by Dani René
Doubt is a bitch. She strolls in with confidence oozing from every pore. Gripping you by the heart and seducing your mind with negativity so deep-rooted it blackens your soul. And as I lie there in the darkening room, I find her my best friend. The last time I lost Kael it almost killed me. This time, though, I think it will succeed.
Tears sting my eyes. The salty wetness flows like an emotional waterfall down my heated cheeks. The ache in my heart is unlike anything I’ve ever felt. It steals my breath. It shakes me to the very core of my being. It’s as if the silence is mocking me, taunting me, telling me how unworthy I am of a man like him. All those years ago he walked out without so much as a backward glance. I know it wasn’t his fault, but in the confusion swirling through my mind, it feels as if he’s done it again.
Granted, the last time was because of his father. But this time it’s on him.
Pushing off the bed, I let my anger and fear get the better of me. I head straight for the liquor cabinet and find the man I’m looking for. It’s childish. I should call Kota and Axel, but right now, all I want to do is wallow. I want to cry. My heart hurts, as if it’s been ripped from my chest and sliced open, bleeding my emotion onto the floor at my feet.
Grabbing the bourbon, I murmur, “Hello, Jack.” I grin at the bottle and crack the lid. He couldn’t even leave me a fucking note. A Dear John letter. There’s just nothing.
Padding over to the kitchen, I find the small shot glasses Dakota bought me for my birthday. When I read the message on the side, I can’t help giggling through the tears. Smile if you swallow. “Yes, Kitten, I do indeed. Mr. Jack will be my man tonight.” Once I’ve gotten what I need—glass, bottle, tissues—I flop onto the sofa and down shot after shot. I swallow them all, and along with each burning gulp, the anger and frustration and all the years of pain without the man I love, make their way into my bloodstream.
xxx
“Phoenix.” A soft whisper at my left ear rouses me from a dreamless sleep, or I may have passed out. I’m not sure. “Paige, baby.” The voice is louder now. It’s right inside my head, drumming at the inside of my eyes, and it hurts.
Throb. Bang. Throb. Shit.
“Jesus, baby, how much did you drink?” A sweet smell hits me right in the gut, and the alcohol I’d consumed the night before swirls like a tornado in my stomach. A shiver wracks my body, and I’m suddenly freezing. Water running alerts me that I’m no longer on the sofa, but in the bathroom.
When I dare crack my eyes, I find Kael staring back at me. Concern etched on his perfect face. “Kael?” The word feels foreign, and I’m certain I’m dreaming. I’m lost to the agony that engulfed me last night. “You’re real?” His touch is warm, searing my skin.
“I am, baby. Why the hell did you finish a bottle of bourbon on your own?” he questions, confusion furrowing his brows in earnest. A second wave of nausea hits me. I push him away, falling to my knees at the porcelain bowl. My body convulses painfully. My hair is tugged back, but I swat his hand away.
The shower is still running, but I don’t care about that as the pain morphs into anger. “Fuck you. Get away from me.” His body stills beside me, and confusion mixed with anger swarms around him. I’ve spoken out of turn. He was the one who left without so much as a fucking note, and now suddenly he’s trying to be caring.
Arms encircle me, and once again, the whiff of sweetness fills my nostrils. His shirt. It’s coming from Kael, and more anger hits me, punches me so hard my body convulses with a cry, a sob, a fucking painful reminder that he left and now that he’s back, he smells of someone else.
“What the fuck is wrong with you, Phoenix?” he bites out in frustration, and I meet his dark glare.
“I said, get the hell away from me. If I have to smell someone else on you, I’ll rip your fucking balls off!” I hiss in anger. Instead of the angry retort I expect him to blast me with, he chuckles. The sound feels foreign in my mind. He shouldn’t be laughing. How can he do this to me? He was with someone else and now he’s laughing at me? Rage consumes me, and I see red. Fisting my hands, I plough them into his solid chest, and he allows it. Only two punches with each hand before he grips my wrists so hard, I yelp.
