by Karen Duvall
“I know you can reach her, Aydin. You’re the only one who can bring her back. Plus she’s our key to learning who’s murdering the knights.”
Though he couldn’t speak in his current state, his body language let me know he was eager to help. He waved a beastly paw toward the house. I preceded him inside and he followed me up the stairs.
The others were waiting for us and when they saw me, their eyes jerked in their sockets as they looked around for what they couldn’t see. But my grandmother saw him. She blinked and placed her hand flat against her chest.
“Is it here?” Xenia asked, appearing more eager than fearful. So she wasn’t as repulsed as she’d led us to believe.
“Aydin is with us, yes,” I said in a strained voice.
She retreated toward the window and pressed her back against the wall, feigning disgust.
I rolled my eyes at Xenia, then looked at my grandmother. “Can he try now?” I asked her, and she nodded, eyes closed as if in prayer, which she might have been.
Aydin’s misty bulk lowered to Natalie’s bed and seemed to melt inside her. Her body shifted and her closed eyelids twitched. Something was happening but it was impossible to know exactly what. Her lips moved and I leaned in to hear her if she spoke. I opened my auditory senses and tuned out the breathing and heartbeats of everyone else in the room so I could focus just on her.
“She… But that’s impossible,” Natalie muttered.
Her head moved side to side and she moaned.
“Maybe he should stop,” Aurora said. “Natalie is behaving like she’s in pain.”
“She probably is if her conscious mind is buried somewhere. It won’t stop hurting until she comes out.” I leaned in closer. “She’s trying to talk.”
“What’s she saying?” Aurora asked.
“That it’s impossible.”
“What is?”
I shook my head. “I don’t know.”
Natalie’s eyelids squeezed so tight it looked like it hurt. She muttered, “One of us.”
I repeated to my grandmother what she said.
“She lives on the blood of the dark ones.” Natalie gasped. “She’s so old. How did she live so long?”
Again I repeated Natalie’s muttered words and watched my grandmother go pale.
“What is it?” I asked her. “What’s wrong?”
Aurora fanned herself with her hand. “Hot flash.”
I doubted menopause was her problem. Something Natalie just said upset her. “Who do you think she’s talking about?”
“Let’s wait until Natalie is out of the woods, okay?” Aurora began wringing her hands, something I’d never seen her do before.
Though her eyes were still closed, a small smile formed on Natalie’s lips as she whispered, “I don’t know how to thank you. I can’t believe I made it back.”
I heaved a lung-collapsing sigh. “She’ll be okay,” I said to everyone in the room. They all murmured to one another and I made a down motion with my hands to lower their voices.
“She’s back, but I don’t know if she’s fully recovered. We’ll know more after we talk,” I said.
Natalie rolled onto her side and fluttered her eyelids, but didn’t open them. She hugged the blanket close around her shoulders and seemed to nestle deeper into the pillow. And then she was asleep again. I prayed she could wake up on her own.
I watched Aydin’s ghost lift from Natalie’s body. He pointed to himself and then to me before clasping his hands together. He wanted us to merge so he could explain what had happened with Natalie.
Still standing, I closed my eyes and welcomed Aydin in. I felt a rush of warmth and a wave of calmness that made me feel safe, protected. This intimate connection caused my yearning for him to grow even stronger. I struggled not to collapse in a whimpering puddle right in front of everyone in the room.
Her mind is back, but she needs rest, he told me. She’s been through a severe trauma.
So you knocked her out? I asked.
I saw Aydin’s face in my mind and he looked just as handsome as he had before he changed.
In a sense, yes, I knocked her out. She didn’t know what hit her. She’s sleeping normally now and without dreams.
What a relief. So what did she mean about the woman being one of us?
His image appeared troubled. He rubbed his chin and stared as if deep in thought. She didn’t give me a name, which was probably kept from her on purpose. But she managed to see how this creature survived for so long.
How long? I asked.
He paused. Close to a millennium.
And it being one of us means that it, or she, is a Hatchet knight?
