Amy stared at the rich chocolate frosting. It was so easy to picture Mark as a child, sitting here waiting for his mother to finish her shift. Yes, he’d spent a lot of nights at Darren’s house. But not every night. Before he was old enough to stay home alone, it made sense he’d be here. And he wouldn’t want to draw attention or cause a fuss, not Mark.
She was still staring at the layered cake when Mark returned to his stool. “You haven’t touched it.”
“I need your help,” she said, wishing she could wrap her arms around him and hold him tight until he understood that he was every bit as worthy of recognition, of happiness and of having a place in this world as anyone else.
Amy held out a fork. “Please. I can’t eat this by myself. And I don’t think Blanche will let us leave until we finish.”
“You sure?” he said. “You only ate half your burger.”
“I’m sure.” She dug in, forcing one bite on her full stomach, knowing he wouldn’t touch it until she did. The top layer of icing slipped off her fork, falling down to her chest. The creamy blend of sugar and chocolate slid down, resting on the swell of her breast just above her neckline.
She reached for a napkin, but Mark’s hand trapped hers. She turned to him and caught him staring at her chest.
“Let me,” he said.
His gaze swept the room. Before she could object, he lowered his mouth to her chest, swiftly licking the chocolate buttercream off her skin.
“You taste good,” he said, picking up his fork.
“Everything’s better with chocolate.” Her voice sounded breathless and hungry—but not for cake.
15
FIFTEEN MINUTES LATER, after Mark had polished off the cake and tried to pay for their meal—Blanche had adamantly refused his money—they were back in her truck with Mark behind the wheel. Amy felt as if she would explode. Earlier she’d been too tired for sex, and now she was too full. She remembered how his mouth felt on her skin and...God, she wanted him anyway.
But one more feeling crept up on her, adding to her list of reasons to steer clear of Mark and his mouth. She was scared. The things she’d learned about the friend she’d known her whole life made her realize he deserved more than a no-strings-attached fling. And she couldn’t give him that without breaking her rules and risking her heart.
They pulled into the driveway, and Amy climbed out of the truck without waiting for Mark to come around and open the door. “I should let Bullet and Nova out.”
“I’ll join you.” He easily caught up with her and then slowed his pace to match hers. She stumbled, her heels sinking into the grass. Reaching out to stop herself from falling, she grabbed his arm, solid and strong.
“Stupid shoes,” she muttered, regaining her balance and withdrawing her hand.
“How about a piggyback ride?”
“No.” The heat in his eyes, illuminated by the full moon in the Oregon night sky, was like a warning. “I’ll be fine. I managed all day in these heels.”
“Just to the door.”
Amy looked at the wide expanse of grass between them and the kennel’s entrance, part of it covered by her tent. She ran back and forth dozens of times a day. But tonight, in these shoes, the familiar space looked as if it had expanded while they’d been out to eat.
“I’m wearing a dress,” she said.
“Now that you mention it, I’m going to insist.” Mark stepped in front of her and glanced over his shoulder. “Climb on.”
She saw the playful challenge in his brown eyes. That look—it felt new and exciting, so different from the concern that had hovered close to the surface during their video chats or when he’d first arrived home. Her fears, the ones she’d brought home from The Last Stop along with her doggie bag, faded into a whisper.
She hiked her dress up to her thighs. “Are you sure about this? I just ate about ten pounds’ worth of diner food.”
Including chocolate frosting... Her body hummed with the memory.
His brown eyes focused on the edge of her dress, just barely covering her underwear. “Oh, yeah.”
She wrapped her arms around his neck as he bent his knees. As she folded one leg around his waist, she felt his arms slide around to her backside, lifting her the rest of the way.
“Ready?” he asked, his voice low and husky as he hooked an arm under each of her legs.
“Yes.” But with her dress riding higher and higher, leaving her pressed against the hard wall of his back in only her panties, she was beginning to change her mind about being too tired or too full for finishing what they’d started earlier. One more night, no promises, aside from the assurance he’d never let her fall...
His powerful body easily carried her down the slope and under the tent to the kennel’s front door. Mark stopped and released his hold, allowing her to slide to the ground. Her dress moved higher until it decorated her waist.
“Amy.” The way he studied her, his broad chest expanding as he sucked in a breath, she wondered if what he really meant was mine.
“The dogs,” she said, slowly drawing the hem of her dress down to meet her knees.
Mark exhaled, reaching for the door. “I know.”
Leading him inside, Amy tried not to think about the way Mark’s touch, his voice, his presence behind her, heated her body, begging her to revisit the veterinary room, strip off her clothes, place her hands flat on the metal table and finish what they’d started. She wanted to step back to that place where she could close her eyes and pretend he was a trustworthy stranger intent on pleasuring her.
But that was just a fantasy. And she was beginning to realize the Mark behind the illusion was so much more.
“I’ll check on Bullet and Nova if you look in on the puppies,” she said. Mark nodded, heading farther down the corridor. Amy went into Nova’s and Bullet’s rooms, greeting both dogs with a treat and checking to make sure they had water and their doggy doors to their attached outdoor spaces were open. Moving through the tasks, her mind drifted to Mark—in the exam room, at the diner, licking her clean, his hands on her legs as he carried her, the way he’d stood by her all day...
