by Erica Lee
I shrugged my shoulders and threw up my hands but was only met with a stone-cold look in response. I slowly stood up and reluctantly patted Grace on the shoulder. “Now, now. There’s nothing wrong with you. This is just a minor blip on the way to your happily ever after. You’ll see.”
Leah tossed me a satisfied grin, and it took everything in me not to start laughing at my own words. Before I had a chance to retreat, Grace turned around and looked up at me with bloodshot eyes. “Do you really mean it?” She quickly stood and wrapped her arms tightly around me. Damn it, she smelled good. Did she use some sort of lavender body wash?
Almost as quickly as she had initiated the hug, Grace jumped back. “I’m so sorry,” she muttered, clearly embarrassed. “I don’t know what’s gotten into me. I’ve just been such a mess lately.”
So I’ve noticed. These were the words that immediately popped into my head. They were the words that I normally would have spoken out loud, but I knew I had to bite my tongue. That was what Kinsley would have said, not Laurel. “It’s fine,” I lied. “We’ve all been there.”
“Have… have you?” Grace asked shyly. I felt a knot form in the pit of my stomach in response to her question. I didn’t have to worry about coming up with an answer though, because Grace spoke again instead. “Actually, forget I asked that. It’s not any of my business. Again… I’m… I’m sorry. I’m not normally like this, I promise.”
“Don’t even worry about it. Some things are better left a mystery though.” I threw in a wink for good measure and noticed Leah giving me a subtle thumbs up, clearly impressed with my answer.
“Anyway,” Leah cut in, trying to change the subject. “Anything specific you want to do while you’re in the city?”
“I thought it would be really neat to see the Liberty Bell.” Grace’s voice gained some cheerfulness back with these words.
I, in turn, groaned internally. Of course she wanted to see the Liberty Bell. The stupid bell… with a stupid crack in it. I get that it had history and all, but that didn’t make it any more interesting. Really neat certainly weren’t the words I would use to describe it.
“Sounds like a great idea. We could do all of the historical stuff tomorrow, then maybe hit up some bars. Was there a certain time you wanted to head back on Sunday?” Leah asked, quickly adding, “You’re welcome to stay until Monday if you want. I’d say you could stay even longer since it’s your summer break, but Liam and I are going on vacation.”
“I actually wanted to talk to you about that,” Grace answered quietly. “I think I’m going to stick around here for a bit. Not here precisely, but in Philadelphia. I thought I could do a short term lease or an extended stay hotel while I figured out my plan.”
“That’s awesome!” Leah shouted enthusiastically. “I get to spend the summer with my two best friends.”
Seriously? Not awesome. I cleared my throat, causing both Leah and Grace to look in my direction. “Leah, could I talk to you please?” I asked, trying to keep my voice as level as possible.
She nodded, and we both made our way down the hallway and into my bedroom. “What the hell are you thinking?” I whisper-screamed, once I knew we were out of earshot. “There is nothing awesome about this situation.”
A look of confusion and annoyance settled onto Leah’s face. “It is awesome actually. Grace and I used to be inseparable. She’s struggling right now, but she really is a cool girl. If you’d just give her a chance, I truly think you guys could get along really well.”
I waved a hand at her. “I’m not sure I believe that, but that’s also not the big issue here. You told me I have to be Laurel around her. I’ve been putting on this charade for a few hours and I feel exhausted. There’s no way I can do this for weeks on end.” I took a deep breath before continuing, feeling my annoyance over the whole situation building. “And you know what? I shouldn’t have to pretend at all. Grace clearly isn’t pretending to be anything she isn’t. You said it yourself. You love Kinsley Scott. So I honestly find it pretty shitty that you’re telling me I can’t be myself.”
Leah sighed and looked toward the ground, kicking around a crumpled up piece of paper I had written notes on for my current book. “You’re right. It was wrong of me to ask that of you. I panicked, OK? It’s hard to bring people together who have known you at two very different points in your life. I was worried you guys would butt heads. But you’re absolutely right. I think you’re like the coolest and Grace deserves to see that side of you. You deserve to let people see that side of you.” She finally looked up and placed an accusatory finger on my chest. “But don’t let that go to your head. Your ego can’t afford to get any bigger.”