He nodded.
Are there many knights left who are that old?
None that I’m aware of, he said. Unless you count Saint Geraldine.
Oh, yes, Geraldine, the one with enchanted remains. But I didn’t really count that as living. Quin and I had rescued her disembodied head from the Vyantara and it was now with the Arelim. Once her body parts were reunited she could become a whole woman again. Finding them was another item on my to-do list.
The old one responsible for the murders was alive and completely whole. I’d seen her standing on two legs, but I supposed anything could have been under the cloak she was wearing.
Did Natalie see her?
Aydin shook his head. If she did, she’s blocked the image from her mind, because all I picked up from her was a dark crystal cave shrouded in fog. That must be the woman’s lair. And I saw the dark ones she shared it with.
I imagined some horrible kind of monster, possibly even the gargoyle assassins the Vyantara used for their dirty work. Or maybe Maågan demons. Natalie had said the woman drank their blood so that gave me a better of idea of what these dark ones could be. The only creatures I knew of that drank blood and lived forever were vampires.
Is she a vampire? I asked Aydin.
He tilted his chin down and gazed at me, eyebrows raised. The blood she drinks doesn’t come from humans. She survives on the blood of the Fallen.
Oh, my God. A good knight turned bad with the help of the Arelim’s estranged dark brothers. Why? And why did she wait until now to reveal herself?
Both good questions, Chalice. I only wish I had the answers. Natalie doesn’t know, either.
A hand shook me gently by the shoulder. I wasn’t ready to leave Aydin. Who knew when I’d get to see him again? He’d done what my grandparents and the Arelim wanted, so now they could shun him. I wouldn’t let that happen.
My trance broken, I popped open my eyes to see my grandmother standing in front of me, her hands grasping me by the shoulders. Getting jerked from my connection to Aydin had given me a pounding headache and I stomped backward to break my grandmother’s hold.
“What?” I barked.
“It’s Xenia,” she said, her eyes holding a mixture of anger and panic. “She’s gone.”
I looked at Aydin’s ghost and watched him shake his large, gargoyle head.
“She was standing right by the window,” I said. “How could she suddenly vanish in a room filled with people?”
“It wasn’t that sudden,” my grandmother said. “You’ve been in a trance for nearly an hour.”
I blinked. It hadn’t felt that long. I glanced around the room and found everyone gone but a sleeping Natalie and my grandmother. “Have you looked everywhere?” I asked.
“Of course.” She sounded annoyed. “And so have the Arelim.”
I thought about the pen charm, but I’d taken it away from Xenia. It was back in the bag where I had stored the charms reserved for the squires.
I ran to the room Xenia and I shared and lifted the mattress from the box spring on my bed. The bag I’d hidden there was gone. Damn it!
“She has the pen charm back,” I told my grandmother through gritted teeth. “And you and I are the only ones who can see her if she uses it.”
“I’ve been watching for a visible Xenia, not an invisible one.” Her
mouth turned down at the corners when she added, “Now that the wards are set to allow ghosts through, she could leave without anyone knowing.”
And that, apparently, was my fault. “You know as well as I do that Aydin had to be allowed in so he could help Natalie.”
Her shoulders lifted and fell with a deep sigh. She rubbed her temples. “Of course I know. I’m not blaming you, I’m just worried about Xenia. She could be the murderer’s next victim.”
I should have felt more concern than I did, but at that moment I was too pissed off. The little thief had lied and stolen from me. She’d reneged on a promise to her sister knights and to the Arelim. I wasn’t sure I’d ever forgive her.
“She can’t have gone very far,” I said. “It’s after midnight and freezing outside. How could she leave without a car?” My heart gave a shudder as I remembered one of the items in the charm bag she’d taken. I slapped a hand against my forehead. “Crap!”
My grandmother frowned. “Zeke and I were just about to head out in Natalie’s Jeep to look for her.”
“I doubt that will do any good,” I said. “Xenia has the flying charm. I’m sure that’s how she got away.”