She finished with the dogs and headed for the exit. Her body was on fire with need and wanting. Closing the kennel door behind her, she spotted him leaning against a tent pole, and she knew that she couldn’t walk away. Not from him. Not tonight. She wanted to let him in—to her bed, her life and maybe more.
She held out her hand. “Dance with me?”
“There’s no music.”
“We’ll pretend,” she said. “Please.”
“I don’t dance, Amy.”
“We both know that’s not true,” she teased. She moved closer, invading his space, pressing up against him. “Please, Mark.”
His hands moved to her hips, and he began to sway with her, slow-dancing to an imaginary song. There were things she wanted to tell him, and it was easier like this with her cheek pressed against his chest, unable to see his expression. The lights illuminating the kennel and the strings of Christmas lights lining the tent’s interior had all been removed.
“You deserve a home, Mark,” she said quietly. And I want it to be here. I want to know you’ll come back.
He stiffened but kept dancing. “I’m deployed six months out of the year. When I’m not overseas, I’m training. What I do, it’s a single man’s game. I thought we were clear on the rules.”
“We are,” she said. “But that doesn’t change the fact that you’re worthy of a real home. People waiting for you to come back—”
“No.” Mark froze, drawing back and looking down at her. “I’ve seen how easily life can slip away and how damn hard the grief is on people left behind. I refuse to do that to someone I care about. I’m not like Darren and his family. I’m not the golden kid everyone will miss.”
Amy stepped back, struck by the forcefulness in his tone. “Appearances can be deceiving.”
“Darren was my best friend for years, Amy. I knew him. He was a good man. He—�
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“He cheated on me.”
Amy looked down at the grass, feeling her heels sinking into the dirt. Part of her wanted the ground to swallow her up for saying those words out loud. But now that she’d spoken up, revealing the truth about her marriage, about the man she’d loved in what was beginning to feel like another life, she couldn’t hold back. Not anymore.
“He was away so much,” she continued. “Deployed for so long, stationed in California, and I lived here...”
Amy had played through all of the excuses, all the reasons Darren had given her for breaking their marriage vows. But Mark didn’t need to hear them. Judging from the wide-eyed fury on his face, the way his fists clenched at his sides, this was one secret she should have kept under lock and key.
16
MARK HAD SPENT MONTHS wishing his best friend was alive and breathing. He’d wanted to slap him on the back and thank Darren for welcoming him into his family, for the long afternoons spent hiking, for having Mark’s back for so many years when it had felt as if there was no one else he could count on.
But right now, he wanted Darren alive and breathing so he could kick his ass for hurting Amy.
Mark worked alongside men who deployed for months on end, some away from their wives far longer than they’d planned. But they remained steadfast and loyal to their loved ones.
“Whatever excuse Darren gave you...” Mark said, struggling to keep his tone even. He didn’t want to release his temper, not at Amy. The only person who deserved to feel the full force of his fury was dead and buried. “He was wrong. Distance is not a reason to hurt someone you love.”
“I know,” Amy said. “And I forgave him a long time ago. I’ll never know if our marriage would have survived if he’d come back from that last mission alive. I know I wanted him here fighting with me, for us.”
His heart broke for her. She’d told him that day after the funeral that not all of her memories were good, but he never imagined this. He wanted to reach for her, draw her close and hold her tight, but he didn’t trust himself. Not yet.
“When did you find out?” he demanded, trying like hell to erase the razor-sharp edge in his voice. But, shit, it took everything he had not to spin around and take a swing at the wall behind him.
“When he came home before the last mission. Darren wanted to put it behind us, and he promised it would never happen again. I like to believe he was right about that. People make mistakes. Even SEALs.”
“But you still hate hearing everyone talk about him like he was perfect.”
“He wasn’t,” she said softly. “But I can’t tell them that. His mother and his brothers don’t need to know. They’re already hurting so much. I won’t add to their pain.”
“I’m glad you told me.” He buried his burning fury as he drew her close.
“I wasn’t planning to.” She went willingly into his arms, but kept her palms flat against his chest as she looked up at him. “But I couldn’t stand seeing how you keep everyone at arm’s length, refusing to commit to anyone or anyplace because you think you don’t deserve it. You’re not the little boy sitting at the diner counter waiting for someone better than you to take the last piece of chocolate cake.”
Mark closed his eyes. He wanted to tell her she was wrong. But for the first time, doubt rose up. The idea of having someone waiting for him, of coming home to a woman... But he didn’t want just any woman. For him, it was Amy. He didn’t know how it had happened so fast, but over the past few days his feelings for her had changed.
Their friendship was still there, like a concrete foundation. But desire had sprung up like the four square walls she believed should be a part of his life. And he wanted to keep building, seeing where the future would lead them.
Opening his eyes, looking down at her, he knew it was a pipe dream. She had her rules, and he refused to break them. One man had already hurt her, giving her every reason to hate the job Mark loved. He wouldn’t be the second to break her heart.
