by Xyla Turner
Despite all of that, we were going strong and like every union, it would be tested.
I just had no idea where that test was coming from.
Nor, how it came.
Chapter Thirteen
Reversal
KAT
The past couple of months with Vic had been momentous. If his goal was to sweep me off my feet, he more than succeeded. My day wasn't complete without at least talking to him. He'd become a part of my world and in essence, we created our own.
Occasionally, we invited others in but it was him and me. We hung out with D’asia and Ryan but there were some things happening within the force that they didn't tell me about, so we didn't see them as much lately.
Vic had another dinner planned with one of his friends from the academy. He said I would like him but I told him he and Ryan were the only cops I liked. He gave me a look but didn't say anything.
Well, apparently, I didn't learn my lesson.
We had plans for dinner that evening but he was in a terrible mood. I tried to get him to laugh but all I got was a smirk. Vic reminded me that we had the dinner with his friend and I missed the cue to shut the fuck up. So, I said, “Ugh, do we have to? I really don't like cops.
I said it again and needless to say, that was the one time that Vic told me off.
“Kat, you're a really smart woman but when you say shit like that, it makes you sound ignorant. How the fuck do you know every cop? You know how? Because, you don't. Yes, there are some fucked up cops just like there are fucked up doctors, nurses and it was just in the news, a lab tech lied and sent thousands of folks to jail, and for what. She's fucked up. But when you say you don't like cops except Ryan and me, it really is like me saying, I don't like black people besides you and D’asia. Now, what the fuck does that sound like?”
I was so shocked and taken aback; I simply stood up and grabbed my purse. As I left, Vic dropped his fork and knife and then threw his napkin on top of the barely touched food.
“Kat, wait.” He called but I kept walking.
Once the door was closed, there was a crash and I figured it was probably best that I left. Instead of going straight home, I stopped by the store on my way to grab a drink. Nothing strong; just a couple of those daiquiris to get through my night of binge-watching television.
What I wasn't going to do was dwell on the comments Vic said to me and especially the truth behind it. I wouldn't and definitely not that night.
Hence, I didn't get to sleep until around four o’clock and I hadn't even made a dent into the Sons of Anarchy seasons. Despite my fruity drink intake, I still didn't sleep well. I wanted to call Vic but every time I replayed what he said, I grew madder. I knew he was right but I was too angry to even acknowledge that shit. I kept hearing ignorant and him implying I was not a racist but prejudice. However, if he told me he didn't like black people but D’asia and me, he'd be called a racist.
Oh.
D’asia.
I needed to talk to D’asia.
She answered on the first ring and she said, “What happened?”
“Why did something have to happen?” I asked with a laugh.
“Because, Ryan just went into his man cave to talk to Vic and I figured it had to be something with the department or with you. Then you called and I guessed it was you.” She laughed.
“Ha, well, you caught me.” I said. “Can we meet up or something? Girl, I got to talk to someone who understands what the hell I’m going through.”
“Yeah, sure. How about we meet at the cafeteria on campus?”
“That’s perfect. I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.”
D’asia took a little longer to get there but it was fine because I could take some time to gather my thoughts, since I refused to think about it yesterday.
“Spill,” she said when she walked up to me with an iced coffee. “What happened?”
I sighed.
Shit, I didn’t even know where to begin.
“Well, Vic was in a bad mood. It was weird, we’d been doing so well and going strong for over two months now and then this mood happened and if he’s not in the best of moods, I can usually get him to laugh but last night,” I shook my head. “No such luck. So, I said something that I shouldn’t have at that time, I guess. But Vic went off. Not like yelling but his words just cut deep and−”
“What did you say?” D’asia cut me off.
“I told him that I didn’t want to be around a bunch of cops and the only cops that I liked were Ryan and him. Girl, he basically called me ignorant and asked what if he said the only black people he liked were you and me. How would I fucking feel?” I raised my hands for the effect of it and then continued. “I got up, grabbed my shit and got out of there.”
“Damn,” D’asia sighed. “Damn.”
“So, I need your advice. I know he’s right and we had a semi-conversation about this before. However, I don’t know how to let go of my past, those experiences or anything to remotely feel comfortable in a room full of cops. It’s almost like PTSD and going back to when we were younger. Shit, I didn’t even tell you what happened with the cop a couple of months ago.” D’asia nodded. “I mean, it’s like, the world is playing tricks on me. I’m falling in love with the actual person that represents everything I despise and then he wants me to be around them and I’m supposed to do what?”
Even talking about it made my blood boil a few notches higher. What was I supposed to do?
D’asia sighed again, and she said, “How do you want it? Straight or with ice?”
My hand raised for her to continue, “Go ahead. Straight.”
“I’ll start with this. I had my issues with Ryan and his mother. The woman confronted me and basically told me to leave her son alone; in return, I told the both of them to have a great life.” She raised an eyebrow and continued, “Well, Ryan in so many words, said fuck what his mom was talking about, it was me he wanted. He made damn sure I knew that and wouldn’t allow anyone, including his old partner, Sal, talk crazy about our union. Believe me, I’m not going to sit here and act like, I’m super comfortable being around a lot of cops, his family or whoever, but what I do have comfort in, is that Ryan McFadden has my back. If anyone acts like they have a problem, Mr. McFadden will beat me to the punch. He does not play that shit and you know what, Kat, I do not hold him back. I let him do just that.”
