by Brooke Moss
She didn’t laugh like I’d hoped she would. “Go home.”
“No. Not without you.” I kept idling next to Posey. “I don’t care what your mom is like. I don’t give a damn what happened when you were a kid. That’s not you. It doesn’t, like, define you anymore than the fact that my father knocks me around defines me.”
She stopped walking and looked at me, her hair whipping in the wind. I wanted to tangle my hands in and breathe her in. Pretend like this whole night hadn’t happened. “You could be with anyone. The whole town would practically roll out a red carpet for you and whomever you decided to date. Don’t you want to date someone who won’t ruin your whole reputation?”
I put the car in park, and climbed out. “I only want you.”
Posey didn’t move. She just wrapped her arms around herself, locked in place. “I don’t care.”
Groaning, I rubbed my eyes. “You’re such a pain in the ass. What is it with you, and acting so indifferent about things? Why do you do that? Do you have any idea how annoying it is?”
“Hey. Don’t knock it.” A smile tickled the corners of her mouth. “There’s an art to being indifferent, you know.”
“No, I don’t know,” I snapped. “Why don’t you enlighten me?”
Posey dropped her arms, and her shoulders drooped. “It’s not something that can be taught.”
“Well, you should knock it off.” I grit my teeth together. “It’s driving me insane.”
She looked away. “Are we having our first fight?”
“No.” When Posey looked back at me, I pulled her into my arms. “We’re making up now.”
Posey took a shuddering breath. “I’m sorry I told you I don’t care. I do.”
“I know you do.” I closed my eyes and kissed her hair. “I care, too. Otherwise I wouldn’t be here.”
She pulled back enough to look at me, and my breath caught. She really was beautiful. “Are you sure you don’t care where I came from? Most… most people do, even when they say they don’t.”
I pressed my lips against hers, letting warmth spread through my body. My chest constricted. “I don’t care,” I whispered against Posey’s lips, my words getting whisked away by the wind. “I swear it. I only care about how I feel when I’m with you.”
“Which is what?”
I guided her over to my car and opened the passenger’s side door. “Right.”
Chapter Twenty
Her.
My hand was in Drew’s as we left Mr. Kingston’s class. “If you think you’re going to hide out in the courtyard for lunch today, you’ve got another thing coming,” he said lowly. “I promised Mac we’d sit with him today.”
I giggled. “This doesn’t have anything to do with his massive crush on Jessa, does it?”
“It absolutely has everything to do with that.” Drew winked at me, making my insides turn all mushy. “I’ll meet you there.”
“Fine,” I rolled my eyes.
“Thanks.” He leaned in and kissed my cheek. “And you’re coming to my meet tonight, right? Mac said he would drive you to Oak Harbor for it. Only three more to go in the season.”
I touched the dull green mark on his face and smiled as he walked away. “Wouldn’t miss it.”
In the week since the bonfire party, we’d somehow managed to stay off Mayor Baxter’s radar—and out of trouble, giving his face time to heal up. I’d seen Mr. Kingston and the coach watching Drew wearily in the hallways, but if they suspected Mayor Baxter of anything, neither of them said so. I wasn’t sure whether I appreciated that or resented them for it. I didn’t think Drew’s dad deserved to get away with that crap, but I also didn’t want Drew’s life to implode, either.
It reminded me of the last time the social worker took my brothers and me out of the apartment where we’d lived with my mom. I hadn’t wanted to leave her, because she needed me. I was the one who kept things together. I reminded her to get up and brush her teeth. But the social worker had promised to buy us French fries, and I remember being so hungry. Even at ten years old, I’d been torn.
Now I was torn over Drew’s situation. There didn’t seem to be good solution, besides him leaving… and no matter what I did to try to convince him to, he argued that he could hang on a bit longer. He said he could make it through to the end of the school year. But I wasn’t stupid. Hell, I was a foster kid, for pete’s sake. I knew Drew kept hanging around because this was his family. It didn’t matter how many times his dad knocked him around, it was still his dad doing it.
“Posey, could I have a word with you?”
