by P. S. Power
Except that he'd never want the job, and couldn't have done it anyway. Not as long as all the nobles in Noram were who and what they had to be.
Bowing low, Tor stopped. The rest of it, he could kind of see for himself. His roommate at school thinking that he loved him, because to him, Tor was brilliant and great, just because. Even if everyone else thought that Tor had to be doing something sexual to keep his attention.
Or how Trice always felt entitled to just go through his things and take what she wanted. She loved him, in a confused and convoluted way, but it wasn't real love. That hurt a bit, but he got it. To her he was a favorite pet and useful tool, but that was all he really could be. It had been there for years, worked into what she'd said and done, but he didn't have context for it at all.
Ali...
That one had been all him, hadn't it? He suggested that he marry her, to protect her from her insane and evil father. Which was why Green agreed, no doubt, knowing that anyone he picked would always be a partner in his mind, not a master, even if she did end up closer to seven feet tall than not.
"You know what?" The words were light and almost carefree as they left his lips.
The King suddenly looked bemused, rather than as down as he was, seeing the large smile on Tor's face.
"No?"
"We should tell everyone that I resigned because of the lazy High Servants. Set a precedent. Maybe you should hit me a few times before I go?"
"Good plan, but we have luncheon and Connie would kill me if I did that. Especially since we already used that trick once with Tiera. Do you know she had George beat her, to make it look like Count Lairdgren and I were angry with her? I had to sleep with one eye open for a week, for fear Connie was going to cut off parts while I slept."
It was kind of funny, so they were laughing as they left the room, even though only the guards in the wall saw them doing it.
In the dining room they found Connie sitting with her sister and, naturally enough, Trice, who smiled at him happy as soon as he came in. Richard had a place at the head of the table, so Tor worked in next to her, which got a fond wave of emotion to move across her. It was a bit more intense than he'd thought she felt about him, to tell the truth.
"I didn't know you were here, or even in the Capital. I was afraid that I'd missed you. Are you staying the night? We could get together and chat about things. We haven't done that in a long time. Not since Austra really."
When he'd been attacked by a decently sized army of Larval Assassins. Right, how could he forget that? They'd been near each other a few times and even spoken, but she was right, they hadn't really talked about things. He seemed to remember mentioning that he loved her. He did, even now, but she wasn't right for him. It wasn't fair, but if he was with her for too long, she'd end up owning him, even if he had been wrong about how she really felt. A bit.
"That would be fun, but I have to go back to Lairdgren tonight. I've been invited to Austra, of all places, tomorrow. Brown says he has the threat taken care of, so I need to go and see if it really is. Timon agrees with him, so it's probably safe."
She seemed a little sad, but didn't let that stop her.
"I'm busy myself, but perhaps in a few days? Or whenever you get back?"
"We're having a little get together in a few days at Ali's house, the one at the school? You could stay for a bit if you have the time? Gerent can come too. Or, well, maybe not. He's working too now. I forgot to give him his new pumps for watering plants. Silly of me."
That, oddly enough, seemed to be a mistake to mention, since Mercy, Trice's mother and Connie's older sister, heard what he meant and insisted they all run outside for a demonstration. That didn't take too long, since they just went to the pond garden for it, but she seemed way too pleased to see it for something casual. The woman clearly had something in mind for the device already.
There was clapping involved, and everything.
"How much do they run? With something like this we could water several hundred trees in dry conditions. Can it be hooked in to one of your wonderful rivers?" Her eyes were a cool blue but stood out a lot more than they normally did for some reason. Probably because she was staring at him.
Normally he would have just dug in his case and handed her a bunch of the things, but he understood that doing so wouldn't make her like him more, and would just make her feel indebted to someone so far below her that it would be almost ridiculous.
"I already have a sales agent for those. Sara Debri is handling the line personally. I believe she's in town, at the official house, for the next few days, if you want to find out more? Get them early, because I won't be making a lot of things for a while." The words got the King to smile, but he didn't ruin the surprise.
As they worked their way back inside they were met by Princess Karina and Prince Alphonse. They both looked good. Taller than they had been, but what were they going to do, they weren't Royal giants because of the size of their heads after all.
"Hey, people." The Prince seemed to think it was a pleasant enough surprise at least. "Have you come to resign Tor? That High Servant thing..." The words were playful, since he, acting earlier aside, had clearly caught the game of it.
"Actually I have. It's been accepted as well. Once again I'm just Tor Baker. I have to imagine that's going to keep me from all the good parties, but, you know, fewer fights that way."
The King cleared his throat.
"Countier Baker. If honor requires you to let that title go as well you'll have to address the matter with your grandfather."
Then, for some reason, everyone at the table started talking at once, except Karina. She watched Tor carefully, her eyes going soft and considering. Very softly she mouthed a single word.
"Good."
Trice caught it though, and turned on her as if it were time for fighting instead of the opening wine. Tor actually took a bit, but indicated he only wanted a few sips, to try it. He waited though, in case they were going with the most polite rules, and checked it covertly with a poison detector, just in case they weren't.
