by Miasha
So the last tactic they wanted to employ was something I was very worried about. I mean, it was already frightening enough to be a snitch, but Detective Daily wanted me to wear a wire and try to get a confession out of Kenny. I refused at first, because the danger in being wired was too grave. But after the detectives explained to me that Kenny was a flight risk and that if I didn’t help them get him within the net couple days, he would most likely flee and take me with him. I cringed at the thought of being on the run with Kenny and gave in to the detectives. I’d rather risk my life trying to turn Kenny in than be on the run with him.
The detectives spent a great deal of time coaching me through what I was to say, do, and how I was to act when I got home. They had me wear a covert body wire that would be almost impossible to detect. And considering the fact that Kenny would be busy trying to plan an escape, they felt I would be safe wearing it.
When I walked in my house, it looked like a tornado had hit it. The police ransacked it. Shit was broken, tossed around, and turned upside down.
“What the hell happened in here?” I asked, as if I didn’t know the minute I walked in the door.
I crept through the living room, kitchen, family room, and dining room, and when I didn’t see Kenny, I went upstairs. I got to our bedroom, and the door was closed. I opened it slowly and was greeted by the barrel of gun.
I was so scared I couldn’t scream. I just froze up.
“Shit, Leah!” Kenny gasped. “You almost got ya ass shot! Why you ain’t announce yaself?”
I exhaled and put my hand to my heart. “I didn’t know anyone was here.”
Kenny put his gun back in its holster in the front of his pants. Then he got back to what he obviously was doing before I got there—packing clothes.
“The mafuckas came and snatched me up from the funeral yesterday afternoon. They had me at the police station for damn near twenty-four hours tryin’ to break me. And while I was in there, they got a warrant and tore the house up. Good thing I ain’t have shit in here,” Kenny explained, rushing his words to match the speed of his actions.
I was still startled from having a gun in my face, so I couldn’t focus on everything I was told to say and do by the detectives. I found myself just acting off my emotions.
“So what are you goin’ to do now?”
“I’m gettin’ the fuck outta here. My brother on his way here with a rental.”
“Why are you runnin’?”
Kenny stopped what he was doing and looked up at me. “What you mean, why am I runnin’? The cops is on my ass, that’s why!”
“But they don’t have shit on you!”
“As long as Nasir got breath in his body, the cops got somethin’ on me. And I can’t get at the nigga just yet.”
“Okay, so they got a witness. But it’s ya word against his. They can’t prove you did anything if you didn’t.”
“Yeah, but that’s just it, Leah. I did do somethin’. That’s why the fuck I’m gettin’ outta here.”
I sat down on the bed next to the suitcase that Kenny was throwin’ clothes into. Being close to him was mandatory in order to get his words clear on tape, the detectives had told me. But it was also a death trap, if you asked me. I was sweating profusely, and I hoped Kenny took it as my being scared for him as opposed to my being up to something.
“Yeah, well, they would have to prove it, and they obviously can’t if they let you go after interrogatin’ you for sixteen hours. But if you run, that’s half the proof right there.”
“And if I don’t run and they find my gun and run it through ballistics and see that the bullets match the one that killed that sucker-ass cop, and then they dust it and my fingerprints come up and they get a statement from Nas, then they got their proof and they got me.”
I shook my head. “I don’t understand. Why won’t you just get rid of the gun?”
“If I could I would, Leah. After I shot that fuckin’ cop, shit got chaotic. I was movin’ too fast. I thought I threw the gun in the trunk of the Impala, but when we dumped the car I didn’t see it in there. I don’t know if I dropped it or what. But I ain’t waitin’ around to see.”
I felt butterflies in my stomach. Kenny had just given me the confession the detectives needed. I tried to remain collected, though. It wasn’t over yet.
“Leah, look at me,” Kenny said. “The cops ain’t say nothin’ to you about me, did they? Are they askin’ questions about me or my brother?”
I bent my eyebrows and shook my head. I felt so much tension between us.
“You know I would fuckin’ kill you if you ever snitched on me? You know that, right?”