“Stop. Stop it now or I will tie you up and fuck you raw,” he grunts and tugs me over to him. My legs automatically straddle him. His gaze burns into me, boring a hole right through my gaping chest. “I wasn’t with another woman last night, baby. Well, not in the way you think,” he murmurs, burying his nose in my neck and inhaling my scent. “You smell. Let’s get you showered.”
“I’m not going anywhere until you tell me why you smell like perfume. And it’s not mine,” I bite back, ripping my hands from his. I scramble off him and rise to full height.
When he finally stands up, he rakes his fingers over the beard he’s been growing. “I was with Samael and Freya. I probably smell like Layla, their daughter.”
“Oh.” My anger slowly dissipates, and my glower softens into a sheepish stare.
“Jesus, you’re a little firecracker. Aren’t you, baby?”
“Why weren’t you answering any of my calls?” Peeking up at him through my lashes, I meet those dark eyes. He watches me for a moment before sighing. He knows I’m stubborn, there’s no way he’s going to get away from an explanation right here, right now.
“I was doing something…” His words taper off and I watch something flicker behind his expression. “Illegal. I needed to focus so I turned my phone off.”
“Illegal?” I squeak, causing the throb in my mind to return with a vengeance. “What? I mean. You were with Sam?” He nods.
“I’ll explain once you’ve showered and you’re awake. Please baby, it’s important.” This time he implores me, and I relent. I nod and he offers an ominous smirk. “But, let me tell you something.” He pulls away, meeting my emerald gaze. “If you ever think I’m cheating on you, I’ll spank your ass so fucking red that you’ll not be able to move for at least a month. I don’t want anyone else, you’re mine. You’re my forever. My love, my life, my heart. Do you understand me?”
“Yes, I just—”
He interrupts me by placing a finger on my lips, silencing my words. “There’s nothing else to say on this matter. Tonight I’ll punish you accordingly, because you’ve got me hard as fuck and I can’t do it now. We need to talk.” His face falls, and I realize this must be serious.
“What is it about?”
“Get in the shower. I’ll be right back.” He leaves me in the steamy bathroom, and I shed my clothes which smell of puke and bourbon. My stomach roils at the stench, and I quickly deposit the offending items in the laundry hamper.
Stepping under the spray, I allow it to wash the sadness from my mind and the ache from my heart.
He didn’t leave me.
How could I have even thought that?
Because he’s done it before. I realize the agony from the first time I lost him has propelled a fear of abandonment that he’ll do it again.
As much as he’s promised me forever, sometimes that bitch called doubt steps in and tangles her claws in my mind.
“Get out of your head, Firebird,” he growls from behind me. I spin on my heel to find Kael in all his naked glory. His body is perfect, with a smattering of dark chest hair, which gives him a manly look that leaves my thighs clenching.
“I’m…”
“Turn around, face the wall and bend at the waist.” His command is strong and harsh, but the slight growl that rumbles in his chest tells me he’s ready to mark me. And I so want him to do that. To make me ache and scream. For him to show me how much he owns me.
I wait for the slap or the tip of his cock to tease me, but it’s only when I feel a finger at my puckered hole do I gasp. “What—”
“Teaching you a lesson in respecting your Master,” he tells me easily. I can hear the smirk in his tone. I’ve fucked up I know that, and he’s going to enjoy punishing me. “Place your hands on the tiles and hold on, baby,” he murmurs as he slow
ly teases a finger into me.
The sensation of him fingering my ass is too much causing me to mewl loudly. The sound bounces off the tiles and through the cascading spray, I revel in the sensations racing through me.
Another finger joins the first and as he scissors me open, my legs begin to tremble. I’ve never had an orgasm from anal alone, but the way Kael is taunting me, I’m sure it will happen. But, as suddenly as it started, he pulls both fingers from me and replaces them with something cold.
“Just breathe, relax.” We’ve played with toys before, but this feels bigger, thicker. The metal plug slips past the tight ring and I’m immediately filled to the max.
“God...” A moan falls from my lips.
“That’s Sir to you, Phoenix.” He chuckles and rains a harsh slap on each cheek. My body quivers, and I instinctively push back against his crotch. A feather light touch strokes my bare lips and circles my clit. An orgasm taunts me, tightening everything below my belly button, but as soon as I grasp the feeling, his fingers leave me wanting, panting, and aching. “Let’s see how long you can last.”
