I shake my head and lean back. “Nothing. Just that a few months ago, I was convinced that was impossible for me. And honestly it probably was.”
“And now?”
I meet his thoughtful expression. “I want it, man. I really do. Parker believed we could get there, and I want that for myself as much as for him now.”
“Of course, you can. You just gotta play the long game. Take the small steps, and before you know it, you’ll look back at the mountain you’ve climbed.”
“You always make things sound easy.”
“And you know they’re not.” He settles into a serious expression. “How’s your head?”
I study my fingers as they tap an absent rhythm beside my plate.
“I don’t know, man. I don’t know much of anything right now except that I have to keep trying. I want to because I have a life out there waiting for me when I get through this.”
I take a deep breath. “I’m thinking of checking into a program for a few weeks. You know, to deal with the psychological crap and get a foundation. Set myself up for real, you know?”
I dare a look up and breathe a sigh of relief.
“I think that’s a great idea. I’ll give you the info on where I did my recovery. It was an incredible place. Life-changing.”
“Thanks, that’d be great.” I pick at the straw again. “Mila has big plans for us. I need to fix my shit.”
“You need to learn to manage it. Nothing ever gets fixed.”
For some reason, I find comfort in that. Attainable goals, that’s what I need. Someone like Luke who’s lived through it, who fights and survives and is willing to drag my needy ass along with him. No wonder the world is in love with this guy.
“Keep me in the loop,” he says. “I wouldn’t be surprised if Mila has big plans for all of us.”
∞∞∞
Luke was right. With Mila at the helm of our public narrative, everyone wants us. Labels, promoters, every fangirl and her brother. Once the word is out that Limelight isn’t dead, but intent on shining bright for Parker, the requests go viral. Everyone wants in on our story, and Mila convenes almost hourly band meetings to discuss the latest options on the table.
“First thing’s first,” she says, once it’s obvious we need more than updates; we need decisions. “What are you doing about a lead guitar player?”
My stomach twists as all eyes rest on me.
Of course, we have to…
“We can never replace your brother, Jess,” Mila says gently. “But we can add a new member.”
I swallow. “Yeah. What about Jay?”
Reece’s eyes light up. “Oh my god. Of course! We used to play together all the time before he got into the tech side.”
“He knows all our music. Probably better than we do,” I add.
Derrick nods with excitement. “Plus he wears suspenders.”
Also true.
Satisfied, Mila types something out on her laptop. Click, click, tap, tap. Enter. Back to us. “Okay. I’ll have a word with Jay this afternoon and make an offer. Next discussion: label. At this point, you pretty much have your pick, so you tell me what you want.”
We exchange long looks, and I warm at the silent agreement extending around the table. It’s been a while since I’ve been so sure about anything. “I say, none. I say we do this our own way.”
Mila’s gaze jerks from the screen to mine. “What?”
“No one will do a better job with our future than you. We trust you.”
“Really? Are you sure?”
“Positive.”
“Thank you, that means so much, but I can still look after you as your manager while—”
“Labels let us down. You haven’t.”
Her smile is something I won’t forget. I tuck it away for later when we’re alone.
“Well, okay then. Now we need a studio so we can get you fellas back in the game.”
I grin and lean forward. “Not a problem. I’ve got that covered too.”
∞∞∞
Dad’s house is nicer than I expected. It’s no castle, by any means, but with four bedrooms, three baths, and a finished basement, it’s obvious he bought it as more than a bachelor pad for a recovering addict.
He shows us around with pride, explaining his plans for each room, including a lounge for visiting artists and guest rooms for overnight stays when sessions run late.
The kitchen is fully stocked, and it seems like he’d be offended if we didn’t help ourselves to the snacks and beverages he’s provided. Derrick has no problem diving in. Reece and I grab a bottle of water for the trip downstairs to the studio.
Even with the warning, I’m not prepared for it. The scene at the bottom of the steps is straight out of any small, modern studio I’ve visited. The space is bright and clean, with glass and hardwood everywhere. Recessed lighting makes it shine, and when he leads us through the glass door, I instantly fall in love with the acoustics. From Jay’s expression, he’s rabid to play on this side of the window again. A control room looks on from the other side, and even from this distance I suspect it’s a producer’s wet dream.
“Wow,” I mutter.