Aurora nodded as if flying was a perfectly acceptable mode of transportation. I doubt anything surprised her anymore. “I think I know where she went.”
“Home?”
“Yep, back to the city. I bet she’s in Denver by now.”
At least it was a city nearby and not in another state. And if she were in Denver, we had eyes and ears there who could scope out any magical dealings if she tried to sell the charms. Knowing what I knew of Xenia, I believed that’s what she was up to.
My stomach made a little jump as I thought about returning to Denver. I felt a mix of good and bad vibes about that city and some of my memories terrified me. Didn’t matter, I had to go back eventually and now was better than later.
“I’ll find Xenia,” I told my grandmother. And when I did I’d spank her to within an inch of her bratty emo life. “I need to go to Denver anyway. I have to search the Vyantara fatherhouse ruins.” Namely to find whatever charms and curses had survived the fire.
My grandmother shook her head so fast I was afraid she’d knock something loose. “Chalice, you can’t leave.”
“Why not?”
“You know why not.” She began wringing her hands again and started to pace, her steps hard and fast. “It’s too dangerous. The murderer is still out there.”
“I know that, which is why I’m going. Someone has to stop her.”
“That someone doesn’t have to be you.” She stopped moving to give me such a tender, pleading look I was at a loss for words. She took my hand and clasped it between both of hers. “It’s taken so long to finally have you with us,” she said, her eyes brimming. “I lost your mother to violence. I can’t lose you, too.”
My eyes stung and I found it suddenly hard to swallow. “You know the risks to living as we do. I’m sure your mother worried about you the same way.”
“I wouldn’t know,” she said, her voice soft as a whisper. “I never knew her. I was adopted into another Hatchet knight family after she was killed.”
I didn’t know my grandmother had been an orphan. “How old were you?”
She thought for a second. “Four, I think. Maybe five. But I don’t remember anything about my mother. I don’t think she stuck around much when she was alive.”
I had no desire to have children and my grandmother just provided a good reason for that decision. So what if the order needed more knights? The Arelim could collect them from among the whisperers. That’s how the order had begun in the first place.
I pulled my hand from my grandmother’s firm grip. “I realize how hard this is for you, but it’s the only way. We can’t send the squires to Denver, we can’t ask for Rusty’s help while her powers are gone, and Natalie is too weak.”
“I can go,” she said. “I’ll find Xenia myself and take down that bitch who’s murdering our knights.”
I had no doubt she could pull it off, but her job at Halo Home was more important. “Rusty and Natalie need you. So do the squires. And I have connections in the city that you don’t. It’s best that I go.” I let my lips soften into an almost-smile. “You know I’m right.”
A tear slipped free and she hastily swiped at it with the back of her hand. She nodded.
“Quin can take me back with him to Elmo’s,” I said. “I’ll be safe there. And Aydin will come, too.”
I searched the room for Aydin and saw his ghost filling the doorway. My grandmother saw him too because she offered him a grateful smile. “What were you able to learn from Natalie’s memories?” she asked him, though the question was really meant for me since Aydin couldn’t talk. So I told her everything he’d told me. Her face drained of color.
“You know something else, don’t you?” I asked her. “Something Natalie didn’t say.”
“It’s only a suspicion,” she said, the worry lines on her forehead going even deeper. “Natalie never gave a name?”
I looked at Aydin, who shook his head. “No. Aydin thinks it was kept from her on purpose.” But I remembered a name. A name I heard Natalie whisper just after she’d almost suffocated to death. “Does the name Maria ring any bells?” I asked.
My grandmother took a step back and her knees wobbled. Aydin rushed up behind her as if to catch her in case she fell, but she’d just fall through him. He was about as solid as a cloud of fog.
I guided her to my bed and she sat down, her fingers clutching at the neck of her sweater. Her breathing picked up speed and the dark circles beneath her eyes stood out against her pale skin. “I do know of someone named Maria.” Her voice came out ragged, as if she’d run out of breath. “Maria was Saint Geraldine’s daughter.”