With that, he steps out of the shower and grabs a towel, wrapping it around his waist.
“But—” I rise to find myself alone and needy. Torture. He’s torturing me.
Jesus, I’m in for a long day.
21
Kael
Thoughts of the last couple of days are running rampant in my mind. It took us time, but we found the asshole, now I need to talk to Paige about him.
Once the cab pulls up to Sam and Freya’s home, I pay and exit the vehicle. As soon as I reach the door and knock it swings open and I’m met with cobalt eyes. He holds out a hand. “Kael, I’m glad you came. I didn’t want to do this alone.”
“Anything for my girl,” I offer a smile, shaking my brother’s hand in camaraderie. “It’s good to see you.” He steps aside, allowing me inside his home. I’ve never been here and I take a moment to flit my gaze over it.
It’s so homely. Warm and inviting. We head into the living room and I’m assaulted by the scent of freshly brewed coffee. Freya enters with a beautiful smile. “Kael, so good to see you,” she wraps her arms around me, and I can’t help hugging her close.
“I’m sorry it’s not under better circumstances,” I say. She nods, stepping back to look at her husband.
“I’ll leave you two. Goodnight Kael.” With a kiss for her husband, we’re left alone with piles of folders and files, as well as a large pot of caffeine.
“I’m sure the kids will be happy to see you.” Something in that moment makes me want to apologize. I’m not sure what for, but we both settle on the sofa before I speak.
“Look, Sam. This was never an easy thing for me. You took to life with Harlan like it was your destiny. I wasn’t built that way. I wanted love, a family.”
“I know. I never blamed you. Yeah, I was pissed when you left, when he threw you out, but that night something in me snapped. I couldn’t be in that house alone. You were always the one who I knew would make it out. There’s something I need to confess. When I met Freya, I knew it was time I got out. When I stopped being selfish and broke her out, something happened.” He’s silent for a long while, but then he meets my gaze. “I haven’t told Theia yet, but, one night Dad made me watch a recording of what he did to my woman, I lost it in that moment. I guess all my anger and rage from the years of abuse at his hand finally got to me. Dax didn’t kill dad, I did.”
Shock slams into me. I open my mouth to respond, but I can’t find the words.
“Dax was there, he helped me cover it up. Thing is, because the FBI was involved I didn’t want to implicate you or little Wolfe.” He uses Theia’s nickname I gave her when we were teens. “I choked him. I watched the light in his eyes flicker out like a flame and I didn’t care. The remorse I felt was because I didn’t do it sooner. And taking a life, even one as evil as his, was difficult.”
“Sam, we’re family. You should have come to us. We’re blood. No matter what the fuck happens.” A connection I’ve never felt with Sam is there between us in this moment. A sense of kinship. Friendship. Brothers.
“I need to figure out how to tell Theia I killed our father,” he says quietly.
“We will. Let’s sort Harkin out and we’ll talk to little Wolfe together.” He nods, and we spend the next few hours going through the documents. By three in the morning, I’m exhausted, but I look at him and ask for the main reason I’m here. “Can I see the recording of Paige?”
“It’s hard to watch,” he warns before popping open the laptop and inserting a portable drive into the slot. He clicks on the one titled “Paige” and when the screen fills with a scene playing out, I’m ready to rip someone to shreds.
My blood simmers, then reaches boiling point as anger and rage race through my veins while I watch what they did to my girl. My vision blurs, all I see is red. The need for revenge runs rife, choking me with emotion I can’t explain. “We need to find this fucker, I want to watch him bleed. Prison is too good for him. He needs to fucking burn.”
“I agree. We’ll find him, Kael. I promise you brother.” And just like that, the two Wolfe brothers have joined forces to bring down the last remaining filth in our family.
Finding my uncle was luck, but when I finally laid my eyes on him, I wanted to watch him bleed to death. Fury made me slam my fist into him until he was a bleeding mess. Sam pulled me off and told me we needed the girls to decide his fate. He’s right. I needed to talk to Paige first. Both Freya and Paige need to put their past behind them.