Mila smiles. Reece and Jay visually inspect every crevice in awe, and Derrick does his dolphin-seal dance. Yep, this is the place for our new beginning.
“Your studio time is free, of course. I’ll deduct extras from what I owe you by submitting a weekly invoice for your review,” Dad says.
Mila extends her hand. “Thank you. We agree to those terms.”
Dad takes it, his expression brighter than I’ve ever seen it. “Excellent. Come, I’ll show you the control room.”
Sure enough, the engineer and producer’s lair make the studio look mediocre. Two giant screens hang on a wall and display massive grids of tracks piled on top of each other in the recording software. It’s so impressive, I can’t wait to play with the production side of things.
“Wow, this is sick,” Jay mumbles. His eyes are huge as he takes in the room like a starving cheetah at a steak buffet.
Dad crosses his arms, beaming. “Thanks. I’m hoping we can work together on the mix and production.”
Jay looks ready to wet his pants. “Seriously?”
“Absolutely.” He clears his throat. “Well, this is it. You want to give it a shot?”
“For sure,” I say, warm, driven, excited for the first time in a long time.
“Great. What are we starting with?”
Our eyes lock. Producer and artists. Hope and second chances.
Father and son.
“‘Philadelphia.’”
∞∞∞
“Oh my god!” Mila rarely loses her cool, so when she bursts into the control room and interrupts our playback, we know it’s big.
“What’s going on?” I ask.
Her eyes shine with excitement. This is what dreams look like when they come true on someone’s face.
“I just got off the phone with TJ Barringer!”
“Night Shifts Black’s manager?” I ask, my heartrate climbing to unsustainable levels.
She nods. “They’ve officially invited you to co-headline on their world tour this autumn!”
Our heads shake in unison. “No way,” Reece says. “No. That can’t be right.”
“You sure they didn’t mean we could open for them like last year?” I say.
Her eyes narrow in mock irritation. “I know how to speak English, boys. I’m telling you, Luke and Casey want you at the top with them. This is… in all my experience…” She shakes her head and demonstrates what we’re all feeling.
This is the type of shit you don’t even dare to fantasize about.
“Well, what did you say?” Derrick gasps out.
“I said we’d think about it,” she quips in a dry tone. “What do you think I said?”
We all connect in one giant grin.
“Abso-freakin-lutely!”
I draw in a long breath, stare at the gap between my father and
me. He’s there. I feel him warming the cavities of my heart. Grinning an I-told-you-so so obnoxious, I’d punch him if I could.
We’re doing it, Parker. We’re about to kick the world’s ass.
EPILOGUE
I keep my word to myself and my newly-formed family. I check in at Reflections and work my ass off to make the most of my time there. I have too much waiting for me outside to fuck this up.
My program and progress allow for visitors, and Mila and Dad stop by often. The weeks fly with productive sessions of individual and group counseling, physical and emotional training, and a general focus on holistic wellbeing. Slowly, my mental dependence on escape begins to transform into a healthier reliance on community and music.
I understand the truth right from the start. How what seems so logical now never would have worked before I was ready. I had to want this for myself. Like Chris warned, I had to be ready to work hard to make a lasting change I could trust. The thing is, it will never end. No, this fight is a marathon. Mila promises she’s all in for the long haul, and that’s becoming more significant the more I grasp the challenge I’m facing. Strange part though? I’m starting to believe them when they say I can do this. The demons still circle, but they’ve lost a lot of their power.
It seems like just yesterday I lost my brother and started on this path toward the future he always wanted for me.
I’d do anything to have him here, to see the fruits of his sacrifice that are helping me become the man he believed in. But the harder I fight, the more I understand how the best way to honor him is to keep him alive in my story. To include him in my success, my failure.
I’m here, man. Clean, hopeful, and surrounded by a bigger family than we’ve ever known. The flicker of a candle has become a blaring sun I can see even in the dark moments.
Mila meets me in front of the facility on my last day. We grip each other in a hug strong enough to finish one chapter and start the next.
“I’m so proud of you, Jess.” Tears collect in her eyes as she leans against me in the cab. “I can’t wait for the world to meet the real you.”
My heart swells.
I’m armed, dangerous, and ready to kick some ass.
“It’s all right in the candlelight,” I sing softly to her.