She took a breath, and said, “Now, about that Vic and I’m telling you privileged information. You do NOT repeat this.” I nodded my head. “When Vic found out which cop killed DaShawn, he literally beat the shit out of him. It took four to five cops to pull his ass off of him. His face was so banged up, he had to get plastic surgery. That’s one. Now, this was for a kid that he spent six months getting to know and one that stole his heart in a big brother sort of way. You were at the funeral, so you know what I mean. Now, I know about you being pulled over and what you don’t know is that Vic beat the shit out of Post that night too. He took Ryan with him to make damn sure he didn’t kill him. I did not object because I knew damn well, what needed to be done. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t condone violence or whatever, but unfortunately, that’s what these men understand. That’s a world that they get. You just don’t fuck with them or the people they love. So, I’m saying all that to say is, it’s okay to be uncomfortable. That will either go away or you’ll need to work on that, but what you do need to do is, trust in your man. Vic is like Ryan. They’re cops, but they are leaders and genuinely good guys. Yet, they will put a man down if they fuck with what they consider to be theirs. Even when it comes to their own family, friends and brothers in blue and you and I both know they stick together, but fuck with their shit. All bets are off. So, if you don’t trust not a one of them, you can trust him.”
There wasn’t really much else to say behind that. No ifs, ands or buts about it. That was the truth and I didn’t even know those details. A guy bumped me on the train and I had to pull Vic back because that dude was about to go down. I kn
ew something crazy happened with Vic that night he came to the hospital with his hand messed up. If that guy was the one that killed DaShawn, then he definitely needed plastic surgery because his face looked as if it was pounded in. That was probably why he was on leave and why the cop, Post, said what he did.
“You’re right, D’asia.” I nodded my head. “You’re absolutely right.”
“Well, the other thing is Kat, and I mean this as a friend; when you talk about cops in a derogatory way, no matter what your past entails. You’re saying that there is a part of him that you don’t accept. Despite what the role of the police have been in the latest trends, some actually meant the oaths that they took. To serve and fucking protect. I can’t and won’t speak for everyone, but there are more that do that than don’t. So don’t group the bad apples in with the good. Hate bad cops, just like you hate bad doctors. You know. He became a cop because he’s a protector and you should know that when it comes to you, that’s what he’d do every time.”
Ouch.
“How’d you become so smart?” I asked with a small laugh.
“Well, Ryan and I have had our share of discussions about this. One of the reasons why I hadn’t really moved in or gone further with him was my own reservations. Then Ryan began to show me in ways that I could see, how I was holding us apart from being truly together. He’s still helping me, but I’ve learned to trust him and his love for me. I swear, I used to think it was a cruel joke or something. I don’t know what the fuck I was thinking. Zee loves him and I swear, he wants to move in more than me. It’s hard work, but we’re working. You know?” D’asia smiled.
“I know. It looks good on you, girl.” I reached for her hand. “I needed to talk to you because I know I’m doing it and on some level, I don’t think it should be but it feels so right. When I’m with him, we’re so wrapped up in each other, I don’t even care about anything else. It’s just us and that’s enough but then I get scared and feel like I’m giving up everything. My brother found out about him simply being white. I’m not even sure if he knows he’s a cop but he hasn’t spoken to me in almost three months. D’asia, he and I were tight. Always have been because we were all each other had but I swear to God, as much as I love my brother, I won’t condone his stance. Especially against Vic.”
D’asia nodded her head and said, “So, it seems like you already made a choice, huh?”
Damn, I didn’t even think about it like that.
“Yeah, I guess. I have.”
We talked for a bit more and very much in D’asia style, she challenged me and made me think outside of my norm. I could appreciate that as it helped me personally and professionally.
My shift started at the normal time and since I didn’t have much to do beforehand, I went in early. Ironically, as soon as I walked through the door, the phone started to ring and the calls, lights, and police started to come through the door.
“Officer has been shot. Officer down!” Three officers came running through the doors holding one guy who was bleeding from his neck.
Sandy has the buzzer to signal the nurses to get out in the front and I threw my bag and went to get a gurney for him. My heart was racing because Vic was on duty that night.
“What happened?” I asked one of the officers.
He was shaking his head slowly and murmured, “He just opened fire. I was standing right next to him. It was peaceful.”
“What?” I asked.
My heart sunk a little deeper. Was it at a rally? Who else was shot? What the fuck?”
“He just opened fire,” he murmured again.
Oh good God.
“Officer down,” I heard more yelling outside.
Fuck.
Where was Vic? I wanted to reach for my phone but I had to stop the bleeding in the officer’s neck since the doctor hadn’t arrived yet.
Where was my brother?
Fuck.
Fuck.
Fuck.
Once the bleeding stopped, the doctor came in, barked some orders and the other nurse took over. I went outside to check on the other officers and saw two there.