I’ll tell her I saw the recording of what he did to her. Just thinking about it makes me want to murder. To slice him to shreds and bathe in his blood. Jesus, get a hold of yourself.
We’ve got a plan, though. He’s gone to talk to Freya, and I’m going to talk to Paige. They’re the ones who need to decide what they want to do. If they want revenge, we will most certainly stand by and support them. But, if they want us to do it, I’m ready. I’ve been ready for a long time.
When Sam told me he killed our father, first shock hit me, but then relief. What kind of son would feel relief hearing his brother killed their father? Me. And guilt was nowhere to be found because that piece of shit deserved it. Fuck, he should have been maimed and tortured.
Paige pads barefoot into the kitchen, and I can tell she’s uncomfortable. Her body is craving release. I can tell by the shimmer in her eyes—they’re alight with desire. But, before I get to play, we need to talk. Let’s see how she handles that butt plug in her cute ass while we have a relaxing conversation about what the fuck she was thinking getting piss-ass drunk while I was sorting out shit with my brother.
“Why do I have to wear a butt plug?” She pouts as she settles on the stool. Her actions are slow and I can’t help grinning. With each movement, her body will feel the heaviness of the plug which will taunt her. Today she’ll learn to never fucking doubt me or my love for her. Ever.
“Because you’re being punished. Can you tell me why I feel the need to do that?” I question. She stares at me. I can see the wheels turning in her pretty little head. The petulance dances in her eyes. She wants to retort, but she should know better and she does.
“I was stupid to think you’d leave me,” she mumbles. Good girl.
“Yes, for being bad, for jumping to conclusions, and for not trusting my love for you,” I inform her while placing a mug of coffee before her. She gratefully lifts the steamy cup to her lips, and I watch as she savors the liquid.
“But—”
“No buts, unless it’s yours,” I interrupt, offering her a smirk. Swallowing the last of my coffee, I regard her earnestly. “I needed to talk to you about something, though. It might bring back memories.” My voice drops, and I watch her reaction. “Bad ones.”
“Kael, I’m a big girl. What’s wrong?”
Inhaling a deep breath, I reach for her hand, and when she slips mine in hers, I start my story. “I left two days ago to see Samae
l. He called me and told me that my uncle was still alive.” Lifting her hand, I plant a soft, chaste kiss on her knuckles. “When Caged closed down, Sam found some recordings of the girls, he showed me one of you, from the day after I left…”
I allow my words to taper off, hoping she’ll be honest and tell me the horrors she faced. I’ve seen it, every minute, each moment of her debasement. The depraved things he did to her in those parties. Six men to one girl. All the recordings were the same, each girl went through the same vile ordeal.
“If you’ve seen it, why do I need to tell you what happened?” She pulls her hand from my grip and rises from the stool. Her body shivers with what I can only guess is fear. Of course she doesn’t want to recall those horrific things, but I need her words to fuel her.
I need her angry, so when I tell her that we’ve got the fucker holed up in the basement of his house, she’ll be ready to do what needs to be done. For her to get the revenge that she deserves. I also want her rabid, because I need to fuck the anger out of me and into her.
The craving to take her and climb inside her, just so I can hold her soul while she screams my name when she comes undone, is vicious.
“When you left, Sam came to my room the next morning. He told me he’d be training me since you’d been told to leave,” she starts.
Her voice is a million miles away, and I wonder if she’s walking back through time. If she’s in that room at this moment.
“He allowed me to dress, then he walked me to this room, bound me and left me there to be hurt by your father, even though he was in a mask I recognized his voice. There was another man though. I didn’t know him, he also wore a mask. There’s something not on those recordings though. There were other times where a man would collect me. One who wasn’t Sam. He used to take me to a part of the mansion none of the other girls knew about. I’d asked them. The man who ran these parties wasn’t your father, at least I didn’t see him there. This man who was hurting me wasn’t him because his voice was different.” She falls silent and I’m certain this is my father’s wing, which Samael had mentioned. Growing up, I don’t remember ever knowing about this section of the house.