"I see. So, what information are you going to be teaching me?" He winked his droopy eyelid at me.
I swallowed hard to keep myself from materializing the vomit that danced in my throat. “Well, what is it that you would like to learn?”
"Oh, sweetheart, I thought you'd never ask." His laugh reached the parts of myself I hadn't seen in years. Rage filled my core. His words reminded me of the way Chad first talked to me. It was then I knew why I was there and what I had to teach him.
The plan was set into motion without much time to think. An episode of Snapped came to mind, and I knew what I had to do. I pushed up a seductive laugh and played along with him. “Oh, Mr. Brice, I know just what I want to show you.” I unbuttoned the top button on my shirt and licked my lips. “But we need to take care of business before we play.”
The sparkle in his eyes glistened in the light of the lamp. “I’ll be a good student, as long as I can spank the teacher.”
“I do like a good spanking.” I winked at him as I took my hair down out of the messy bun and shook it free. “So, Mr. Brice, does your diabetes require you to take insulin?”
“Yes. I’ve been doing that for a few years now.”
“Where do you keep it? I’ll need to have a look at it.”
He pointed to the kitchen. “It’s in the fridge.”
I walked into the kitchen; I was still in his line of sight as I opened the door to the refrigerator. I noticed a bag of syringes and two bottles of Lantus. “Did you just fill your prescription?”
“No, I get a three-month supply in the mail. I think I have a couple months left.”
I shut the refrigerator door as my mind raced with thoughts. “Could I use your restroom?”
“Oh…do you want to get more comfortable before the exam?”
His words brought me back to my purpose for being there. There was no way I would be able to return, I had to do everything in one visit. I forced a smile as I bit my top lip. “Yes. I want to get to the good stuff.”
“Down the hall, on the right.”
I flipped on the light and shut the door behind me. In the mirror, I didn't recognize the person looking back at me. "Val, what are you doing?" The words left my lips without feeling connected. My heart flipped in my chest as I opened the medicine cabinet. A bottle of Tylenol PM sat on the top shelf. I removed the bottle and took three pills out and put them in the pocket of my cardigan. What am I doing? The question kept coming, but I didn’t really know.
I flushed the toilet, washed my hands, and returned to the couch. "Do you have any family, Mr. Brice?" I picked up the file and pulled out the notebook, looking down to take my focus off of him.
“Not exactly. I have friends.”
“Oh? Those aren’t your grandkids?” I pointed to the photos on the wall.
“Them? No. Those are…friends.”
I took a closer look at the photos on the wall. They were all young girls, they looked to be around twelve years old. Trophies. These were his keepsakes to remember the girls he damaged. The thought of their pain fueled my fury. "How often do you have visitors?"
“Not very often. I could be dead and no one would find me for days.”
It was like he read my mind. “So, no one checks up on you? Not even a phone call?”
“If you’re asking if anyone will walk in on us, the answer is no. I’m just a lonely old man. A very, lonely old man.”
I pulled the blue pills out of my pocket and handed them to him. “Take these for me? I like my men hard and stiff.”
His excitement didn’t leave room for questions. He popped the pills in his mouth and washed them down with the can of diet Coke sitting on the coffee table in front of him. “Oh, sweetheart, I’ll deliver all of your desires. These pills will only intensify my manhood.”
“Do you have anything to drink? I need a little something to loosen up.”
"There's some beer in the fridge or some scotch on the table."
“Want a glass of scotch with me?”
“I’ll never pass up a drink with a beautiful woman.”
I got the bottle of scotch and brought it into the kitchen, where I poured a little in one glass, and more in the other. I handed him the glass with more, while I took a small sip from my glass. “Drink up.” I smiled as I held my glass up. He took a large sip, and as I held the glass to my lips, he matched my drink with another. His glass was empty before I sat down. The excitement from this old pervert was almost too predictable. I unbuttoned my shirt another button and placed my hand on my breast as my eyes met his. “Do you want to feel?”