“I might not be that kid anymore,” he said. “But setting up a home, getting a dog, even one that lives with someone else eight to ten months of the year, doesn’t change the fact that I’m leaving. First, training on base and then, I’ll deploy again.”
“I know,” she said, looking down at her hands. “I didn’t tell you this in order to change things between us.”
Mark touched her chin, tipping her face up. “Look at me, Amy. I’m going to make you one promise.”
“Mark—”
“Listen. Please,” he said. “Our friendship is solid. Nothing changes that. You can tell me anything, okay?”
She nodded.
Mark wrapped his arms around her, sliding one hand up into her hair, drawing her head to rest against his chest. He began to move, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. Amy relaxed, allowing him to lead. Engulfed in silence, without even a dog’s bark to interrupt, they danced.
After what she’d shared with him, he’d only planned to offer comfort. This day had been a whirlwind for her. But the way her thighs brushed back and forth against his, the feel of her hips following his rhythm, left him imagining ways to relieve the pressure of this wild day. And those thoughts left him hard and aching for her.
“Mark?” Her voice was a gentle whisper against his chest.
No way she’d missed the rock-solid evidence that his body wanted to give her a different kind of comfort. “Yeah?”
“I’m not full or tired anymore.” She moved seductively against him, leaving no room for doubt about where she wanted to take their dance.
He stepped back, reaching for her wrist. “Amy, are you sure? Tonight there are no blindfolds and no games. Just you and me.”
“Yes,” she said, her blue eyes staring into his, hot and intent.
Relief hit him hard and fast as his desire surged. He wanted her, but not here under the tent. Without a word, Mark scooped her up, one arm cradling her back and the other supporting her legs. Amy’s arms closed around his neck as he started for the house.
He practically double-timed it up the grass slope. Letting her down to open the front door, he took her hand, pulling her through the house to the spare bedroom. Closing the door behind them, leaving Jango and the other pieces of their past outside, he turned to her, searching her face for reservations.
Tonight was not about fulfilling fantasies and helping her move on with her life. He hadn’t brought her here to escape. If she wanted to keep her feet firmly planted in blindfolded games, he’d return her to the dog waiting patiently for her in the hall and take a long, cold shower.
Her lips parted, begging to be kissed. Her blue eyes burned bright—everything about her expression screaming, Take me now, I dare you.
“Mark?” The low, throaty sound of her voice went straight to his cock.
He wanted her. He craved a taste of the future that would never be his. It might be torture to walk away afterward, but he would. But first, he needed one more night in her arms.
He closed the distance between them, pushing her blazer off her shoulders before turning her gently so that her back was to him. He reached for her zipper, and slowly drew it down her back. Moving his hands over her soft, smooth skin, he guided the fabric down her body until the dress fell away.
He released the hooks securing her bra and reached around her, running his palms over her nipples before cupping her breasts in his hands. Then he turned her to face him.
“Mark, please.”
The sound of his name on her lips, the frank acknowledgment that she wanted this, that she wanted him, cut through his restraint. He reached for her, kissing her hard. His hands moved to her silky thong underwear, and he pulled them down quickly, eager to see all of her. But he wasn’t the only one frantic to remove the barriers between them. Amy stripped away his clothes, kissing him back as if she wished to lead their primal dance.
She pressed her naked body against his, arching her back until the tight peaks of her nipples brushed his chest. He
was heartbeats away from taking her right there in the middle of the room. Amy rose up on her tiptoes, her arms banding tight around his neck. Her right leg hooked around his waist as her hips rocked into him. His mind switched into countdown mode—five, four, three, two—
“Ah, hell,” he said roughly. “I need a condom.”
“Now,” she demanded, releasing him.
Mark scrambled to his rucksack and located the foil packet. He moved quickly as if he’d left a live bomb ready to detonate in the middle of the room. Tearing it open, he covered himself and turned back to Amy. Their eyes locked briefly before her gaze swept over him, the rise and fall of her chest ticked up a notch.
“I like being able to see you,” she said.
Her words drove home the fact that she wanted him, not a faceless escape. And he couldn’t hold back. Mark closed the space between them and lifted her up, guiding her legs until they wrapped around his hips. With one palm on each cheek, he raised her higher. Then he lowered her down, entering her slowly.
Amy’s hands gripped his upper arms, her gaze moving over his muscles. Her tongue touched her lower lip, and he felt the inner walls of her hot, wet core tighten around him. The way she looked at him, as if every inch of his body turned her on, left him struggling to hold back.
He should carry her to the bed. But it was too far. He wouldn’t last, not with her thighs squeezing his hips as she raised and lowered herself.
“Amy,” he growled.
She looked up, her eyes wild and fierce. This was a woman who knew what she wanted, who claimed it. Knowing that right now she wanted him, that she had chosen him—something inside him snapped.
Mark captured her mouth, kissing her hard and deep as he carried her to the door. Supporting her against the wooden surface, he drew back, needing to see her as he drove into her over and over.
“Look at me,” he said.
Her nails dug into his arms, tempering the overwhelming pleasure rocketing through his body with the slightest hint of pain. Her legs held tight, but she no longer fought to control the motions, letting him take over as he pushed her closer to the brink.
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