"What do you mean, good! He has titles and power, he can't just give that away! Uncle Richard, you can't let him do it!"
Everyone went quiet and the King chuckled, then smiled fondly at Trice.
"Can't I? More to the point, should I really try to stop him? In my time as King, only two men have never come to me to seek improvement in station. Smythe of Westend, and Torrance Baker. I responded to that fact by heaping honors on both, and have come to realize that it isn't always an easy thing at all. Smythe and Tor are, in their own ways, both men of uncountable honor and courage. In many ways they're similar. Both have sought no great benefit from their titles, though most would have instantly turn them to their own profit, or use them to garner more power and position. Now, tired and weary of the world I thrust upon him, Tor comes to me and asks for release from that. I won't deny him his wish. I don't have that right." There was a seated bow then and a glance at his son, for some reason.
Probably because he was nodding along now.
"That makes sense. So, what do you plan to do Tor? Set up a magic shop? A studio to create wonders the likes of which no one can even imagine yet?" There was a bit of sadness in the words, but it was a small thing. Probably because to his mind Tor was giving the presents back. Kind of rude and hurtful of him when looked at in that light, wasn't it.
Too bad. He had to stand firm.
"Nope. I have a few more things to do and then I have to stop building too. Or at least make people think I've retired from it. Make less, and start working under a second name maybe? It's... complicated, but the short answer is, that if I keep doing what I have been I'll end up destroying the world. Most likely at least. I'm not willing to risk it." Looking at the now tall and very thin redheaded Princess he winked. "Don't worry though, I'll still make things when the mood strikes me, to keep my hand in. Then hide them away for special occasions. Do what Maris does and only make one or two original pieces a year fo
r sale. Really though, I'm thinking of a bakery." Waiting for scorn was harder than it seemed like it should be, but instead of telling him it was nonsense Mercy took a sip of her wine, but just enough to wet her lips a little.
"Well, I'm sure you'll be among the best at it then." She lifted the crystal goblet and saluted him with it. "To your success."
Connie followed her lead, hiding the pain she felt. To her mind this was all about her driving him away, being too... related to him for things to work out. It wasn't exactly a big shock, but she'd hoped they could be close. And still have sex, be lovers and all that, in time.
Which was gross enough that Tor was glad she didn't get to mention it out loud.
There were limits to what he was going to be pushed into after all, and if she really ordered him to do that, he might. Then he'd have to kill himself in shame, which would tick Cordes right the hell off.
'That's true. I'll try to keep that from happening, after all I hate dying. It's my third least favorite thing. Right behind goats cheese, and people that think they know what I'm thinking, when they don't.'
The rest of the meal went smoothly enough, and when it ended Connie didn't even force him to try and dodge her, just leaving the room with her sister.
The King had a meeting and that left just the younger people, which wasn't an accident, he didn't think.
Trice started in on him almost instantly, her voice firm and a little angry sounding. "Tor, go tell Uncle Richard that you didn't mean it. People work all their life for titles like that. They made up a counselor's position for you! That's huge! Please, go do it. Then we can go and have some celebratory sex."
That got Karina to rise and move her chair to the side. Her clothing also shifted to fighting leathers, which got her cousin to go wide eyed, getting the implied threat. They were both smart girls after all.
"No. I won't let you do that to him Trice, this is his choice. Leave it alone."
Trice moved around, putting her hand on his shoulder gently.
"Come on Tor, this is too important, I know that you'll see it my way..."
Except, while he felt the pull of it, he still managed to pull away from her.
"Not this time Trice. I know about that now. Burks had to tell me the other day. Now I can't help notice it when people are doing that to me. Or at least that's what I'm telling myself. That's why I'm resigning in part. This isn't something I'm doing lightly you know. Now, don't do that again or... well, I won't be able to be around you anymore."
That got her to sit back, looking suddenly worried. She didn't feel it though, her conniving mind was working out how to do the same thing, only more subtly. It was too useful having little builder Tor around. Plus he was good in bed. Picking up that last bit was nice to know, but the rest was hard. She wasn't really saying, or even thinking, that he was just a way to get things for free, but there was a clear undertone to what she believed that made that part of the whole thing, real love for him or not.
Tor could put up with that part though. Most people liked to get free things. It was that she immediately tried to come up with ways to thwart what he wanted, rather than trying to accept that he had a right to be a free person. Confrontation was no fun though, so he started to just withdraw, move into a meditative state and let it go. Then took a deep breath and made eye contact with Trice. Her hair its normal deep brown curls again. She was very pretty, but he could feel a lot about her that she didn't know he could perceive. How hurt and afraid she was, after the rape, for instance. It was why she'd been avoiding Gerent, even though she knew it was hurting him.
She was afraid though, because she didn't love the little man. He just wasn't attractive to her. He was, in her eyes, ugly and deformed. One part of her didn't care that she couldn't return his feelings, and another was certain that it meant she was worse than a Doretta. That she was a monster. Now Tor was leaving? Pulling away from her and she couldn't stop him at all. It wasn't fair.
She loved him after all, and being who he was, he had to return those feelings. It was the natural order.
Tor grunted.