I stopped in the classroom doorway and cringed. Mr. Kingston had caught us kissing during our tutoring session the day before, and I’d been waiting for the hammer to come down on us. “Um… sure.” I sat down in a desk stiffly. “What’s up?”
Mr. Kingston sat down a few desks apart from me. “So you and Drew have gotten close.”
I shifted in my seat, uncomfortable. “Yeah.”
“And…” He paused, folding his arms across his chest before continuing. “You’re planning to continue this relationship?”
Annoyance crept up on me, and I stared Mr. Kingston dead in the eye. “Yes. Why?”
He cleared his throat. “I just worry about you being involved with Drew, that’s all.”
I sucked in a sharp breath. Who did this guy think he was? He wasn’t my dad. The closest person I had to a dad thought Drew was the greatest thing since sliced bread. “How is this any of your business?”
“Whoa.” He put out his hands. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to offend you.”
“Too late.” I scooped my backpack off the floor and started to stand up.
“Listen, Posey.” Mr. Kingston put out a hand to stop me. “I’m not finished.”
Flopping back down in a seat, I looked away from him. Seriously. Just when I was starting to actually like a teacher…
“You may not know this, but Drew’s father isn’t exactly a reasonable guy,” he explained, his voice lowering to barely louder than a whisper. “He tends to bully people to get what he wants, and I’m concerned that if he finds out you and Drew are involved, he’ll create trouble for you.”
I swallowed. My throat felt dry. “If you know so much about Drew’s dad, then why don’t you call CPS on him?”
Mr. Kingston looked over his shoulder, then back at me. “I did last year. The department of child welfare won’t open an investigation until there are a number of calls made. And after that, they only open an abuse investigation when there is physical proof of injury. Apparently I’m the first person from the school who has ever made a claim. I insisted the counselor talk to Drew, to get to the bottom of things and possibly get a few more claims called in, but Drew swore nothing bad was happening. When Mayor Baxter got wind that I’d said something, he was fuming. Coach says he refuses to get involved again unless Drew asks for help himself. And so far, Drew insists every bruise and black eye happened because of his own clumsiness. Since he’s eighteen now, calling child protection services is futile, especially without a victim willing to talk. Frankly put, Posey, I’m sick of it. Just because Principal Parrish and Coach are intimidated by Mayor Baxter, doesn’t mean I am.”
I pressed my lips together tightly. I didn’t know what to say. If I said too much, Mr. Kingston would have enough reason to call the state again, but if I didn’t tell him what I knew, that bastard Mayor Baxter would continue treating Drew like his own personal punching bag. I opened my mouth, prepared to tell Mr. Kingston all I knew.
“I’m not telling you this to put you into an uncomfortable position.” Mr. Kingston interrupted, pushing up his glasses. “I’m just letting you know that if Mayor Baxter sees you and Drew together again, he may make your life difficult. Or your foster parents’ lives. He’s not above intimidation masked with a smile.”
“Right.” I looked down. My stomach felt like it was made out of lead. “Is that all?”
“One more thing.” He sighed. “Um…”
I lifted my eyes and saw that a line had appeared across my teachers’ forehead. My lead stomach sank even lower. Great. What now?
Mr. Kingston cleared his throat. “Mayor and Mrs. Baxter have asked that you stop tutoring Drew.”
It felt like I’d been punched. “What? How did they even know?”
“I don’t know.” He looked down at the desk and shook his head. “They were here at the school waiting for me with Principal Parrish before school this morning. I think someone told them, but I’m not sure who.”
I could see by the way his mouth was pulled down in the corners that he had something else on his mind. My iron stomach quickly turned into a cauldron bubbling with anger. “Did Mayor Baxter get you in trouble?” I asked.
There was a pause. A very long, annoying pause worthy of a musical montage. Then Mr. Kingston looked up and forced a smile. “It was inappropriate of me to arrange work for a student without informing his parents of my plans.”
And with that, he stood up and returned to his desk.
“But you had to!” I jumped out of my seat, and followed him. “You were trying to help Drew. Don’t they appreciate that?”