I walked over to him and got on my knees between his legs. He eagerly placed his hand on my breast, and I put my hand on the top of his pants. I felt the blood rushing to his penis, and I felt more in control than I had ever before. “Let’s go to the bedroom and get more comfortable.” I held his hand against my breast as our eyes met.
“I’m going to give you a ride you’ll never forget.” He stood up and took my hand and led me to the bedroom. He took off his pants and white underwear and laid on the bed, his erect penis in his hand, stroking it as he watched me take off my cardigan and top. I crawled on top of him, my pants still on, and rubbed myself against his penis. He reached up and grabbed my breasts, fumbling, trying to expose them. I backed up, out of his reach.
“Stroke it for me. I want to see how you like it.”
“No, put your mouth on it.” His words brought me back to Sonya’s story. I imagined her little body quivering under his.
"I've got a better idea." I opened his closet and found some neckties hanging on a hanger. I pulled one out and wrapped it around his wrists. "I like it kinky. Wanna get dirty with me, old man?" I took the end of the tie and wrapped it around the spindle on the headboard, pulling tight to make sure he could not get loose.
“Oh, I’ve always wanted to try this.”
Once his hands were tied above his head, I got back on top of him and rode him with my pants still on, getting him to the brink of ejaculation, and stopped. I got up and put my shirt back on, and then my cardigan.
"Hey, where are you going?" He wiggled his hands to try to get free. "Get your tits back here and finish what you started."
"Oh, I fully intend to." I walked out of the bedroom and back into the kitchen, opened the refrigerator, and removed the bottle of insulin and two syringes. I took the orange cap off the first needle and put it into the Lantus and drew out 100 units. I repeated the steps with the second syringe and put the covers back on. I returned the bottle of insulin and returned to the bedroom.
Still fighting to get untied, his penis was no longer erect, laying limp against his leg. "Ah, look at your little limp dick. Not such a stud now, are you?" I walked closer to him and took his penis in my hand, and squeezed it until he screamed.
“What are you doing, you crazy bitch?” The fear in his voice satisfied my desire to continue. I pulled the first syringe out of my pocket and removed the cap. As I held it up, I flicked the side to remove the air bubbles. I lifted up his shirt and stuck the needle into his stomach. I carefully replaced the cover and removed the second syringe from my pocket.
“Where should I put this one?” I held the needle up for him to see. “How about in your penis? Or your balls?” I flicked the side of the syringe and brought it down near his legs. He kicked his legs at me.
“Get the fuck away from me, you psycho bitch.”
“I haven’t heard that one before.” I climbed on top of him to keep his legs still, the syringe in my hand. I shoved the needle into another spot on his stomach and pushed the insulin into him. “That should do it.” I looked down at him and saw the terror in his eyes.
“What the fuck are you doing? Why are you doing this?”
“Do you remember Sonya?”
His eyes went wide. “Sonya?”
"No, you sick fuck. I'm not the little girl you raped. I'm her friend." A laugh I didn't recognize climbed up my throat. "What's that saying? Karma's a what? Oh,
that's right, a bitch." I got off of him, put the caps back on the needles, put them into my pocket, and went to clean up the kitchen. I put the glasses of scotch in the sink and ran the water over them. Under the sink, I found a pair of rubber gloves and put them on my hands. I found a jar of Clorox wipes and pulled one out. I ran the wipe over the handle of the refrigerator and then went to the bathroom to try to erase my fingerprints.
The vision of a crime scene flashed in my mind. I looked around and saw all of the potential evidence I might leave behind. There was no time to get rid of everything, and I couldn't remember everything I touched. I knew the bottles of insulin and Tylenol PM were the most essential things to wipe clean. I wet a paper towel and washed both bottles, drying them, and returned them to where I found them. I remembered the bottle of scotch. I wiped down the bottle with the same damp paper towel and tossed it in the trash in the kitchen. I finished washing the glasses in the sink and dried them with a dish towel, returning them to the cupboard where I found them.