Apparently, two more officers had been shot and one was here and the other on their way. I directed the nurses and doctors to their prospective rooms and waited for the other. The place was filled with cops, so I didn’t want to pull out my phone and text anyone but I figured as soon as the other cop came in, I’d get them set up and text the guys.
“Do you know the name of the other cop?” I asked one of them.
“Yeah, Victor, from the twenty-second precinct, I believe. This shit is bad. He just opened fire and started shooting at…”
My knees grew weak as my heart dropped out of my chest.
“Officer down,” the cop yelled as they burst through the doors.
My legs could barely move, but I ran over to see him. I had to see him and assess the damage. Fuck, he was too young for this shit. Why did he have to work? Why did we argue? Why didn’t I call him and apologize after I talked to D’asia?
Tears started to form in my eyes and I realized that it would not be helpful if a sobbing nurse was assessing any patient.
The gurney was brought over and the men lifted him on top of it but his face was covered in blood. The body physique was similar but it didn’t look like him.
“Vic?” I called to the guy on the gurney.
“No, this is Vincent,” one cop answered as we wheeled him to his room.
“Okay, okay.” I hate to admit that I felt relief, but I did.
Were there any more police shot? Did they get that number wrong?
As soon as the third cop had a doctor and a nurse, I started walking towards the bathroom.
“Kat?” I heard a familiar voice call.
My head swiveled around to see my Vic, standing there covered in blood and a weary a look on his face. I didn’t care about any of it because I ran to him and wrapped my arms around his neck.
“Oh my God. You’re alright!” I screamed. “God, you’re alright.”
“Yeah, sweetheart. I’m good.” He squeezed me back. “I’m perfect now.”
He held my face with his hands and kissed my lips several times.
“I’m sorry, Vic. Okay? I was out of line and I’m really sorry,” I said rather quickly.
“It’s fine, sweetheart.”
“No, no. You always have my back. Okay? You always do? That’s just who you are and I know that. So, I’m sorry. I’ll go wherever you want. Okay?” My voice was trembling as the tears started to spill over and down my face.
Vic wiped them with the back of his hand and said, “Kat, it was me. I was dealing with some shit and instead of talking to you, I took it out on you. We should have talked and we didn’t. It’s as much my fault as it was yours. Can we talk about it later?”
My head was nodding so fast, it felt like it was about to come off. “Yes, yes. There are some things I need to tell you as well.”
It was time.
“Of course,” Vic nodded. “Let me just handle this and we’ll catch up tonight.”
I nodded and backed away; taking inventory of his clothes.
“Okay, if you want, I can run to your place and get some fresh clothes for you.”
Vic's face scrunched up and he muttered, “Shit. I forgot. Go into my back right pocket and pull out the case.”
His body twisted half a notch and I unbuttoned his pants pocket and grabbed the box.
“Sorry, meant to give this to you over dinner but shit went haywire. That’s your key.”
Mother of Pearl!
“W-what?” I exclaimed.
“That's yours, sweetheart.” He smiled. “That would be great. I’m not feeling this shit.”
Vic pointed to his clothes. Then he asked, “You got any word on my brothers?”
“No, the first one looked bad, but the bleeding stopped. The rest, I'm not sure.”
His head nodded and I stood on my toes, kissed him on the lips and said, “Let me make sure al
l the patients are good and then I’ll run and get your clothes.”
He patted my bottom and said, “See you when you get back. Be careful.”
I nodded, made my rounds, then left to tell Sandy I was taking lunch. As predicted, it took twelve to fifteen minutes to get there and the same amount to get back. His bag was filled with pants, two shirts, one a tee and another button up, socks, boots and an extra uniform just in case he was still on duty.
When I came back, it wasn't my expectation that he would be sitting amongst the guys and decided to stay there. I held up his bag as if to say come here but he waved me over.
Shit.
My legs slowly walked towards him and he pulled me on his lap in front of seven other cops and a guy in regular clothes.
“Whoa,” I laughed nervously.
“Guys, this is Kat. Kat, this is Joe, Mince, Brad, Mark, Derrick, Lizard, and that's a friend, Reggie.” He pointed to the black guy in plain clothes and a beard.
“Hey, guys.” I waved at everyone.
“Hey, Kat,” they all said with sarcastic glee.
I laughed.
“Why settle for this guy?” The short guy, Mark, asked with a comical smirk.
My shoulders lifted and I said, “He didn’t really give me a choice.”
They all laughed, while Vic squeezed my center and planted a kiss on my bicep, a little lower than my short sleeve scrub stopped.
“Whoa, Vic,” the guy closest to him, Mince whistled. “How you do that?”
“Cause I’m a fucking catch,” Vic laughed. “Don’t seem so surprised.”
“Shit, man. I am.” Mince laughed. “Maybe pretty boy Mark, but you? Nahhh!”
All the guys started laughing and hitting each other as Vic attempted to punch him in the arm but couldn’t because I was on his lap.
“Alright, I got to go but it was nice meeting you.” I turned towards Vic and whispered, “You can change in the lounge if you want. Sandy has the keys.”
“Thanks, sweetheart.” He kissed me on the lips and said, “I’m coming to you after I’m off shift.”