Now I remembered where I had heard the name before hearing it from Natalie. Aydin once told me he had helped deliver Geraldine’s baby on the battlefield. That the child’s fallen angel father had tried to force Geraldine into giving her baby to him. When Geraldine was drawn and quartered by the church, it was assumed the village midwife had kept Maria to raise as her own.
“You don’t know that it’s the same Maria,” I said.
“When I was young I heard a rumor that Maria was still alive and living with her father behind the black veil, but I never believed it.” My grandmother hugged herself. “Perhaps I should have.”
If Maria’s father had tried to take her, he probably succeeded after Geraldine’s execution. After getting hacked to pieces there’d have been nothing Geraldine could have done to stop him.
“I need to contact Saint Geraldine,” I said. “It’s possible she can help us find her daughter.”
“I’ve heard of knights going bad before, but nothing like this. Living on the blood of the Fallen?” My grandmother visibly shuddered.
Creepy. And probably dangerous as hell.
If I was to stay in Denver a while, I wasn’t about to leave Shojin’s heart behind. Hidden or not, I needed it for Aydin when he was ready to become human again. As soon as the Hatchet murderer was caught, I would have my man back.
I left my mother’s shield with my grandmother for safekeeping, and I asked her to take care of Ruby for me while I was gone. If anything were to happen to me I wanted to make sure they didn’t fall into the wrong hands. I tossed all my belongings into the canvas bag I’d arrived with and tucked the black fallen angel feather into the side pocket of my coat. What a relief Xenia hadn’t stolen it, too. I wasn’t sure how valuable it was, but it could have hidden properties I had yet to discover. I shrugged on my coat, headed downstairs, and once out in the yard I found the same shovel I’d used to bury the heart. I began digging around the giant roots of the ponderosa tree.
“Need some help?”
I glanced up to see Rafe standing there, his human guise expertly back in place. He’d changed his look from Mr. GQ to stylish mountain man complete with plaid flannel shirt, denim jeans and heavy Sorel boots
. He’d completely bought into the whole manly man thing.
“Thanks, Rafe, but I’m almost done.” I dug the spade in for another scoop of dirt. It was easier than I thought it would be, even after a fresh snowfall.
“Does this mean Aydin has made up his mind?” Rafe asked.
Not that it was any of his business. “Yes, but he’s planning to wait until after we’ve caught the murderer. In the meantime, he thinks he’ll be more helpful as a gargoyle than a human.”
Rafe knelt down to watch me dig. “I understand you’ll stay in Denver awhile.”
Of course he would know my plans already. The Arelim’s network was like a grapevine.
“I will be, yes,” I said.
“Is Aydin coming with you?”
“He’ll help me while I’m there, but I don’t know where he’ll stay.” I dug the spade in deeper and heard it clang against the iron skillet. Jackpot. “The Vyantara may still be looking for him so he’s doing his best to stay out of sight.”
“The fatherhouse is gone,” Rafe said. “There are no Vyantara left in the city.”
“Are you sure about that?”
He huffed. “No.”
“We’re not taking any chances.”
“You could use my help, too, don’t you think?”
I looked up at his face and saw the sincere question in his eyes. He really wanted to be a part of this.
“We can use all the help we can get,” I told him. “I’ll let you know when. But for now we’ll be going places where angels fear to tread.” I grabbed the skillet’s handle and yanked it up out of the hole. And gazed down into empty space.
twelve
“IS SOMETHING WRONG?” RAFE ASKED.
I couldn’t believe it. “Shojin’s heart. It’s gone!”
“Are you sure that’s where you buried it?” he asked, sounding like his usual calm and collected self.
“Of course I’m sure.” I grabbed the skillet and flung it out into the snow. “That little thief took it.”
“What thief?”
“Xenia!” I glared at him. “You do know she’s missing, right?”
“Yes, but we stopped looking when we realized she used the pen charm to hide herself. She’s beyond our capacity to see.”