I laughed, then pulled Leah in close to me, sticking my tongue out to lick her cheek in the process. She pulled back and quickly wiped it off. “That’s gross. Why do you always do that? Save that for your special lady friends.”
I raised both eyebrows and grinned widely. “I save my tongue for more important duties when it comes to my lady friends.”
Leah pushed away from me and shook her head. “You’re disgusting.” She then started walking toward the door and turned around just before leaving. “Just take it easy on her, OK?”
“Of course. I promise.” I tapped my middle fingers together twice, which had somehow become our sacred sign of a promise at some point during our friendship. Leah gave me a satisfied grin, before completely retreating.
Before leaving the room, I switched out my glasses for contacts, then confidently marched down the hallway. I swaggered toward the couch where Grace was now sitting and stopped right in front of her, offering my hand. “If you’re going to be sticking around here, I need to reintroduce myself. I’m Kinsley Scott. Unlike Laurel Lake, I don’t believe in happy endings. I honestly think love is a crock of shit and you’re much better off alone anyway. Sex on the other hand… sex is where you should put your focus. I’m kind of a lady sex connoisseur myself, so if you need any advice on finding someone to bang, I’m in. But I can’t be expected to continue to spew this bullshit about happily ever after with you.”
Once I was done with my rant, Grace just stared up at me, eyes wide. “That’s… good to know.” She slowly nodded her head as she spoke. “I’m going to go to bed now.”
I watched her as she retreated back to Leah’s room, then turned back to look at Leah, who was now shaking her head at me. “What happened to taking it easy on her?”
I shrugged my shoulders. “That was me taking it easy on her.”
Chapter 4: Grace
“As you can see, this is a picture of the Liberty Bell. There it is in all of its cracked glory. This is exactly what you’re going to see in person, only you’ll be surrounded by a thousand other people, in a ridiculously hot room that smells like steaming piss and BO. But hey, if that’s what you want to do today, that’s cool. I’m just warning you. I wouldn’t want you to be disappointed.”
I looked over at the girl sitting next to me and almost laughed at the irony of her words. I wouldn’t want you to be disappointed. When I first came out, it was Laurel Lake’s books that helped me believe that I could find love. The past six months, her words were my constant motivation to get out of bed and believe in a brighter tomorrow. As if on cue, my phone chimed at that very moment, and I looked down to see a notification that Laurel Lake had tweeted. This time I did laugh out loud. “Good morning lovelies! Any big plans for today? I’m taking a visitor to see the historical #libertybell. Don’t forget: it’s a beautiful day to fall in love! Don’t give up.”
I looked between my phone and Kinsley (who was now laughing at some raunchy comedian on TV) a few more times. I laughed again, this time a snort escaping me, which caught Kinsley’s attention.
“Huh, Just Grace, I wouldn’t have thought you were the type of girl who found this funny. Maybe I judged you wrong.”
“Oh, I wasn’t laughing at that,” I answered, sounding much more shy than I wanted to.
Kinsley raised an eyebrow a
t me. “Oh yeah? What’s so funny then?”
Without saying a word, I held my phone up, which still had her tweet on the screen. Kinsley tilted her head and squinted at it. “I just posted that like a minute ago. How did you…” A cocky smirk split her face when the realization hit her. “You get notifications when I tweet, don’t you?”
I wanted to smack the smug look right off of her face. At least, I would have wanted to if she didn’t look so cute. It wasn’t fair that a girl with a personality like hers had a face like that. What was even more unfair was that body. A body that looked good even wearing her current boxer shorts and oversized shirt from some restaurant with a picture of a pepper and the words I'm hot at the top.
“Don’t be embarrassed,” Kinsley spoke again, clearly referring to the blush that had taken over my face. “I think it’s cute that you have notifications on for me. Who else do you have them on for?”