I picked my folder and pen off the couch and went back to the bedroom. I removed the glove to check Donald Brice's pulse. He was still alive, but not responsive. From the episode of Snapped I’d watched about murder by insulin, I knew it could take a while to kill him. I was confident he would die before he was found. I untied his hands and placed them in a more natural position. His wrists didn’t show signs of being disturbed, no cuts or marks. I lifted his shirt to check the injection sites, they blended in with the others. I put a blanket over him, to make it look like he was sleeping, and turned off the light.
I looked around the house one last time and didn't see anything out of the ordinary. When I closed the door behind me, I removed the gloves and looked around to see if my car had been visible to neighbors. The giant oak tree appeared to shield the house from the road, and no other homes could be seen from where my car was parked. "Good work, Stephanie Mills." I looked down at the clock on my dash to see I had fifteen minutes before I was supposed to meet Tim. There was no time to take a shower or get the filth from Mr. Brice off me.
I pulled into a gas station to fill up and remembered I needed to get rid of the syringes in my pocket. I reached down on the floor of my car and picked up a bag from McDonald's and carefully placed the syringes and rubber gloves in the bag. I crumpled it up before placing it in the trash can by the gas pumps. After filling up my car, I continued on my way home.
When I pulled into my driveway, Tim was already there. He was still in his car on his cell phone. The smile on his face when he saw me was enough to wipe away the doubt that started to creep into my mind. I walked over to him and wrapped my arms around him, kissing him longer than I expected. “I’m so glad to see you. It’s been a long day.”
“Well, I’m happy to see you, too. I’m even happier at how happy you are.” A nervous laugh filled the cold night’s air. “That’s a lot of happy.”
“It’s going to get happier.” I reached up to kiss him again.
“Oh, really?” He opened the back door and got a bag off the backseat.
“If all goes well.” The adrenaline that had been pumping through my veins left me feeling surprisingly calm.
Gabriel was at the door again, yowling when he heard my key enter the lock. “We’re home, buddy.” I turned to see a smile on Tim’s face.
“Yeah, buddy, we’re home. And Daddy brought you a surprise.”
“Daddy?” I laughed at his attempt at humor. “Hmm, that kinda sounds good.”
“Sorry, too much?” He set the bag on the table and pulled out a can of Fancy Feast. “I got my favorite boy the good stuff.”
“He does love that stuff.” I got a saucer out of the cupboard and emptied the can out. “I need a shower before dinner. Want to join me?”
"Sure." As he set the sandwiches on the table, what I said registered. "Wait…did you just ask me to join you?"
I nodded my head as I kicked off my shoes and took off my cardigan. It dropped on the floor by his feet. “So, do you?”
“Um…yeah…what’s gotten into you?”
“I hope…you.”
“Holy shit.” He followed me into the bathroom, removing his clothes as he walked. I slid off my pants and panties and unbuttoned my shirt and let it drop to the floor. When I unhooked my bra, Tim helped take it off. I finished pulling his pants and boxers off and stood up to kiss him. He pulled my body into his and kissed me, his penis pushing into me.
“Are you sure you’re ready for this, Val?” He whispered between kisses.
"Yes. I want to make love to you." We stepped into the shower, and I turned the hot water on. As it cascaded over us, we kissed as he guided his penis inside of me, and carefully thrust inside me as he held me against the wall. "Oh my god. Oh, Tim, it feels so fucking good, don't stop." He increased the rate and pulled out.
“Fuck, Val, I don’t think I have a condom.”
"It's okay, just don't stop." My hands grabbed his butt to pull him closer. "Mmm, don't stop." The water hit my face as he thrust deeper inside of me, staying there as he kissed me.
"Val, I don't think I can last much longer." He pulled out and thrust back in, pulling out one last time. He pulled me into him as he kissed me and moved the wet hair out of my face. "Wow. I wasn't expecting that."
“Yeah, me either.” I kissed him with the hot water beating down on his strong back. “That was amazing. Can we do that again?”
“Absolutely. I’ll come prepared next time.”