“I’m sorry, Posey.” He started sorting through some papers. “I can’t discuss it with you any further. I’ve already stepped over too many boundaries. I appreciate what you’ve done to help Drew improve his grade. I have no doubt it will be pivotal in getting him a scholarship. But please, if you know what’s good for you, just stay away from him.”
“But… you’re the one who convinced me to become his friend in the first place.”
“Yes. Well. I made a mistake. His parents won’t like you dating him, and they’re not the kind of people you want to upset. Understood?”
I suddenly felt ashamed. Like I was a little kid being told to go home from a friend’s house. Like I’d felt at the bonfire the weekend before. You’d think I’d be used to being the odd girl out, after all these years in the system. Moving from house to house, being plopped down into people’s lives without warning. It made feeling like I was part of a family impossible. I’d never felt like I was part of an actual circle of friends before, either.
That is, until I met Drew.
“I won’t just drop him.” I locked my jaw in place and hiked my backpack up on my shoulders. “They can’t make me, and neither can you.”
“Then it sounds as if you’ve made up your mind.” Mr. Kingston frowned at me. “Good luck.”
I didn’t reply. I didn’t have anything to say to him.
***
The auditorium in Oak Harbor was so sticky hot inside that the chlorine-scented air stung my nose as I breathed. I could tell that Mac, who sat next to me pretending not to care that Jessa hadn’t shown up for the meet, was holding his breath, so I tried to copy him. But the Baxter’s sat just three rows below us, and it made my pulse race. My breath come out in short,, quick puffs.
I hated Mayor Baxter and his snooty wife. I really did. They scared me. Not for my sake. Crap, I didn’t care what they did to me. They couldn’t do anything to me I hadn’t been through ten times before. But I didn’t want them screwing with Drew anymore. Or the Coulters.
Which brought me to this: John and Paula were at the meet to support Drew today. They’d even brought the younger kids, who held red and grey pendants and called out “go Baxter” whenever Drew swam in a race. Part of me was grateful and sort of moved that they cared enough about him—and me—to come but another part of me was completely sick with worry.
Really, guys? Today of all days to show up?
The voice on the loudspeaker announced the next race, and Drew stood up and cast quick smile at me over his shoulder. He peeled off his tee shirt and tossed it back to the staging area, then strode to his chair behind the blocks.
Though at first I’d been sort of mortified seeing him in such a puny swimsuit, I was used to it now and kind of enjoyed the view. His muscles were carved into his arms and abs nicely, making him look older and way tougher. No wonder all of the guys at school respected him so much. He appeared perfectly capable of kicking someone’s ass if the situation warranted it.
Only I knew what a marshmallow Drew was on the inside.
Mac leaned in close. “High alert. Mayor Douche-canoe keeps looking over his shoulder at us.”
I followed his line of sight, and sure enough, Drew’s dad shot a glare over his shoulder at me with enough voltage to bust through the cinder block wall behind us. “He’d better be careful. One of his fans might catch him giving us a dirty look, and then he’d have to explain himself.”
It made me feel better knowing that the Baxters didn’t like Mac anymore than they liked me. Though Mac acted like he couldn’t care less, his face tensed up when the good Mayor showed up. I don’t think it made him very proud to know that his dad was half the reason Drew’s dad got away with being a bastard all the time.
“He’d probably make up some long story about how two teenage thugs were doing drugs at the swim meet,” Mac proposed with a frown. “And he is now initiating a new Just Say No program at the high school.”
“Ah.” I swallowed back the bile in my throat. Mayor Baxter really did make me sick to my stomach. “Turning a negative into a positive. What a guy.”
“He’s been doing it to me since I was twelve.” Mac bumped shoulders with me. “You’ll get used to it.”
I laughed wryly. You’d think I already would be.
I’d stopped wishing for a different life a long time ago. After my Aunt Lisa adopted Rory and Julian, but sent me packing, and my next several foster homes adopted every kid they got except me, I’d decided I probably wouldn’t get my happily ever after all. And for the most part, I was used to it. But I wasn’t gonna lie. It would’ve been nice to be accepted by Drew’s parents.