Ignoring the unimaginable fear I felt in my heart, I tried hard to display loyalty. “Kenny, I would kill myself.”
Kenny looked me in my eyes for some seconds before reacting to my comment. Then he smirked and proceeded to tell me his plan.
“I’m goin’ lay low in a hotel until Monday. I need you to meet up with Sammy and get my bread. He goin’ have it all ready for you. Then you goin’ meet up with Dahwoo and he goin’ bring it to me. After you finish the shit you doin’ with the cops, you can call me and come to where I’m at. But I ain’t goin’ be able to bring you with me while you got ties to the law. I’ll get caught.”
“Okay,” I complied. Anything to get Kenny to leave so that the cops could arrest him the minute he turned the corner.
Kenny’s phone rang as he zipped up his suitcase.
“You outside?”
“I’m comin’ now.”
Kenny leaned down and kissed me on my lips. “I appreciate you ridin’ for me, Leah.” Then he left the bedroom.
When the alarm system alerted me that the back door had been opened, confirming Kenny’s departure, I didn’t hesitate callin’ Detective Daily.
“Did y’all get that?”
“We did. We’re tailin’ the car now. It’s almost over, kiddo.”
At that, I hung up with the detective and started packing a bag for myself. Freedom felt near, and I was itchin’ to get at it. I didn’t even care to leave the bulk of my things behind. I just needed a few necessities and some clothes to last me a couple of weeks.
I sent a text to Nasir just to clear things up with him once and for all. Then I called my mom to let her know that I was on my way over there.
I grabbed my overnight bag and headed out of my bedroom. When I got to the stairs, Kenny appeared out of nowhere.
“How did you know I was in interrogation for sixteen hours?” he asked.
I had a boatload of questions at that point: What was Kenny still doin’ there? Who were the detectives tailin’ if it wasn’t Kenny? Had he heard my call to Detective Daily? But even though I felt like I was caught, I couldn’t unmask the truth prematurely. When I first agreed to be an informant against Kenny, I decided I was goin’ to ride it all the way out to the end. And that’s what I had to do.
“You told me,” I responded.
“I said I was in there for damn near twenty-four hours,” Kenny refreshed my memory. “How did you know it was exactly sixteen?”
I didn’t say anything, and my silence prompted Kenny to grip me by my neck. He pushed me against the wall, held his gun to my temple with one hand, and searched me with the other. When he came across the wire, he snatched it off me. My mind went blank as I tried to think up an excuse. And before any words could slip off my tongue, Kenny’s balled fist struck my face with so much force, it felt like I was hit with a brick. I instantly blacked out.
Nasir
It was the day after Brock’s funeral. I had went home to get some more of my clothes. When I got back to my mom and dad’s house, I noticed several unfamiliar cars in the driveway. I parked my car and walked up to the door. I let myself in with the key I’d had ever since I’d lived there. I walked straight back to the kitchen. My mom was sitting in the breakfast nook drinking a glass of wine. My grandmom was sitting opposite her.
“Nasir,” my mom said at the sight of me.
She stood up to hug me. Then my grandmom did the same.
“What’s up, Mom? What’s up, Grandmom? Where’s dad at?”
“All the men are out back,” my grandmom said.
“What’s wrong?” I asked, noticin’ tears in my mom’s puffy eyes.
My mom broke down. “Nasir, what is goin’ on? What are y’all gettin’ y’allselves into? Ya dad won’t tell me anything. But he called ya uncles over here and some other guys, and whenever they’re around, trouble is right behind them. I don’t know what y’all are plannin’ to do, but I hope it’s nothin’ crazy. I came this close to losin’ you.” My mom held up her pointer finger over her thumb to indicate a pinch. “And I don’t wanna ever have to walk down that road again,” she cried.
“And God willing, you won’t ever have to walk down that road again.” I tried to comfort her. “You just trippin’, that’s all, Mom. Ain’t nothin’ goin’ happen to nobody.”
“I don’t know about that, Nasir. Your dad is steamin’. Whatever that guy Ken or Kenny did got him furious.”
