seven minutes, give or take a few seconds.
This was her first day back on the air since Nancy Fox's arrest and the first time he'd heard her voice since then. Closing his eyes, he could picture her in the studio, headset pushed back against her long, golden hair, doodle pad in front of her on the desk. Only this time she wasn't broadcasting from a lookout tower in the middle of the wilderness. She was back in a studio a hundred miles away and back to a life that was light-years from here.
He opened his eyes and took a drink of wine. He didn't think he would ever forget the fear and the fury that had gone through his mind when he'd realized what it was he was listening to over the handheld radio. It still amazed him to think she'd had enough wherewithal, given the circumstances, to even think of the radio, let alone attempt to broadcast from it, but nothing about the woman surprised him anymore.
He pushed himself up from the chair, slowly rising to his feet and walking around the deck. The night was black, with only the light of a million stars illuminating the sky, and dead quiet. The silence had never bothered him before—in fact, he'd always found it soothing. But that had been before Kristin, before she had come to Eagle's Eye and changed his world forever. He found no comfort in the silence any longer, just isolation and loneliness.
He walked to the sheet of plywood he'd used to board up the window that had been blown out, remembering how the explosion of Nancy's gun had shattered the silence then. It was a wonder he had reached the tower at all, given the speed he had driven up the mountain road, but at the time, spinning off the edge of the mountain had been about the last thing he'd been thinking of. All he'd been thinking about was Kristin alone with that crazy woman. And the look on Kristin's face when she saw him creep into the tower behind Nancy was something he would never forget.
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