I shrugged my shoulders. “Just a few people.” There was no way I was going to tell her I only had notifications set up for two people - her and Becky. Yes, my ex. Apparently, I was a glutton for punishment.
Before this conversation could go any further, Leah walked into the room. She kicked at Kinsley’s feet, which were now stretched onto the coffee table in front of her. “Kins, what are you doing?” she scolded. “I thought you said you were going sightseeing with us today.”
“I am,” she answered, sounding confused by Leah’s questioning.
Leah looked down at her watch and then back at her friend. “Well, I told you we were leaving at 10:30, and it’s now 10:25.”
Kinsley again looked at her as if she didn’t know where the attitude was coming from. “I know. I was just about to get ready. Today is a five minute-er type day.” Kinsley followed up her statement by hopping off of the couch and sprinting down the hallway.
Leah laughed and pointed her thumb in the direction of the bedroom. “Just wait. This is actually really impressive.”
As soon as 10:30 hit, Kinsley walked into the living room of the apartment looking like a whole new woman. Her hair was pulled up into the perfect messy bun, she had just a slight hint of makeup on, and she was wearing jean shorts with a cute tank top. The most impressive part of her outfit were the lace up gladiator sandals, which probably would have taken me at least ten minutes to put on.
We left the apartment and immediately headed to Independence National Historical Park. Since I loved history, the experience should have been a lot of fun. Only, it wasn’t fun because Kinsley spent the whole time switching between complaining and making fun of it.
I had to admit that she was right about the Liberty Bell, but I still thought it was neat to see in person. I was actually relieved once we left the park and headed to a nearby bar, so I wouldn’t have to hear Kinsley complain anymore.
I quickly found out Kinsley became louder, and even more bitter and opinionated, once she started drinking. I decided the best way to deal with her attitude was to go drink for drink with her, and as dinnertime approached, we were both pretty drunk. For this reason, Leah thought it was for the best if we headed back to the apartment to eat.
“So, Grace,” Kinsley slurred as we stumbled side by side. “Tell me. How long ago did your bitch of an ex screw that other girl?”
I found myself growing irrationally angry at her words. Sure, she could have found a much nicer way to ask the question, but normally I would have just ignored her lack of empathy. Normally, I also didn’t drink the whole city of Philadelphia. “I told you she’s not a bitch” I snapped back.
“Whoa. OK, killer,” Kinsley chuckled. “How long ago did you catch your sweet, perfect girlfriend in your bed with another woman?”
Leah moved in between us and put an arm around Kinsley’s shoulder. “Hey Kins, remember how you told me to let you know when you were being douche-y? Well, you’re being a pretty big douche right now.”
Kinsley slipped out from underneath Leah’s arm, then moved over to the other side of me, now placing her arm around my shoulder. “She’s right. I am being a douche and I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to upset you. I just don’t like to see a pretty girl who doesn’t notice her own worth.”
Twenty-four hours ago if you had told me that Laurel Lake would call me pretty, I would have been ecstatic. But now, I only felt annoyed. “Please don’t hit on me,” I said softly, while pulling away from her and following Leah into the apartment.
Kinsley retreated to her bedroom, emerging just a few minutes later in the outfit she had been wearing earlier in the day. As she flopped down onto the couch, she looked over at me. “Just for the record, I wasn’t hitting on you. Trust me.”
“You say that like it would be so hard to believe that you could ever hit on me.” I knew I was rocking the boat, and even as the words left my mouth, I wondered why I was acting this way. It was so unlike me.
“Don’t get all butt hurt over it,” Kinsley huffed. “I meant what I said. You’re pretty, and I think you’re worth much more than you realize. Still, don’t take this the wrong way, but I wouldn’t touch that with a ten foot pole.” She waved her hand in my direction as she said the word that.
I laughed sarcastically, and a snort escaped at the same time. “How am I not supposed to take that the wrong way?”
Kinsley sighed. “I’m just saying. You’re surprisingly sexy and while that snort is adorably geeky, it just doesn’t do it for me. You’re way too emotional, and you take things too personally.”
“Is that so? Well, at least I’m not fake.”