My phone alerted me that I had a text message as I was trying to soothe my mom’s worries. It was from Leah. And the only reason I gave it my time was because I figured I could possibly use her to get to Kenny. Despite my mom’s concerns, I had already made up my mind that Kenny needed to get what was comin’ to him. That stunt he pulled in the hospital and then him admittin’ to killin’ Brock definitely put him on the hit list. And that wasn’t even my thing, but certain niggas left you no other choice.
Nasir, in case I never see you again, I need you to know two things: 1) I never had an agreement with the cops to give info on you, your dad, or anybody you’re affiliated with besides Kenny. I only told Kenny that so he wouldn’t wonder how I got out of jail without posting bail. He’s actually the one I’ve been informing against. When I left you at the hospital, I went straight to the police station and I told the cops about his involvement in Brock’s and the cop’s death, which explains why he was locked up at Brock’s funeral. 2) I really love you and hope you can forgive me for the things that I did do wrong. And when it comes out that I’m tellin’ the truth about this, I hope we can be friends again, if not for us, for the sake of our child. I’m pregnant, and in my heart I believe it’s yours.
I rubbed my mom’s shoulder and excused myself. I went into the half bath on the first floor. I was agitated by the text message because I didn’t know if I could believe it or not. I didn’t know if Leah was playin’ me.
Kenny did get locked up at the funeral, and I hadn’t said anything about him when the cops questioned me, so how else would they have known his involvement? But then again, who was to say that the cops locked him up on that? Kenny was in the streets heavy, so he could have gotten locked up on a number of charges.
But on another note, Leah did say that she couldn’t leave Kenny because she was tied to him for reasons beyond her control. I was caught in the matrix. I didn’t know what to believe, who to trust, what to do.
And the more I thought about things and tried to put all the pieces of the puzzle together, the more confused I became. On the one hand, I didn’t think Leah was ever trying to set me up. I mean, she never pried for information. Plus, my pop and me wasn’t doin’ nothin’ like that. On the other hand, I couldn’t put shit past her.
Then this whole thing about her being pregnant threw me off. Why would she tell me that in a text? Why wouldn’t she have told me when I saw her in person at the hospital? I had a lot of questions for Leah, too many to text. I called her. Fuck it. If Kenny was near her, she wouldn’t have texted me.
The phone rang three times before somebody picked up. I waited to hear Leah’s voice, and when I didn’t I spoke, “Hello?”
I waited a few seconds for a response then I said hello again. No one responded still, but in the background I could hear screaming.
“KENNY, STOP, PLEEEEASE! KENNNNYYY!”
“Please, Kenny, don’t kill me…Please.”
My heart sank as I realized what I was hearing. I ran out the bathroom and toward the front door.
“Nasir, where you goin’?” my mom shouted out to me.
“To Leah’s house! That nigga is goin’ to kill her!”
My mom was yelling something to me, but I couldn’t hear her. I jumped in my car and punched the gas. It was a challenge trying to drive with one good arm, especially while holding my phone to my ear. I managed to turn my blue tooth on so that I could free up my hand. As I was straining to hear what was bein’ done to Leah, my other line started ringing. It was my mom. I ignored the call because I didn’t want to disconnect with Leah. I didn’t even want to hang up to call the police. And anyway, I didn’t have Leah’s address to give to the police if I did call. I just knew how to get to her house.
“This’ll teach you to wear a wire on me, bitch!” I heard Kenny’s voice in the distance.
Then I heard Leah’s voice, and she was much clearer.
“The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. he maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name’s sake. Yea, though I walk through the valley of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.”
I took a hard swallow. It became clear to me that what Leah had texted me was real and that it may indeed be the last time I got to hear from her. Tears actually formed in my eyes as I listened to her recite a Bible verse.
Having just laid my best friend to rest the day before and now hearing the one girl I can say I was in love with speak what sounded like her last words, my heart felt like it had literally broken. I’d never known such pain.
“LEAH!” I screamed with all my might. “LEAH, DON’T LEAVE ME LIKE THIS!”
