by Suzi Davis
My nights might have been completely peaceful and restful if not for Sebastian’s fitful sleep. He awoke me several times each night, tossing and turning, sometimes moaning in pain or fear. At other times he would awake with tears already sliding down his cheeks, terrified and ashamed of what he had faced in the nightmares from his past. He stoically refused to speak of these dreams, his expression instantly darkening if I so much as mentioned them. No matter how he pretended to dismiss them, I knew his nightmares haunted him throughout the days too. I couldn’t help but be aware that each day he laughed a little less, each smile seemed a little more forced. His lack of sleep combined with his near-constant headaches led to even more periods of confusion and disorientation… it was truly terrifying. I felt like Sebastian was slipping away from me right before my eyes and there was nothing I could do to save him. My fear for him motivated me even more to learn to use my magic. I wanted so badly for the nightmare we were living in to be over, to be safe, for his pain and suffering to end… but it didn’t.
Three days after leaving the park we started to see signs of civilization. We crossed a worn dirt road that appeared to have recent tire tracks on it. A few hours later we came across an old hunting cabin and as the day went on, we started to find more man-made trails and tracks. It wasn’t long before we found ourselves on another dirt road that eventually turned to pavement. We followed along its side warily, noting the appearance of telephone poles and the sounds of distant traffic and even passing a few long and winding driveways that led off into the depths of the woods. When we stopped for a quick lunch of wild mushrooms, berries and some fish Sebastian had caught and cooked the day before, I reluctantly pulled a thin, long-sleeved shirt from my backpack. Sebastian watched in amusement as I pulled it on overtop of my tank top, covering up the black, twisting design of the tattoo that encircled the length of my arm. It wasn’t really necessary; why bother hiding from people who could find us easily and effortlessly if they really wanted to? But it made me feel better. I was still self-conscious about the strange, dark design and was especially aware of the way other people reacted to it. Sebastian left his matching tattoo uncovered, snaking down from beneath his t-shirt sleeve to where it coiled around his wrist and thumb, and twisted into the palm of his hand. Ever since I bore the mark of the Binding too, he seemed almost proud of the odd design.
It wasn’t long after lunch that we found ourselves at the side of a main road. The rush and noise of the cars and trucks that passed us was disorienting after nearly two weeks in the peace of the wilderness. I found myself flinching from the sound and speed of each vehicle that passed us by. A bright green sign just close enough for us to read announced the road to be Highway 588. Another sign just below it read Thunder Bay: 70km.
“Well, I guess we’re on the right path,” I commented in the quiet that followed a big-rig’s passing. A swirl of dust and debris hit me in the face as I spoke and I found myself spitting out bits of grit.
“Was there any doubt?” Sebastian teased. He didn’t smile though, his voice sounding strangely flat. His eyes didn’t sparkle today, they looked as gray and empty as an overcast sky. Worry and nausea settled over me; I tried to push it away.
Sebastian began walking down the side of the highway. I jogged to catch up to his side, tucking the strands of hair that had come loose from my ponytail back behind my ears.
“Are we going to follow the highway now?” I was surprised he’d want to. Over the past few days he’d felt the distance between us and the four Others growing but they could catch up to us easily and quickly once they reached the main road.
“No, I don’t think we should walk anymore,” he answered. He spun around as he spoke so that he was facing me and continued to slowly walk backwards beside me, a small smile pulling up the corners of his mouth.
“Then what…?”
I didn’t get to finish my question. As a vehicle approached from behind me, Sebastian grinned and stuck out his thumb, waving to the driver in a friendly and quite charming manner.
“Sebastian – we are not hitch hiking! It’s dangerous and it’s illegal,” I objected. Sebastian’s grin deepened at my words, his cheek dimpling and his eyes laughing at me.
“People hitch rides every day, Gracelynn. Relax. We’ll be fine and it’s the fastest – not to mention cheapest, way to get to Thunder Bay.”