“Hey guys, I think we should all just…” Leah tried to cut in, but was quickly cut off by Kinsley.
“Fake?! Seriously? How am I fake?”
I scoffed in response. “Seriously?! You hate love, yet you write these big, elaborate love stories. Then, you go online and continue to put on this persona of someone who isn’t you.”
“That’s because it isn’t me,” Kinsley replied between gritted teeth. “That is Laurel Lake.”
“Well, if you ask me, it’s not fair.” I was on a roll now with my body still buzzing from all the alcohol I had consumed. “You’re one person online and a completely different person in real life, but do you know what you really are? You’re just a disappointment.” As the last words left my lips, I placed my hand over my mouth. I didn’t know where that came from. Of course, I was disappointed that my idol wasn’t the person I thought she was, but calling someone a disappointment was just wrong.
“Well, I don’t have to be beat up on by some creepily obsessive fangirl, so I’m going to bed.” With those words, Kinsley stormed out of the room.
“Kins. Wait. It’s only dinner time,” Leah tried to yell after her.
I took in the frustrated look on Leah’s face, and it all became too much for me. Without realizing what was happening, I broke down into tears. “Sorry Leah, I think I’m just going to go to bed too. It’s been a long day.” I gave her a quick hug and headed down the hallway.
As I walked into the room, I heard Leah groan and whisper under her breath, “That went well.”
Chapter 5: Kinsley
I awoke the next day to the sound of knocking on my door. Before I could respond, Leah walked in and laid down next to me on the bed. “So yesterday was fun,” she said with a sigh.
I held my head as I replayed the events from the previous day. I could only remember bits and pieces, but I clearly remembered arguing with Grace. I felt bad about the fact that I had started the fight, but in just 24 hours that girl had learned how to completely press my buttons. “Look Leah, I’m…”
Leah put up a hand and shook her head, signaling for me to stop. “I’m not sure what happened yesterday, but that wasn’t like you. You’re not the type of person to get in a drunken fight, then stomp off to bed. I’m not fully blaming you. You were both drunk, and you both said things you shouldn’t have. I’m not mad at either of you, but I just want you to realize that it was very unlike both of you. Grace isn’t like that either, and she does f
eel awful about what she said.”
She should, I thought to myself. Sure, I had been more rude than I should have, and I did feel bad, but she called me a disappointment. That was a low blow.
“Anyway, we’re going to the zoo, and I was wondering if you wanted to come. I know how much you love feeding the giraffes.”
A smile spread onto my face from Leah’s words. “You do know my weakness, but I better stay home and get some writing done,” I lied.
“And avoid Grace?” Leah asked, while raising an inquisitive eyebrow.
I let out a defeated sigh in response. “I promise I’ll hang out with you guys when you get back, OK?”
“Thank you,” Leah answered sincerely, before standing up to leave my room.
Several hours later, when they arrived back at the apartment, I had yet to get any writing done. I had spent most of the day sleeping and playing with my pet chinchilla. Fortunately, the time had allowed me to move on from everything that had happened the night before, and I was ready to start fresh with Grace.
When I walked out into our living room, I found Grace and Leah sitting next to each other on the couch. Grace had some sort of stuffed animal sitting on her lap and when she stood and held it out toward me, I noticed it was a giraffe. “Please take this as a peace offering,” Grace said shyly, a slight blush creeping up her neck and settling on her face as the words left her mouth. “I’m really sorry about what I said last night. It’s no excuse, but I was super drunk. I normally don’t drink like that.” When I looked at the giraffe, now sitting in my hands, Grace added, “Sorry. I know it’s dorky. Leah told me that they’re your favorite part of the zoo.”
I wanted to joke around that it was a super dorky gesture, but I had a feeling Grace wasn’t the type of person I could joke with. “Nah, it’s cute. And she is right - giraffes are my second favorite animals. So I accept your apology, and I’m sorry as well. We both said things we shouldn’t have. I have a tendency to egg people on, especially after I’ve been drinking, and I’m sorry about that. We’ll just agree to start over.”