“I thought your dad and Mayor Baxter were friends.” I frowned down at Drew’s parents. “You’d think he would love you.”
Mac shook his head. “Not exactly. My parents have been divorced for a couple years. I live with my mom, and she’s not a fan. That makes the Baxters hate me. I guess it’s a loyalty thing.”
“Do you think they’ll back off Drew after the season?” I asked.
“I hope so, for Drew’s sake.” Mac put his fingers in his mouth and released a shrill whistle as the crowd cheered. “My mom keeps offering to let Drew move in with us for the rest of the school year, but he’s afraid the Mayor will sabotage his ride at U-Dub if he does. His dad’s on the alumni board.”
“Figures.” I practically snarled at the back of Mayor Baxter’s head. “Drew will be trapped with his parents until graduation.”
“Probably. What about you?” Mac asked. “Where are you headed after graduation?”
“I have no idea,” I confessed, resting my chin on my hand and watching the Coulters cheering with their pendants below us. Paula spotted me watching her and waved. My chest warmed, and I offered her a smile. “I used to think I’d just get the hell out of here, but now I’m not so sure.”
As soon as I said the words, I realized how true they were. I wasn’t sure what the city held for me anymore.
The fifty-meter fly ended, and Drew’s last race was called. He slid his cap and goggles on, adjusting them as he stretched his arms. If he won this race, he would go to the semi-finals, which would likely lock him in to, at the very least, a partial scholarship. Drew said if he won the state title, he would undoubtedly get the free ride.
My heart started to pound as the swimmers took their mark, then dove into the water like flesh-colored streaks. “Come on, come on, come on…” I mumbled to myself as Drew arched out of the water again and again. The muscles cording his arms flexed as he rotated them in a full circle from one end of the pool to the other. It was like watching an engine, while the sound of the crowd cheering him on turned into a buzz in my ears.
The time went by so fast. It always did. And sure enough, Drew won by another tenth of a second. The audience jumped to their feet, c
heering and waving their red and silver signs. John turned around and gave me a thumbs-up while the kids all danced around him, and I returned the gesture.
Mac cupped his hands around his mouth. “Good job, Baxter! Woo hoo!”
Covering my ears to dull the roar, I said, “I think we should wait up here. I don’t want more trouble from you know who.”
“Yeah. Probably.” Mac stuck both of his middle fingers up at the back of the Mayor’s head, making a few spectators turn and glare at us.
“Crap!” Snorting, I shoved his hands back down. Drew jumped out of the pool and scanned the crowd for us, and I added, “We should wait for him out back by the busses.”
“Good idea. I’ll let him know.” Mac pulled out his phone and started texting. “Any chance your sister might want to meet us for, I dunno, a burger, or whatever? You know, if she isn’t busy or something.”
“I don’t know. Why don’t you call and ask her?” I laughed when the usually cocky and jovial Mac looked like he wanted to puke. “I don’t have a phone. I’m sorry.”
“Who doesn’t have a phone in this day and age?” he called as I stepped down the risers toward the Coulters. “I’ll meet you out back in five.”
“Got it.” Before I knew what was happening, Paula swept me into a hug. I stiffened, unsure what to do. I didn’t… we didn’t… I wasn’t the hugging type. But then it dawned on me that Paula was just happy about the race, so I put my arms around her and patted her back awkwardly. “Oh. Hey. Thanks for coming.”
“He did it!” She squealed, pulling away. “I’m so proud of him.”
John put his arm around her shoulders. “You tell Drew he had us on the edge of our seats. He kicked butt.”
“Kicked butt!” Bellowed Cooper, while he lined up his toy cars on the bleachers. “Kicked butt. Kicked butt.”
“Great. Thanks for enlightening our son’s vocabulary.” Paula elbowed her husband playfully, then beamed at me. “You look pretty today. I didn’t get to see you before you left for school. I love seeing you pull your hair back from your face sometimes.”