“Oh, I was talking about later.” My nipples hardened when the cold air hit them. Shivering, I stood under the water to wash my hair.
“You’re so beautiful, Val.” He ran his hands over the outline of my body.
I poured the Ivory body wash into my hand and lathered it up to rub over his muscular body. He took the bottle and did the same to me. We took turns under the water until we both finished our shower. When I turned the water off, I gave him a towel and put my hair into one and took another one to dry my body off.
“That was the best stress reliever I’ve ever tried. I can’t believe I waited so long to try it.”
“At your service.” He winked as he opened up his backpack to pull out his sweatpants.
“I’m starving. What did you make us tonight?”
He laughed as he pulled his shirt over his head. “I forgot about dinner. Your beautiful, naked body could make me forget about anything.” He walked over to the counter and held up the sandwiches. “This seems like a pathetic dinner after the gift you just gave me.”
“Oh, stop.” I kissed him as I took a turkey sandwich out of his hand. He pulled out a bag of sour cream and onion chips and a bag of pretzels and held them up for me to pick. “Bring them both.” I went to the refrigerator and took out two Sam Adams and brought them into the living room. We sat together on the couch as we savored our dinner in silence.
Chapter Twenty-One
I rolled over and hugged Tim’s naked body as he slept. We hadn’t talked much last night, just enjoyed each other’s company. There was so much I wanted to tell him and equally as much that I couldn’t. I never felt the need to share my life with anyone before, and now the thought of having to keep secrets tainted me with guilt. There was no way I could tell him what I did. I couldn’t tell anyone.
Panic settled into my chest as I replayed the day before. I wasn’t even sure who that was, surely it wasn't me. But it was. How could hurting someone else feel so good in the moment, and now plague me with fear? I sat up and put on an oversized t-shirt and made my way to the bathroom. I closed and locked the door behind me, I didn't want to risk Tim walking in on me. I turned the shower on and sat in the corner by the door and cried.
Unable to catch my breath, my sobs turned to hyperventilating. Images of Donald's dead body, rotting in his bed, appeared every time I closed my eyes. What if no one ever found him? What if Sonya's mom was the one who did? What if they did find him and knew it was me? What if he wasn’t dead? What if I lost my job? Or they sent me
to jail? What about Gabriel? Who would take care of him? What if my Gabriel comes looking for me, and he found out his mom was in jail?
The endless thoughts swirled around my head. Each possible scenario played and replayed. There was no way Tim would love me if he found out. No way anyone could. I stood up and made my way to the toilet in time to raise the lid and throw up the contents of my stomach.
Breathe Val. I took a deep breath to try and gain control over the emotions that were drowning me. He was a monster. You did what you had to. Think about the children you saved. You did the right thing. As the thoughts changed, the power returned. This was for Sonya, and for all the other young girls he violated. Monster didn’t even begin to describe him. I took one last deep breath and turned off the shower. I picked up the mouthwash and swished the taste of vomit out of my mouth. The actions from the day before were released, and the feeling of guilt left with them. Some secrets were necessary.
When I returned to the bedroom, Tim was still asleep. I took the t-shirt off and snuggled up next to him and placed my head on his chest. Feeling his breathing under me brought the calmness I needed to focus on. I wouldn't let any more time pass without living the life I deserved. If I learned anything yesterday, it was that I had the power to take a situation I didn't like and change it to be what I wanted. From ending the life of a predator to finding the life I was missing. No more time spent being cautious. No more time spent being a victim.
Tim's breathing must have lulled me back to sleep because the familiarity of the stark white hospital wall and the sound of a crying baby came back to me. This time, I found him. I found my beautiful little boy and hugged him in my arms. The love I felt between us righted every wrong I ever experienced in my life. I held him close to my heart and rocked him in my arms. The color returned to the walls, and we were no longer alone. When I woke up, I didn't feel empty like the dream always left me before. That was the sign I needed. I knew now, without a doubt my actions yesterday, all of them, were the right ones.
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