"Not anymore Trice. Besides, there's nothing natural about it. Still, I'm your friend, and I do love you, I have for a long time. I just won't let you own me. If you want to be in my life, then be in my life, you know, like a normal person?"
"Alright." She sounded meek, which part of him didn't want to believe, but it was real enough. She was a lot more afraid of losing him than he was of her not being his friend, he realized. After all, in a very real way, he was used to that kind of thing. Being alone like that. So was she, but they handled it in totally different ways. He worked all the time and she... tried to get people to love her. Only that almost never lasted, because sex wasn't love.
"Good, glad to hear it. Now, I need to go and talk to my wife and see if she's going to take a knife to me for this. If not, then off to see Denno tomorrow. After that I really don't know at all. Find a place that needs a decent baker and set up shop I guess? Maybe with a tiny shop alongside to use as a studio? Possibly not though. I don't want to steal Debbie's idea after all." That reminded him that a few people were counting on him to provide magical devices for them to sell. He'd have to make certain they had things. The Group could do that though.
Really, it was a pretty good plan.
He kissed Trice like they were still lovers, which was his plan, if he could swing it, and gave Karina a kiss on the cheek that was probably too close to mixing his signals. They were, as she'd pointed out, not so close they couldn't get married under the noble rules, sort of cousins or not. To her mind that probably meant they were still going to do things in the future. Tor wasn't so certain, but didn't want to insult her either. It might pay to have her as a friend someday. Like if he needed a place to stay after Ali kicked him out.
The Prince walked him to the side door of the Palace, where the transports normally landed. Nothing was there at the moment, so there was plenty of space for his Fast Carriage. He made it glow a little more brightly and tried to remember not to get in trouble with the City Guard from now on. Hours ago he'd been the kingdom's Magic Counselor. Now he was just Tor again. Well, he'd done that before, so he figured it would be manageable.
"So... Tor." His giant friend reached down and hugged him, hard and with a bit more warmth than was correct for two men, but there was a sense of desperation, rather than desire in it. "Why do I feel like this is the end? That you're never coming back or something?"
Tilting his head Tor gave a lopsided grin.
"Probably because you know the kind of hours a working baker has to keep. If you want to see me I suggest frequent visits." It was a joke, but this wasn't an ending at all. It was the beginning of him learning to be himself. Finally.
"Heh, and here I am, stuck here, being the Heir. What if I need my friend though? What if everything starts to fall apart, who will I call on then?"
"Me of course. You can be the first Prince in history to call on your friend the country baker for assistance. I can bring treats to all the emergencies. It will be fine."
They went on like that for a while, but in the end, Tor had to leave. That was just the way things like that went. Almost everything from his old life had an answer now, and some things never would. That was the way of the world.
As he flew back, Tor wondered what the next day would bring, but he already knew.
Peace.
Laughing he shook his head at the joke. Peace? With all those Austrans taking his likeness down on their compacts and trying to interview him for some reason? He wondered how much the information that he was a nobody now would impact that? It might be fun to try he decided.
He nearly called Burks and mentioned that he was quitting the whole Countier thing, but that would be cruel to Ali. It was one thing not to be a Knight, or the Magics Counselor, but that bit was what meant she was married to a noble. If he took that away there wouldn't be any reason for her to stick around at all. Not that way. Maybe for love, but he wasn't as c
ertain of that as he might have been. Really, he tried not to read her overly most of the time. It seemed unfair somehow. Like cheating in school or something, seeing the answers when the other person in the relationship couldn't.
Then again, it really took some of the guess work out of things, and he was at a disadvantage that way. The old, and now broken Rhetistics had left him blind to about half of what people did in regards to him. It also had forced him to feel ugly and stupid, which now he understood was for a reason. It was so he wouldn't value himself at all.
Burks had done that to him, but honestly Tor doubted he could understand it that way. The real blame belonged to some scientists thousands of years before. It was a little too late to be bothered to hate them now though, so he let it go. The biological part of it was bad enough, but an information field, or whatever it really was, that forced him to be a slave was even worse. Now he had at least a small chance.
He didn't bother landing at the house though, knowing that his own nerves about telling his wife about all he'd given up that day was too much to put off. If they were going to have a fight, it might as well be handled as quickly as possible. To that end he took an extra five minutes getting his floating trunk out of his Fast Carriage in the school commons, and taking it down with slow and controlled movements, until he realized it was starting to draw attention. Even strangers were realizing it seemed strange.
Right.
Off to face his fate, whatever that was.
When he knocked on the room that Ali shared with Sherri he heard a familiar-ish giggling, the one that normally meant his wife was entertaining a friend, or possibly two. It was a flustered Sherri that came to the door though, blushing when she saw him.
"Ah... Ali isn't here right now Tor... She's over at your house, working. We didn't know if you'd be home tonight, so..." She had all her clothing on at least. Whatever she and the person with her had been doing it wasn't his business. In fact, it was probably a good thing. Sherri deserved friends, she was a nice person and the noble rules kind of encouraged her to have about as much sex as her body and schedule would handle. Almost a job requirement.