My stomach bubbled nervously as the truck Sebastian had been waving to slowed down and pulled over on the roadside just ahead of us. It was an old, black Chevy with a small cab and a very large and hairy dog sitting on the front seat beside the driver. The driver himself climbed out, a very large man in worn-out jeans and a t-shirt even more stained than my own. His cheeks were bright red either from sunburn or alcohol. I certainly hoped it was just from the sun.
“Where are you youngsters headin’?” he yelled, lighting a cigarette as he waited for us to catch up.
Sebastian started to jog towards him, I had no choice but to follow.
“Thunder Bay,” Sebastian called back as he jogged.
“Sebastian, I really don’t like this,” I objected under my breath but before he could answer the man called out again.
“Well, you’re in luck! Headin’ that way myself. Not much room in the cab but you’re welcome to ride in the back if you don’t mind the breeze,” the man offered. His voice was gruff but friendly enough. We were close enough now that I could really see his face and there did seem to be a genuine kindness that brightened his hazel eyes. The man looked us over briefly, his eyes lingering on me for slightly longer than Sebastian. I knew I looked very different than I had a few months ago, tanned, athletic and dirty with my short, shaggy hair and torn jeans. But still, I was surprised by the way the man’s near-indifference injured my pride and made me automatically smooth my hair and stand up a little straighter.
Sebastian paused at the truck’s back bumper, turning towards me in time to catch a quick flash in my eyes. “We don’t have to, if you really don’t want to,” he quietly offered. His expression was hopeful but I knew he’d accept whatever answer I gave. It was so hard to say ‘no’ to him.
“I guess it’s better than walking,” I grumbled.
Sebastian grinned. “After you,” he said, gesturing elegantly to the truck bed as he spoke. I rolled my eyes but smiled anyway, wondering how he worked his charm so easily.
“Thanks! We really appreciate the ride, sir,” Sebastian told the man as he climbed up and into the truck beside me. We both took off our packs and Sebastian immediately began pulling our bedroll apart, using the folded tarpaulin as a seat for us with the truck’s cab to lean against and the remaining two blankets ready to protect us from the highway’s wind, even though it was a hot and sunny day.
“No problem. Ain’t no hair off my back. Just knock on the window if you need anything, otherwise it’s straight to Thunder Bay from here. I’ll get ya there in under two hours - might need to stop for gas soon but we’ll see.”
“That sounds perfect. Thanks,” Sebastian repeated.
The large man grunted in response, ground out his cigarette beneath his boot and then heaved himself back into the cab, the whole truck shifting with his weight. The big dog that looked like some kind of wolf cross-breed barked at us from the front seat. I winced as the man reached over and smacked it before throwing his indicator on and pulling back out onto the road.
It was a good thing Sebastian had the blankets out and ready because within minutes the wind was whipping at my legs. The wind felt pleasant and warm enough that at first it didn’t bother me but that didn’t last long. Soon I was wrapped up tight under a blanket and was comfortable enough to doze against Sebastian’s side.
I awoke just as we were entering the outskirts of the town of Thunder Bay. It was amazing to see so much traffic and so many buildings when just this morning we had been out in the middle of nowhere still. I was surprised the noise of the traffic hadn’t woken me sooner but it was actually the sound of Sebastian’s voice ye
lling through the small slider window to our driver that I woke up to.
“We’re going on to Toronto from here – we’ve got friends who live there,” I heard Sebastian lie.
“Well, you can’t hitch all the way to Toronto from here, it’d be a whole night and day of driving and that’s if you found a ride for the whole way,” the man drawled. I almost had to strain to understand him as he pronounced Toronto more like Taranna. “You wanna be dropped off at the bus depot? There’s one not too far from here and there’s a bus that’ll be headin’ out to Toronto either tonight or in the mornin’.”
“That’d be great. Thank you!” Sebastian called back through the glass. That seemed to end the conversation between the two as the glass slid shut with a snap.