Arctic eyes shine with affection as she wraps her arm around mine. Her lips turn up for a kiss, and I’m already there. “You’re my candlelight, Mila Taylor,” I breathe against them.
“Yeah? Well you’re my Burger Prince Charming.”
∞∞∞
“Post.” Mila drops a fancy envelope in front of me.
I set my mug on the table and scan the unusual letter. There’s no return information, just old-timey calligraphy with my name and address.
“What is it?” she asks, and I shrug.
Sliding my finger, I break the seal and pull out some frilly, yet classy-looking, card.
As a dear friend,
Callie Roland and Casey Barrett request that you save the date of September 4, 2018 to join them as a witness and celebrant of their marriage. A formal invitation and details to follow.
Well, damn.
A giant grin spreads over my face.
“What is it?” Mila hovers over my shoulder, straining for a peek.
I glance up and push the card toward her. “Be my plus one for the wedding of the century?”
The End.
For now.
NOTE FROM THE AUTHOR
Addiction is a serious illness that impacts both the victim and their loved ones. Seeking help takes strength and courage, and there are many compassionate people and organizations devoted to helping those who struggle.
If you, or anyone you know, is struggling with addiction, help is available. Please know you are not alone and seeking professional assistance is critical to recovery.
American Addictions Centers https://americanaddictioncenters.org is a great resource to find facilities and information for victims and their families.
Seek help, and know that you are important and you are loved.
Sincerely,
Alyson Santos
ORIGINAL LIMELIGHT MUSIC
Experience Limelight’s unique alternative rock/EDM sound.
Original Song “Limelight” – With Trailer
Original Song “Limelight” – Entire Song
MORE NSB
Thank you for taking this journey with me!
LIMELIGHT continues the journey of several characters in the NSB universe.
For Luke’s story:
For Wes’s story:
A special thank you to bestselling author Sunniva Dee for loaning her Deepsilver characters.
For more on Leon, Arriane, Inga, Cam, and Christian:
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
From the start of my journey, I’ve been blown away by the amount of support from new friends, readers, bloggers, and fellow authors. I can’t possibly see this as my accomplishment, but as an incredible blessing thanks, in large part, to all of you. There are so many people in my heart, and I wish I could list every one of you, even though I know it’s impossible. Please know that I treasure you all and take nothing for granted.
To my amazing husband who is always there to support me. Without you I would not be writing these words.
To Sunniva Dee: my amazing AB and CP. I’m so happy to share a brain with someone as amazing as you! Love being your Virgo.
To Nicola Tremere: Thank you for being my UK Consultant. Even more importantly, thank you for being such a good friend.
To Lynn Vroman, Hazel James, Darlene Avery, Nisha Reading, Evie Woods, and Kali McQuillen: Your friendship and feedback mean so much to me. You always help bring the best out of my writing.
To Jon Meckes: As always, thank you for lending your talent and music industry expertise.
To Seraquil/Nico: Thank you for using your incredible talent to bring Limelight’s unique music to life. I absolutely love “Limelight” and had a blast working with you.
To Era Media Co.: Thank you for yet another beautiful cover.
To Megan Buisch: Thank you for your support and lending your medical expertise.
To the “epic” members of ABC (Aly’s Breakfast Club): I can never thank you enough for your encouragement and support. You always bring a smile to my face and remind me why I do this. I love you hard!
To all my readers, I wish I could thank every one of you. Thank you for taking this journey with me and I would love to hear from you!
Alyson Santos
PO Box 577
Trexlertown, PA 18087-0577
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Table of Contents
Limelight Contents
Prologue
I: Feud
2: Freedom
3: Englewood
4: Buzz-Chasing
5: Not Worth the Pain
6: Regrets
7: Traitors
8: Confessions
9: Jonas
10: Daylight Mugging
11: Memories
12: Winter Fest
13: Jane
14: Candlelight
15: The Tunnel
16: Reunions
17: Gina
18: A Piece of Hell
19: Running
20: Agitator
21: HEA
22: Wedding Band
23: Viral
24: Decisions
25: Getting It Back
26: Smother
27: Voids
28: Philadelphia
29: Steps and Leaps
Epilogue
Note from the Author
Orig
inal Limelight Music
More NSB
Acknowledgements
Limelight Page 24