Leah
I woke up to the sound of Nasir’s voice. I lifted my arm and placed my cell phone as close to my ear as possible.
“Nasir?” I muffled, still somewhat dazed.
“LEAH!”
“Nasir? Am I in heaven?”
“No, baby. Heaven ain’t ready for you yet. I need you to stay with me for a while. You hear me?”
“I must be in heaven if I’m talkin’ to you.”
Nasir said, “No, Leah. Look around you. You’re home, right? Tell me you’re at your house.” His voice was cracking as if he was crying.
I opened my eyes, and although everything was blurry, I recognized where I was. “Yeah. I’m in the hall,” I told him. My throat was so itchy.
“Okay, now who is there with you?”
“I don’t see anybody. But”—I coughed—“it’s smoky.”
“Smoky? Like how smoky?”
I couldn’t answer him because I couldn’t stop coughing.
“LEAH! LEAH! GET YOURSELF TOGETHER, LEAH! CAN YOU MOVE? ARE YOU ABLE TO GET UP?”
I panicked as I grabbed the banister with my free hand and pulled myself over closer to the stairs. There was a fire in my living room.
My mind told me to run for a window, but my body wouldn’t budge. I lost my self-control as I was filled with terror. I started screaming and crying at the same time.
“HELP ME! HELLLLPPP! SOMEBODY!!!!” I freaked out.
“LEAH! WHAT’S WRONG? WHAT DO YOU SEE?”
“NASIR, MY HOUSE IS ON FIRE! I CAN’T MOVE! I THINK MY LEGS ARE BROKEN! I CAN’T MOVE! I’M GOIN’ DIE, NASIR!” I screamed and then began choking.
“NO! YOU’RE GONNA BE FINE! I’M FIVE MINUTES AWAY! NOW I NEED YOU TO CALM DOWN. I’M GONNA CALL THE POLICE ON MY THREE-WAY, OKAY? AND I’MA NEED YOU TO GIVE THEM YOUR ADDRESS!”
I heard Nasir, but I couldn’t respond to him. My lungs were trying to fight the thick smoke that quickly clogged the air. I was choking to the point of
vomiting.
“LEAH! STAY WITH ME!” I heard Nasir shout. I wanted to keep the phone to my ear, but I was feeling too weak. I was looking around for something to cover my nose with to keep from inhaling the smoke. I noticed my overnight bag on the top step. I tried sliding over to it. Meanwhile, I put Nasir on speakerphone and put my cell phone in my bra. That way I could use both my hands to get me across the floor.
“LEAH, ARE YOU STILL WITH ME?”
“I’m trying to get to air,” I said, my voice growing more raspy.
“Okay, okay. Good,” Nasir said. I’m goin’ to call—” UUURRRRKKKKK! BOOOOOOM!
A loud crash interrupted Nasir’s sentence. Before I could say anything, I heard another loud boom. That time, though, it didn’t come from the other end of the phone. It came from downstairs.
“HELLLPPPP ME! HELLLPPPP ME!” I used all the energy I had left to scream.
I heard many deep voices giving commands back and forth. Then I heard footsteps rushing toward me. I cried at the sight of three firemen appearing through the smoke.
“Nasir!” I tried to yell. “Nasir! They’re here!”
I didn’t get a reply. In fact, I didn’t hear anything coming from my phone. Nasir must have hung up.
I was carried out of my burning house and placed on a stretcher.
My eyes closing, I said, “I think my boyfriend was in a car accident. Can y’all send somebody to help him?”
At that, an oxygen mask was put over my nose and mouth. I was lifted into the back of an ambulance and given an IV. Moments later an overwhelming feeling of exhaustion came over me, and I closed my eyes.
Nasir
By the time my car had stopped spinning, police cars were already on the scene. That was a good thing, too, because I could get one of them to follow me to Leah’s house before it was too late.
“Officer!” I shouted out as I limped toward the many cop cars that were blocking the intersection of Presidential Boulevard and City Avenue, some feet up from where my car was hit.