Sebastian turned to me as I sat up, noticing that I was awake.
“We’re almost there,” he announced with a quick smile.
“I heard,” I answered. The speed limit had gone down since we were nearing the city and it was easy to speak over the wind now. I pushed the blanket down so that it only covered my legs, letting the sun’s warmth soak into my browned and freckled skin. My mother would have a heart attack if she saw how ‘rugged’ I’d become, I thought wryly.
“Do you really think we should take a bus?”
Sebastian shrugged. “We might as well try it. I’m surprised we were even able to hitch a ride, to be honest. I thought the Others would be wanting to slow us down more. Maybe we’ll be able to catch a bus too.”
“Maybe,” I agreed somewhat doubtfully. “I’ve got my wallet still – I should be able to pay for the fees with my credit card at least. How much do you think it’ll be?”
“I’ve no idea,” Sebastian replied. “Some prices are steeper than you think,” he added ominously, a strange far-away look taking over his expression.
I wasn’t certain how to respond, so I didn’t. I was relieved when a few minutes later he reached over to link his fingers through mine, squeezing my hand affectionately. My heart glowed with a warmth that matched the sun’s golden rays.
We reached the bus depot about twenty minutes later. It was significantly larger and busier than I’d expected but apparently Thunder Bay was quite a large town and this was just one of the three busy bus stations. For someone who’d lived such an indulgent life, I’d spent surprisingly little time exploring my own country. I had been on a year-long exchange in Germany when I was fifteen that I had hoped would be an exciting year abroad but had been just another extension of my sheltered, upper-class life. I’d traveled with my parents on “family” vacations to Hawaii, France, Greece, the Bahamas and even Japan but the only time I’d ever traveled out of British Columbia (and still within Canada) was on a school trip to Ottawa. We had toured the parliament buildings and driven into Quebec City for a day but had explored surprisingly little of the province and I had seen basically nothing else of southern Ontario and Quebec.
The man was smoking another cigarette when he dropped us off at the bus depot, not bothering to get out of the cab this time. We both thanked him heartily enough and Sebastian even reached in to shake his hand through the window, causing the dog to bark again which earned him another hard smack. I was happy to have our hitch-hiking experience behind us, feebly hoping that it would be the last time I’d ever hitch a ride.
We dodged a bus pulling out of the large parking lot as we walked towards the main building. There were several long Greyhound buses parked in front of the long, navy blue building, some unloading passengers and luggage, others looking like they were preparing to embark. Unfortunately, none of the displays on the front of the buses were lit up to announce where they were going or even where they’d come from. I could only hope that one would be heading to Toronto, and soon.
Inside the busy bus station we had to line up behind the other ten or so people already waiting in front of the Departures counter. As “luck” would have it, the line moved quickly and steadily; it was only a matter of minutes before we’d reached the front.
I let Sebastian do all the talking, letting out only the faintest sigh of relief when the woman behind the counter said that there was a bus leaving at 9:10 that night (in just a few short hours) that also just happened to have two seats still available on it. The cost of the last-minute tickets was nearly $300. I made the purchase on my credit card, not caring that my mother and the Others would be able to trace the transaction. Hopefully, by the time anyone realized we were in Toronto, we’d be long gone.
We waited inside the noisy, air-conditioned bus depot under glaring fluorescent lights. It was hard to get comfortable on the hard, plastic chairs. Sebastian was fidgety and unexpectedly anxious the whole while, glancing nervously at the door every time it swung open or closed. I could see the effort he put forth to appear calm and relaxed, joking casually about the different characters we saw and speculating on who they were and where they might be going. It was all an act, the unease and tension clear in Sebastian’s troubled eyes.
It was quieter once we boarded the bus, almost two hours later. Most of the passengers immediately settled down, tilting their seats as far back as they could and pulling out books, headphones and even blankets. Some spoke quietly, their voices murmuring back and forth in a low buzz, the details of their words indistinguishable above the bus’s idling engine.
We sat together in two empty seats near the front of the bus, Sebastian insisting I take the window seat so I wasn’t jostled by people coming down the aisle.
“What’s going on?” I asked him in a low voice once we were settled into our seats, our backpacks stuffed under our chairs.
He turned to me with an all-too-innocent expression on his face, denials ready on his lips. Something about my expression made him hesitate. I could almost see the words changing upon his tongue.
“Something’s… not quite right,” he finally admitted. He frowned as he spoke, the words obviously not accurately expressing whatever it was that he was feeling. He closed his eyes tightly, tipping his head back with a weary sigh. “The fifth is getting closer – and fast. The Others appear to be increasing their pace too. I can sense them all so clearly now, it’s almost like they want me to know that they’re closing in on us.”
I couldn’t prevent the soft gasp from escaping my lips as he spoke. An ice cold chill ran down my spine and gripped my heart with sudden fear. Sebastian’s eyes flew open, his hands instantly reaching for me.
“It’s alright, please don’t be afraid,” he urged, one warm hand tightly holding mine, the other gently cupping my face. “We’re still ahead of them. We’ll be in Toronto by six o’clock tomorrow evening and then we’ll find your father. It’ll all be alright from there.” His steady confidence and soothing voice slowly settled over me like a wave of calm. I squeezed his hand back, resting my head against his shoulder as I forced myself to relax.
“I hope you’re right.”
I wasn’t certain if the calmness that had chased away my fears was a result of my own emotions, Sebastian’s magic or just exhaustion. Either way, my current lack of fear felt false, like I was somehow lying to myself. I certainly wasn’t relaxed enough to fall asleep anytime soon even though my muscles ached wearily from the weeks of travel. Luckily, Sebastian seemed to sense my need for a distraction.
I reopened my eyes as he slowly turned my hand over in his. The bus had just finished boarding and the driver was pulling the doors closed. I took no interest in looking out the window. I didn’t care to see the navy blue bus depot disappear or the new sights that Thunder Bay might have to offer. My attention was solely focused on Sebastian and the slow, deliberate shapes he was tracing into the palm of my hand, right over top of the beginning of the black marks from the Binding.
I wasn’t certain what he was doing at first. I glanced up at him to see a small but tender smile on his face and a bright sparkle in his eyes that seemed to make the faint tint of blue glow brighter in their gray depths. My heart beat faster with each twisting, tickling stroke of his finge
r in my hand. I smiled as I realized what he was doing.
“What are you spelling?”
His smile deepened to a playful grin. I turned my body towards him even more, full of curiosity. The rest of the bus and the world seemed to disappear far beyond us as I was completely entranced by the natural magic of Sebastian.
“You should be paying more attention, Gracelynn,” he teased.
I snorted softly and indignantly, smiling all the while.
“Do it again?” I asked sweetly, glancing up through my eyelashes at him.
He laughed quietly, shaking his head. “You don’t need magic to get what you want.”
I smiled back. “Funny. I was just thinking the same thing.”
We stared into each other’s eyes for a moment, the playful mood between us slipping slightly as we each read the intensity in one another. Sebastian was the first to look away as he slowly began spelling out more letters into the palm of my hand.
I-L-O-V-E-Y-O-U
“I love you too,” I whispered.
He smiled and lifted my hand, gently and tenderly kissing the center of my palm before he laid it back on my lap and began writing out more letters.
W-I-L-L-Y-O-U-M-A-R-R-Y-M-E-?
My heart skipped a beat even though I knew he was just teasing me.
“Is that really how you’re going to propose?”
He grinned. “Is that really how you’re going to answer?”
I paused, briefly contemplating, then picked up his hand and began slowly writing my answer into the palm of his.
N-O.
He laughed out loud, seemingly delighted by my response.
“Are you saying ‘no’ to the first question or the second?”
“The second,” I answered without hesitation.